20. ZANE
ZANE
Waking up with Ava in my arms feels like a dream come true. I’ve been wishing for this moment ever since she stopped sleepwalking into my bed, and the heavens have finally smiled upon me. I don’t like how she ended up here in the first place, but I’m glad that of all places, she feels safe with me.
She looks so peaceful sleeping—one of her arms thrown over my torso, the other one tucked to her side, her face squished against my chest, her breath caressing my bare skin.
Last night, I intended for us to talk, I really did.
I wanted to get to the bottom of everything, but things escalated and we ended up having sex.
I was hurt when she refused to open up to me, but there’s not much I can do about that.
I don’t regret what happened; it just proves how much power Ava has over me, but it was the wrong time to fall for her charms.
She mumbles something inaudible, and I realize that she does this a lot—talk in her sleep. I hope it’s not another symptom of whatever is going on in her life.
I want to stay in bed with her all day, but unfortunately, duty calls. I missed a whole day of work yesterday, which means I need to work twice as much today.
Five more minutes though—I’ll leave her after five minutes.
My arms tighten around her, she snuggles deeper into my side, and those five minutes turn into an hour.
By the time I manage to drag myself out of the cabin and to the stables, the morning is halfway gone.
Ava is still sleeping peacefully in my bed, and I didn’t want to wake her, so I’ve left her a note.
Everything in me is telling me to go back and get back into bed with her, but I know better than to give in to my urges. I bury myself in my work, letting it distract me from the temptation that is Ava Noa.
My father and I cross paths while I’m making my rounds in the Sunset stables.
“Since when do you hum?” he mocks, mirth all over his face.
I didn’t even realize that I was.
“Since when are you so nosy?” I retort, recalling that he sent Jace after me yesterday.
I have yet to know what he wanted, but I’m not curious enough to ask. I have a feeling it will ruin my mood.
“I have every right to be nosy—I am your father.”
I scoff as I pick up the chart hung up on the door of our latest arrival.
With Lilly gone, we had room for one more, and this one is a male—Diesel, a twenty-six-year-old Appaloosa with the most striking spotted coat.
He’s had a good run, and now we’re gonna make sure he lives out his final days happy and in a safe, warm place.
“How is she doing?” he asks, and I don’t need to ask who he’s talking about.
“She was still sleeping when I left. I think she’s good for now, but I still don’t know what really happened,” I explain.
“I’m glad she’s okay. We were all very worried, and I don’t know either, but I can tell you this—if you’re patient enough, she will come to you,” he advises.
“Patience has never been a virtue of mine.”
He pats my shoulder comfortingly. “Unfortunately, but you’re going to have to learn if you want to be with her.”
“I never said I did,” I defend.
He smirks, adding a squeeze to his pat. “You don’t have to—it’s all in your eyes. Food for thought. Have a good day, son.”
With that, he saunters away, leaving me with lots to think about. I haven’t really considered what the end game looks like for Ava and me. Even if she ends up opening up to me and we start something, her time here is limited, with half of it already gone.
She’s a world-famous star who belongs on the big stages, while I’m a simple ranch foreman whose life revolves around Iron Stallion.
We are worlds apart, so I don’t know how we can ever work out.
She’s only here on vacation, so I might just be a fling to her—one that will be forgotten once she’s back in LA.
This train of thought dampens my mood, so I find myself wandering to the stall of the one girl who will never leave me or break my heart. Jaz looks happy to see me, and her attitude puts me in a much better state.
I’m cleaning out her stall when we receive company. Ava is here, all smiles as she stands on the other side of the gate to Jaz’s stall. She’s wearing her own jeans, but she’s still in my t-shirt. Something about her in my clothes just fits right, and I hope she never stops wearing them.
I walk up to her, glad to see her up and about. “You look well-rested.”
“I’ve slept a lot, so how can I not?” she replies.
“Have you eaten?” I query, already afraid of the answer.
I’m worried about Ava. She’s supposed to be in our care, but every time I see her, she seems to have lost more and more weight.
I’ve had to intimidate her multiple times to at least eat something.
She cannot live on coffee and energy drinks alone unless she wants to fade into nothing, and I’m not going to let that happen on my watch.
