Chapter 5 #2
“Just cream, please,” I say, watching as he pours and nodding when the color is right.
He hands my cup to me and arranges a tray with pitchers of milk and cream and a sugar bowl so we can serve ourselves for the next cup. A tiered display of digestive biscuits, scones, cheese, and fruit sit next to the carafe of coffee.
“Will that be all, Your Highness?” the butler asks with a thick Eastern European accent.
“Yes, thank you, Yakiv,” the prince replies.
Yakiv bows and gives the prince a small smile, leaving the way he came. The door snicks shut behind him, and I’m very aware that we are alone.
The countryside flies by us in shades of green, lakes dot the landscape, and sheep graze in sloping fields.
We sit in silence for a bit as we sip our coffee, but rather than feeling awkward, it feels good, like we could be comfortable together in any situation.
But my mind is still running in circles, and I can’t deny that I want to talk to him, to get to know this man that has me so distracted.
Who is so far above me yet continues to seek me out.
The longer we sit without talking, just him and me and no expectations or pressure, the more I think Rebecca might be right about him. Something about him feels safe. “I just want to apologize again for the way I acted last night,” I finally get up the nerve to say.
“Please, you don’t have to. There’s nothing to forgive.”
I face him. “No, but I think I should at least explain.”
He turns toward me, too. His piercing blue eyes seem to see my soul, and maybe I don’t need to explain fully, but some is needed.
I clear my suddenly dry throat, trying not to get lost in that unknowable aura that surrounds him.
“I, um, I don’t have much experience with men taking an interest in me, friendly or otherwise.
And what I do have is mostly negative. So, when you said you wanted to show me a good time and your voice got all husky and dreamy, it set off alarm bells in my head. ”
Prince Friedrich blinks a few times, his mouth slightly open. “I-I…” He shakes his head and blinks again. “I am so sorry.” He takes my empty hand in his. “I didn’t know. I honestly was just being flirty. I apologize for making you feel unsafe. It’s the very last thing I want.”
“No. It’s absolutely not your fault. It’s my own messed up head.” His eyes drop to my lip where I chew the corner, a nervous habit my mother used to chastise me for.
“I promise I will simmer down on the flirtatious end.”
I let go of his hand and wrap both around my cup, taking a moment to compose myself and gather courage.
It’s hard to think when all my nerves are standing on end at his touch.
“But maybe I don’t want you to simmer down,” I say into my china cup, heat rushing into my cheeks.
Those stupid spicy books must be going to my head or something because it’s been a long, long time since I’ve wanted to pursue anything with a man.
Even just companionship, but I can’t ignore the way this man lights my nerves on fire with the simplest touch.
The prince straightens a little. “What was that?”
I set my cup down and turn so we’re once again face-to-face. “What if I don’t want you to stop?” If I don’t stop with my lip, it will soon be bloody.
“Miss Aurelia,” he says with a grin. “What exactly are you getting at?”
I sigh and roll my eyes, trying hard to contain my embarrassment at even bringing it up. “I’m saying, maybe I don’t want you to rein in the other fifteen percent.”
His eyes go wide, and I can hear my heart in my ears even as something crackles in the air between us. Oh, this was a terrible idea! What if he doesn’t actually think about me like that? This seemed so much easier in the books.
There’s that feeling again, like he can see into my mind.
Prince Friedrich watches me for a long while, his own face unreadable.
I should feel nervous, uncovered under his intensity, but instead it’s exciting and freeing.
I’m not sure what makes me trust him so completely, but here I am, and my heart is fluttering in anticipation instead of trepidation.
“So,” he says after a pause that feels like an eternity. “What I think you’re getting at, and correct me if I’m wrong, is that you want me to show you what good times could be had with a man?”
I swallow hard and give a slow nod. “I thought maybe you would be a safe choice.”
He scoffs.
“No. Hear me out.” I stand and start pacing the small cabin, anxious energy getting the best of me. “I have hidden myself away from the attentions of men for years and never felt a need to change that until now. Now I feel these things. This… this…”
“Attraction?” he supplies.
“Sure. That.”
“Sexual attraction?”
I spin around to face him again. “Let’s not get ahead of ourselves here.”
He holds his hands up in surrender. “I’m not getting ahead of myself at all.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, I’m sexually attracted to you.”
Heat floods my face for the umpteenth time this afternoon, and I turn back to the safety of grass and rolling hills and farm animals.
“Okay, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to press. I just thought it was obvious.”
“You’re awfully forward.”
His smirk is audible. “I’m a man who knows what I want.”
