Chapter 24
Sloane
Let’s get one thing straight: I am not a masochist. I don’t seek out the people who would’ve liked to have been my ex, such as Kiera…or Alex. And I certainly don’t volunteer for events that include them.
The gods must have a sick sense of humor, but even they’re running out of new ways to test my coping skills at the moment.
Why can’t the past stay where it belongs?
I mean, it’s not like I should feel anything about seeing Kiera again, but my brain likes to kick up the dust and remind me of how awful Kiera was to Eden and how over the top she was with me.
It also reminds me of how I pushed Eden away in senior year when things were getting stressful, just like I did in college. It just wasn’t as extreme back then.
Alex’s “I’m running in the same charity race” meet-up, which turned out to not be as horrendous as I first thought, was the start.
Alex clearly saw Eden and I were together again and didn’t make the situation worse by declaring her undying love for me or anything, which really helped my anxiety levels.
I got a nice text from her a couple of days after the race, where she reiterated her happiness for me and Eden and said I looked really good.
There’s a chance we could be friends again.
Kiera is next. And not just Kiera, but Kiera plus Jenna, which is apparently the hot new item on the friendship menu. I got the news last night at 10:37 p.m., when Jenna banged on my door, brimming with the kind of energy that only people under twenty or Labrador retrievers possess.
“It’s official!” she’d squealed, and I nearly dropped my phone in surprise.
“What is?”
“Me and Kiera. We’re, like, together together. You know, capital D dating.“ Jenna did a little hop, barefoot, which led me to wonder where her shoes were.
“Congratulations?” I said, though it came out as a question. Jenna grinned so hard I was afraid she’d break her cheekbones.
So that’s how I found out that my closest friend and the girl who used to like me are now together. It’s not scandalous. This is, after all, Eden’s circle. It’s just…statistically improbable. Like flipping a coin and having it land on its edge. Twice.
Today’s event is billed as a “family reunion-slash-barbecue,” hosted by Eden’s parents, who have the exact same sense of drama as their daughter, and, as rumor has it, a fridge full of imported prosecco.
The house is ten minutes away, but I leave twenty just in case I need to circle the block for emergency self-pep talks.
When I pull up, the driveway is full. Eden’s parents’ Volvo, a powder blue Mini Cooper that screams “Jenna,” and, parked with ruthless precision, a new SUV that can only be Kiera’s.
I would know if I’d taken Eden up on her offer to stay over with her last night, but I had a morning mentoring session and needed to be well rested.
I hover in the car, scrolling through my socials and pretending to check for urgent texts.
Nothing. Not even a meme from Becca, who once texted me “help” from Eden’s living room because she was trapped in a two-hour conversation with Eden’s dad about Brexit and “the decline of European civilization.” Apparently, I’m on my own.
I can’t understand why this is affecting me so much.
When I finally get out, the air is heavy with the sort of humidity that coats your skin before you even make it to the porch.
The side gate is open, and I can already hear Eden’s laugh above the chattering throng.
I take a breath and slip through the gate, head down, sunglasses on. I really need to sort my shit out.
The backyard is peak suburban bliss. String lights zigzag above a collection of folding tables covered in red gingham.
There’s a homemade cornhole set, at least three kinds of chips, and Eden’s dad manning the grill like he’s auditioning for a Food Network show.
Eden is front and center, arms flailing as she tells some story to a rapt audience of three: her mom, gran and… Kiera.
I still find it strange sometimes to see Eden like this. She was quiet at school, always choosing to stay out of the spotlight. Not now, though.
My eyes glide to Kiera. She looks different.
Not in the “dyed her hair and got a tattoo” way.
More like someone who finally learned to take life less seriously.
She’s still fine-tuned muscle, but there’s a groundedness to her now.
No more air of authority or scowling at everyone in the near vicinity.
Instead, she sits back in her chair, arm draped across the table, listening with a soft half-smile.
I see Jenna waving me over with enthusiasm. Everyone turns, and I give my best “casual but not trying too hard” wave.