“What’s her name?” she asks, reaching out to touch Jaz, who is happy to receive the attention.
I know she’s trying to distract me, and I let her—for now.
“Jaz, short for Jasmine.”
“Jaz,” she echoes, testing the name on her lips. “It’s beautiful, just like her.”
I don’t respond, but I nod ever so subtly, agreeing with her. I named her myself, so her name has a special meaning to me—one that has always connected me to the very beauty who is with us in this stall right now. Maybe I’ll tell her about it one day.
“Can I brush her coat?” she requests.
“Sure, she loves that,” I reply, unlatching the gate to let her in.
She finds the brush herself and proceeds to indulge herself and Jaz. I pick up the rake and resume my duties but keep an eye on my two girls while doing so.
I don’t know why Ava is here, but I’m not about to start questioning that—I’m just glad that she is. It’s a comfortable silence until she drops a bomb on me.
“She used to exploit me,” Ava says so quietly, I almost fail to catch the words.
“What?”
She doesn’t pause the brushing or turn to look at me, so I move closer to hear her better.
“My mother was abusive, and so was her husband and his son. When my career took off and the money, sponsorships, and brand deals started rolling in, they got greedy and started treating me like their cash cow. I was no longer doing music because I loved it, but to maintain their lavish lifestyle,” she explains.
My fist clenches in anger around the rake, but something tells me that she’s not done, so I let her finish first. She’s finally opening up to me, unprompted, and I need to hear the end of it.
“The worst of it was when Estevan—“
“Your stepbrother?”
“Yes,” she nods, and her voice cracks. Somehow I know what she’s going to say before she even says it. “H-he, h-he, he tried to force himself on me...”
Someone hold me back right now before I commit murder!
“He wasn’t successful, but when I told my mom, she gaslit me into thinking that it was all in my head, that maybe I misinterpreted his affections.
She took his side over her own daughter’s, and that’s when I realized that I was done with her, with them.
So I fired her as my manager, cut them off, promoted Lou to manager, and moved out on my own.
It was too late though—their abuse had taken root, thus the terrible sleeping habits, nightmares, sleepwalking, and—“
“Not eating,” I add.
“Yes, that too.”
The more she speaks, the guiltier I feel for how I treated her when she first arrived. I kicked her out of my bed—twice, for crying out loud—when all she needed was a safe space. I drop the rake and pull her into my arms.
“I’m so sorry,” I apologize, kissing her hair.
She fists her hands on my shirt and buries her face in my chest. “Didn’t we ban that word?”
“Looks like you’re rubbing off on me,” I tease, and she giggles.
It’s such a beautiful sound, but it’s laden with so much pain. I pull her back and cup her face. “You didn’t deserve what happened to you, and I’m so glad you managed to get away.”
“It wasn’t easy, but my life is better now. I’m still working toward getting better though.”
I kiss her temple and hug her again. “Don’t worry—you are safe here, with us.”
“Thank you.”
We fall silent for a moment, and with this new revelation, a few things come to light. “Now that I know what was truly going on, it explains a lot of things.”
“Like what?”
“You’re gonna hate me for this,” I sigh.
She pulls back and meets my eyes. “I would never. Tell me,” she insists.
She’s already opened up to me, so I owe her the same courtesy.
“After the accident, I made efforts to reach out to you, but your mother always intercepted me, and she wasn’t so kind.
To sum it up, she sowed seeds of hatred, told me how much you disliked me because of how I’d almost ruined your career.
She treated me like dirt and made me believe that you wanted nothing to do with me. ”
She shakes her head, eyes wide with regret. “I thought you hated me. She made me cut off all contact with you because apparently you were going to sue me for ruining your career, and we couldn’t afford it at the time. She insisted that you hated me and never wanted to see me.”
“I could never hate you, Miss Diva. I never have—how do I even start?”
“So we were both manipulated by her?”
I nod. “And lost five precious years.”
“I am so sorry.”
“I’m sorry too. For thinking your life was perfect when it was anything but. I won’t let them hurt you ever again. And I promise to make it up to you for all the time we’ve lost,” I assure her, pulling her back into my arms and holding tight.
She is so strong for still being here and finding the courage to run away after what they put her through. Those three better hope we never cross paths because I will not hold back on making them pay.