Chapter 27
NATHAN
Ishouldn’t have stormed out of that meeting. But the last thing I had expected was to be confronted with Aiden and his partner.
Fucking hell.
Then again, maybe I should have. Christian had said they had left him a couple of messages and they knew where he worked.
While the investigation was ongoing, I should have distanced myself from Star Bird, with Christian being the one who discovered my latest victim. But I had been so sure that things had been going my way.
Hubris. That was how most serial killers were caught.
It was how I found myself sneaking out the side door of my office while my project manager was being confronted by my boyfriend, by my little bird, about the murder I’d committed. Despite wanting to know what Christian had told them, I couldn’t stick around and find out, so I got out of there.
Even if it was a dick move to leave him alone with the wolves.
And now, my wolf would be hounding me about my connection to Christian. To the victim.
It was all closing in. Crumbling.
I let out a bitter laugh as I marched toward my car, not caring who might be around in the underground garage to witness me spiral.
While I knew I was being childish and reckless, I couldn’t seem to stop myself from wanting to lash out.
I needed to channel everything that threatened to consume me. Even if it exposed me.
Ask me if I cared.
With a swift motion, I yanked my tie from around my neck and undid my cufflinks, stuffing them in my coat pocket so I could roll up my sleeves. I felt itchy, constricted, out of control.
I knew what I needed, but I had promised myself I would be better for Aiden. That I would be the man he needed me to be. Apparently, I couldn’t even go a week being that man.
“Nathan!” Christian called to me from across the garage, but I ignored him as I unlocked my car. There was nothing he could do or say that could help or soothe me. The monster that lived under my skin was too close to the surface. It needed to be unleashed.
Bad things happened when I ignored the monster and I couldn’t let that happen, not now that I had found my little bird.
The urge to kill was like a living thing crawling under my skin. If I didn’t give in, then things would be bad. That was the last thing I needed. I didn’t need Aiden becoming collateral damage to my urges. And I knew what would happen if I kept ignoring what was inside of me.
I’d only done it once, shortly after my parents died. I tried to contain it, to hold it at bay. Then I blacked out and woke up fourteen hours later with a body count of over a dozen. I’d been drenched in blood from head to toe as if I’d bathed in it, at some cabin in the middle of nowhere.
Every day I still wondered if someone would knock on my door looking to lock me up for what I did that night. But no one ever did.
The alternative would be forcing Aiden’s hand to put me down. And I didn’t want to do that to him either.
Christian came up from behind me, a dangerous move, and slammed his hand against the door of my car, just as I started to open it.
“Jesus fuck, Nathan. What are you doing?” He sounded out of breath and I wondered just how fast he’d had to run to catch up to me. Or how out of shape he was. It would make him easy prey.
No. He is my friend, not prey.
Unless he got in my way.
“Let me go, Christian,” I growled as I turned to face him, ready to push him away so I could get in the car and disappear.
Was that what I was going to do? Disappear?
“You’re not thinking clearly.” I let out a huff and turned away, not willing to let him see any vulnerability. “I didn’t say anything. Just gave them O’Keefe’s card and told them anything further would have to go through him.”
That was smart. And probably what we should have done from the start. But I hadn’t expected a witness, let alone one I planned on leaving alive.
“Doesn’t matter. He’s connected us now. It’s over.” It almost felt like a weight being lifted off my shoulder. Every day it had gotten harder to lie to him. I hadn’t anticipated that.
“Don’t do anything stupid, man.” Christian gave me a look, knowing full well I must have already planned on doing something stupid.
I threw him a grin. “Does that sound like me?”
He huffed out a laugh. “Normally? No. Lately? Yes.”
Unfortunately, he wasn’t far from the truth. “I just have some loose ends to tie up. And then I’ll let you know what’s up.”
That was probably a lie. If I disappeared, we both knew it would be best if he had no idea where I was going, or that I’d even left. But I knew the lie would make him feel better, at least for a moment.
After an awkward moment of silence passed between us, he gave me a fist bump and I slid into the driver’s seat of my car and peeled out of the garage. I needed to get to Clint and take care of him. He needed to go. Once I purged the desire for his blood, then I’d be okay for a little while.
Maybe I could come up with some believable lie to keep Aiden off my tail for a while. Then when I could work on trying to go longer between kills.
But I knew it was a lie. I’d never be able to, never be able to do it except how I’d always done it. Especially if I didn’t want to risk my little bird.
I’d kill Clint, then go back to Aiden, and everything would be fine.
For the moment.
As I drove to Clint’s house, I went back and forth on whether I should go back to Aiden or run. But I knew if I immediately ran, he would know I was guilty. There would be no coming back from that, no making him listen.
I let out a growl as I sped through the streets and stopped a little ways from Clint’s house. There was a light on, so I knew he was home. Not that I didn’t already know he’d be there. That was the point of stalking and finding out everything I could about my victims.
My thoughts raced, and I knew I was spiraling.
I needed to calm myself. But the only way I could do that was by having someone at the end of my blade.
As much as I hated it, having Aiden at the end of my cock only did so much.
He could only sate my hunger for so long before the need to kill became overwhelming.
I sat and watched, waiting for the moment my prey left his house so I could grab him.
An hour had passed when my phone rang. I glanced down, my heart squeezing as I knew there would only be one person it could be. Unable to deal with him at the moment, I let his call go to voicemail.
And the next.
And the next.
