Chapter 22
22
EMMA
I knew he’d rescue me.
No man had ever defended my honor before, but the second that drunk guy blocked my way, I’d known Johnny would show up and fix it.
What I hadn’t known–but maybe should have–was how scary he’d look while doing it. He was mad. His eyes had a crazy glint, his teeth were bared, and he hadn’t stopped to see if I was okay after he threw the guy.
“You don’t fucking touch her,” he growled, even though the guy was ten feet away from me now. Ten feet.
I was rooted to the spot. Stunned. A little freaked out, but I was trying to process what I was seeing. Johnny going completely ape shit .
He stalked after him, who was scrambling up on the other side of the gated area that housed the mechanical bull.
“Johnny, no! Stop him ,” I heard one of the ranch guys yell.
That was my clue-in. What reminded me of his story with his sister–how he said he’d taken things too far. I also remembered the grief he had over what he’d done.
I needed to stop him before he did something he regretted again. I didn’t like a drunk guy hitting on me, crowding me, and not grasping the word no , but I was in a public space. The girls were there. So were the Wolf Ranch guys. Cody, the bar owner, too. A roomful of non-drunk, not-jerky guys to help. I could’ve screamed. I’d been a little angry and a little scared, but I hadn’t really been in danger.
Except it didn’t seem like Johnny saw it that way.
Clint shoved his way forward. The other ranch guys were all pushing through the growing crowd, too.
“Are you okay? Are you hurt?” Willow came up to me and eyed me closely.
I shook my head and followed Johnny, also trying to push my way through the close-knit crowd to get to him.
Was there going to be a brawl? The drunk guy’s friends were shouting now, and one of them threw a punch at Johnny. I swear to God, it bounced right off his muscled abs like he hadn’t felt a thing. He just kept stalking toward my attacker. The guy had picked himself up from the floor, but he was staggering, like he didn’t know what had happened.
Johnny leaped through the air– more than five feet –and tackled the guy again. They both went down to the floor, rolling.
Colton and Clint finally caught up. Johnny drew his arm back to punch the guy, but before he could swing, his friends hauled him off.
“Get him back. Get him out of here.” Rob snapped. He was right behind the other guys.
I didn’t like the way they were strong-arming Johnny. I knew they were his friends and were doing it for his own good, but I didn’t like that he had to struggle against their hold.
“He hurt her,” Johnny snarled. “He was going to–”
I threw myself in front of him, my hands on his chiseled chest. “I’m okay.” I tried to catch his eyes. They looked wild, the irises glinting almost yellow instead of brown, and his teeth were clenched.
“ Johnny ,” I said again, this time more forcefully.
His gaze jerked to mine.
I reached for his face and held it between my palms. His skin was hot. Sweaty. “Johnny, I’m not hurt. You stopped him. It’s okay.”
He went still. “Lyssa? ”
I never hated hearing my sister’s name on his lips more. I really wanted it to be me he was looking at with one part desperation, one part relief.
“You lost it, kid. You just caused a world of problems,” Rob said sharply. “Instead of looking after your m–female, you were out for blood.”
I wanted to tell Rob to shut up. To stop lecturing Johnny.
But it was okay because Johnny only had eyes for me. “Fuck, Lyssa. I’m sorry.”
His buddies released him, no doubt realizing he was back in control. Beyond the tight circle they made, the drunk guy and his friends were still trying to fight, but the Wolf Ranch guys ignored them.
Johnny swung me up into his arms, lifting me into a honeymoon carry.
“Yeah, get her out of here,” Rob said.
Johnny was already moving, like he needed to get me out of there before the place exploded. “Lyssa…I–I lost control again. I left you standing there.”
“You have me now,” I murmured.
The crowd parted for us, whispering and watching. Some slapped Johnny on the back, some called him asshole and other names. He ignored them all and carried me outside and directly to his truck. There, he set me down by the passenger door. “Lyssa…” He stroked hi s hands down my arms then held the one the guy had grabbed and examined the finger marks he had left.
His face turned murderous again and an eerie growl came from his throat.
“I’m okay,” I said firmly.
Some of the drunk guy’s friends came spilling out the front door, shouting at us. “We’re gonna kill you for that!” one of them yelled.
My heart pounded, but I was careful not to show fear. I didn’t want Johnny to get back in another fight over me. “Take me home,” I pleaded, wanting nothing more than to get the hell away from here.
He glanced over his shoulder at the assholes approaching, his brows down.
Willow had come out, followed by the Wolf Ranch guys, and she was talking the other gang down. “That’s enough, boys. It’s time for everyone to go home,” she said in a calm, authoritative voice.
Johnny looked back at me. Pain etched his expression. Haunted his eyes. “You don’t mean home -home, do you?”
