25. Luna
25
LUNA
I woke up with a pounding headache.
It had been a week since Massimo came back from his trip to New York.
A week since Marco was here and…
It had been a week of restless nights and not feeling like myself.
I felt…
Weak and useless.
And scared.
And angry.
It didn’t help that Massimo was treating me like I was made of the world’s most fragile glass.
I never asked why Massimo had come back to me with his knuckles bruised and bloodied. I didn’t ask him what had happened with Marco, and I didn’t care to. If it made me a bad person, then so be it.
Massimo had coddled me after for the entire week.
Not that I didn’t like it, but I wanted things back to the way they were before.
I didn’t want to be coddled, as if this horrendous thing that had happened to me had broken me. It didn’t.
I was stronger than that, wasn’t I?
Massimo came into the room carrying a tray holding a bowl of soup. Steam billowed from the top, touching Massimo’s face. He placed the tray on the bed and sat down, grabbing my hand. He brought me breakfast in bed—or was it dinner?
Whatever time it was, I didn’t think I was so incapable of getting up that he needed to do this.
A tinge of irritation moved up my spine, surprising me.
I couldn’t remember a time when I was ever annoyed at Massimo. But I was now.
I looked at the steaming bowl of soup, then back up at Massimo’s concerned face.
“I can feed myself, you know,” I said more sharply than intended.
Massimo blinked, taken aback by my tone. “I know, principessa . I just thought…”
The uncertainty in his voice was something I never thought I would hear from him.
“You thought I was too weak and broken to even get out of bed?” I finished. As soon as the words left my mouth, I regretted them. Massimo had been nothing but caring and attentive this past week. But a part of me bristled at being treated like an invalid.
Massimo’s expression shuttered, his eyes going cold. “That’s not what I thought at all.”
I sighed, running a hand through my tangled hair. It wasn’t like I could blame him. I hadn’t left the bed since this morning. I wanted to stay here and wallow a bit in self-pity, but I didn’t want Massimo to pity me… Now I wasn’t sure I was making sense even to myself.
I looked away, unable to meet Massimo’s piercing gaze. The silence stretched between us, heavy and oppressive. I could feel the tension radiating off him in waves.
“I’m sorry,” I said, feeling a rush of conflicting emotions. “I just… I don’t want to be treated like I’m broken.”
Massimo’s jaw clenched. “You’re not broken, Luna. But what happened was traumatic. I’m just trying to take care of you.”
His calm tone sparked something in me—a mix of frustration and defiance that had been simmering all week. “By smothering me? I don’t need to be taken care of like I’m some fragile doll!” I snapped, throwing off the covers and standing up. The words came out harsher than I intended, but I couldn’t seem to make myself stop. Just stop.
“That’s not what I’m doing,” Massimo said, his voice low and controlled. But I could see the tension in his shoulders, the way his hands clenched into fists.
“Isn’t it? You’ve barely let me out of your sight for a week. You bring me every meal, and you hover constantly. I can’t even go to the bathroom without you hovering outside as if you think I might fall. I. Won’t. Break.”
What had made it worse was that throughout all of this, he hadn’t touched me. Sure, he held me at night. He kissed my cheek, the back of my hands, the top of my head… but nothing more than that. And I missed it. I missed him. I missed the intimacy the very act brought, but how did he think I could go about asking for it?
His eyes flashed dangerously. “You think I don’t know that? You think I enjoy seeing you like this—barely eating, barely sleeping, jumping at every little sound?”
I hadn’t realized he had noticed all those things. I had thought I hid it well from him. The fact that he picked up on it just pissed me off.
“Maybe I’m just reacting to you,” I said. He was treating me like I was fragile, so I would start acting like I was.
He frowned. “What do you mean?”
“You’ve not touched me all week.”
His frown deepened. “I’ve touched you, baby.”
I shook my head. He wasn’t getting it. “Not like how you used to. We haven’t had sex in over a week!”
He pulled back, shocked. I’d shocked myself as well. And I couldn’t believe I’d said that. But it was like a word vomit. I couldn’t seem to make myself stop.
“Don’t you like me anymore? Don’t you find me attractive? Or do you not want to touch me because you think I’m dirty? Because of what Marco did. He didn’t…”
I looked away, unable to finish the sentence. Of course Massimo knew Marco didn’t rape me, but there was just something so… cautious about the way he’d been, I couldn’t help but question.
“Baby, no,” he said, sounding just as heartbroken as I felt. “I would never think that.”
But could I believe him? I didn’t know. I didn’t know anything.
I moved away from him, careful not to knock the bowl of soup on the bed, and climbed off it. He tried to grab me, but I saw him coming and dodged away.
I was sure he could have caught me had he really been trying, but there was still something controlling about the way he was treating me, and he missed.
“Where are you going?” he asked.
“Away from you,” I answered sullenly. The last thing I saw was his green eyes widening in surprise. I turned away from the bedroom door, taking him away from my sight. I rushed down the stairs and headed for the back door, which led to an enormous landscape.
