16. Lucas
Chapter 16
Lucas
“ T here you are, sugar!” Dolly called the moment I stepped out of my rental car. Beau was already standing there beside her. “I was gettin’ worried you wouldn’t show!”
As if she could get me to skip a night with Beau.
“I was just lettin’ Beau in on our little date night tonight.”
Beau glanced my way, one eyebrow raised. “It was supposed to be a surprise,” I said, feeling my cheeks heat up. “I thought you might like to see how the best pie in Texas is made.”
“Damn right it’s the best,” Dolly laughed, clapping Beau on the shoulder. “But don’t go stealin’ my recipe now. You got your barbecue, and I got my pie. We can live in peace as long as you don’t move into my territory.”
Beau lifted his hand, making a little locking motion over his lips. “I promise.”
I forced a smile knowing it was me Dolly should be worried about, not Beau. God, I felt like shit stealing from these people. They were some of the best folks I’d ever met. For a brief moment I nearly let the truth slip out, but I forced it back down quickly. I was too deep to back out now. Logan and I both needed this. Even if I came clean now, everyone would hate me. From what Logan told me, rural Texans had long memories. Beau would never forgive me.
Dolly ushered us into the diner, the bell above the door jingling as we entered. The smell of fresh-baked pie and coffee enveloped us, warm and comforting. Beau's arm brushed against mine as we walked, sending a shiver down my spine.
“Alright, boys,” Dolly said, tying an apron around her waist. “Let's get to bakin'.”
“I still can’t believe you’re working on a Sunday,” Beau said. He shot me a teasing glance. “It’s the Lord’s day after all.”
“Well, sugar,” Dolly said, putting on a serious face. “I did a lot of thinkin’ and prayin’ about that. But I realized after a while that this restaurant is my church, and I pray by bakin’.” She leaned over to me, holding her hand up to the side of her mouth as she whispered, “And this church pays me for goin’!”
Beau and I both laughed along with Dolly, loving her fresh take on an old tradition. However, the next moment I caught myself staring as Beau rolled up his sleeves to reveal tanned, muscular forearms. He caught me staring and gave me a shy smile that made my heart skip a beat.
As Dolly led us through the steps of making her famous peach pie, I couldn't help but steal glances at Beau. His brow furrowed in concentration as he carefully crimped the edges of the crust, his strong hands working with surprising gentleness.
The kitchen was warm, filled with the sweet scent of pecans and sugar. As we worked side by side, I found myself hyper-aware of Beau's every movement. The way his hands kneaded the dough, the flex of his biceps as he rolled out the crust. I was so distracted I nearly dropped the bowl of filling I was stirring.
“Careful there, sugar,” Dolly chuckled. “We don't want to waste any of that pecan-y goodness.”
I felt my cheeks flush, hoping she hadn't noticed the real reason for my clumsiness. But when I glanced at Beau, I caught him watching me with a hint of a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.
“Here,” he said softly, stepping closer. “Let me show you a trick.”
He placed his hands over mine on the bowl, guiding them in a smooth, circular motion. His chest pressed against my back, and I could feel the warmth of his breath on my neck. My heart raced at his proximity, and I struggled to focus on the task at hand. Of course, his bulge resting against my ass didn’t help either. I was pretty sure I felt it twitch.
“Like this,” Beau murmured, his deep voice sending shivers down my spine. “Nice and easy.”
I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. We stirred together for a moment longer before Beau stepped away, leaving me feeling both relieved and bereft.
Dolly clapped her hands together. “Well, ain't you two just the cutest pair of bakers I ever did see!” She winked at me, and I felt my face grow even hotter. Beau looked extra nervous himself. “Now, let's get these pies in the oven.”
As we slid the pies onto the rack, the sweet aroma of candied pecans filled the shop. I stepped back from the hot oven, wiping the sweat from my brow. Dolly had given away every secret she had, trusting me fully. And I, despite how much I hated it, remembered every single detail so I could recreate it later.
“Well, I think y’all earned a nice glass of iced tea,” Dolly said, leading both of us back toward the dining room. “Then y’all can tell me how long y’all have been datin’.”
Both Beau and I stopped dead in our tracks. My heart was racing, and I couldn’t force myself to move. Beau, on the other hand, was white as a sheet and looked like he was about to pass out.
Dolly turned back to us, a knowing smile on her face. “Oh, don't look so shocked. I may be old, but I ain't blind. I've seen the way you two look at each other. And that bowl stirrin’ thing? Please.”
Beau's eyes darted nervously between Dolly and me, his face flushed. I could see the panic rising in his expression, his chest heaving with quick, shallow breaths.
“We're not... I mean, we haven't...” Beau stammered, his Texas drawl thicker than usual.
I stepped closer to him, letting my hand brush against his. “It's okay, Beau,” I said softly, hoping to calm him. “I don’t think Dolly’s judging us.”
Dolly nodded, her eyes twinkling. “That's right, sugar. Love is love, and there ain't nothin' wrong with it.” She walked up to Beau giving his arm a squeeze. “It’s alright. I ain’t gonna tell no one if that’s what you want.”
