7. Luca
SEVEN
LUCA
I jumped in the shower when I got home.
I scrubbed myself twice in scalding water, but that didn’t get rid of the thoughts . His taunting whisper lingered in my ears like he’d followed me into the steam.
You look like you want me right here.
I shoved my palms against the slick tiles, breathing hard, water dripping from my hair and running into my eyes. He was supposed to die. Instead I let him tie me to a fucking chair. He was right. It was a sloppy mistake. Sloppy wasn’t my style.
I’d gotten distracted by his body. Hadn’t expected to admire the broad muscles of his back, his narrow waist, the way his ass had flexed when he kicked away his pants.
How his cock bobbed against his leg—even before he’d gotten hard.
The vision seared into my brain. I fought against it, but my cock surged to life.
What if I didn’t hate him? What if I hated myself for wanting him?
I squeezed my eyes shut.
His hand on me. The pressure at my throat. The way his mouth had suckled my skin.
My hand drifted downward.
Don’t.
I gripped the edge of the shower shelf, but it didn’t stop the ache curling low in my stomach. My hand slid to my cock. My fist wrapped around it, and heat shot through me.
I gritted my teeth. “Fuck.”
The slick glide of my hand wasn’t enough. It didn’t match what I imagined: Dominic leaning in, his fingers curling tight around my wrist, his smirk daring me to break. I saw his gleaming hazel eyes, fixed on me, as he whispered something.
Good boy.
My hand moved faster, heat pooling tighter in my gut. I tipped my head against the tiles, chasing a high I didn’t want but couldn’t stop.
I imagined his grip. His hand, not mine. The slick pressure, the deliberate squeeze. His mouth on my neck, moaning my name— Luca.
A guttural sound ripped from my throat as the tension snapped. My hips jerked into my hand, muscles locking as white-hot pleasure barreled through me. Thick streams of cum painted the tile in splattered ropes, running with the water. I pumped myself through the aftershocks, every gasp bouncing off the walls.
I stood there, shaking. The mess smeared down the tiles, swirling in the drain. My stomach turned.
I came thinking about a man ?
An icy wave washed over the heat. My hands shook as I reached for the shower head and rinsed the tiles. I twisted the handle, shutting off the water, leaning against the cool tile. Dragging myself out of the shower, I wrapped a towel around my waist. Sleep would clear my head. I stumbled into bed, face-first into my pillow.
Sleep wouldn’t come. I tossed and turned, punched my pillow, twisted the sheets, but it was useless. I replayed every taunt and touch. When dawn cracked through the blinds, I gave up. I threw myself into a grueling workout on the floor—push-ups, sit-ups, dips off the edge of the bed—until every muscle ached.
My phone lit up.
I grabbed it, glancing at the screen.
Mrs. Peretti
Hi, Luca! I’m visiting my sister for a few days. Would you mind taking in my mail?
Sure.
Mrs. Peretti
And could you feed the crows for me?
No problem.
Mrs. Peretti
Thank you so much!
My core burned as I lurched off the floor. My quads weren’t much better, but my shoulders screamed the most. Good. I liked the pain.
I headed for the kitchen. Every morning, Mrs. Peretti left out peanuts for the crows. She loved them, claimed they brought her gifts. Sighing, I grabbed the half-empty bread bag from the pantry. I stepped onto the fire escape, tore the bread into pieces, and scattered it on the ledge.
A dark shape swooped down to feast.
“You’re welcome,” I muttered.
A sharp knock echoed through the apartment.
Fuck . Now what?
I marched to the entry and opened the door.
Maria stood in the doorway, all dolled up. Her ebony hair was curled, and her pouty lips painted fuck-me red. She’d dressed in a dress that hugged her ass so close it might’ve been painted on.
Shit. I forgot that I’d invited her over.
“Hey, baby!”
She grabbed my shoulders and kissed me. Her perky tits pressed hard against my chest. Soft.
Entirely too soft. This woman radiated a princess vibe. Cuddly and warm with a sultry set of curves.
My cock didn’t even stir.
But that was my fault. I’d just come. I needed time to get hard again.
I hoped.
I gave her a quick peck, the taste of her gloss making me grimace. She strutted inside. Her hand stroked my chest, tracing my pecs.
Her eyes sparkled. “You’re so handsome.”
I forced a half-smile. “You look nice, too.”
Maria’s arms wrapped around my waist. I fought the urge to peel her off my body and closed the door. Her hand circled my waist and drifted lower. Her palm slid over my cock and gave it a squeeze. Then she mashed her lips to mine.
Nothing. Not even a twitch.
The uncomfortable twist in my stomach flared, and I pulled back.
