Chapter 4 #2
My breath caught in my throat and I would have fallen flat on my face if his hand weren’t still on my throat and I hadn’t reached out to grab ahold of his arms after that declaration that made my brain blue screen.
Nate grabbed my fists and eased me back down onto the mattress, pinning my hands above my head, and set a punishing pace as he pounded into me over and over. My fists twisted in the sheets, needing to hold on to something as he plundered away at my hole, making me cry out with each stroke.
But he refused to hit my prostate. He was making me pay for my impatience and it made me want to weep. I was so hard and I couldn’t find any relief for my aching cock as he held me in place, leaving me unable to fall and grind against the bed.
“Please, please let me come.” I was a begging mess, willing to sell my soul for release.
He didn’t say anything and I thought he was going to continue to ignore my pleas. But then the angle changed, just ever so slightly, and he was pegging my prostate over and over.
“Fuck! Oh, oh, fuuuuck, yes.” Tears streamed down my face as frustration and relief intermingled. “Please, oh God, Nate, please.”
Nate leaned over me, bracing his arms on either side of me, and swiped his tongue over my neck. One of his arms snaked around my neck and he pulled us up so we were both kneeling.
“Beg again for me, little bird.”
My head lolled back against his shoulder as my body had gone boneless. “Please. Fuck, Nate—”
“No.”
I went rigid and blinked, trying to figure out what it was he wanted. He wanted me to beg, which was what I had been doing.
“Nate—”
“No.” He cut me off again when I said his name, and it clicked, causing my cheeks to flame.
Daddy.
I glanced up at him from where my head rested on his shoulder and the look on his face told me he was serious. Fuck. Could I call another man Daddy? That had never been my thing, but I couldn’t deny that the thought of calling him Daddy turned me on.
A shiver ran down my spine as I realized I wanted nothing more than to be soooo good for him. To give up the control I needed in my every day life and trust him to take care of me.
To make me fall apart and put me back together even better than I was before he touched me.
“Please, Daddy… let me come.” My voice was low, barely more than a whisper, but the way he smiled at me as he bent his head and gave me a soft kiss made me soar.
“Fly for me. Fly so high for me, little bird. Higher than ever before,” he whispered as he wrapped his arm around my throat and squeezed.
His words triggered my climax and my load shot out of me so hard and far that I thought I was going to pass out. It took a few seconds for me to realize the spots dancing behind my eyes were because I couldn’t breathe. My hands reached up and tapped Nate’s arm.
I could hear him behind me as he pistoned into my ass and the low groan he let out as the muscles in his arm tightened, marked his release.
“Fuck, Aiden,” he groaned out.
For a moment, I didn’t move, wanting to give him a second to get his bearings and come down and let me go.
But he didn’t let go. I gasped his name and wrapped my hands around Nate’s arm, trying to pull him off when he continued to squeeze. The most embarrassing thing about that moment was the way my cock let out another jet of cum.
Nate immediately let go and I fell down onto the bed, landing in the mess I had made as I wasn’t able to brace myself.
Stunned, I lay there while he held my hips and slowly pulled himself out.
I wasn’t sure where he went, but I felt the bed move and it took a moment before I realized he’d gone to the bathroom when I heard the sink turn on.
I moved my head so I was facing the opposite direction, not wanting him to see the angry and embarrassed tears that streamed down my face.
Sex had never been like that for me and I wasn’t sure I had liked it.
Except, I couldn’t fool either one of us because we both knew how hard I came—untouched—and that I’d come again when he choked me.
When the warm cloth unexpectedly touched my used and abused ass, I let out a hiss.
“Sorry,” he murmured, but I couldn’t tell if he really meant it or not. Or what exactly he was apologizing for—there were a few things that immediately came to mind. He didn’t stop wiping down my ass and thighs, though, tapping my hip when he wanted me to turn over so he could clean my front.
Which just added to my embarrassment even more. I’d never had a guy stop and clean me up after we had sex. Not even boyfriends ever took the time to take that step for me.
It immediately made me think of him as Daddy and an irrational spike of anger shot through me. Then again, maybe it wasn’t so irrational.
“I can do that myself,” I snarked and he looked up at me in surprise, his brown eyes wide but unreadable.
“Oh,” he said, dropping the washcloth on the bed.