The slew of text messages with previews asking where I was and what I was doing, or saying that we needed to talk, all went unread and unanswered.
My mind was a mess and I couldn’t untangle the web of emotions I had become since I had met Aiden. In so many ways, my life had become so enriched with meaning. But in others, he was my downfall.
I shook my head, needing to clear my head. Murder required concentration and focus, otherwise mistakes were made.
With a glance at the time, I was surprised to realize several hours had passed since Aiden’s first call.
It was almost time for Clint to be getting ready to leave any minute.
Not wanting to miss my opportunity, I got out of the car, hands in my pockets, and made my way down the broken sidewalk and past the vacant houses and those I knew had residents who wouldn’t want to notice what was going on around them.
That was one of the good things about the neighborhood Clint lived in. No one saw anything. Ever. Even if they did, they didn’t.
Just as I got to the front of the house, there was movement in the front window. I slowed my pace to give Clint time to get out so I could grab him. Thankfully, I didn’t have long to wait as he scrambled out a minute later.
I pulled out my phone and pretended to be preoccupied, so we bumped into each other when he got to the sidewalk.
“Sorry, dude,” I offered, giving him a crooked smile. He looked taken aback and tried to take a step away, but I clutched the needle in my fingers, brought my arm around his neck in a friendly gesture, and let the needle slide into his skin, easy like butter.
Clint’s eyes went wide, and he pushed me away right before he started to lose his balance.
I grabbed him to keep him upright and laughed like we were old friends.
Acting like I was his buddy and I was there to help him made things less suspicious.
Made me less memorable. He clutched at me and tried to swat me away, but I paid no mind.
We walked to the car, and I got him seated and buckled in with no problem. He leaned to the side, up against the door, but to anyone passing us, he would just look like he was drunk or passed out.
While I had a house conveniently across the street, it was too close for comfort. After I took care of Clint, I’d come back and clean the place out of my equipment so it would look like no one had been there except maybe for surveys and inspections. No need to lead the police right to my door.
It was obvious Aiden was already suspicious enough. I was just thankful the house was in the name of one of my other businesses.
It only took ten minutes to get to my kill house on the other side of town, and by the time we arrived, my passenger was slumped against the door, passed out but still breathing.
While it would be easy to do a quick, no-fuss kill with something like a drug that couldn’t be detected, I needed the blood.
I needed to feel their lives slipping away from them.
That passive shit didn’t do it for me.
I parked the car in the garage, and when I got out, I grabbed Clint and carried him down to the basement that had already been set up for the evening’s activities. Tying him down to the table took no time at all, especially since he couldn’t struggle.
A smile crossed my face a few minutes later as he woke up, trying to scream behind the gag I’d shoved in his mouth, to the feel of my blade slicing from his armpit down to his hip. It was a deep cut, but that alone wouldn’t kill him.
Probably.
I ripped off the tape and gag with a smile as he let out a blood-curdling scream.
“Fuck you, you fucking psycho! Let me go!” He spat at me, though he missed by a mile.
It only made me smile more.
“You can scream all you want. We’re in a secluded place with no one around for miles.
So go ahead. In fact,” I said, looking around, thoughtful, “if you scream real good for me, then maybe you’ll make it go faster.
I do actually need to consider the time since I want to be able to call my boyfriend and talk to him before he goes to bed. ”
My words made me giddy like a schoolgirl.
I had a boyfriend. Someone I’d do anything for and who would do anything for me in return.
It was a heady feeling. A novel feeling of knowing there was someone for whom I’d burn the world down if I needed to, or if he asked.
It was something I thought I’d never get to experience.
But the thought made me sober as I remembered him showing up at my office earlier in the day. Everything was being ruined before it even really started.
Son of a fucking bitch.
I needed to figure out a way to get him off my trail. My desperation was going to make me sloppy, which would get me caught. I couldn’t have that.
The last thing I wanted to deal with was being faced with the choice of it coming down to me or Aiden. Because I didn’t know which one of us I’d choose, no matter how much I wanted to be able to say I’d pick him.
“Please, whatever you want, you can have it. I don’t have much, but I’ll get you whatever you need.” Tears streaked down Clint’s face as I swiped my blade across his chest, creating long, shallow cuts. “Please, please.”
His begging lit me up from the inside. Not in a sexual way, the way Aiden could light me up. Killing was more like the satisfaction of a job well done.
“That’s it. Just like that,” I encouraged. But my words only seemed to turn the other man into a blubbering mess, unable to form coherent words.
I continued to slide my knife through his flesh and swiped a finger through his blood as though it were finger paint. I wore gloves, but I hated them. There was nothing like feeling the blood on my skin. But I had to be careful. I couldn’t get caught.
Clint’s breaths got shallow in what felt like no time at all. Pity. I wanted to play longer, but I also knew that since I had Aiden, I couldn’t spend as much time with my victims.
Another pity.
But he was worth it. I’d rather be with him anyway.
“Goodbye, Clint.” I moved behind his head, flicked my knife across his throat, and reveled in the blood spray that covered him and the plastic sheeting that surrounded us.
My phone went off again while I watched the life drain from his body, along with his blood. I glanced over at where it sat on the other table and saw it was Aiden. Thinking about him texting me while we were both working made me smile.
I stared down at the body before me and frowned. There was no satisfaction over Clint’s death. No elation or release of endorphins or whatever the fuck it was that made me feel good after a kill.
Instead, I just felt as cold and empty as the body in front of me.
Fuck.