Chapter 14
Chapter Fourteen
RENLEY
“Look at me,” Aunt Kitty says from where she’s trying out a kayak. She’s wearing a bright red life vest, paddle in hand, and pretending to push through the water, while Rupert takes pictures of her the entire time.
Still unsure why I brought her.
Then again, imagine if I didn’t. If it was just me and Theo, I’m pretty sure I’d have parked the car on the side of the road and asked him to get out. Leotards? Guinea pigs? Favorite Taylor Swift song?
Who is this man?
And why did I agree to go on walks with him every day?
I was trying to set the precedent that when we’re around each other, we don’t have to talk, but my God, I’m not sure that helped. I think it might have made things worse.
“Should I get it?” Aunt Kitty asks.
“No,” I say, shaking my head and turning away to see Theo approaching with a pair of shoes in hand, along with some shorts, T-shirts, and socks.
He smiles at me, his arms full, looking ridiculous in his loafers and shorts. But damn it, he does have a nice smile, even though it pains me to admit that.
“Got everything I need.”
“That was quick.”
“I’m not complicated.”
“Are you sure?” I ask. “You seem pretty high maintenance.”
“How am I high maintenance?”
“For one, you brought a friend with you here.”
“Well, pardon my decision to use caution. If you were in my shoes, would you not have brought a friend with you as an extra precaution?” He lifts a brow.
“No,” I say, even though that’s a bold-faced lie. I probably would have brought two people, a can of pepper spray, and a machete, just to set a precedent.
“You’re such a liar,” he says with a laugh.
“Believe what you want to believe.”
“I will.” He takes a step closer, and I catch a whiff of his cologne, that same cologne that I was smelling in the car ride all the way here. Notes of what I can only describe as cedar and citrus. Smells annoyingly good.
“How else am I high maintenance?”
“Do I need to mention the tassel again?”
“Might not hurt.”
I shake my head and take a step back because I don’t like being that close to him. “So you have no problem talking here, but in the car, you bring up topics that would make a certified conversationalist have a mental breakdown.”
“I don’t think someone who can remain silent for a solid thirty-five minutes has any right to talk about conversation skills.”
“If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.” I shrug.
“Bullshit. You were being silent on purpose, admit it.”
“I was not.”
“Yes, you were.”
“What good would it do for me to be silent?”
“Uh, to mentally mess with me? To have the upper hand. To let me know that even though we made an agreement, you still have the upper hand.”
I examine my nails and say, “Quite the storyline you’re creating in your head.”
An accurate one.
What is this guy, a mind reader?
He’s a dangerous breed and I’ll need to be on my toes around him.
“Well,” Aunt Kitty says, walking up to us. “Leaving behind a piece of my heart in this store today, but that doesn’t mean I’ll forget the bond I forged.”
Theo raises a brow and I say, “She fell in love with a kayak.”
“Oh, which one?”
“The blue one on display,” I answer.
“That’s a nice kayak.”
“She’s a beauty.” Aunt Kitty sighs. “But sometimes, great loves have to part.”
Theo slowly nods.
“Okay, well, if you have everything you need, then let’s get going. You can check out and we’ll wait for you by the storefront.”
He takes off toward the register while we move to the front of the store. “Maybe we can play some music on the way home,” I say to Aunt Kitty, who prefers to have it quiet in the car for her thoughts.
“You know I get too pumped up with music. I’m not sure these guys are ready to see my moves.”
“I love you, Aunt Kitty, but no one on this planet is ready to see your moves.”
“Care to share your phone number with me, love?” Rupert asks Kitty as he walks up to us. “I can send you these pictures of you in the kayak.”
“Nice try. Do you really think I’d give my phone number to a stalker?” Aunt Kitty shakes her head. “I’ll take a picture of the picture. Now hold out your phone.”
Jesus.
After a few minutes, pictures of pictures have been taken, Theo has checked out, and we are all on our way out of the sporting goods store, with an attendant walking next to us.
“So you’re just going to pull to the front?” the attendant asks.
“Yes, that’s correct,” Theo answers.
“Great, we’ll bring it out front.”
Confused, I ask, “Bring what out front?”
Theo smirks and says, “The blue kayak. Couldn’t let your aunt be separated from her long-lost love.”
Oh for the love of God. He can’t be serious. Why would he buy that for her?
“Ahh!” Aunt Kitty shouts and then grips Theo’s arm. “Are you serious?”
Chuckling, he nods. “But I get to borrow it.”
Aunt Kitty leans back and looks Theo in the eyes. “I don’t know if I’m comfortable with anyone else slipping into my kayak’s hole.”
“Can you not phrase it like that?” I say. “Also, we’re not taking a kayak home. There is no need for a kayak. She doesn’t even know how to paddle in a kayak, and the last thing I need is for her to capsize in a kayak. So we’re returning it, plain and simple.”
