23. Beau
Chapter 23
Beau
“ C ongratulations Beau,” Amber May said, staring me and Lucas down with a look that I knew could only mean trouble. “I knew you could do it.”
“Thank you, Amber May,” I replied, trying to keep my cool. “I’m sorry to rush off but Lucas and I?—”
“I have an offer for you, Beau,” she said, reaching a hand into her pocket. A moment later she withdrew a black velvet box and held it out to Beau. “One I’d like you to think real long and hard about before you answer.” She flipped the box open, revealing a simple gold band inside. “I hear you’ve got a lot of dreams for that ranch of yours. I can make all those come true if you give me a chance.”
Lucas’s grip on my hand tightened and I could see his face turn red out of the corner of my eye.
“The answer is the same as last time Amber May,” I said without missing a beat. “No.”
“And why’s that? This city slicker gonna pay for it all? Even though he’s drowning in student loans and makes garbage wages at that firm he works for?”
Clearly, Amber May had done some digging about Lucas.
“You b?—”
I put a hand over Lucas’s mouth before he could finish the word.
“No,” I replied politely. “I’m gonna pay for it myself.”
She chuckled lightly. “With what money? Your family ranch is so far in debt you’ll be lucky to pay it off before you die even if you live to be a hundred.” She glanced at Lucas with a scoff. “And he’s never gonna get ahead with that pathetic job of his. I bet he can’t even afford a ticket to fly out and see you again.”
I glanced around at the crowd pressing in from all sides. Amber May could spill personal information about me as much as she wanted. I didn’t care. But I didn’t appreciate her dragging Lucas into it as well. In fact, it was really starting to piss me off.
“Amber May,” I said, taking a deep breath. “I have been good, and kind, and patient with you. But I will not tolerate you speakin’ badly about my… my friend.”
“Friend?!” she laughed. “Please! You can’t even admit what you are!” Her eyes darkened as she looked my way. “And if you marry me, you’ll never have to.”
I looked over at Lucas, feeling the fear well up inside me. She was right of course, I’d never been able to say it out loud. Even the thought of doing it made my blood run cold. And now there were hundreds of eyes and ears on me, watching and waiting for my response. If I turned Amber May down again, I’d give myself away and those consequences would chase me for the rest of my life. But if I accepted her offer, I’d be miserable until the day I died.
“I…” I began. “I am?—”
“Amber May Johnson!” a voice bellowed over the crowd.
I turned to look with everyone else and saw the same man who’d presented me with the award pushing his way through the crowd toward us. I’d known Mr. Johnson my whole life of course, him and Pa were good friends. And he was also Amber May’s father.
“Daddy,” she said, looking a bit worried. “I was just?—”
“I know exactly what you were doin’,” he shot back, cutting her off. “You were tellin’ this boy and everyone listenin’ his family’s personal financial information. The same information that is protected by law and has to remain private.” He stopped in front of her, both hands on his hips and a stern look on his face. “Are you tryin’ to put me out of business?”
Amber May’s demeanor shifted in an instant. “No Daddy. I just?—”
“Just wanted to badger this boy a bit more when he already done told you no to begin with.” Mr. Johnson turned to me, his handlebar mustache twitching. “Do you wanna marry my daughter?”
“I… uh…” I glanced at Lucas, taking a breath. “No sir. I don’t reckon I do.”
Mr. Johnson glanced down at my hand that was still intertwined with Lucas’s. “I figured as much.” He turned back to his daughter. “Now put that ring away and stop actin’ like a damn fool in front of all these people. You’re makin’ our entire family look disgraceful.”
“Sorry Daddy…”
“I don’t wanna hear it, darlin’,” he replied, turning away from her once more. “Not right now. You’ve got an awful lot of growin’ up to do still.”
Amber May looked thoroughly defeated, and I found myself almost feeling bad for her. But I’d known her father my whole life. He was the most loving and doting man I ever met. Driving him to disappointment meant Amber May had very much overstepped her bounds.
“Now listen here, young man,” he continued, looking at me. “I think this idea of yours really has some merit, and I’d be willin’ to help you get that goin’ if you can look past my daughter’s behavior today. I sincerely apologize.”
Amber May seemed to get smaller and smaller behind him. I couldn’t help but smile as I offered up my hand to shake. “I’d be more than happy to discuss that possibility, sir.”
Mr. Johnson smiled, taking my hand. “I’m glad to hear it my boy.” His gripped tightened as he pulled me in. “And just between you and me, I had a guy friend like you before I met Amber’s mother. Some of the most peaceful days of my life.”
I couldn’t help gawking slightly as he pulled back and gave me a wink. He turned back to Amber May and with a shooing motion, ushered her away from the crowd. However, there were still plenty of people pointing and whispering and staring at me and Lucas. But I wasn’t about to let go of that boy’s hand. Pulling him along, I led him out of the crowd and to the back of the fairgrounds where the animal barns were at, far from the lights of the midway.
As soon as we were behind the biggest horse barn and all alone in the dark, I grabbed his waist and pulled him in, kissing him hard on the mouth. Before I knew it, his hands were under my shirt while mine moved down to his ass. It seemed the rush of emotions had gotten the better of us both.
“Wait,” Lucas said, pulling away from me. “We… We can’t do this.”
“Nobody will see,” I replied, tightening my grip on him.
“No. That’s not what I meant.”
