Chapter 38
She grit her teeth and resisted his pull. “I will pick you up and throw you over my shoulder if you don’t follow me right now.”
“Someone has to do something.” She responded, desperation clear in her tone. Her eyes were glued on the cage, and he could practically see her brain tripping over ways to get involved.
“I agree.” He wrapped his hand around her wrist, surveying the people around them and preparing to do exactly as he had said, “And we are doing something. But if you cause a scene now, we won’t have the option of doing something.”
He felt her relax a little, and tried to pull her wrist. She came with him willingly, but her eyes never left the creature on the stage.
He led her into an alley that was far enough from the center that it was devoid of people.
“What the hell Clara? You have to prioritize the assignment. I can’t spend this trip keeping you from starting fights! ”
Her eyes snapped to his, and he stepped back at the force of her glare. “Don’t tell me what to prioritize. Those are people, people Carver!”
“Not anymore, they’re not.” He scoffed, running a hand through his hair. It was the wrong thing to say. He knew that the moment the last word left his lips.
He still wasn’t prepared for her to slap him. His face stung instantly, tears filling his eyes from the shock of it. He flexed his jaw, hand gingerly coming up to his cheek, waiting for the reflex of tears to fade enough he could respond. “The hell Clara!”
She crossed her arms over her chest. “You’re a jerk. Completely and entirely a jerk! You don’t even care that they’re people.”
“You don’t get to tell me what I care about.” Every word was controlled, his voice dangerously low.
“It’s so obvious. You want to stay perfect Mr. Carver Vaughan.
” She held her hands in front of her, mocking him with every word.
“Complete the assignment and return like none of this happened. Like we didn’t see anything.
None of this even matters to you. Just another check box on your list of things to complete. ”
He clenched his teeth, determined not to give her the response she wanted.
But she didn’t stop there. “We were content. We were happy. Until I did something that would have messed up your perfect image. Right?” She threw her hands up.
“You couldn’t date a soldier. Would have ruined everything.
I was supposed to stay the gentle rich girl.
Perfect for you. Someone to show off. But I didn’t, did I? So you ended it.”
Thoughts stopped running through his head, and before he knew why or what he was doing, he had pinned her hands above her head, holding them there as his face hovered above hers. “That’s not what happened.” He panted out, unsure why he was out of breath. She was breathing hard too.
His nose bumped hers and neither flinched away.
“No?” She whispered, less violence in her voice.
Her eyes searched his. He didn’t know what she was looking for, but he hoped she found it.
And then she kissed him. It felt like the world was spinning.
He didn’t know what was happening. Just that it shouldn’t be.
He felt himself lean into her, a motion he couldn’t stop.
He needed her. He needed to be even closer.
He pressed her further against the wall, his body squaring against hers.
Further, further. It was everything he knew he shouldn’t do.
Everything he had wanted to do the past several days.
Everything he would never forgive himself for doing since he was supposed to keep his distance.
Finally, his thoughts caught up with his actions and he pulled himself away from her lips long enough to look into her eyes.
Her eyes were wide, her lips still parted.
Then she placed both hands on his chest, and shoved him away from her.
Heat still raged within his body, and he wasn’t thrilled with the distance she had created.
She held her hands out in front of herself.
“You stay there.” She ran a hand through her hair, it was entirely falling from the pieces she had pinned back that morning.
“Clara,” he whispered, taking a step back towards her.
“I mean it, Carver.” He stayed where he was. “I don’t know what that was, but it can’t happen. We can’t happen.”
“Just the sexual tension Marsh warned us about,” he attempted to lighten the mood.
She laughed, but there was no mirth in the sound. “I’m such an idiot.” She muttered.
“You’re not an idiot.”
Her eyes flashed as she raised her head. “Carver, you’re my partner on this assignment. I can’t kiss you. I can’t like you. I can’t do anything but protect you and do everything in my power to accomplish our assignment.”
She was right, but his resolve against their relationship crumbled the moment she pressed her lips to his. All he wanted was to resume that moment. No matter how foolish, no matter what the cost. “Why can’t it be both?”
She scoffed, “Uh, I don’t know. Maybe because you abandoned me?
You broke up with me for absolutely no reason.
I walked into the Vipers section broken, wondering what I did that was so bad you couldn’t stay with me, assuming that even with everything I had done to prove I was strong, somehow you still only saw me as weak. ”
His heart plummeted. How is that the way she saw what happened? “That’s not true. I was trying to protect you. Everything I’ve ever done was to protect you.”
“So you’ve said. I don’t believe you.” Her words were curt. Precise.
He didn’t have a response. There were no words he could offer to prove his sincerity. A broken promise was all it took to shatter words, and he knew he couldn’t easily come back from that past mistake.
“We should get back to the festival.” With that, she turned and walked out of the alley.
Carver took a deep breath, attempting to cool himself off from the heated moment and the painful conversation after. He would do anything to erase the past. She was right, he couldn’t protect her. And he wasn’t sure she needed his protection anymore anyway.
She had joined onlookers at another stand, and he sidled up behind her without a word.