Chapter 5
FIVE
MALIK
What the hell had we just done? I lifted my head from Grey’s shoulder and peered at him.
He was fast asleep or passed out. I winced.
Oh hell, he was drunk, and I should have known better.
Okay, I was drunk too, but that was no excuse.
Was I a molester now? But he’d wanted it.
He’d asked for it, like out loud and shit.
I drank in his gorgeous face, the angular jawline and pouty lips. I was a shit friend. But how could I resist him? He’d made it known on the wall outside the house that he wanted me, hadn’t he? No straight guy rubbed his boner on his friend. I wasn’t stupid.
I lifted away from him, the air conditioning cold against my wet skin. Wet with our cum. I had to clean us up without waking him. But then, should I sleep with him? He asked me to, didn’t he? Something was up with him and this Ella person back home.
Carefully rising from the bed, I tossed off my shirt, kicked off my underwear and shorts, and padded into his bathroom. After wetting a washcloth and wiping off, I stepped to his bed.
God, he was a thing of beauty, like an angel, sleeping with his blond hair tousled around his forehead, his thick lips parted and his fucking body—abs for days and the best V-line between the hips I’d ever seen. I sat on the bed and cleaned the cum off him with slow, deliberate swipes.
Muttering, he smacked his lips and shifted.
I scanned him for more cum. Dark spots showed on his silky briefs, pooled at the tops of his thighs. I should take those off. I drew them down his legs and threw them into the hamper he kept in his closet.
As I stood naked at his bed with my hands planted on my hips, I attempted to think this through.
If I left him here and returned to my room, he might not remember what happened.
An ache sliced across my heart. Or he’d remember parts of it and might be confused and embarrassed.
I twisted my lips. But then if I slept with him, he also might not remember and just think we had a hell of a night.
I could tell him he begged me to sleep with him, and it would be the truth.
Plus, if he remembered, I’d be here for the fallout.
He’d have to acknowledge it and talk to me.
“Fuck it.” I had to stay. Climbing onto the bed, I slipped the covers down and then over us both and lay on my back.
With his eyes closed, he crept to my side, laying his head on my chest and his leg across both of mine, his spent dick pressing to my hip.
Holy fuck. He wasn’t fully present, but it was like his subconscious knew what it wanted. I wrapped my arm around his shoulder and kissed his forehead as a warm ache floated through my body. What did this mean? Didn’t matter. It’d be clearer in the morning. I closed my eyes and drifted off.
Fluttering my eyes open, my vision cleared, and I turned my head toward the light streaming in through the slit in the center of the curtains.
Propped on an elbow, Grey stared at me, his eyes puffy and red and brows furrowed.
“Oh, shit.” With a start, my pulse shot through the roof. “Grey, you’re awake.” I lifted onto my elbows and licked my dry lips, an ache pulsing behind my eyes. We’d shared orgasms last night. My eyes widened.
“Why are you in my bed?” He tilted his head and peeked under the covers. “And why are we both naked?” His gaze returned to mine.
“We, uh…” Shit, should I tell him, or leave it be? He had to remember something. “You remember nothing?” I tensed my jaw. This was bad. I should have stopped it. He’d been a lot drunker than I’d thought.
“I…” His cheeks reddened, and he sat up, the covers falling to his waist. Rubbing his forehead with shaky fingers, he said, “No, I don’t remember a thing.”
How can that be? He’d blacked out? But he hadn’t seemed that drunk. He hadn’t even puked. “What’s the last thing you remember?” I studied him. Maybe he chose not to acknowledge what had happened. My chest squeezed as an ache set in.
“We were at the party and went outside to escape the girls, then…” His jaw muscle bulged. “Then nothing.”
“Nothing, like nothing at all? You don’t remember us hiding against the wall or the Uber ride home?
” Or that you pleaded with me to get you off?
Fucking hell. This was bad. I rose to sit against the pillows lying on the headboard.
When he cleaned his dirty laundry, he’d see the cum on his briefs. I had to tell him. “Grey, we—”
“No, I prefer not to know.” He held his palm to me and offered a thin-lipped smile. “It’s all good, man. Last night, when I was wasted, you took care of me and slept with me to ensure I was okay and wouldn’t puke on myself. That’s what happened, right?”
