5. Luna
5
LUNA
Lo Spietato of Las Vegas.
Andre’s words stayed with me for the rest of the night. I barely remembered anything else that happened at dinner or the conversation that went around.
Any doubt that Massimo might not eat me alive had quickly evaporated.
He wouldn’t have earned his reputation if he were a nice man. After dinner, the men went off to the office to talk and have drinks while the women were expected to retire early for the night. I was glad about that, but I still needed to bid Massimo, his brothers, and Emilio, good night. The quick kiss Massimo pressed against my cheek was awkward and nerve-wracking all at once. His lips were surprisingly soft, and he smelled nice, but all that was tainted by my fear of the man.
I held still and closed my eyes briefly at the contact, and once all that was done, it took everything in me not to run out of there and not stop until I got to my room.
Lina followed close behind me, looking happy.
I knew why.
She escaped the marriage to a monster, and I was now the sacrificial lamb.
“He’s going to break you on your wedding night,” she singsonged, leaving for her room before I could say anything in retort. I didn’t have anything I could say to her, even if she had stayed. I stood in the hallway and stared after her, lingering far longer than I should. Then, I remembered there were strange men in the house, and I quickly moved to my room.
I got ready for bed on autopilot. I didn’t remember much of it, only that I had turned on the water as hot as I could stand and rubbed my skin raw, hoping to be transported to another place, another life where I was someone who had control over her life and not… me .
I didn’t want to be me anymore.
I crawled under the cover after that and pulled the blanket over my head, closing my eyes and trying to sleep, attempting to leave this reality behind.
I dreamed of forest-green eyes chasing me in the woods.
My limbs felt useless as I tried to outrun the monster. I woke up in a cold sweat just before the monster caught me and devoured me whole.
I stood in the bridal suite alone, staring at myself in the mirror. I had my hair and makeup done already, and the women who helped me had left.
I was waiting for Mom to come by and help me put on the dress.
It was a beautiful princess-style wedding dress that fitted me well and showed off what little curves I had in the best way possible. The lacy long sleeves molded around my arms, and the dress was the perfect blend of modesty and elegance.
Too bad I didn’t feel like a princess, and this wasn’t a fairy tale.
There was no Prince Charming. I looked up at the clock hanging off the wall behind me through the mirror.
Mom was supposed to be here by now. What if… what if she wasn’t coming?
There was no way I could put the dress on myself. There were just too many buttons on the back.
What if I ended up being late to the wedding?
The only thing worse than marrying Massimo De Luca was being late to my wedding with the man.
I wiped my hands nervously down the bathrobe I had on.
Moving over to the doorway, I opened it and peeked my head out. I pulled up short when I saw the two guards who had come with Massimo the night of the dinner. They frowned down at me, making me feel nauseous.
“Is there anything you need, madame?” one of them asked me. I didn’t know the name of either man.
“Um, can you find my mother? I need her help.”
The men glanced at each other before one nodded and walked away. I moved back inside my room and closed the door, pacing around and trying to control my nerves.
Fifteen minutes later, a knock finally came at the door. I rushed forward, opening it and expecting to see my mother.
Instead, Massimo stood there, already dressed in his wedding suit, looking so dangerously handsome that I was left speechless for a long second.
“Luca said you needed help,” Massimo said when I couldn’t make my mouth work right.
I blinked. “I, uh, I was looking for my mom.”
“We can’t find her. What do you need help with?”
I blanched. He was the last person I would want help from with this.
His frown deepened as he stepped inside the room, leaving no other option than for me to back up a step, lest I wanted him to touch me.
Right away, the room that had been spacious enough seemed to have shrunk in on itself. I shifted on my feet, very aware of the fact that I was wearing white lingerie underneath this really thin robe. I pulled the fabric tighter against me, and Massimo took in the move without saying anything.
“What do you need help with?” he asked again.
“You’re-you’re going to help me?” I sputtered out.
His lips twisted, pulling the scars on his face. It almost looked like he was amused. “I’m here, aren’t I?”
I shook my head. “You can’t.”
“Why not?”
Why not? Did he really ask me that? He didn’t even know what I needed help with, and I just… couldn’t.
“Luna.”
My breath caught at the sound of my name coming from his lips. I shook my head.
He stepped closer to me, and I resisted the urge to move back, to run away. There was nowhere to run and hide in this small room. I was trapped in here with him.
He cupped my shoulders with both hands. I flinched, and he firmed his grip marginally.
“Luna?”
“I… I just need my mom.”
Annoyance crossed over his face, and I almost apologized right then and there. “We can’t find your mom. So what do you need help with?”
There was no disguising the impatience in his voice. And the last thing I wanted to do was poke the monster. I looked down at his black tie, then at the red rose attached to his side.
