Chapter 29 - Tate #2
How fucking pathetic? I’m sitting here sobbing on his couch, in his home that he left. If anyone should’ve left, it should’ve been me.
Fuck, I should’ve never said anything. I should’ve just told Fletcher to let it go. I should’ve just let it go.
I close my eyes, run my hands through my hair, and try to pull myself together. The last thing I should be doing is driving home like this, but I don’t want him to avoid his house because of me.
I let out a quick breath, push myself off the couch, and—
“Fletcher.”
I don’t phrase it as a question, but I definitely wasn’t expecting to turn and see him standing in the doorway.
“I thought you left.”
It’s a stupid thing to say. Again, this is his house. He probably realized on the way to his car that he had more of a right to stay here than I did.
“I did.” He doesn’t move from the doorway.
His head slightly bobs as he rocks on his heels, looking anywhere but at me.
“But then I realized how fucking stupid it would be for me to just walk away. We’ve been hiding from this for years, Tate.
Running. But as I was walking to my car, I realized the reason we were running was that we were both scared of losing each other.
And if that’s going to happen, if that’s how this ends, then—”
His eyes finally meet mine, and my heart sinks into my stomach.
“Then what?”
“Then fuck it.”
My head tilts gently to the side, and my eyebrows furrow, not fully understanding what he means. But then he slams the door shut behind him and bolts toward me.
I don’t even have time to fully react or comprehend what’s going on before he grabs my face between his hands and pulls me into him.
The kiss is full of urgency, want, and desire. And I can’t help but sink into him. This is so different from the first time we kissed. That was two kids who used alcohol as an excuse to give in.
We don’t have any excuses for this.
Only the truth.
We want this.
We’ve wanted this.
This kiss is full of all the years we fought this off.
His thumb brushes against my chin as he pulls back.
“If I’m going to lose you anyway,” he wet his lips, “I wasn’t going out with any regrets.”
His eyes soften, just for a moment, and then they’re indifferent. His hands fall away from my face, and he turns around.
My jaw practically hits the floor when I realize what he’s doing. He’s saying goodbye.
I grab his wrist, stopping him in his tracks.
He looks at me, eyes full of uncertainty, and I don’t blame him. How do you give in to something you’ve spent your whole life running away from?
I take a step toward him. He stiffens slightly, but when my hand meets his face, he melts into me.
I press my lips against his. My kiss is softer than his. Full of more love than desire. Full of hope. A hope that shows him I don’t want this to be goodbye. I want it to be the start of something new between us. Something better.
He runs his tongue over my bottom lip, sending chills down my body.
I wrap my arms around his neck and let Fletcher take full control.
His tongue darts its way into my mouth, exploring every corner like he might not get another chance.
My fingers roam his hair, pulling his lips even closer to mine, if that is even possible.
His lips leave mine and find their way down to my neck, kissing all the way down to my chest before finding my lips again.
His hands travel down my body before stopping on my ass, and in one swift motion, he lifts me off the ground.
My legs instantly wrap around his body as he walks us over to the couch.
We sink into the cushions together, his lips never leaving mine.
Fuck, I wish I would’ve given in sooner.
I wish I had taken the risk sooner because this is a million times better than I imagined.
He kisses his way down my body. Every inch of me aches for him, and he satisfies each little ache by making sure not an inch of my body goes untouched. He places soft kisses along my stomach, lifting my shirt up just enough to give him access. Then his hand grazes the waistband of my sweats.
“Wait.” I grab his hand, and he’s off of me in seconds.
“Sorry.” He shakes his head. “I got carried away, but we should—”
I scoot toward him. “Fletcher, I want you. I want you more than anything. And I want you right now. What I don’t want is for one of the other five guys you live with to walk in and see us naked on the couch. We aren’t Zeke.”
“Right.” His shoulders loosen as the words sink in, and then he sweeps me off the couch and carries me up to his bedroom.
He sets me on his bed, watching me as he takes off his sweatshirt. My eyes don’t leave his as I pull my sweatpants down over my hips, slide them down my legs, and then kick them across the room. He walks toward me slowly, and I slide my way up his bed.
I’m seeing Fletcher in a whole new way.
I always thought he was attractive, but the Fletcher standing in front of me is not the same boy I’ve been in love with all my life. I don’t know how to put it into words.
He climbs over me; the only piece of clothing remaining is his underwear. He smiles at me, his body hovering over mine, taking this all in.
I like the way he looks at me. It’s everything I’ve ever dreamed of.
“You’re so beautiful, you know that.”
My cheeks burn, and I try to look away, but his hand tucks under my chin and turns my face back to look at him.
“You don’t have to do that. Not with me.”
I don’t say anything; I just pull his body down against mine, savoring every second of this kiss. Of this moment.
His hand brushes against the hem of my t-shirt before pushing it gently up my body, just far enough out of the way for his hand to graze the band of my underwear. His hand dips under the band slightly, and I suck in a breath.
“Fletch,” I whisper; he relocates his gaze to mine, “as much as I want that, what I really want is you inside of me.”
“Whatever you want.” He places a soft kiss on my lips before reaching into his nearby desk for a condom. He strips down the rest of the way, and I can’t help but stare at him. He rips open the condom, dropping the wrapper on the floor before sliding it on and moving back over me on the bed.
His eyes don’t leave mine as his hands find my underwear and pull them down my body. They don’t leave my eyes as he tosses my underwear across the room. And they still don’t shift as I lift my arms, allowing Fletcher to pull my t-shirt over my head.
And now it’s just us.
His thumb runs along my lower lip as he adjusts our bodies so he’s positioned between my legs.
“Are you sure about this?” His eyebrows knit together.
“I’m more sure about this than I’ve ever been about anything.”
His lips crash down onto mine, his tongue breaking right through the seam of my lips, taking full control of the kiss. Of the moment. And then, without another word, he gently sinks into me.
My back arches as my nails dig into his back.
Holy. Fuck.
He deepens our kiss as he pulls out of me slowly. Every inch of my body is on fire in the best way. Unlike the first time, this time, he slams back into me, filling me with a sensation I didn’t know was possible. He thrusts into me again, and I let out a breathy moan, which he captures with a kiss.
He finds the perfect rhythm for our bodies. A mixture of fast and rough and gentle and passionate. His mouth finds the crook of my neck again, but this time, as he thrusts back into me, his teeth sink into my neck, and the sting is quickly replaced with the comfort of his lips.
He brushes the hair out of my face as he begins to pick up his pace.
His hands sink into mine, pinning them against the bed as I get closer to my tipping point.
His lips meet my chest, pushing me toward that point even quicker.
My back arches, and my toes curl as I completely unravel.
My nails dig into his hands as he continues to thrust into me, riding out my orgasm while getting him to his own.
His lips find mine once more as he reaches his own tipping point. His teeth tug on my bottom lip as he does, and then his forehead falls against mine.
He gently kisses me. I can feel the smile on his face as he does, and I slowly open my eyes. I honestly don’t know how I’m still seeing straight after that. I’ve never had an experience like that. The kind that has you seeing stars.
Fletcher rolls off of me and disposes of the condom before rolling back over. I turn onto my stomach, watching him as he draws lazy circles on my bare skin.
“What happens now?”
I don’t know if it’s the right question to ask after what just happened, but we went from our friendship ending to having sex in his bed, so I think I have every right to be confused.
“Well, I thought it was pretty clear. We’re not friends anymore.” My eyes widen slightly. Definitely not where I thought this was going. He chuckles. “Because we are more, Tate. So much more. And nothing is going to change that.”