I hadn’t explored the area thoroughly, so I was just turning blindly around, trying to remember some of the places I had visited in my brief times here, but my mind was nothing more than a jumbled mess.
My heart pounded in my chest as I ran, the cool evening air whipping against my face. The grass was damp beneath my bare feet. I didn’t dare look back, afraid I’d see him following me.
The landscape stretched out before me, a patchwork of uneven terrain and clusters of trees that looked like scary shadows coming at me. It was getting too dark to see, but I knew there was metal fencing around the property to keep people from wandering in and out.
Not that I had planned on going anywhere. I just wanted to get some fresh air and think better. I wanted to get my tumultuous emotions under control.
And as if God was laughing at me, lightning struck from a distance in the sky, and the scent in the air changed. I could smell rain coming.
In the fading light, everything took on an ethereal quality, as if I had stepped into another world entirely. I veered off to the left on instinct, though I wasn’t sure what my plan was.
As I reached the edge of the small grove, I finally allowed myself to slow down and catch my breath. My lungs burned, and I realized I was shaking—whether from exertion or fear, I couldn’t tell. I leaned against a sturdy oak tree, its rough bark grounding me in reality.
“What am I doing?” I whispered to myself.
“Running away from me,” a dark, familiar voice sounded out to my left. I jumped about a foot off the ground. I turned toward the sound to see a heaving Massimo standing there.
He had always looked big, but somehow, like this, there was something almost grotesque, almost predatory about his form.
I gulped and took a small step back. He watched the movement with the same finesse a wolf would have at its meal.
Hell.
“I-I want to be alone.”
“Tough,” he responded, taking a step toward me and closing whatever gap I had been able to put between us. “I don’t want you to be alone.”
The first splattering of rain hit my forehead. I flinched from it and looked up at the sky. We were going to find ourselves drenched soon if we didn’t leave.
“Let’s just go back inside,” I said, not wanting to be out here any longer.
He shook his head.
I frowned. “No? Why not?”
He didn’t answer me.
I backed away another step. His eyes flared. I didn’t think I had ever seen Massimo look like this.
My toes wiggled on the grass. I should have stopped to put on some shoes, at least.
“Massimo.”
He didn’t seem to be hearing me.
“You don’t want me to treat you like you’re broken?” He took another step toward me. “Perhaps you’re right. And perhaps I had been wrong in the way I’ve been acting. But principessa , I’m going to rectify the situation very, very soon.”
I didn’t think.
I ran.
I didn’t even know why I was running, but I was running as fast as I could; all the while, his dark chuckles followed me along just as a clap of thunder sounded out, and another bolt of lightning shot up the sky, giving my just enough light to see what was in front of me for three seconds or so.
The air was thick with the scent of rain as I stumbled through the dark. An array of flowers in vibrant hues of purple, pink, red, and yellow from my own memory swayed in the breeze, their delicate petals brushing against my legs as I ran. The sky above took on a tint of deep grays and smoky blues, promising an imminent downpour.
I could hear Massimo’s footsteps behind me, gaining ground with each passing second. My heart raced, pumping adrenaline through my veins as I pushed myself to run faster.
Just as I reached the house, the skies opened up. Fat raindrops pelted down, quickly soaking through my thin clothing. I gasped as the cold water hit my skin, that surprise slowing me down.
And that was all it took for Massimo to catch up to me.
I felt his hand grasp my wrist. I spun around, coming face to face with those mesmerizing green eyes once again. We stood there for a moment, chests heaving.
“Massimo,” I breathed out.
He slammed his lips against mine.
It took me a moment for the taste of him, the feel, to truly hit me, but once it did…
I couldn’t help it.
I kissed him back.
I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed back as hard, as fervently as he was kissing me. I kissed him as if I was afraid he might disappear on me, and what would I do then, had that been the case?
When had I made myself so dependent on Massimo I couldn’t think, couldn’t breathe, couldn’t live without him occupying every molecule of my being?
Rain splashed down on us, and still, we didn’t pull away.
His hands moved down my body, coming down to the hem of the shirt I was wearing.
I felt him lift it up and off me.
I let him.
He pulled back to take me in. I didn’t know how well he could see me from the darkened sky, but the sensation I got from his gaze was the same.
My nipples pebbled from the cool air and my own arousal as he bent down and took an aching tip in between his lips. He rolled it around over and over with his teeth as one hand came up and plucked at the other nipple. I closed my eyes and moaned out to the sky, rubbing my legs together and wanting more from him.
More and just more and more.
“Massimo,” I said as I felt him pull down the shorts I was wearing, letting them fall down my legs, along with my panties. He straightened and wrapped his arms around my waist, lifting me up until the shorts lay in a messy heap on the dirty ground as he pressed me up against a wall of the house. The rough surface scratched against my back, not that I was going to say anything as he placed me back down on my feet.
He bent down and kissed the skin where my neck met my shoulder, sucking it into his mouth before he took a nip at me.