“I need help getting into my dress,” I whispered, tears burning my eyes.
He frowned, his gaze moving over to the wedding dress and then back to me.
He nodded. “I can help with that.”
I looked up at him in surprise. “You can’t help me with that!”
“Why not? Admittedly, I am better at removing a woman’s clothes than I am helping them into it.”
I grimaced. Was this his way of lightening the mood? It wasn’t working, and I certainly didn’t need the reminder of how much more experienced he was than me.
He cursed softly under his breath, not helping with my racing heart.
“Bad joke,” he said, probably as a way of apology. I blinked.
“I—it’s bad luck to see me in my wedding dress before the wedding,” I said, trying again.
“You really believe in that superstition crap?”
Well, when he said it like that, I would feel pretty stupid admitting to believing it. So I said nothing.
He let out a small sigh. “It’ll be fine.”
“How do you know?”
“I know,” he said, sounding confident. I wished I had his confidence.
He straightened and pulled away from me. Then, walking over to the dress, he lifted it from where it was draped on the back of a recliner and brought it to me.
“Put it on, Luna.”
Were we really doing this?
“Close your eyes,” I said softly.
“Close my eyes?” He seemed incredulous that I would even ask this.
I didn’t say anything, waiting for him. He made a small sound, which I thought might be a cross between a snort and a growl, before his eyes fell shut. I couldn’t tell if he was peeking or not. I decided to chance it and threw the robe off before grabbing the dress. I stumbled my way into it. There was just so much fabric.
Finally, I was able to pull it on and even managed to pull the zipper up halfway.
“Okay,” I said, giving him my back. “You can help me.”
A strange sound escaped his lips before I felt him walk up close to me, heat emanating from him and making me feel flushed. I looked at the mirror, taking in our reflection. Our size differences were much more prominent now that I could see us fully and with him standing so close.
I didn’t have my heels on, which I probably should have put on before I put on the dress, but that would be my problem when he left.
His eyes strayed down the naked skin on my back, making it feel hot just as he started to help me with the buttons.
I held still, my breath catching in my lungs when I felt his fingertips on my bare skin. I didn’t remember it taking this long when we tried it on at the dress shop, and the lady helped me. But this felt endless.
Finally, I felt the last button close, only for the immediate silence in the room to be so pronounced and so uncomfortable, I didn’t know what to do with myself.
Do I turn around and thank him? Do I ask him to leave? Do you even ask a man like Massimo De Luca to leave? He seemed like the kind of man who was used to doing whatever he wanted, and why wouldn’t that be the case?
If I had his strength, I probably would be the same way. Only now, his strength was used to show just how little power I did have in this transaction, leaving me… flailing.
I flinched when I felt his lips pressed against the back of my neck. “I should hate the idea of this marriage, considering it was Enzo who set it up,” Massimo muttered against my skin. “But fuck, I don’t mind the idea of marrying you at all. And after tonight, you will be utterly and undeniably mine .”
I tried not to show my fear over the possessiveness in his voice as I thought over the first part of his sentence.
I frowned. Did he and his uncle not get along? Then why did Enzo go out of his way to set up a marriage for Massimo that would do nothing but give the De Lucas a relationship with the Lombardis? A tenuous relationship that could no doubt be torn apart at the seams over a little picking, but it was a relationship, nonetheless. One that I was sure Massimo would use to his full advantage.
Slowly, he cupped my shoulders once more and turned me around to face him.
I couldn’t keep eye contact for more than a handful of seconds before I directed my gaze back to his tie.
He lifted his fingers beneath my chin until I looked at him.
“Okay?”
I nodded, wondering why it would matter to him if I was okay or not. Perhaps he just didn’t want me to lose it before the wedding. Or during it, which made sense. I wasn’t going to lose it. I was trained better than that.
“The wedding is in thirty minutes,” I said softly.
His brow pulled together slightly as if he didn’t know why I was stating the obvious. He nodded. “Yes.”
“And then I’ll be going back to Las Vegas with you.”
“Yes. I’m sorry if you were expecting to stay with your family for some time, but there are things I need to do back in Las Vegas that can’t wait.”
“I don’t want to stay with them.”
He looked at me curiously, but I wasn’t going to explain my family dynamic to a stranger. And that was what Massimo was to me—husband or not.
A stranger.
If I had my way, I would never see any of them again. My heart pinched at the thought. A part of me felt sad that Mom and I were never closer, unlike her and Lina.
Perhaps it was for the best.
“And we’re supposed to share our first kiss as husband and wife in front of all those people.”
People I didn’t know nor did I care for.
He took a step closer to me, causing my heart to race. My first kiss should be the last thing I worry about, but somehow, with everything unraveling around me, leaving little to no control, I just…
I just wanted to have a say in this.
