Chapter 49
FOUND OUT
ELOISE
London Daily Times
The Prince of Wales continues his tour of North America crossing province after province, meeting with service organizations, and talking to businesses. Canada is a large trading partner for the UK and it is his job to make inroads for the British government. So far, he appears to be doing well.
While we hate to call it and say the Prince is in the full swing of his redemption arc, we must hand it to the capable young Eloise Mills.
Not only has she survived as social secretary longer than we ever thought she would, palace insiders sing her praises.
They say she was hired because she was responsible for engineering the Prince’s comeback and that Her Majesty hand-picked the young woman for the job. We can hope he continues to behave.
By night I was the secret girlfriend. By day, I played the formidable assistant to one of the most visible men on earth, leaving no one the wiser.
No one knew about us. Or, so I thought. Duncan’s detail did, no doubt, but no one treated me differently.
We kept it professional. He was always deferential and respectful to me at work.
And after work, he was adoring and willing to do anything I asked.
We were in that very happy, sweet place at the start of a relationship where everything felt perfect and fuzzy.
The honeymoon phase was great. I got to be the target of Duncan’s fantasies, his ear to the ground, and his person to decompress with. What I expected was a fun fling that fizzled after a month. Instead, I got his utter devotion. And funnily enough, I didn’t see an end.
Then came the schedule’s most grueling part. Duncan and I had so much travel for two days, that we couldn’t connect. He whinged via adorable, passed notes. I luxuriated in those. It made it all a secret. We had this glorious little thing.
It was a blissful fantasy until it wasn’t.
Duncan visited my room while we were in Manitoba. Finally, we had time together. He snuck in late and climbed into bed, but wasn’t immediately coming onto me. And it wasn’t that he wanted me to take it out on him. No, it was something else. He was pensive.
“What’s going on? You’re being fucking weird, Duncan,” I said.
He let out a long sigh.
“Out with it, Duncan.”
I expected a playful “yes, mistress” or something. I got a bombshell.
“John knows. I confirmed it. I needed to tell you but there was no time, and I didn’t want to pass a note about it. He’s known a few days now. And… it is what it is. I didn’t want to hide it.”
My jaw dropped. “All this time? He’s said nothing.”
“I told him to let me tell you.”
“And your mother… oh my God, Duncan, she’s going to fire me!” My blood ran cold.
“No one is sacking you! Jesus, Ella. No!”
“But they must think I’m like some stupid bitch who is only—”
He put his hand on my waist protectively.
“Ella, stop. Please stop. No. John doesn’t think ill of you.
If anything, he thinks ill of me. And… yeah I am sure it is a little awkward operating as if we are a couple while very much not operating this way.
But, Eloise, I do think you need to panic. I knew you would.”
“Of course I would! I said we needed to get through the tour first! We’re only a third of the way through and everyone knows you’re just fucking me and—”
“Shhhh,” Duncan silenced me. “No one thinks that. And even if they did, I wouldn’t hear it. I am not just fucking you. I adore you. I wouldn’t have this if you weren’t here. I wouldn’t put up with it.”
“We are being filmed every day.”
“We get final say in what is released and Cressida is a family friend. I will not embarrass you. Do you trust me, Eloise?”
I shrugged. “As much as I can.”
He looked dissatisfied.
I rushed to explain. “Duncan, I have struggled to trust anyone in my life, okay? And I have valid fucking reasons. The Vincents are my only family as far as I am concerned—for a reason.”
“What, because you never let anyone in? It was sexy—it can be—but if this is to work, I need you to trust me and realize I am a person. You always see me as a person. Why can’t you trust I could be your person?”
I wasn’t sure how to respond, deflecting, “Duncan, you don’t mean that. You don’t mean your person. I’m a girl you’re having fun with. I am not the one you end up with. I’m not even girlfriend material.”
Wounded, he dropped my gaze.
The anger hit and he began to pack. “Eloise, that is so hurtful. Stop it!”
He left the bed and pulled on his jeans.
“Please, Duncan, I’m sorry. I don’t… I don’t know what to do here. I’m panicking and dodging and there is so much I should probably say but I don’t think you want to hear it.”
Duncan sighed, annoyed.
“Do you want to hear it? Because it’s a mess.”
He tossed his jeans down in sheer frustration and climbed into bed.
“I want to hear it. I want you to let me in. And I don’t want you to say I don’t believe you are my person.
Eloise, maybe you’re uncomfortable with being the girlfriend.
I know the timing is shit. But… I want this. When we get home, I want this.”
“It will destroy my career. Do not make me choose—”
“Why choose?” Duncan said. “Eloise, at the very least you could transition to something else. And even if you wanted to say fuck it and take some time off, I would support you. I would never let you want for anything.”
Yes, while we’re together. What about when you leave?
He had no idea how complicated my view of “trust” was—especially when it came to men. I hesitated, searching his face for a bit of security. By now, he calmed and was focused on me.
I spoke deliberately, “It is not that I don’t believe you care about me, Duncan.
I love the way you make me feel. It is heady and intoxicating.
You truly do worship me—something I never thought any man would do.
I love it. But… that sort of thing can blind you to reality. I am not princess material, Duncan.”
“I vehemently disagree. Also, I’m edging on forty, have never been married, and have had a live-in girlfriend before.
If you are worried about pearl-clutching over me paying some of your bills, you are delusional.
This is not 1950. I do not care what people think.
People will think the world of you, darling. ”
“I want to believe you, but… you don’t know anything about my life before we met. I think you would feel differently.”
“How would you know if you never let me in? You can care about me despite all my foibles. You can look past that? Do you think I am so shallow I would cast you aside over your past? Eloise, you’re twenty-five, accomplished, and well-spoken. How bad could it really be?”
I knew I should have left it. He looked so earnest. He did care.
I had to trust him, or this was pointless.
He trusted me with everything, but Duncan was a romantic.
I knew that more than ever. I never had a grownup relationship and was never convinced by such things.
While I worried about my career, I feared losing this vulnerable moment and connection.
His heart was on his sleeve. It was time to unload and hope for the best.