Eden bounds up, still mid-laugh. “Sloane! You made it. And you brought—“ she glances at my hands. ”—yourself. Perfect.”
“I brought my sparkling personality,” I say. Jenna giggles. Kiera just nods in my direction, eyes kind and maybe a little wary. I get it.
Introductions are unnecessary, but Eden does them anyway, just for the performance. “You all know Sloane. Sloane, you know everyone.”
I settle in next to Jenna, who’s vibrating with excitement. Her hair’s tied back in a messy knot, flecks of grass still clinging to her shins. She leans over and whispers, “You’re cool with this, right? Me and Kiera?”
“Of course,” I whisper back.
Jenna beams, squeezing my arm. I catch Kiera glancing at us, but she looks away quickly, the tip of her ear turning a little red.
The rest of the group is Eden’s family. Pia is looking a lot better, and from what I hear, her temper has calmed down. She’s walking the boundary of the backyard gently swaying little Meena. Todd is standing by Rick, but his attention is solely on his own family.
My parents will be over a little later to join in the fun too, which makes today feel like a big deal.
Eden’s mom swoops in with a tray of deviled eggs and distracts everyone by accidentally dropping half onto the patio. There’s a brief scramble of bodies. Eden’s dad appears out of nowhere with a broom and Becca with paper towels.
Kiera slides into the chair across from me, hands clasped politely. “So, Sloane,” she says, voice softer than I remember. “What have you been up to?”
I smile politely. “Mostly just work.” I don’t mention the crapshoot the past few years have been.
Kiera nods. “Same,” she replies, and I hate how weird this feels. We were friends at one point. Hell, we spent four years in the same school. Why do teenage hormones and adolescent bullshit always have to ruin things?
“Ah, the glamorous life of a soccer coach,” I say, trying to lighten the mood. “Do they pay you in orange slices or actual currency?”
She grins. “Both. Some of these kids are scary good. I’d put money on them beating our old team.”
And that’s it. The tension evaporates and we chat away like two schoolgirls catching up. It’s nice.
The afternoon settles into a predictable rhythm of eating too much, making fun of Bella’s playlist and recounting old stories that get progressively more exaggerated with each telling.
I keep an eye on Jenna and Kiera, but they’re genuinely sweet together.
There’s a tenderness in the way Kiera fills Jenna’s plate and the way Jenna pokes Kiera’s side to make her laugh.
I’m halfway through my second glass of lemon water when Eden corners me, arms crossed and a look that means “we need to talk.”
“You’re being weird,” she says.
“I’m always weird,” I reply. “That’s my brand.”
“You know what I mean. Are you okay with Kiera being here? With her and Jenna?”
I squint at the sunlight, taking a long sip of my sparkling water before answering, “Honestly? I’m fine. It’s just…seeing everyone from my past moving forward reminds me I’ve been stuck on pause for too long.”
Eden’s eyes soften. “You’re not on pause. You’re, like, buffering. There’s a difference.”
I snort. “Is this a TED Talk?”
She punches my arm. “You’re too hard on yourself.”
“I’m just realistic,” I say, but Eden shakes her head.
“You’re nostalgic,” she replies, and I don’t have a comeback for that because I think she’s right. I’ve always seen high school as my crowning glory. It was where I felt comfortable, accepted, and dare I say the ugly word…normal.
Eden sighs, then pulls me into a side hug. “You’re my favorite person, do you know that?”
I do, actually.
The party picks up when Eden’s grandma finally arrives, fresh from her trek around the local art gallery with her husband in tow, who looks ready for a drink. She zeroes in on me like a heat-seeking missile.
“Sloane! It’s about time I got some one-on-one with you, my love.”
Everyone stops talking. Jenna looks at Eden, who is looking at me because I know my eyes have grown super wide. I contemplate running for the hills, but Eden’s mom swoops in with another tray and diverts the attention.
I lock eyes with Kiera. She’s trying not to laugh, but she’s losing. I smile back because I’m not the only girlfriend Eden’s gran will meet today.