“And you always get what you want, hmm?”
He makes a sound somewhere between a huff and a laugh. “What, because I’m a prince?”
“Well… Yeah.”
I can see his reflection in the window, that confident Prince Friedrich swagger, as he comes to stand behind me. My entire being is acutely aware of his proximity. “If only that were so, my dear, Miss Aurelia.”
“When have you ever not gotten what you wanted?” I can barely whisper.
“Right now.”
His warm breath on my ear makes my skin erupt in goosebumps. I could turn my head to the side just a fraction and capture those gorgeous lips. Feel the tickle of his beard on my face. Would it be scratchy or soft? I’m dying to know.
He breathes softly against my neck, and a pleasant feeling pools low in my belly. Then he backs off a step, and the distance is almost as painful as the sad expression on his beautiful face. “If I always got what I wanted, I wouldn’t be in this engagement game show farce in the first place.”
“Don’t you want to marry?”
“I mean, yeah. But not like this.” The prince waves a hand frantically in the air.
“How would you like then?”
He sags back into his padded chair. “I don’t even fucking know. I guess,” he trails off. “I want something real. Someone who sees me.”
“Sees you?” I return to my seat next to him, keeping every impulse in check as his empty hand simply begs for me to take it in mine.
He groans, running a hand over his beard. “I don’t know. But I’ll know when I meet her.”
Those blue eyes lock on mine again, and the air feels like right before a thunderstorm, when your skin gets prickly and the tiny hairs on your arms stand up. As if the very air carries a current of electricity.
I’m unable to keep still again, and I go to the minibar and study the alcohol along the shelves. “I think I need a drink for this conversation.”
“Should you be drinking on the job?” he asks, already at my side, still giving off Jules.
I shrug. “One glass won’t hurt, right?”
Prince Friedrich laughs. “How about a shot, then? Quick and effective.”
“Please.”
He takes down two glasses and pulls a square bottle with a black label from under the bar.
I raise an eyebrow. “Really? Jack Daniels?”
“What?”
“It’s just, that’s kind of a poor excuse for whiskey.”
He chuckles. “Oh, you need to meet my friend Miles.” We clink our glasses together and toss back the liquor. “One more?” he offers.
I hold a hand up. “No, I shouldn’t. Gotta be ready if the kids wake up.”
“Sure,” the prince agrees. We stay leaned against the bar as the train continues to rattle along. The faint hint of his subtly smoky cologne is almost as intoxicating as the whiskey. “So, it appears you’ve been giving this a bit of thought. What makes you think I’m safe?”
“We can enjoy each other’s, um, company without any sort of expectations, right?”
“How so?”
I start pacing again, my body full of pent-up nerves, the shot having done little to help.
All my common sense is screaming at me to stop this ridiculous conversation, but the part of me that responds to his touch, his nearness, the deep rolling timbre of his voice, overrules any sense of self-preservation.
I feel safe with him, and that has to mean something.
“This whole thing with finding you a wife.” I wave my hand, gesturing in the air.
“I have no expectation this will be any more than whatever we decide it will be.”
“And you think you can do, let’s just call it what it is, friends with benefits without letting feelings get in the way?”
I nod. “I have goals, Your Highness. And a man would only get in the way of that. And you have duties to fulfill, and any woman outside of your little aristocratic circle would just be in the way of that.”
He steps toward me, and I stop pacing. “Very pragmatic.”
My skin burns as he strokes the back of a finger, oh so softly, down my cheek.
I’m lost again in his fathomless blue eyes.
“So then, I guess we should discuss what this thing looks like.” His arm around my waist pulls me in closer so my chest is almost to his.
I can’t see his face anymore, but I note the pulse bounding in his neck, hear his shallow breaths, smell the scent that is so alluringly Prince Friedrich.
Just then, my phone chimes and I jump out of his hold. An alert from the baby monitor app pops up.
“Dern! Liam is stirring,” I say, looking at the video feed. “He’ll be up in a minute.”
The prince’s lips form into a hard line, and his shoulders drop a few inches. “Go tend to your charges, Nanny Sumner,” he says with a sigh.
My hand is already on the door. “I’m sorry to run in the middle of this.”
He waves me off. “Come find me tonight after the children have gone to bed. I’ll be in whatever suite they count as the penthouse in a town like Ardsbend.”
I’m already in the corridor, but poke my head back in to shoot him one last smile. “I will.”
He gives a wink that makes me want to melt. “Until then, Miss Aurelia.”
“Your Highness.”