My jaw dropped. So, that was the line he’d given himself? “You asked me to sleep—”
“Sure, I did. You’re a good friend, Malik. The best.” He patted my shoulder. “Fucking hell, I’m thirsty. The desert is crazy. It’s like you have to drink water constantly.”
“Especially when you drink alcohol.” I couldn’t fucking tell him. I had to pretend nothing had happened between us last night. At least for now. Maybe his memories would come back, and when they did, we’d talk.
“Anyway, I’m ordering DoorDash. You want something?” He slipped from the bed and stood, his round ass toward me, and then scrambled to his dresser, dragging underwear and athletic shorts up his legs.
“We have tons of food in the house. I can prepare breakfast.” I crawled out of bed and threw on last night’s briefs and shorts. Fuck, this was awkward. But maybe it was better this way?
“I think I’ll see if Carrie wants to go to dinner and a movie with me tonight.” He strolled to his door and opened it.
My chest pinched with a sharp pain. No fucking way. “Dude, I don’t think they’ll want to hear from us again. We were dicks to them.”
“Yeah? Then I’ll start my invitation with an apology.” He left the room.
I stood there watching him go. What the actual fuck? He didn’t like Carrie. At least, that’s what he said last night. And why hadn’t he invited me to go with him and bring Riley? This was not like him.
After making my way into my room, I changed into fresh underwear and shorts and met Grey in the kitchen.
He filled ground beans and water into the coffeemaker and started it. “I can’t wait for the coffee.” He kept his back toward me. “Where do you think Tex is?”
“Probably at the gym.” He’d stayed in last night, as far as I knew. “I’m sure he thought we’d be in no shape for working out this morning.”
“What do you want from DoorDash?” He held his phone to his face and tapped. “I want an Egg McMuffin from McDonald’s. It’s perfect for a hangover.”
“Get me two.” Fuck it, I wasn’t cooking. I scrubbed my face as I leaned my ass on the counter at the sink. This was messing with my head. Would we just return to normal now? What would happen the next time he got drunk? Would we become friends with drunk benefits?
He seized two mugs from the cabinet, then poured coffee as the brewer finished. “Can you get the creamer?”
“Sure.” Ambling to the refrigerator, I pulled a bottle of creamer out and set it on the counter, stepping into his space.
He distanced himself from me. “The food will be here in a few minutes.” After pouring the creamer into the cups, he handed me one, strolled to the dinette and dropped into a chair. “Think I’ll do some shopping today. I wanted to check out the shops along Mill Avenue.”
“Yeah?” I blew across my coffee and then sipped it. It sounded fun. “I’ve got nothing—”
“Maybe Carrie would like to join me? I can start our date off there.” He drank his coffee. “I’ll text her now.” He tapped his phone as it rested on the dining table.
What the actual fuck? He didn’t like her.
I knew it. I strode to the table and sank into a chair across from him.
It felt odd between us. Something had changed, and I didn’t like it.
Did this have anything to do with the Ella shit?
“Hey, last night you told me you spoke with Julie and there was a woman named Ella your dad set you up with?”
After gnawing his lower lip for a beat, he said, “She was a nice girl. I think I’ll contact her this week and see how she’s doing.”
My heart froze, and I fisted my hand while it rested on my thigh. “So, you’re going to date Carrie and hit up Ella?” He’d been upset about it last night, hadn’t he?
His phone buzzed on the table, and a sly grin worked across his mouth.
“Carrie accepted my apology and wants to meet for lunch on Mill.” With a quick sip of his coffee, he rose.
“I’m taking a quick shower. Can you bring me my food when it arrives?
Should be here any minute.” He strode through the hallway and disappeared.
“Fuck.” Huffing, I hung my head. Had I ruined our relationship? Maybe he remembered us fooling around last night and decided to hyper-focus on women to feel better about it. Hell, I didn’t know.
My mind was a mess. I couldn’t stop thinking about Grey after he’d left on his fucking date, and no amount of sports commentary on the television would change it. I rubbed my chest over my heart. Fuck, it hurt to think of him out with her. What was wrong with me?
The door in the kitchen creaked open to the garage, and Tex lumbered inside, wearing a sleeveless workout shirt and shorts.
"Hey, man." He held a smoothie in his hand. “What a fucking night you had. I knew you two would hook up.” With a snicker, he shook his head and sat beside me on the couch. “I figured you’d give it a week, but whatever. It’s all good.”
With my jaw falling, I stared at him. “What are you talking about?” How did he know?