“I can’t wait.” I grin. “You should also spend some time with Kiera,” I add, nodding my head in her direction.
Kiera goes beet red, which makes me chuckle. Gran spins on her heels and heads in her direction, effectively letting me off the hook. I genuinely can’t wait to get to know Eden’s gran, but today is already feeling overwhelming, so I’m happy to throw Kiera to the wolves this once.
At dusk, we all migrate to the lawn for an impromptu soccer match: Eden’s family versus the “Degenerates,” which is just the friend group plus Kiera.
My parents are happy to sit this one out and drink wine.
I get slotted as goalkeeper because nobody trusts me with their shins, which is slightly offensive.
I’m not the only competitive one in the mix.
The game is chaos. Jenna scores on her own team at least twice. Eden’s dad tries to headbutt the ball and nearly concusses himself. Kiera trounces us all, which leads to some serious pouting from Jenna, and Eden keeps getting distracted by me in shorts, which I can’t really complain about.
Afterward, when we’re all suitably sweaty and grass-stained, we collapse on the patio. Kiera sits beside me, stretching her calves, and says, “This was fun. I’m glad we’re all still friends.”
“Me too,” I answer sincerely. Burying another source of discomfort is just another piece of the puzzle slotting into place. By the end of the summer, I think I’ll only have my ongoing battle with anxiety to deal with. Won’t that be nice?
The night winds down with sparklers and a truly terrible round of karaoke led by Eden’s grandma, who insists on singing “Like a Virgin” at full volume. The neighbors bang on the fence in protest, but nobody cares.
Kiera helps me collect empty cups at the end of the night, and we stand side by side in the dim porch light.
“So,” she says, voice low. “Are we good?”
“We’re good,” I say. “Really.”
She nods, and there’s a long, easy silence between us. Then she leans in, voice barely above a whisper. “I always knew Eden was it for you. I’m really sorry I tried to mess with that. I had my own shit going on at home, not that I’m using it as an excuse.”
I nod in understanding. “Believe me, I get it.”
Kiera grins. “It really is good to be back with the gang.”
I smile widely in response, because it is good to be together again.
She heads inside, and I watch her go, a little lighter than before. Maybe Eden’s right, maybe buffering is just the start of something new. Maybe I’m finally ready to start streaming. Ugh, I hate this metaphor. The point is, I came home to sort my life out and I think I’m about there.
I linger on the porch a while, watching the lights and listening to the faint sound of laughter through the screen door. Eden slides in next to me and wraps her arm around my waist.
“Kiera really likes my sister, huh?”
I laugh. “They’re super cute together.”
“Gross, but true,” she admits. “So…”
“So?”
“You wanna stay at my place tonight and fool around?”
The fact she asks me in a southern American accent has me cracking up. “You dork!”
“Is that a yes?” she asks, wiggling her eyebrows.
“It’s a yes. We’ll need to keep it down though because I’m tired of Bella glaring at me over my cereal.”
Eden snorts. “Do you know how many nights I’ve had to listen to Becca chanting Bella’s name like she’s possessed? I don’t know how we’re still friends to be fair. So they can suck it up or stay at Becca’s place, which probably hasn’t been lived in for the past three months.”
Her comment stirs something in me. If we’d stayed together through college, there is no doubt we’d be living together now.
So where does that leave us? Because, as Eden said, we’re in this fully, and I want nothing more than to start rebuilding our life together.
That includes sharing an apartment, ideally without two other people in it.
“That’s one hell of a face you’re pulling there, babe!”
Deciding to leave that train of thought for another day, I pull her into me and kiss her. “I’m good, but I am ready to go.”
“I’ll just let Mum and Dad know. Pia’s already gone to bed, but I promised to spend some time with her tomorrow.”
Biting my lip, I nod. “Maybe I could take your gran out. You know, get to know her on my own.”
Eden looks at me silently for a few beats. “I love you, Sloane.”
“Right back at ya, Sawyer.”