9. 9
9
Hetti e
A ll the air is sucked out of the room with Tema’s question.
How did she know?
Abigail crowds in the doorway with us, clutching my arm. “We need to—”
I have no clue how to respond.
But Bo does. He manages to react before I can even begin to process what is happening.
“Yeah,” he says in that quiet way he has. And then he steps into the room, right where Tema is playing on the carpet, and settles on the floor beside her. He manages to fold his long, muscular body into a cross-legged position like he sits like that every day.
I don’t know. Maybe he does.
But I know he isn’t faced with a child he didn’t realize existed every day, and the ease with which he just admitted that is mindboggling.
Tema watches him sit down. I’ve been a mother long enough to understand that her comfort with the situation has everything to do with how Bo is reacting.
And me: only I’m not sure I’m handling it very well. Because I’m not handling anything, just watching it all unfold like I don’t have a vested interest in these two people meeting each other for the very first time.
“What are you making?” Bo gestures to the blocks in Tema’s hand.
“A boat.”
“Do you like boats?”
Tema cocks her head. “I feel like I should,” she admits, sounding older than her seven years. I may be biased, but I’ve always thought she is mature for her years. It might have something to do with being an only child, or I just might have an amazing kid on my hands.
I think both.
Bo doesn’t even blink at her reply. “Why’s that?”
“Mom says my grandpa has a fishing boat.”
Please, please please don’t mention her other grandpa is a king! I’m not sure who I’m silently asking this of. Maybe me?
“And we live near the ocean,” Tema continues, and I’m forever grateful my filter worked and I kept that inside. “I swim a lot.”
“Swimming is good. Boats are cool, too.”
Tema searches for another block as if this were an everyday occurrence for her. “I’d like to go out on one to see what it’s like.”
“Might be a little cold for that now. But sometimes you can see whales.”
“I like whales. Do you have polar bears?”
Bo nods. He still hasn’t looked at me for—what? Approval? Reassurance? He doesn’t need either, since he’s doing better than I am. I’m waiting for Tema to run screaming away from Bo.
I shouldn’t be, because Tema would never do that. My daughter is the bravest person I know .
“In the north.”
Tema’s eyes widen. “Have you ever seen one?”
“Couple of times. Big.” He points at Tema’s sweatshirt. “Did you see her in concert?”
“No,” Tema says scornfully. “Mom says I’m too young.”
“Maybe a little. You’ll see her next time she tours.”
Tema scoots closer to him. “Really?”
Bo shrugs. “We’ve been trying to get her to play here for a while.”
“That would be excellent . Are you really my dad?” She stares at him, not upset or confused, just curious. And she seems pretty cheerful about the conversation there on the floor.
He glances up at me and I shrug. I had no clue how it would be, telling my child about her father, but I have to say, it’s going much better than I expected. So much, so that I’m able to start breathing normally.
“Would that be okay if I was?” Bo asks her.
Tema laughs. She laughs. “You’re a prince, so yeah. You have a castle and a king for a dad and a—I’m sorry about the queen. I heard she died.”
“Tema—”
“Thank you,” Bo says gravely. “She did die. I miss her.”
And Tema, my brilliant, beautiful little girl, puts her little hand on Bo’s knee. “It’s hard to have only one parent when everyone else has two. Or three—my best friend Adam has a mother and a father and a step-father and they all live next door to each other.”
Bo smiles. “Sounds like it’s a good setup.”
“Do you live in the castle all the time?” she asks, pushing her pile of blocks closer to him. “Abigail showed it to me when we went to get coffee. She really likes coffee. Because maybe you could live next door to us in Victoria. Or would that be too hard if you’re a prince here?”
I can barely follow the conversation. My brain spins with the sight of Bo just sitting on the floor beside his daughter and how Tema has just accepted it. Him. This entire situation.
How can she be smiling about it when I’m completely freaking out?
Add in the crushing guilt and shame that I kept this from both of them, and I’m not in a good place right now. Plus—
I swipe my finger under my eye and it comes back wet. I’m crying. It’s too much. And Bo…
“I don’t live in the castle all the time,” he tells her, picking up a few LEGO pieces and pressing them together. “I live in the woods most of the time.”
“But you’re a prince, so you should—”
“He’s more than a prince, Tema,” I interrupt.
“But you are a prince, right? Does that mean I’m a princess?” She claps her hands. “I think it’d be fun to be a princess.”
“Sometimes it’s fun,” Bo agrees.
“He’s doing great,” Abigail whispers into my ear. “This is really good.”
Abigail is my best friend, but she never truly gave up her loyalty to Bo. She’s always been on my side but never fails to give me a reason or an excuse for Bo’s behaviour. Even after all these years, Abigail is convinced Bo had a good reason not to ask me to stay.
I need to tell her she’s been right this whole time.