I let go of him immediately, sensing something was off. “What’s wrong, city boy?” I asked, cocking my head to the side. “You okay?”
Lucas took a deep breath, his green eyes searching mine in the dim light. “Beau, I... I can't do this anymore. The sneaking around, the hiding. What just happened out there with Amber May... it made me realize something.”
My heart sank. “What do you mean?”
He ran a hand through his dark hair, looking conflicted. “I care about you. A lot. And I can’t keep lying to you anymore.”
I felt my heart skip a beat. “Lying to me? What do you mean?”
Lucas took a shaky breath, his eyes darting away from mine. “I... I'm not who you think I am, Beau. I haven't been completely honest with you.”
My stomach dropped. “What are you talkin' about?”
He stepped back, creating distance between us. “I'm not really here to scout for food festivals.” He looked pained as he spoke, each word hurting him more than the last. “I work for Harvest Foods in New York.”
“The frozen dinner company?”
He nodded. “And they sent me and Logan here to... to steal recipes from… well from people like you.”
I felt like I'd been punched in the gut. “You... what?”
Lucas looked miserable. “My boss wanted to get real southern food for our next summer line… without paying for it.” He swallowed hard. “When I met you, I thought... I thought maybe I could get close to you, learn about your barbecue secrets and take them back. But then I actually fell for you and I...” His voice cracked. “And I realized?—”
“Wait a second,” I said, cutting him off. “You were gonna steal from me? From the very beginning?”
Lucas bit his lower lip, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. “Yes. But I’m not going to now?—”
“So, the only reason you talked to me… the reason you came to my house for those riding lessons… was just to trick me?”
Lucas's face crumpled, tears now falling freely. “No, Beau, it's not like that. I mean, yes, at first, but?—”
I stepped back, feeling like the ground was shifting beneath my feet. The whole world was crumbling around me. “So, everything between us... it was all a lie?”
“No!” Lucas reached for me, but I jerked away. “Beau, please. Yes, I came here with bad intentions, but what we have is real. I swear it.”
I shook my head, trying to process this betrayal. “How can I believe anything you say now?”
Lucas's voice was desperate. “Because I'm telling you the truth now, even though it might cost me everything. I couldn't keep lying to you. I... I love you, Beau.”
Those words, which should have made my heart soar, now felt like a knife twisting in my chest. I stared at Lucas, my mind reeling. The man I'd fallen for, the one who'd made me feel things I'd never felt before, had been lying to me this whole time. My chest tightened, making it hard to breathe.
“You love me?” I finally managed to choke out. “How can you say that after what you just told me?”
Lucas took a step towards me, his green eyes pleading. “Because it's true, Beau. I know I messed up, I know I hurt you, but my feelings for you are real.”
I backed away, shaking my head. “I don't know what to believe anymore. How do I know this isn't just another lie?”
“It's not, I swear,” Lucas said, his voice cracking. “I'll quit my job, I'll move here, I'll do whatever it takes to prove to you that I'm telling the truth.”
I closed my eyes, trying to steady my breathing. My mind was racing, emotions swirling like a tornado inside me. Part of me wanted to believe Lucas, to grab him and never let go. But the pain of his betrayal was too fresh, too raw. It cut me right down to my soul. For the first time in my life, I finally let myself have what I’d always wanted. And it had bitten me in the ass worse than anything I could ever imagine.
“I need time,” I said finally, my voice barely above a whisper. “I can't... I can't process all this right now.”
Lucas nodded, wiping at his tears. “I'm so sorry, Beau. I never meant to hurt you…”
“Yeah, well, you did,” I replied, my voice harsher than I intended. I took a deep breath, trying to calm myself. “Look, I think it's best if you leave. Go back to New York, or wherever. Just... just go.”
The pain in Lucas's eyes was palpable, but I couldn't bring myself to care. My own heart felt like it was being ripped apart.
“Beau, please...” Lucas reached for me again, but I stepped back.
“Don't,” I said, my voice low and dangerous. “Just don't.”
I turned and walked away, leaving Lucas standing alone in the shadows behind the barn. My boots kicked up dust as I strode across the fairgrounds, barely noticing the lingering crowds or the cheerful carnival music. Everything felt hollow now .
I made it to my truck and climbed in, throwing my hat in fury at the passenger seat where I wished Lucas was sitting. I gripped the steering wheel so tight my knuckles turned white. The engine roared to life, and I peeled out of the parking lot, not caring who I startled.
As I drove, the familiar country roads blurred past, my mind a jumble of emotions. Anger, betrayal, heartbreak - they all churned inside me like a violent storm. The taste of Lucas's kiss still lingered on my lips, now bitter and tainted by his lies.
I found myself pulling off onto a secluded dirt road, one I'd driven down countless times when I needed to clear my head. The truck came to a stop in a clearing overlooking the rolling hills of Sagebrush. In the moonlight, the prairie grass swayed gently, oblivious to the turmoil raging inside me.
I got out, slamming the door harder than necessary, and leaned against the hood. The cool metal against my back was grounding, reminding me that this wasn't some horrible nightmare. This was real.
“Goddammit!” I yelled into the night sky full of stars that reminded me so much of his eyes now.
And then I sank down into the grass, pulling my knees tight to my chest. My heart was broken. More than I thought possible. I’d come so close to happiness, even tasted it for a while. And now all that potential was dead inside me. I leaned forward, tears streaming down my face.
At least, out here alone under the endless Texas night, nobody could see a cowboy cry.