Oh God. I remembered how he’d been kicked out after he’d rescued his sister. Did he think I wanted to leave him? To break up with him?
And wow, was I already considering this a relationship that could be broken up ?
Yeah, I guessed I was. Sometime in the last twenty-four hours, we had crossed over from fling to forever .
Voices were still raised behind us. I wanted to get out of here before anything more happened. We needed to de-escalate things. Calm Johnny down. Get him to see I was fine. That it was a stupid, drunk guy being stupid. Nothing more.
“I mean home to Wolf Ranch. With you,” I clarified, trying to sound earnest, so he knew it was the truth. After all the fibs, I said the one thing I believed down to my… heart. “I want to be with you.”
He stood there, frozen as the raised voices drew closer. His breath came out in an exhale. His face crumpled, pain etching harsh lines into his skin. “You do?”
I nodded.
His gaze raked over me, but not in the heated way it had earlier. “You’re okay? I mean…not from what he did, but…”
Willow and Rob were putting their bodies between ours and the drunk guy’s friends.
“Let’s get in the truck, Johnny,” I urged.
He blinked, seeming to realize what was happening behind him. “Yeah. Okay.” He opened my door and lifted me inside, taking the time to fasten my seatbelt.
I braced for trouble as he shut my door to go around the truck, but he didn’t even spare the rabble rousers a glance. I watched in the rearview mirror as he walked around, his brows down, his gaze lowered like he was thinking hard.
He shut his door and started the truck. When we were out on the single-lane highway, he started “Are you okay with what…you saw? With me?”
I reached for his hand and curved my fingers around his, setting them on my thigh. “I’m not scared of you,” I answered.
He frowned at the road in front of us, still troubled. “I could’ve gone too far again tonight. Fuck!” He smacked his hand down on the dashboard.
I jumped but remained calm. He wouldn’t hurt me. “You didn’t, though. Everything is okay.”
He shot a glance at me then looked back at the road. “You’re not…done with me?” His voice broke a little on the word done.
“I’m not done.” My voice was low and quiet. Like a solemn swearing. I found his hand again and squeezed his fingers, so he could be reminded of our connection. I couldn’t climb into his lap and reassure him while he was driving, so this was all I could do.
Johnny blinked rapidly, and his chest filled abruptly with air, which he held a moment before letting it slowly out. “Fuck, Lyssa. I’m sorry I ruined our night.”
Was it wrong that I didn’t think it was ruined? I didn’t want to praise or thank him for getting violent because he definitely did seem to have a problem, but I wouldn’t give up this moment for anything.
This closeness. The raw exposure of one heart to another.
I had to ask. “Johnny, when you said you went too far last time…”
An oncoming car’s headlights cast harsh light over his face, and I could see that the quick glance he gave me held alarm again. Oh crap.
He hurt the person who attacked his sister. The way he was eyeing me, probably even worse.
My heart sank. It was as bad as I suspected. Could I live with that? A guy who didn’t know his own strength when he was protecting someone he loved?
Yeah, I could.
Because of his regret. Because he showed the capacity to change and the desire to heal.
“Did he die?” I brought myself to ask. Because maybe it would help if the trauma was just aired out. Not crouching behind the door like a monster.
“Yeah.” Johnny’s voice was rough. “He almost raped my sister. Attacked her. Ripped off her clothes before I got to her. I didn’t mean to kill him, but he fought hard, and he didn’t hold back. I wasn’t just going to let him go for what he did to her, but it turned into a kill or be killed situation. ”
I nodded and squeezed his hand. I could only imagine what it had been like.
“I love you.”
I didn’t mean to say it. It wasn’t even an appropriate moment. But those were the words that slipped out. The only offering I could think of that matched the enormity of what he’d shared with me.
What I meant was I am here with you.
I see you.
I’m not judging.
I won’t reject you.
“Yeah?” The word exploded out of Johnny, and when he looked over, his eyes were bright again, glinting yellow-orange in the darkness.
“I mean–I didn’t mean…”
“Don’t you dare take it back.”
I let out a relieved laugh. “Okay. I won’t, then.” God, my heart felt so full my chest could barely contain it. “It’s just… fast. Too quick, maybe.”
“Don’t take it back. I know, like you said, it seems fast, but Lyssa, I felt something special the moment I met you. I knew you were the one. Can you believe that?”
I gulped in my breath. My eyes watered.
I’d never imagined someone might say I was the one.
God, my whole life I’ve been the other one.
Johnny wanted me. Emma.
At least, I thought he wanted me .
What if what he really wanted was the Lyssa-version of me? Not the real me at all. What if he was disappointed when he found out I was boring old Emma? Nobody interesting at all?
I shoved those thoughts from my mind and met Johnny’s gaze. “I believe it,” I whispered, because it was almost true.
I wanted it to be true.
That was enough, right?