“Actually, I…I need to hit the shower.”
She winked. “Oh yeah? Do you want company?”
I patted her shoulder. “Nah, I’m good.”
“It’s been two weeks , Luca,” she pouted.
I rubbed my neck, and her gaze darted to where my fingers brushed. Her expression shifted. She let out a short laugh.
“Well, I guess that explains it.”
“What?” I asked.
She crossed her arms. “There’s a hickey on your neck.”
Fucking Dominic.
I swallowed the urge to defend myself with something as weak as denial.
“So? We’re not exclusive.”
Her lips thinned. “Guess I was expecting too much. Figures.”
I almost apologized, but our arrangement had never been serious. Maria wanted invitations to high-profile events that’d launch her event-planning career. She hadn’t been subtle about it, dropping hints about who she could meet at the next fundraiser.
She pawed at my chest. “We could make this work, you know. I could use someone like you in my corner.”
“I can’t call in favors for someone I barely know.”
Her eyes narrowed. “Then take me out more. Introduce me to the right people. I’ll make it worth your while.”
“Oh yeah? How?”
Slowly, she dropped to her knees. Her hands slid to my waistband. Her dark hair fell in waves over her shoulders, and her plump cleavage teased with every breath. She looked pretty, sure. Delicate.
But…feminine.
Small and fragile and soft .
But I could’ve let her suck me off. It would’ve eased the tension clawing at my chest.
Only if you ask me nicely.
Heat curled around my neck.
I stepped back, ripping her hands off me. “Not now.”
Maria froze. “What is wrong with you?”
“I’m not in the mood.”
She stood, arms crossing. “You’re never in the mood anymore.”
I opened my mouth, but the truth tangled on my tongue. Denying it felt pointless. Admitting it was impossible.
“It’s complicated.”
She laughed. “That’s your excuse?”
“Maria, we aren’t in a relationship.”
“Yeah, but I didn’t think you’d be such an asshole about it.” She grabbed her bag, slinging it over her shoulder. “You know what? I’m done. You’re a mess, and not in a fun way.”
Fuck. I was more than a mess .
This shit was a disaster.
But at least she wouldn’t get caught in the wake.
Dominic called me at lunch, told me to get to the casino immediately. I strolled into Dominic’s office. Santino sat at Dominic’s desk, his jaw tight. Vinn lounged in a chair. Dominic leaned against the far wall, arms crossed.
Great. The last time this many Costas gathered for a chat, someone ended up at the bottom of the Harbor.
I stood taller as unease prickled along my spine. My eyes flicked to the the door I’d walked through. If they wanted to pull something, they’d have to work for it.
I smirked. “Am I late to the family picnic?”
Santino’s eyes narrowed. “Sit down, Luca.”
“I’ll stand, thanks.”
Dominic’s lips twitched. Vinn’s expression didn’t change. He exhaled sharply through his nose.
“We have a job for you,” Vinn said finally.
Here we go. “What is it?”
“Do you remember what I asked you to do for Friday’s fight?”
I nodded, my stomach knotting.I was supposed to keep an eye out for any Bratva members lurking in Santino’s ring.
Vinn’s black gaze drilled into me. “I need something else from you. I want you to throw the fight.”
I stared at him. “You’ve gotta be kidding me. I can make ten times that money for the family just by winning, without breaking my nose.”
Vinn leaned forward. “Your job isn’t to think. It’s to follow orders.”
The words hit like a slap. My fists clenched, but I forced my expression to stay neutral. Barely.
Santino’s silence stung worse than Vinn’s words. Normally, he’d have my back. Today, he sat there, avoiding my eyes.
They don’t trust me.
No one in this goddamned family did. After surviving fourteen fucking years in the Bratva, I was still just the Russian stray they picked up out of the gutter.
“Fine,” I ground out. “You want a fucking loser? You’ve got one.”
I stormed out, my mind a whirlwind of violence. The hallway felt too narrow. My thoughts spiraled as I stormed toward the stairwell.
They didn’t even bother with a pretense. Loyalty didn’t mean shit in this family.
A door slammed behind me, and I glanced over my shoulder.
Dominic headed toward me. “Luca.”
I ignored him, picking up my pace.
A hand clamped around my arm, yanking me to a stop. Dominic shoved me into an empty office, slamming the door behind us.
“What the fuck do you want?” I snarled, spinning to face him. “Here to remind me to be a good lapdog?”
His eyes narrowed. “You’re pissed off. Don’t do something stupid and make it worse.”
“How much worse can it get, Dom? I’m their goddamned punching bag. Hell, you’re probably loving this. Another reason to call me a fucking failure.”
He stepped closer. “You done yet? Or do you need to keep throwing your tantrum?”