Patting my thigh, he said, “Did you really think I wouldn’t hear you two going at each other in Grey’s room last night?” He peered around him. “Where the hell is he, anyway?”
“He’s out. On a date. With a fucking woman.” Scoffing, I crossed my arms on my chest. At least I wouldn’t have to hide what happened with Tex.
“Are you shitting me? Why would he do that? Did you leave it as friends with benefits?” With his brows raised, he sipped his smoothie through a straw.
“No, we left it as nothing. He doesn’t remember. He was drunk, and I…I took advantage of him, I guess.” Jesus, it was so not cool. How could I do such a thing? I hung my head and teased a fold in my shorts.
“Wait a minute.” Grabbing the remote, he paused the television show. “That’s not typical of you, Malik, and I observed your behavior around here the last few days. The guy is not straight. Tell me what really happened.”
I inhaled a deep breath, willing the squeezing in my chest to release.
“I don’t know. Everything was cool, but we started drinking shots of tequila, and then we ditched the girls and went outside.
He…” I pursed my lips. I should tell him the details, shouldn’t I?
“We were hiding, and it was clear he was interested in me. His dick was hard.” Heat rushed across my cheeks.
“Go on.” He sipped more of his drink.
“He complained about some woman his dad set him up with back in New York, so I think he was upset about it.” I glanced at Tex, watching me intently.
“When we got home, I helped him to his room and, fuck, he wanted it, Tex.” I straightened my spine.
“He asked for it. He was hard as a rock and kissing me and shit and then he pulled me onto his bed on top of him and he told me…” I should stop there.
“He’s not straight, Malik. I don’t care how drunk he was.” He scoffed a laugh. “Hell, if he was that drunk and still getting it up for you, then it’s even more proof he’s not straight.”
I wrung my hands in my lap. “You think so?” If that was the case, had Grey ever fooled around with other guys? He’d have told me, right? “But this morning, he said he blacked out after we went outside.”
“How convenient.” After setting his empty smoothie on the coffee table, he sank into the couch. “He messed around with you, and he’s having a hard time coming to terms with his new sexuality, so he’s on a date to prove he’s not queer. That’s all it is.”
With a slow nod, I inhaled through the pain in my chest. Hell, it felt like my insides were in a vice grip. Was I jealous of Carrie? Probably. But Grey was my friend, not my lover. Or had I been fooling myself all along? “Did I wreck everything? Will I ever get him back?”
“I don’t know. That’s up to you.” He shifted, lifting his leg onto the cushion between us. “Talk to him. You both have to acknowledge what happened. If he’s struggling with it, I’m sure we can set up a call with Eli. The dude helped so many when he was here, working at the LGBTQ center.”
“Yeah, that’s true.” I ground my molars. But could I revert to a platonic friendship with Grey, or did I want more now that I’d had him? Fuck me, I wanted more. My stomach churned. How would I live with him the entire school year if he stayed distant? It would ruin me.
“What’s going through your head, Malik? You look sick or something.” He uncurled his arm across the back cushions, his hand landing behind my shoulder.
“I fucked up big time, Tex. I think I…I think I want to be with him for real. Not just friends.” An ache rolled through my chest, and I grabbed the throw pillow next to me, hugging it. “What’ll I do if he doesn’t want me back?” The corners of my eyes pricked as a lump formed in my throat.
“Shit.” Tex shifted closer and wrapped an arm around my shoulders, pulling me into his wide chest. “I think he has feelings for you too. I think he just needs to figure his shit out and he’ll come back to you. Have faith.”
“How can I?” My voice cracked. This was horrible. He was pretending nothing had happened, out on a fucking date with Carrie, while I worried and hurt so fucking bad.
“You can, and you will. Give it time. Be the caring, doting friend you’ve always been. If he’s going through some rough shit, he’ll come back to you. You’re the one he leans on. Remember that.”
I nodded against his shoulder, sniffling. “Yeah, okay.”
“But you have to talk to him and acknowledge what happened. Maybe not today, but you can’t allow this to fester.” He rubbed the back of my head. “You can’t let this affect your game.”
“You’re right.” Lifting off him, I swiped the wetness from my eyes. We had to resolve this before the season started. “Thanks, man.” I squeezed his hand.
“Anytime.” His breath caught. “And see if Grey will talk to Eli.”
“I will.” As my chest relaxed, I inhaled deeply. Now, I play the waiting game.