Chapter 21
Spencer
I
’m not putting up with Lyra talking in circles. It’s like she’s not listening, and I’m being honest and straightforward about everything.
Now.
Finally.
It’s always been that way with us—two steps forward and one giant leap back. Lyra would send me a letter a week until she got upset with me over a perceived slight, like when I invited Bo and Odin to my place in Toronto for the weekend but not her.
She pushes for more than the friendship that I have with the princes, and I’ve never been certain if it’s because she’s jealous of her brothers or it’s something she really wants.
The princes, because of their interests, have had a kind of freedom that she’s always craved.
She puts herself in the public eye, and with that come restrictions and scrutiny that any beautiful woman would have to deal with, regardless of whether she’s a princess.
I’ve spent too many years with these kinds of upsets with Lyra, but I’m not about to put up with them anymore. The stakes are too high. There’s too much history between us for this to be easy, but she’s too important for me not to put in the effort.
I fumble for her hand under the water. It’s easier to say these things when I’m touching her. And once I admit I want to touch her, it’s like I need to touch her all the time.
I think not touching her might drive me crazy.
“Did you think about how your decision to be on this show would hurt me?” I ask. “To open the doors for all these men to have a shot with you?”
Her blue eyes widen. “Are you trying to guilt me?”
“No, just being truthful.” I blow out my breath as I capture her hand. “The only good thing about you doing this is that it’s going to make me be honest with you.”
“Are you telling me you weren’t honest before?”
“I wasn’t honest in that I never told you that you are the woman I compare all other women to.”
There. I said it. I’m not sure which one of us is more surprised.
“And no one has ever measured up,” I finish in a rush.
“No one. You are the gold standard, Lyra. You have ruined me for other women. If I get involved with someone, it’s only because they remind me of you.
The only reason I was with Abigail is that we were such good friends, and then we crossed the line and I was too comfortable to stop it. ”
“You were comfortable?” Lyra whispers, her lip curling with disapproval.
“I know, it’s horrible. It wasn’t fair to her or myself.
Abigail is an incredible woman, but she’s not you.
And that’s why I’m here, because I’ve never been able to find someone just like you.
Because there’s no one. No one with your sense of adventure, or your passion for life, and definitely no one with a connection as strong as the one between us.
That’s why I’ve been dreaming about having moments like this with you for my entire life. ”
Lyra’s lips part and fall open as if in slow motion. Her gaze searches my face like it’s struggling to find the truth in my eyes.
That was the truth.
This is what raw honesty is like with Lyra.
“Moments like what?” she whispers.
I clasp our fingers together. “Moments like this where we’re not fighting.”
“We do fight a lot,” she admits.
“That’s because you’re exasperating.” But I smile as I say it, rubbing my thumb along her delicate wrist.
“You’re exasperating.”
“That’s a childish comeback. You don’t have anything else?”
“You’re a lot of things.”
“All of them bad?”
She shakes her head.
“Do you believe me that I’m here for you?” Slowly, she nods. “And I don’t expect special treatment, and this isn’t a rebound or some sort of spy mission—”
“What?”
“One of the guys asked that. You.” I pull our hands out of the water and rest them against my chest. “You’re the only reason I’m here. And yes, the timing is bad, but what else is new? I think the timing has always been bad for us.”
“Maybe,” she concedes, and she doesn’t pull her hand away.
Of course, that is the moment that we’re interrupted.
A shadow falls over us and I look up to see a dripping Basher beside the hot tub.
I never would have imagined a drummer being so muscular. “Do you know Princess Tema has never been on a slip and slide?” he demands.
I’m so caught up in Lyra that it takes a moment to understand what he’s saying. “A what?”
“Slip and slide. That’s what they’re called, isn’t it? Those yellow plastic things that you get wet and then slide down.”
I blink. “I don’t think that generation even knows what it is.”
“But I do.” Lyra squeezes my hand before pulling away to climb out of the hot tub and immediately the water feels cooler when she’s not beside me. “Don’t you remember that super-hot summer when I was ten and Bo and Kalle made us one on the castle lawn?”
“You were nine,” I correct.
“Nine. Tema needs that experience, so let’s build her one,” Lyra decides.
That’s all it takes to set a plan in motion—Lyra is the queen of our little bubble of reality and her every word is law.
She announces what she wants, and as Tema jumps up and down with excitement, the men move into action. I’m left with red legs from being in the hot water for too long, and a smile on my face because it seems I’m finally getting somewhere with Lyra.
Boone, with his construction background, takes the lead. Deciding the slope of the lawn beside the hotel is the perfect angle, he disappears into the hotel for a few minutes, returning with a roll of plastic and a hose.
“Get some soap to make it slippery,” Lyra instructs.
“Not too much,” Tanner warns, Tema perched high on his shoulders. “Don’t want the little miss to go flying off.”
“But the little miss wants to go flying!” Tema cries and Tanner jogs along the grass with Tema’s arms outstretched to take his place in line for the slip and slide.
Jon insists on going first to check for safety, with Fireman Dylan waiting at the bottom in case of accidents. It’s all very organized.
After a few of the men run and slide down the plastic, ending up at the bottom dripping with soap bubbles and howling with laughter, Tema insists on taking her turn.
They all cheer her on, but no one as loudly as Tanner.
“I can’t believe you kissed him,” I mutter, not letting Lyra get too far away from me. Lyra turns to me in surprise. “Why do you say that?”
“I didn’t hear it from him, in case you’re wondering. He’s a good guy,” I say reluctantly. “But I guess the guys report to each other on who gets a kiss.”
“Do they give details?”
I shake my head. “If they said anything disrespectful about you, I would see them out of here.”
She rolls her eyes. “You can’t always protect me, Spencer.”
“I can, and I will.”
“Were you jealous?” The flirtatious voice is new. I’ve heard it before, but never when Lyra speaks to me. I’ve always thought it was because Lyra refused to flirt with me, but maybe that’s what we’ve been doing, all this time.
Regardless of what Lyra’s definition of flirting is, I’m not letting the voice get to me. It’s hard enough to stand here with her in her bathing suit.
Bikini. Blue.
I shift, taking a step closer, but not nearly as close as I’d like to be. “I’m not answering that because I told myself I don’t want to fight with you today,” I say, keeping my gaze on her face and not on the other men looking at her.
“Why would telling me you’re jealous make us fight?”
“Because I would follow up with how I don’t want you to kiss anyone but me ever again.”
She drops her gaze to my lips and my heart leaps like Tema jumping in the pool. And then she smiles. “You know, if you were to say that, it will only make me kiss more of them, don’t you?”
I heave a sigh. “Yes, I know, because you hate being told what not to do.”
Lyra laughs and in the middle of the chaos and uncertainty of a reality romance show, I realize I’m happy.
I’m happy with Lyra. I always have been.
“Lyra!” Tanner shouts. “Come take your turn.”
“Coming!” She takes two steps away from me, and my heart gives a lurch. Time to share her—at least while we’re on camera. And then she turns around, facing me as she walks backward.
“I never kissed him, you know.” Giving me a wink, she jogs away to join the group.
“You really had to say no kissing today, didn’t you?” I call after her.