Beau's shoulders relaxed slightly at Dolly's words, but I could still see the tension in his jaw. He swallowed hard, his eyes darting to me before looking back at Dolly.
“I... I appreciate that, Dolly,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “It's just... not many folks 'round here would understand. You know how upset they still are about the whole Amber May fiasco.”
I felt a pang in my chest at the vulnerability in Beau's voice. Without thinking, I reached out and took his hand, intertwining our fingers. He looked at me, surprise and gratitude flickering in his blue eyes.
Dolly smiled warmly at us both. “Well, sugar, times are changin'. And even if they weren't, you two are good boys. Anyone with half a brain can see that.”
She bustled over to the refrigerator, pulling out a pitcher of sweet tea. Her words wrapped around my chest, trying to strangle the life out of me. Here I was, standing in her kitchen as she not only supported Beau, but me as well, and showed us all the hospitality in the world. And yet, I was going to steal from her just to get a promotion. But those student loans hanging over my head, the debt I’d racked up to stay in New York, and the shitty apartment that would cost me a fortune to break the lease on were huge motivators .
Why couldn’t I have met these people sooner? Before all this stupidity even got started. That would’ve been the life. Living on a ranch with Beau, both of us happy and cared for surrounded by family and friends. It was a beautiful fantasy, and one I’d never get to live out.
Dolly poured us each a glass of sweet tea, beckoning us over to the bar. We took a seat on the other side, facing her as she pulled up a stool opposite.
“And if you don’t mind me sayin’ so,” she continued. “I don’t think anyone in this town would have much of a problem with you, Beau. Actually, I think it might help explain some things. And it might get Amber May off your back. That girl’s got talons like a hawk and she knows how to hold on when she wants somethin’.”
Beau's grip on my hand tightened at the mention of Amber May. I could feel the tension radiating off him, his body rigid beside me. I’d never met the woman, but she must’ve been intimidating to make Beau react so strongly.
“I don't know, Dolly,” he said, his voice low and uncertain. “My family... they have certain expectations. And the ranch?—”
“Now, don't you go worryin' about that,” Dolly interrupted, her tone gentle but firm. “Your daddy might be set in his ways, but he loves you somethin' fierce. And as for the ranch, well, there ain't no rule that says two men can't run it just as well as a man and a woman.”
I squeezed Beau's hand, hoping to offer some comfort. “She's right, you know,” I said softly. “You shouldn't have to hide who you are.”
Beau turned to look at me, his blue eyes searching mine. For a moment, I saw a flicker of hope there, quickly replaced by fear and uncertainty.
“It ain't that simple,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “This town... it's all I've ever known. The ranch has been in my family for generations. I can't just...”
He trailed off, looking down at our intertwined hands. I could feel the slight tremor in his fingers, the weight of his internal struggle.
Dolly reached across the counter, placing her weathered hand on top of ours. “Now listen here, Beau Turner. You're one of the best men I know in this town. Hardworking, kind, always willing to lend a hand. If anyone has a problem with who you love, well, they'll have to answer to me and probably a fair few other people too.”
Beau’s gaze didn’t lift to Dolly. Instead, he looked at me. “And… well… after the fair is over… you’re leavin’. You’ve got that job and that big city to go home to. I can’t leave Sagebrush,” he said, his eyes looking like they were on the verge of tears. “This is my home. But I can’t ask you to stay either. That’s just… it’s not right.”
I sat there for a long moment, reeling from the realization that I’d just made. It seemed, quite without meaning to, I’d managed to not only get this cowboy out of his shell, but also somehow made him start falling in love with me. People didn’t say things like that when they were just interested in sex. Beau, it seemed, wanted a lot more from me. Unfortunately, for different reasons, both of us knew it could never be.
“I… I don’t know what to say, Beau,” I replied at last. “I like you and this town is fine but… well… I’ve spent so much time building a life in New York…”
“I know,” he nodded, pulling his hand away from mine. The loss made my heart sink. “That’s why I can’t ask you to stay. Or to sit here in this dusty town and wait around for me to grow a pair and tell everyone who and what I am. Hell, I don’t know if I’ll ever be that brave.”
“Beau… I…” I froze up, catching myself on the verge of telling him the truth about everything once more. But just as the words formed on my lips, I forced them away. “I need to go,” I said, getting up from my chair.
“What about the pies, sugar?” Dolly said, her brows furrowed.
“I… I’m sorry.”
I only glanced back at Beau, the hurt in his eyes cutting me to the core. But I couldn’t let them see me break down, couldn’t let them know how much of a raging asshole I was. Instead, I ran out of there as fast as I could, hot tears falling down my cheeks the moment I was in my car.
I had to get out of Sagebrush. If I stayed any longer, I didn’t think I’d survive.
So, throwing my rental car into gear, I started driving north, too lost in my own thoughts to know where I was going or what I was going to do when I got there.