Chapter 23 Livy
LIVY
Sebastian’s fingers leave faint streaks of mostly dried blood across my forearm. He’s holding onto me like he thinks I’ll float away if he lets go. As he pulls me through the Ruck House, my shorter legs struggle to keep up with his pace.
At first, I think he’s going to take me to his bedroom so we can talk about…everything, I guess? Instead, he pulls me in front of him, slows his pace, and walks much more slowly down the hallway. He’s already shutting the door behind us when I realize we’re in a private bathroom.
The lock clicks.
I lean back against the door, trying to steady my breathing. The quiet in here feels strange after everything we’ve been through tonight. The adrenaline is finally leaving my body, and I’m starting to feel the ache around my neck where Nathan tried to strangle me.
Sebastian is already at the sink, turning the water on and bracing his hands on the counter. Blood runs over his knuckles when the water hits them, swirling pink down the drain. When he splashes his face, he hisses softly as the water touches his busted lip.
“I didn’t realize that fucker got a hit in,” he says with a chuckle, but there’s a sadness in his voice that pulls at my heart.
I told him everything Nathan said to me during the attack, and Sebastian said he would have some people he knows check everything out.
There’s a chance Nathan was lying, but I don’t think so.
It’ll take a long time to process everything, but I’m grateful tonight ended the way it did.
“You should sit,” I say, walking closer to him. His back looks massive as he leans forward to wash his face again.
I grab some paper towels anyway, running them under the faucet before stepping closer.
“Hold still,” I tell him, because I can’t stand looking at his busted knuckles like this. His eyes flick up to mine in the mirror. Something dark lives in them tonight, like he’s tired of waiting to finally claim what is so rightfully his.
I breathe in, shifting closer to him. I want him so much, even with everything that happened tonight. Actually, especially after what we’ve been through.
Sebastian turns toward me and lets me clean the blood off his hands gently with soap and warm water.
“You’re going to need ice,” I murmur. I don’t love the fact that he’s hurt, but I have to admit I like taking care of him like this. I suspect he’s not used to such a gentle touch by the way he’s shifting closer to me.
“I just need you, baby,” he murmurs as I wipe the last streak of red from his skin and toss the paper towels into the trash can.
For a moment we’re both quiet, but I can feel his eyes on my face.
Then I look up at him and say, “You said I’ve been it for you for a decade. I’d really like to know what you meant by that.”
Sebastian simply nods once and pushes away from the counter.
The movement is slow and deliberate, almost predatory.
Instinctively, I shift backward until my back presses against the door. Sebastian advances, his large frame closing the distance between us until there’s nowhere left for me to move. His big hands brace against the wall on either side of my head, caging me in completely.
I can feel the warmth of his body seeping into mine, and suddenly I’m thankful I have this little dress on because I feel all of him.
“Everyone who should have kept you safe failed,” he says quietly, and his eyes search mine.
“Let me take care of you, songbird.” My breath catches because the nickname tickles something in the back of my mind.
I don’t get to finish my thought because he’s speaking again.
“It is, without question, the reason I exist.”
My chest tightens so suddenly I have to look away from him for a second, but he cups my jaw gently and guides me to look at him. “Why?” I ask softly.
He moves his hand to brush my hair out of my eyes before he says, “Because when I was ten-years-old I met a girl who had the most beautiful voice. I held her while her parents were being murdered, and then she was ripped away from me. I have spent my life writing her letters with nowhere to send them, recording tape after tape, hoping one day I could tell her what she meant to me.”
My heart stutters because everything he’s describing comes flooding back from recesses of my mind that I sealed off so long ago. I gasp, but no words come out.
But that’s okay, because Sebastian has more to say, and I feel like I could listen to him tell our story forever. “That girl, the one who has never left my mind for a single second, gave me something to remember her by before the police took her away.”
My hands fly to his face before I can stop them because I remember. I remember his eyes. I remember looking into his eyes ten years ago and being so scared, but grateful that he was with me. “No freaking way,” I whisper.
His mouth curves slightly when he lowers his voice to match mine. “You remember.”
“You were the boy who hid me,” I say, and I don’t have much else because I’m still studying his face.
It’s really him.
“I was,” he says, reaching into his pocket and pulling out the pink scrunchie I was wearing that day. It has tiny white hearts on it. I wore that thing no matter what color outfit I was wearing because it was my favorite.
“I can’t believe you kept it all these years,” I say, running my fingers over the worn fabric.
He tucks it away, and then his arms wrap around my waist instantly, pulling me against him like he just needs to be closer.
“I searched for you every day after that,” he says, and there’s absolutely no hesitation in his voice. “I went back to your old town. I talked to anyone who might have known where you went. Foster agencies. School records. Private investigators.”
I stare up at him. “Sebastian…”
“I chased every lead I could find,” he continues quietly. “Most of them went nowhere.” His thumb brushes along my cheekbone, and I smile at him because I think it’s cute how he needs to be touching me in some way.
“How did you find me?” I ask. It probably doesn’t really matter, but I’d like to know.
“A friend of mine, Caiden Grey, has deep connections all over the place and was able to track you to St. Killian. He also saw that someone else was trying to get intel on you.” Sebastian’s mouth pulls tight.