“Yes, I know,” he said, his voice soft.
“It would be my first kiss.”
He nodded.
“I don’t want my first kiss to be in front of all those people.”
“What are you saying, Luna?”
My heart raced over what I planned on doing. I shouldn’t be doing this… but Massimo was here and?—
I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him down until I could press my lips against his.
He tensed against me but didn’t pull away.
I pressed harder, taking in the taste of him. How strange it was to feel him so intimately.
And I didn’t know what all the fuss was about. It was nothing more than a simple contact.
I pulled away. “Now my first kiss won’t be in front of other people.”
My voice was nothing more than a mere whisper.
I turned away before he could say anything or, worse, yell at me for touching him without his permission. It would be his right, especially if he felt I had violated his personal boundaries in some way.
But he didn’t yell at me.
Instead, he turned me around to face him once more. His eyes were dark and animated as he tightened his arm around my waist.
My breath caught, and my stomach plummeted to the ground.
“That wasn’t a kiss,” he growled. And then he slammed his lips against mine. I gasped, and he took full advantage of that and plunged his tongue inside.
Heat instantly exploded from the contact, and I felt tingly on the inside.
Fuck.
He deepened the kiss, furthering the strange sensation. My hands automatically moved up and gripped his biceps, my nails digging into him with every swipe of his tongue, making my stomach drop even further as a pulsating feeling started there and moved further down .
God.
What was he doing to me? Why was I feeling like this… like I was falling and flying at the same time?
This.
This was what all the fuss had been about.
He kissed me with fervor. With passion. His tongue moved confidently against mine as he delved deeper and devoured me. And he didn’t seem to mind that I wasn’t as confident as him.
He kissed me like he owned me. Like there would be no part of me that would ever belong to me again. They were his. His for the taking. His to do with however he liked, and I would never get them back.
I didn’t know if I wanted to be owned by a man like Massimo De Luca, yet somehow, the thought of the fall felt inevitable. A sliver of fear worked its way up my spine as he continued to kiss me, causing the pulsating to become more pronounced, causing me to feel hot all over, and making it so I couldn’t think straight.
I gripped his shoulder unconsciously, and he pulled my hands away. He then took my wrists in one hand and held them captive between us. His other hand moved around me, pressing up against my shoulder blades and pushing me closer to him.
I hummed from the move, flexing my wrists a little, but his hold was firm. There was no way for me to escape as he took control of the kiss.
He pushed me back until I hit the wall. I gasped as he pressed up against me, pulling my wrists up so they were held above my head, and I could feel him.
Could feel all of him.
He was hard.
Just from the kiss alone?
How?
He kissed me harder.
What had I started? I could have just let him go, let him give me my first kiss in front of witnesses, but this?
No one was around to stop him.
One hand reached between us and molded around my breast.
I turned away from the kiss and looked up into his dark-green eyes, not knowing what to say. He squeezed my breast once, twice, his eyes darkening further with hunger.
I didn’t stop him.
The pulse at my center grew heavy.
He bent down and kissed me once more, making me forget about everything, including my good sense. I would have let him kiss me forever, and it wouldn’t be because I was afraid of him, although…
When he pulled away, I was breathing heavily against him.
His lips were no more than a few inches away from mine, the air between us mingling.
I kept my eyes closed, so afraid to open them and see him. Afraid of what might happen next.
He pressed his thumb against my lips, which felt swollen, before he whispered, “Fuck,” and kissed me a third time, this kiss much quicker than the first but just as thrilling. A zing of electricity shot out all over my body, making my skin pulse.
“This,” he said roughly. “This is a kiss.”
He pulled away, leaving me cold and empty. I opened my eyes and took him in. Somehow, the scars on his face looked more pronounced, and his green eyes practically glowed. My fear deepened, and I crossed my arms behind my back to hide the tremor.
He took me in from head to toe.
“I’ll see you up at the altar.” His voice was nearly a growl, the command in it unmistakable. He would see me up at the altar, no matter what.
And with that, he walked out the door, closing it quietly behind him. I still flinched from the click, wondering what the hell I had just done, initiating that first kiss.
Andre stood beside me at the entrance of the church.
This was an Italian wedding, so it could not have taken place anywhere other than a church. Most made men were… religious.
The irony wasn’t lost on anyone.
And there was just something comical about it all. As if the men and even the women in attendance really followed the teachings of the church. As if they would let a thing like spending an eternity in hell stop them from indulging in all the vices. All the sins were in a bid to gain power and more power.
Andre hooked his arm around me, and I tensed. He shot me a hard look.
“Still so fucking skittish. Don’t fucking embarrass me, girl.”