“Is this right?”
“Perfect,” Rupert says as he takes pictures of Aunt Kitty in her kayak, which she has named The Admiral.
On full display for all the neighbors to see, she’s out in the front yard, paddling her little heart out and shouting terms like “ahoy” and “starboard side” and “nookie shack,” whatever the hell that is.
I’m sitting on the porch, less than thrilled with the outcome.
Like…why?
Why was it necessary for Theo to buy that thing?
Was he trying to win brownie points? Because I can tell you right now, he’s won negative points. Extremely negative.
Was he trying to get in my good graces? Because it’s doing the exact opposite.
“From the way you’re stewing, I can tell that you’re not happy with The Admiral,” Theo says from the bottom of the porch stairs.
Looking him in the eyes, I say, “We need to talk.”
Nervously, he taps the stair post and says, “Uh, is that a good ‘We need to talk’ or a bad ‘We need to talk’?”
“What do you think?”
“Bad.”
I tap my nose. “You got it. Come with me.”
I bring him into my house, but I leave the door open, just for good measure. Then I point to the couch and say, “Take a seat.”
To his credit, he does as he’s told, and I grab a piece of paper and a pen.
“We need to set some ground rules if you’re going to stay for a few days—”
“The summer,” he says. “I’m staying for the summer. Just want to make sure that’s clear.”
“Are you sure?”
“The house is paid through August. I’m very sure.”
August?
But it’s June 2.
That’s…that’s so long.
“Well, then we need this more than anything.”
“Need what?” he asks.
“An agreement of sorts.”
“I thought we had one.”
“It’s too loose. We need it in writing. Something that we can hold ourselves to. Because I’m not trying to be ungrateful or rude, but buying my aunt a kayak shouldn’t have happened.”
“Because?”
“Because you’re not here to buy your way into us liking you.”
“Is that what you think I’m doing?” he asks.
“It is.”
He stares at me for a few seconds and then capitulates. “You’re right, that’s what I was trying to do.”
Well…got to give him credit for honesty.
“However, that won’t work, and it only makes you mad. Am I right?” he asks.
“We don’t need your money.”
Wincing slightly, he says, “Not to get too literal here, but you kind of did…you know, for your store. Which, by the way, will I get a tour?”
Oof, he’s right about that. Damn it.
“Please, I haven’t even gotten the nerve to enter the store.” The words fall out of my mouth before I can stop them. Oh crap.
“Why is that?”
I wave him off dismissively. “That’s neither here nor there. We’re not here to talk about that. We’re here to talk about us.”
I can see him wanting to question me further. It’s right there, on the tip of his tongue, but he’s a smart man and he backs off.
“Okay, then, let’s talk about us.”
The way he says “us,” with an inflection—not sure I care for it, but I’ll drop it for now.
“Like I said, we need to set some ground rules so that we can live harmoniously together.”
“Could not agree more. It’s going to be a long summer if we can’t get along.”
“Exactly.”
He smirks. “Look at us agreeing on things. It’s like we’re practically friends already.”
“Please refrain from making outlandish comments.” That makes him chuckle.
“My apologies. Please go on.”
“Thank you.” I clear my throat. “Okay, rule number one, you’re not allowed to try to buy our affection.”
“Keeping the wallet in the pocket. Got it.”
“Rule number two, you’re allotted one visitation a day. I’ve seen you far too much since you got here. Everywhere I turn, you’re there.”
“One visitation?” He shakes his head. “Impossible. That would mean that I’d only see you when we take our walks.”
“Exactly.”
“Not feasible. We live next to each other. We’re bound to run into each other, and I’m sorry, I can’t be cold and just ignore you. How about ten visitations a day?”
“Ten?” I feel my eyes nearly fall out of their sockets. “No way. That’s way too much.”
“Not for me.” He wiggles his brows. “I’d take twenty.”
I point the pen at him. “None of that. Rule number three, no flirting.”
“Ooh, ouch, sorry, no can do. Flirting is in my nature.”
“Then stop it. Pretend I’m a tree stump or something.”
“You know, I can flirt my way around a tree stump no problem.”
“No flirting,” I reiterate with my most serious expression.
“How about minimal flirting? Accidental flirting? I won’t go out of my way to flirt, but if I make a comment that’s within the realm of flirting, then that’s okay.”
“Fine.”
“Thank you. Now, where did we land on the ten visitations?”
“We didn’t. It’s one.”
“You can’t give me one. That’s unreasonable.”
“Fine, two.”
“Eight.”
I shake my head. “Three.”
“Nine.”
“Hey, you went from eight to nine.”
“I know, I drive a hard bargain.” He winks.