I let out a small cry as he moved his way down my body, his lips taking a small pause here and there, from the top of one breast to the other, down to my nipple, my ribs, my hip… further down until he was kneeling on the ground in front of me. One hand grabbed my leg before pushing it up and hooking it on his broad shoulder, exposing me to him.
I heard more than felt him take a sniff of me.
“Delicious,” he growled before he buried his face between my legs.
I cried out when I felt his tongue on my pussy, my hands moving to the soft strands of his hair and grabbing two fistfuls, pulling on it.
“Massimo,” I pleaded when I felt his fingers plunging deep inside me. He fucked me with them as his lips closed around my clit, pinching it and jolting me. “God.”
“That’s right, baby. Does this feel good?” he asked. “Does it feel good when I play with your sweet little cunt? My cunt?”
I nodded in agreement, tears pinching the corners of my eyes. It was his. Everything of mine belonged to him. He was the rightful owner, and how I fucking loved that.
How I fucking loved him.
His mouth and fingers worked ruthlessly over my pussy.
“Tell me, principessa . Does it feel good?”
He fucked me harder with his fingers as he asked the question.
“Yes,” I screamed out. “Yes!”
“Fuck, you have the prettiest little cunt. And so fucking tight. This is just for me, yeah?”
I nodded in agreement, even if he couldn’t see me.
He pulled out and slapped at my pussy several times, causing me to convulse over the pain and pleasure.
“Tell me,” he said darkly.
“This is yours. Only yours,” I said.
As if I could ever belong to anyone else. As if Massimo De Luca hadn’t ruined me so thoroughly, so completely, I no longer knew who I was before him.
My hips bucked against his hand, craving more of his touch. He chuckled darkly, pleased by my desperation.
“Such a needy little thing,” he purred, his breath hot against my inner thigh. “I love seeing you like this, completely at my mercy.”
“Please,” I begged, not even sure what I was asking for. More? Less? I was lost in a haze of sensation.
He growled, the vibration sending shivers up my spine. “You beg so prettily for me, principessa . But I’m not done with you yet.”
His fingers plunged back inside me, curling to hit that perfect spot. I cried out, my back arching off the wall.
“Not until you come against my mouth,” he said, pulling his fingers out and replacing them with his tongue. I closed my eyes as my legs shook, and I wasn’t sure if I would be able to hold myself up.
I pressed my palm against the wall, trying to hold my balance.
My body trembled, every nerve ending alight with sensation. His touch was electric, sending shockwaves through me with each caress and stroke. I arched my back, desperate for more contact, more of him. I barely felt it when the rain picked up. I wasn’t cold.
No, I was hot all over, and I needed more of him.
My climax came out of nowhere. I opened my mouth in a soundless scream as every part of me seemed to cave in on itself, and I just didn’t know what to do. I felt adrift. Like I was floating across the hazardous ocean water as the storm raged on, and there was no anchor to keep me steady.
Tears streamed down my face, mixing in with the rainwater.
I barely got myself under control, and still, it wasn’t enough.
“Please,” I whimpered, my voice barely above a whisper. I should be ashamed of how much, how badly I needed him. I was past that.
He chuckled darkly, his breath hot against my inner thigh. “Please what, principessa ? Use your words.”
I swallowed hard, struggling to form coherent thoughts through the haze of desire. “Please… more. I need you inside me.”
My thighs clenched from the words. Could I handle more? I didn’t know. But I knew if I didn’t get this from him, I might as well die.
His fingers traced teasingly along my slit, gathering my wetness. “So needy,” he murmured. “So desperate for my cock. Is that what you want?”
He fumbled and unbuttoned his pants, pulling out his hard length. My mouth watered at the sight.
“Yes,” I gasped. “God, yes. Please fuck me.”
In one swift motion, he rose and positioned himself against me. He picked me up until my legs wrapped around his trim waist. Without warning, he pushed inside.
He didn’t give me time to adjust to his size.
He fucked me.
Hard and deep, he drove into me again and again. My back slammed against the wall with each powerful thrust. I cried out, overwhelmed by the intense pleasure and delicious pain. His hands gripped my hips bruisingly tight as he pounded relentlessly into my aching core.
“Is this what you needed?” he growled in my ear, his hot breath making me shiver.
“Yes!” I cried out. “Don’t stop, please don’t stop!”
He gripped my hips tighter, angling deeper. The new position hit just the right spot. My inner walls clenched around him as the tension coiled tighter and tighter. I clawed at his back, desperate for more. His lips crashed against mine in a searing kiss as he continued his punishing pace. I was completely at his mercy, pinned between his muscular body and the unyielding wall. Every nerve ending was on fire. I felt my climax building rapidly, threatening to consume me entirely.
“That’s it,” he said. “Come for me. Let me feel you come on my cock.”
With a few more brutal thrusts, I came undone. Wave after wave of ecstasy crashed over me as I shattered in his arms. He followed shortly after with a guttural moan, spilling himself deep inside me.
All the while, three little words beat around in my mind in tandem with my racing heartbeat. True and simple.
I love you.