“I’ll know more tomorrow, but I assume that was Nathan.
Anyway, as soon as I knew your location, I packed a bag and caught the next flight. ”
Emotion rises in my chest so quickly it almost hurts. “You came here just to find me? That was the only reason?”
“I came here because you belong to me,” he says simply. “I have every letter, every tape, every single thought I recorded about you in storage back in my hometown, and I can’t wait to take you there one day.”
“Tristan said we shouldn’t visit,” I say cheekily, and that makes Sebastian frown.
“I’m going to have to beat his ass now, and I hope you know that,” he admonishes me, but he’s touching my face and neck so tenderly, I know he doesn’t mean it.
A surprised laugh escapes me before I can stop it. After everything that’s happened tonight, the sound feels strange coming out of my mouth. Sebastian watches me like the laugh is the best thing he’s heard in his life.
Then his mouth lowers to mine.
The kiss is slow and unhurried.
He brushes his lips against mine once, twice, like he’s savoring the feeling. His hands move through my hair, down my back, across my waist.
He kisses me again, deeper now, and I melt into him without thinking.
“I’ve wanted this for so long,” he murmurs between kisses.
My fingers slide into the back of his hair.
“You’re intense,” I whisper. “I love it.”
“You have no idea, baby. But I’m going to show you tonight.”
Before I can respond, his hands move to my hips, and he lifts me effortlessly. My legs wrap instinctively around his waist.
His forehead rests briefly against mine.
“I mean what I said,” he says quietly. “You’re going to live with me. First here, starting tonight. I’ll have your things moved tomorrow. Then we’ll find a place wherever you want. Anything you want.”
I open my mouth, and I’m not even going to protest. After tonight, I don’t want to be away from Sebastian. I want to be with him as much as possible. We have so much catching up to do, and I don't want to waste another second.
I don’t get a chance to say any of that because he’s still pleading his case. “I’m not sleeping away from you,” he continues. “Now that you know everything, there’s no reason for us to be apart.”
His hand slides up to cradle the back of my head when he says, “I simply do not wish to be away from you for any reason. And I need to be close to you all the time.”
Something in the way he says the words makes my stomach flip.
My fingers curl into the front of his shirt, tugging him closer.
“How close?” I ask quietly.
The corner of his mouth lifts. “I need to be inside of you, baby.” His fingers hook into the hem of my dress, and when his eyes flick up to mine in silent question, I lift my arms.
I’m ready for this. I’m ready for him.
I expect him to undress me. I expect him to work as fast as he can until we’re both naked because he’s looking at me like he’s been starving for this moment.
But he doesn’t take my dress off. Instead, he lets his hands wander over every contour of my body.
“You’re finally here,” he murmurs like he can’t believe it.
His hands move to my waist again, pulling me close enough that I can feel the steady rise and fall of his chest.
“With me,” he finishes his thought just as his mouth finds my neck.
The first kiss is slow, almost careful, but the second one lingers longer, his lips pressing against the sensitive skin just below my ear. I can tell he’s trying to be mindful of how I was hurt tonight.
A shiver runs straight down my spine because right now with Sebastian’s hands and mouth on me, I don’t feel an ounce of pain.
“I’m going to be as gentle as I can with you, baby, but I feel like I need to apologize in advance for when I lose control. I’m barely hanging on, and I’ve only kissed your neck,” he says against my skin.
I drag my fingernails lightly down his biceps, and he lets out a low moan of pleasure. Sebastian’s mouth moves lower, brushing my collarbone with another lingering kiss.
“You’re finally mine,” he whispers so softly I’m not sure if he’s speaking to me or reassuring himself.
BANG. BANG. BANG.
Sebastian groans softly against my throat. His mouth presses one last kiss to the column of my neck before he pulls back.
“Whoever that is, I’m gonna fucking kill you,” he mutters.
Another loud bang rattles the door.
“Seriously! Hurry up man, my friend is puking all over the fucking house.” I don’t recognize the guy’s voice, but I can only assume it’s one of the guys on Sebastian’s team.
Sebastian checks my dress over to make sure I’m covered and then cups my face, kissing me roughly one more time like he’s making up for the interruption.
When he pulls back, his forehead rests briefly against mine. “Come with me, baby.”
My heart skips when he adds, “I want to take you somewhere.” His eyes search mine carefully, and I can hear the pleasure in his voice when he says, “You trust me. I can see it. Say it. I want to hear you say it.”
My hands slide up to cradle his face. “I trust you, Sebastian,” I tell him quietly. “You’re the only one I trust.”
His throat moves as he visibly swallows. “That’s my good fucking girl,” he practically moans the words. My body is responding to him, and I can tell by the way his fingers flex against my sides, he’s ready for me.
I hold his gaze when I say, “It’s only you, Sebastian. You’re the only one for me. I feel it. Everything you’ve said tonight, I feel it too.”
His breath catches, then he dips his head and kisses me again.
Soft.
Slow.
When he pulls away, he suddenly scoops me up and shifts me over his shoulder. His hand and forearm are in the perfect spot on my ass when he squeezes hard.
“Sebastian!” I squeal, half laughing.