I bit the inside of my cheek as all the memories of the hell I’d endured in his house came to the forefront of my mind. All the abuse, both physical and verbal, flashed over, much like a movie.
About that time he had slapped me until I fell onto the kitchen floor because he caught a boy talking to me during a family event, calling me a slut and telling me not to tarnish his family name. Both Mom and Lina had been present, and while Lina smiled, getting some sort of sadistic pleasure from seeing me hurt, it was Mom’s apathy that cut the deepest.
“You don’t have to worry about that. After today, I will no longer be a part of the Lombardi household.”
He tightened his grip on me, and I gritted my teeth to keep from crying out in pain.
“How brave you are, now that you’re marrying the Las Vegas beast.”
“Not brave,” I said, keeping my voice even. “I’m simply telling the truth.”
“You little bitch?—”
His voice was cut off when the music began, indicating the start of the wedding. I walked forward, forcing him to follow, else he would be left behind.
I looked at him sideways, finding the fake smile he plastered on, but the anger remained in his eyes, and I was petty enough to have some satisfaction from that.
I was about halfway down the aisle when the reality of my situation finally hit home. I might be able to escape Andre, but now I had a bigger monster to contend with. An unknown monster, and somehow, that just felt worse.
I avoided looking up at the front.
My eyes took in all the people in attendance. I didn’t recognize anyone from the groom’s side, and it wasn’t all that better from the bride’s side either. I was merely a daughter—a stepdaughter at that—which meant I was mostly kept away from the family business . I barely knew anyone in the Famiglia, and those I did know, I wished I didn’t.
Mom was sitting in front, her eyes wet and a bright smile on her face. What a great actress she was. Anyone who looked at her would think she truly cared about me.
I quickly looked away and up toward the front. Lina was my maid of honor. Like much of everything about this union, I didn’t have a say. Next to Lina was Massimo’s sister, Giulia. I had only met the woman once, the night before the wedding, when she finally made it here with her brother Matteo. She was like the female version of Massimo, but without the scars and roughness. She was much more delicate than I thought a mafia princess should look. Her green eyes were nearly identical to her brother’s, and they stood out in stark contrast to her beautiful tan skin, making them even more mesmerizing than I thought possible. I had felt less than standing next to her.
Another woman stood beside Giulia. I recognized her as Francesca, the eldest daughter of one of Emilio’s capos.
I wasn’t close with her, but since Massimo had his three brothers up with him as his groomsmen, they wanted to make it look more balanced, so I had three women on my side as well, two of whom I didn’t know very well, and one whom I would have preferred not show up to the wedding at all.
My cheeks tightened from both embarrassment and pain.
How sad was this?
I blinked and took in Massimo’s brothers. They were all handsome, tall, and powerful-looking. Elio and Romeo looked the most alike, while Matteo was a beautiful mix of all his siblings. Definitely the most carefree, or at least, what he portrayed to other people, the most charming, and from all the rumors, quite the player.
When he caught my eye, he smiled and winked at me. I quickly looked away, then shifted my gaze to Massimo and stayed on him. He was looking right at me, his face giving nothing away.
He could be attending an important meeting, or he could be bored out of his mind, or he could be attending a funeral. With about as much emotion as he was displaying, any of those were possible.
My eyes moved down to his lips on their own accord, and I thought back to our kiss. My skin flushed hotter at the memory, and I hoped the makeup did its job and didn’t show too much.
Finally, we were there.
Massimo reached and took me from Andre’s arms without waiting for the other man to say anything.
If Andre felt disrespected over the display, I couldn’t tell, mostly because there was this roaring in my ears that had blocked out most of the noise.
Massimo held me close and turned me to face him as the ceremony began.
I let my gaze stray down to his nose and held it there, so sure his eyes would have the power to undo me completely, and that was the last thing I wanted or needed.
We exchanged the rings, and I did well moving along and pretending I wasn’t on the verge of freaking out. I nearly dropped Massimo’s ring when I grabbed his hand to put it on, only to see how much bigger they were compared to mine. How much damage they could do. He could easily wrap them around my neck and squeeze until…
I shoved away the thought quickly and slid the ring on.
Massimo did the same to me, and I automatically felt the weight of the ring bearing me down.
“You may now kiss the bride,” the priest said.
Massimo stepped close to me and pressed his lips against mine, pulling away quickly. I should have expected it, considering we kissed not too long before, but there was still that sensation of his lips on mine that made them tingle and made me feel lightheaded when he pulled away.
I clung to him, afraid my legs might not work, just as he turned us around to face everyone, and the sound of loud applause greeted us. I could hear Matteo cheering nearby, and I looked around, dazed.
This was it.
I was now married to Massimo De Luca.