19. Tristan
CHAPTER 19
TRISTAN
I’m doing my level best to pay attention to what these very important people are saying to me. They are members of boards we rely heavily on within the government, they are the people who make donations to many charitable causes we support as the leaders of our nation. But the fact of the matter is, I’m distracted.
Completely and totally distracted.
By one person. The person who has had my attention since she appeared in my life.
My soon-to-be wife on the other side of the room.
Over the course of the last few hours, I’ve observed her from afar. Unfortunately I can’t be at her side; tradition calls for us to work rooms separately so that we can give more people the attention of the crown. Watching her smile at the appropriate times, laugh when the situation called for it, and thoroughly bewitch anyone she’s come into contact with makes me proud. The worst part about it? I want her to be with me. Tonight, I don’t want to share her laughs, smiles, or anything else with anyone. They are all mine, and I’m salty I have to share.
“I heard about the situation going on,” Barrett Wimberly, son of one of my father’s biggest supporters, whispers as he comes to stand next to me.
He and I have been friends for years, I would consider us very good friends, if asked. “It’s been taken care of.” I take a sip of my scotch. “Just barely.”
“Did you face any opposition, my king?” The side of his mouth twitches with a grin as he lifts his own scotch up to take a drink.
“Fuck off,” I whisper. “How long have we known each other? You’ll never call me King.” My mouth twitches as well. I’m grateful to have people like this in my life. My father doesn’t, and it’s obvious in the way he’s secluded himself in past years. “At least to my face.”
He lets the laugh overtake him, as do I. Laughing with friends is the best thing to alleviate a stressful situation, outside of being with Amelia.
“To answer your question, no opposition yet,” I sigh. “But I haven’t officially taken the crown yet either. I’m prepared for there to be something. In this day and age, it seems no one lets anyone else peacefully do what they’re supposed to. There’s always someone in the crowd who wants to ruin it for everyone else.”
“It’s going to be a big week for you when you do. Marriage, ruling of a nation, the crown. I mean this will be the biggest week of your life.”
The way he says it, presses forward how much is going to change. It’s more real when others say it.
“No doubt,” I agree. “I know I can be honest with you, and I have to say I think I’m more excited about marriage. The crown, the title, the palace—that’s all good. But there’s something about her.” I tilt my glass in her direction.
Barrett glances at me, his eyebrows drawn together. “Are you perhaps falling in love with your soon-to-be wife?”
I take another sip of the scotch, letting it work its way down my throat. The burn is welcome as I contemplate what he’s asked. It’s not an easy answer. Just like anything else worth having, love is complicated, and I’m unsure of whether I’m ready to say the words to anyone. “Love is a strong word, one I haven’t said much of since my mother passed away, but I do find myself caring deeply for her.”
He snorts, like he doesn’t believe me. And maybe he doesn’t, but that’s his issue, not mine.
“You’ve got it bad, Tristan.”
I shrug as my eyes track her across the room. There are a few things I’m willing to share with my friend, honestly with anyone who asks. There are certain parts of Amelia’s personality I wish everyone were privy to. “She makes my days better and I’ve never had someone who did that for me.”
“Then I would say you’re a very lucky man.” Barrett claps my shoulder as he moves on to the next person he needs to speak to.
Now that I’m alone, I slyly slink into the shadows, effectively avoiding everyone who may want to stop me and have a word. It’s not what I’m supposed to do, but I can’t seem to help myself. I want to have a few moments to see her, see how she reacts to everything going on with us. I want to make sure she’s happy. It’s becoming my main goal in life. To make sure she’s happy and taken care of. With my back against the wall, I observe Amelia. Watching her has become one of my favorite pastimes. When she doesn’t know my eyes are on her, I can see how she’s really handling her new reality. The one who attentively listens to the person speaking, bends slightly down to hear an older person, holds the eye of the one wanting her attention, and politely smiles even when she’s uncomfortable.
Love. I think back to what Barrett suggested, and I wonder if perhaps she’s not starting to get under my skin in a way more than physical. I promised myself after my mom passed away I would never give my heart to someone else, but I never anticipated someone coming into my life like Lia. Stupidly I presumed everyone was like my father.
I think I was wrong.
I think I’m fucked.
AMELIA
Glancing around the room, I wonder where Tristan is. I’ve been covertly watching as he works the room, just like I do, but five minutes ago, I lost him in the throngs of people. If he’s in the shadows, he’s doing a very good job at hiding. Working the room, I keep my eyes open and alert as I watch for him. He’s the thing that keeps me grounded in this crazy electrical storm of a situation I’ve found myself in. I’m doing my best to give everyone my undivided attention when I see a nightmare brought to life—a boy I met when I was fifteen and rebelling against being the one chosen for Tristan.
I’m looking for a way out of this situation, desperately trying to find my center. My Tristan, but I can’t see him. I don’t even see Parker. My heart beats faster, and I do my best to try to get a conversation with someone else going. But it doesn’t work. Right now everyone has somewhere else they need to be. Right when I need someone, everyone is gone.
Callum Wright was the man who stole my heart, my first kiss, and smashed through my virginity, even when I wasn’t sure I wanted him to. I try to avoid him, but he’s heading toward me, and as he catches up, I have no place to go.
My pulse pounds, almost so fast it makes me dizzy. Can’t anyone see I don’t want to be here? Can’t anyone see how uncomfortable he makes me?
I know they don’t, because everyone thinks Callum Wright is the nicest of men. More women than me have to know he isn’t, but I know no one will speak up.
“Amelia.” He mock bows to me. Just the sound of my name on his lips makes my skin crawl. “How is the future Queen of Haldonia.”
“Looking for her king,” I quip, glancing around, hoping I see Tristan in the crowd somewhere. I desperately want to see him, need to have his strong presence beside me. His strength will hold me up when nothing else will. Please, I beg silently, please come to me.
He leans into me, and I can smell the alcohol on his breath. When I glance up, his eyes are glassy, meaning he’s probably done more than drink some alcohol. It’s well known in the circles he runs in that he can get anyone whatever they’d like to get their hands on. “I hear he’s a bore.”
My chin raises slightly, my jaw tightens. “He’s perfect for me.”
“Which makes sense, my dear, because you were a bore too.” He laughs cruelly.
I hate him.
With every beat of my pulsing heart. I hate him.
Tears prick, and I fight valiantly to keep them at bay. I refuse to let him see how his words have affected me. Instead I remind him of the day where he took what I didn’t want to give him, hoping it will make him ashamed of the man he was that day. “You didn’t seem to think so that day in the hayloft.”
His eyes burn, a smirk crosses his face. It’s so obvious he’s not ashamed of anything he’s ever done. It hurts me, maybe more now than it did then, because I know what it’s like to have the beautiful part of sharing your body with someone else. “At least one of us enjoyed ourselves.”
I fight to keep from flinching. “Must have been you, because I’ve had much better now.”
He doesn’t like what I said. His breathing quickens and he makes a sound in his throat. Maybe I’ve pushed too hard. Maybe I should have just kept quiet. The look on his face now is scary, and I find myself trying to retreat, but there’s really nowhere for me to go in this throng of people. Just as I’m about to fully panic, I feel a strong hand at my elbow.
“Is there a problem here?”
Tristan’s voice is the sweetest thing I’ve ever heard in my life.
“Yes,” I answer. “Yes, there is.”