I nod. “I didn’t know what to do. He wanted to meet her. How could I say no?”
“You couldn’t.” Abigail squeezes my shoulder. “You did the right thing. He’s a natural.”
How can Bo be a natural when he’s had only four hours to get used to the idea that he has a daughter?
“Do you think I’ll make a good princess?” Tema demands and my heart stops. My daughter is third in line for the throne of Laandia. She always has been, but it was easy to ignore the fact when Bo or the rest of the royal family didn’t know about her.
“Well.” Bo studies Tema, his head cocked to the side. “You like LEGO, and polar bears, and maybe boats. And Taylor Swift. Do you like to read?”
“Yes! I love to read. My favourite books are Junie. B. Jones now, but I have all the Fancy Nancy books. It’s quite the collection.”
My heart swells and Bo doesn’t even blink. “I don’t know who they are but it sounds really cool. I think if you like those things, then you’ll be a good princess.”
“Can we visit the castle?” Tema bubbles. “I want to meet the king.”
The king, her grandfather. I don’t think she’s really gotten the connection, but she’s seven. She’s doing better than I would under the circumstances. Than I am doing.
I still hold my breath at every question, wondering how Bo will react.
“Maybe we can ask your mom if you can stay there.” Bo turns and looks at me. He really is asking. He’s not about to pick up Tema and steal her away into the night, locking her up where I can’t get to her.
I never thought Bo would do that .
Only I did, because in my mind, Bo had changed so drastically, I never knew how he would react when I told him about Tema.
But now I see he’s still the Bo I used to love.
Used to. I repeat that to myself for good measure.
“Mommy!” Tema scrambles to her feet, little LEGO pieces falling as she dances over to me. “Can we go? Can we stay at the castle?”
I hiss under my breath. “Baby, can I talk to Prince Bo for a sec?”
“He’s my dad so I don’t think you have to call him ‘Prince’,” she says matter-of-factly.
Bo stands and his face is positively glowing. I know Tema’s easy he’s my dad is playing on repeat in his head.
“No. Well, let me talk to him for a minute. Why don’t you clean up your LEGO?” I motion to Bo to follow me into the kitchen.
“Do you want me to turn up the TV so I can’t hear your talking?” Tema calls after us.
Bo chuckles.
“That’d be great, thanks,” I say over my shoulder.
Abigail waits for us in the kitchen, arms crossed as she leans against the counter. And as soon as Bo steps in, she launches herself at him.
“I should be so mad at you, but I’m so happy to see you,” she says into his chest.
I wish I could hug him so easily.
Bo tightens his arms around her waist. “It’s good to see you, Abigail.” The tension from earlier has disappeared, his shoulders no longer fixed at his ears .
“It’s been a long time.” She pulls back and I notice her cheeks are damp like mine. When she came with me, Abigail left her family behind, but also her friends. Bo was her friend, too. And Spencer. She gave both of them up for me.
Bo nods with a hint of a smile hiding in his beard. “Thanks for helping Hettie with everything.”
“Of course.” Abigail turns to me, swiping at her cheeks. “That’s it? That’s the big reveal?”
I know how she feels. How can something that has caused so much concern and sleepless nights end up being so anti-climactic? Seeing Bo with Tema… seeing how Tema just took it all in stride… “I don’t know what to say,” I admit. “I didn’t expect—”
“It to ever happen?” His lips quirk. “She seems cool.”
“She is amazing,” Abigail emphasizes.
“Yeah, but you’ve spent her whole life with her. I want to get to know her.” He turns to me. “I’d like you to stay at the castle while we figure this out.”
My heart stops beating because this is when Bo takes her from me, using his royal power to take my daughter—
“Both of you. You’re welcome to stay at the castle as well.” He gives Abigail a sideways glance. “Since I bet I’m not going to be able to keep you away from her.”
“I’ve spent every day with her,” Abigail retorts. “I love her more than life itself.”
“I’m glad. But you say that like it’s my fault. I didn’t even know that kid existed until a couple of hours ago. Now I want to make up for lost time as quick as I can. ”
“You sent Hettie away,” Abigail points out before I can say anything. She’s always been my protector, but this is my fight. “That makes it your fault.”
“No, I actually didn’t.” Bo’s shoulders slump. “But I didn’t do anything to make her stay, either.” He glances at me. “Stay. At the castle.”
My heart stutters to a full stop at the word stay, but I don’t let on. “I wish you’d spoken to me first before you said anything to Tema. That’s a big part of parenting.”
“I wouldn’t know.”
He says that with no expression, like it’s not even a dig at me.
“But I’d like to,” he adds. “My father isn’t back until tomorrow morning. I’d like him to meet her.”
“Just like that? You’re not going to give him any warning?”
“I thought I’d talk to him first. This is something you do face-to-face. But why don’t you come with me and get settled?” Bo pauses, his gaze locked on mine. “Please.”