He stood there as we stared at each other, and I was unsure what I should do or say. Part of me felt stupid, but then another part of me reminded me that I had felt something uneasy in him from the beginning. And it wasn’t as though the sex was bad. It was great.
I didn’t know why I was mad. Except maybe I was mad at myself because I liked when he choked me.
Not to mention the whole Daddy thing. But I wasn’t sure if that was real or just a power move.
Maybe I was just mad he hadn’t discussed any of it prior to us having sex.
I wasn’t one to kink shame, but I also thought you should have an open dialogue with a partner before unleashing something like that.
Particularly something as dangerous as choking.
Nate tore his eyes away from mine and rubbed the back of his neck.
“Ummm. Sorry. I can…I can go, if you want. I’d understand.”
My eyes tracked Nate’s movements as he picked up his discarded suit and started to haphazardly pull it on. I let out a sigh.
“Don’t be stupid,” I muttered as I swung my legs off the side of the bed.
I wasn’t sure what came over me, but I had a sudden pang of need for the mystifying man in front of me. Something that told me I didn’t want to let him go. But that was silly because it was only a one-night stand. I had to let him go eventually.
Right?
He looked up at me like he wasn’t sure if he could trust my words, which I didn’t want to analyze the irony at the moment. So I stood up and reached my hand out to him and tugged him along to the bathroom. We could both use a shower and I was running on pure instinct.
I had a feeling he didn’t want to leave just as much as I didn’t want him to leave. And that was something I could work with.
Once the water got warm, I urged him to get in the shower and then I got in behind him and grabbed the soap and started to wash him.
“I…umm…you don’t have to do that.” The tentative tone in his voice made me pause and I wondered if he didn’t like it or perhaps he just wasn’t used to someone taking care of him.
“What if I want to?” I asked, trying to sound as nonchalant as possible.
His breathing picked up, but only slightly, before he turned to face me. I wasn’t sure what he was looking for as he searched my eyes for the answer to his unasked question.
“Nate,” I said softly.
He hummed. “Why do you call me that?”
I pulled back from him, my eyes furrowed.
“I…I’m not sure. Do you not like it?” The more I thought about it, after he asked, I realized he’d introduced himself as Nathan and I just jumped right into calling him Nate, not even bothering to find out what he preferred to be called. “I’m sorry. I don’t have to—”
His lips cut me off, stopping me mid-ramble, for which I was grateful.
“I like it coming from you. Or Daddy.” He looked away, the words so low I almost didn’t hear them. “Which is weird, because normally I don’t like nicknames.”
I ignored the Daddy thing for the moment and smirked. “Really? I wouldn’t have guessed from the way you keep calling me little bird.”
Nate scoffed. “That’s different.”
“How so?” I asked, laughing at his ridiculousness. “It’s still a nickname.”
He crossed his big, bulky arms over his chest and tried to level me with an intimidating glare. But it wasn’t working.
“It just is.” And with that, he turned back around and moved under the spray to wet his hair, effectively ending the conversation.
I rolled my eyes and grabbed the shampoo left out by housekeeping and reached up to massage it into his scalp. He let out a low groan that had my dick twitching. Once he had the shampoo rinsed out, I concentrated on lathering up the bodywash and spreading it all over his body.
When I was done, he maneuvered me so we switched places and he gave me the same treatment.
“How did you get these?” he asked quietly, running his hand up my left side again.
I went still and tried to move away, but there was nowhere for me to go—not in the small confines of the hotel shower.
“Don’t,” I said, voice stern as I pushed his hand away. “It was something that happened a long time ago. I don’t even really remember it. And I definitely don’t talk about it, or think about it.”
My head turned away. It was the only way I had to hide in the small space. I refused to feel like a victim when I was with him. I wasn’t that lost boy anymore, no matter how fucked up my brain and body still were.
“Don’t,” I repeated softly.
Nate just stared at me for a moment, as though trying to figure out what to say to my mini outburst. I didn’t think he was going to say anything else on the subject, as he turned off the water and grabbed a towel to dry me off.
When we were dry, he led me back to the bed, where he stripped the dirty sheets and got out the extra linens from the closet to remake the bed.
“You shouldn’t hide yourself. There’s nothing to be ashamed of. We all have our scars. Some are just more visible than others. Do you know what scars are?” he asked as he got into bed behind me, pulling me flush against his chest.
I shook my head.
He kissed the spot right behind my ear before whispering, “They’re a reminder you survived, little bird.”