“This is me keeping it together. You wouldn’t want to see what happens when I stop.”
He smirked. “Go ahead, Luca. Show me how scary you are. Throw your punches. Or is it easier to storm out like a kid who didn’t get his way?”
“Fuck you.” I stepped closer, toe-to-toe with him now. “You think I’m scared of you? Of them? I’ve survived worse than this family’s bullshit.”
“Then stop acting like you’ve got something to prove,” he snapped. “You’re in, Luca. Whether they trust you or not, you’re here. So, what are you going to do about it?”
I shrugged. “Doesn’t matter.”
“You think you’re an outcast. There’s no place for you. People either want to use you to murder or kill you themselves. If you’re eager to prove them right, get on your knees and bark like the Bratva dog you think you are.” His lips twitched. “Or you could get on your knees and do something actually useful.”
“Fuck off.”
“You’re so obsessed with what everyone thinks of you, but you can’t even look at yourself in the mirror. You know who you are. You’re Luca-fucking-Costa, and that man is whoever you decide to be.”
My chest heaved. “That man is ruined.”
He reached out, grabbing my jaw. His firm touch sent a jolt through me.
“You know what I think every time I see your hickey? I think about how much it eats at you. How badly you want to pretend it doesn’t exist, but no matter what you do, you can’t erase it.”
The pressure of his thumb increased.
My hands curled into fists. “Why do you keep pushing this?”
“I don’t know. Maybe it’s because you’re gloriously fucked up, and I’ve got a weakness for fixing broken things.”
Heat rushed to my face. “I don’t need your help.”
“I think you do.”
Dominic’s thumb glided across my jaw, tracing a slow line to my lips. He brushed it over my mouth, and heat uncoiled in my stomach. I scrambled for something to shut him out.
Maria.
Her laugh, her perfume, her tits pressed against me. Dominic’s presence burned through every distraction, leaving nothing but the feel of his thumb teasing the edge of my lip.
“You fight it so hard. What are you so afraid of?”
My lips parted, brushing the rough pad of his thumb as I struggled for air. It was maddening, and a bizarre urge seized me. To let my tongue flick against his skin. Dominic’s thumb pressed against my lower lip.
“Do you want me to stop?” he asked.
Yes. No. Shit, I didn’t know anymore.
I licked my lips, and the tip of my tongue grazed his thumb. The contact was so light, but heat shot through my body.
Dominic stilled. His pupils grew. His thumb shifted, dragging across my lip. It sent a pulse of heat straight to my cock.
Fuck .
My pants were too tight.
Dominic’s eyes flicked down. He nudged open my mouth. My breathing stuttered. His thumb slid in just past the edge, and a rough texture slid over my tongue.
“Open,” he whispered.
For some insane reason, I obeyed. He pushed his thumb in further. I tasted salt on his skin. My cock throbbed so hard it hurt.
“There it is,” Dominic purred. “Good boy.”
My body shuddered. The sensation of his thumb inside me stole every coherent thought. He began to move, pulling back slightly before pushing in again. The wet slide of my tongue against his skin made my pulse hammer.
“Suck.”
I froze, but his thumb didn’t retreat. Part of me wanted to defy him, but his penetrating stare broke something in me. My lips closed around him, and I sucked.
What was I doing?
Dominic’s breathing hitched. “Fuck.”
A flush crept up his neck, and saliva pooled in my mouth. That shouldn’t be my reaction . I should’ve been disgusted. Furious. Not drooling with how much I wanted more.
Dominic’s jaw tightened, his polished mask cracking. The unshakable Dominic Caruso was falling apart in front of me.
His breathing grew heavier. My tongue flicked the pad of his thumb again as I sucked hard. The other fingers holding my face trembled. His cock was rock hard, straining against his tailored slacks, and my stomach tightened. His thumb twitched against my tongue, like he fought the urge to push deeper.
His thumb slid free, and the air stung my wet lips. My heart hammered as he returned to his chair behind the desk. The taste of him lingered. I tried to steady my breathing.
What did I just do?
Dominic cleared his throat. His gaze darted toward me, then away, like he couldn’t decide whether to gloat or run. The flush creeping up his neck deepened, spreading to his ears.
I smirked. “Something wrong, boss?”
His eyes snapped to mine. For once, Dominic Caruso didn’t have a witty retort locked and loaded. That alone felt like a victory.
He nodded. “You can go.”
Heat flashed through me—anger, humiliation, and that damned spark. I turned and stormed out of the office before I did something stupid.
As I stepped into the casino’s main floor, the noise of the machines washed over me. I sucked in a breath. I couldn’t let him win. I needed to get my shit together.