27. Julia
27
JULIA
“ W hy do they call you Bear?” I asked, my throat still scratchy and hoarse from the tube being removed a few days ago. I had never gotten an opportunity to ask, and after almost dying, I wouldn’t waste any more time.
Roman smirked and shook his head, holding out a spoonful of cheap pudding. “Because nothing can get through me if I stand my ground. Ever since I was little, I was a juggernaut, too big for my britches.” He put the spoon between my lips and I swallowed it down. Even though I wasn’t a huge fan of the taste, I needed the calories. “And I protect what’s mine.”
“Hmm,” I said. “Me too.”
“Good thing you’re married to me, then,” he said, scooping up the last bit and offering it out to me. But I shook my head, unable to stomach anymore. He ate it himself and set the plastic cup on the side table. “But don’t you ever do anything like that again, little wife.”
I scoffed and rolled my eyes. “Your life is good enough to trade for mine, but mine is not good enough to trade for yours?”
“You’re goddamned right.” He glanced down at my stomach with a knowing look, and I clutched my midsection. After the trauma of being shot and going through surgery, I had miscarried. I’d been crying about it since I woke up and found out. I yearned for the life I’d lost, even though I didn’t know I was pregnant in the first place. It wasn’t far along, barely six weeks, but it was enough. Up until very recently, I wasn’t sure I wanted this with him, and now I mourned the future that had been ripped away from us.
Perhaps that was the sacrifice fate demanded to keep us both alive. Perhaps it wasn’t me that had to die, but the baby I carried inside me. I hated Gabriella all over again. But at least it was over now. As much as it hurt, we’d have peace. We could have a new future. We could start again.
“I won’t apologize for saving your life,” I said.
“Don’t worry, mia cara, ” he said, his eyes clouding with that telltale sign he had something wicked and debauched brewing in that brilliant mind. “I’ll find some way for you to make it up to me.” He stood and leaned over me, bringing his lips to mine for a chaste kiss that quickly bordered something much too fiery, considering I’d been in a hospital bed for over a week. But we were both too emotional for anything else, so with one last kiss on my forehead, he sat back down and smiled.
I had a long road to recovery ahead. The bullet had deflated a lung, and pieces would be lodged in my rib cage for the rest of my life. I’d need physical therapy and rehabilitation, but I was already up and walking around for twenty minutes twice a day, which the doctors said was good progress.
Gabriella was dead. Most of her lackeys were dead. The other MCs had gone home empty-handed and missing some of their men. Della had gone missing—either run away with one of the MCs or disappeared on her own. Leo said she hadn’t shown back up on Caputi territory and I hadn’t heard from her. Not that I’d tried to reach out.
I didn’t blame her for what she’d done. She must have felt pressured to give Gabriella information about me once our aunt threatened Della’s long-time, on-again-off-again boyfriend, Matteo. But I couldn’t see how I’d ever trust her. Perhaps it was best she’d run away. Perhaps she’d taken Matteo with her and they’d ridden off into the sunset together. I’d like to think so rather than brood over what more she might do to ruin my life.
Things had gone the way we wanted, and now we tried to move on with a new goal: peace between our families.
“I love you,” I said, blinking back tears. “I’m sorry I ever said I didn’t. I’m sorry I even left before the wedding.” I knew now it had been hormones and stress and?—
“Shh,” he said, brushing hair out of my face. “Enough. You’re safe. I’m safe.”
“We lost good people.”
“We did. But everyone who was there was prepared for that. It’s not your fault. It’s no one’s fault,” he said, rising to sit on the hospital bed by my legs. “I love you so much. I never thought I’d feel this way about anyone, least of all you.”
I smiled as warmth raced through my blood, settling in a warm puddle in my gut. The minute I got out of this hospital, I’d find some way to make it up to him, to prove how much he truly meant to me and always would.
“There she is!” came a deep bellow from the doorway. Hollywood walked in with his arms open wide. Chesco, Ru, V, and Alba walked behind him, followed by KC, Saint, Castor, and Pollux.
“Oh, little coz.” Chesco rubbed his tattooed hand over my hair, mussing it up the way an older brother would. “You look like shit.”
“Hey!” both Roman and V said at the same time in the same tone.
“You look just fine, all things considered,” Saint said with a grin.
“Yeah, when I got blown up, I couldn’t eat solid foods for like a month.” Pollux picked up the plastic container on the side table and sniffed it. “You’re lucky you’re getting pudding already.”
“How are you feeling?” Alba asked, setting a vase of flowers on the counter behind Chesco.
“Better,” I said. “The doctors say I should be able to leave soon.”
“Good,” V cut in. “Bear needs someone to keep him from barking at everyone.”
“I’m not barking,” Roman said.
“Castor, find the fuckers that tried to kill my wife,” Castor mocked.
“Saint, make sure the Hell’s Knights know we’re coming,” Saint added with a smirk.
“Hollywood, don’t fucking touch my wrenches,” Hollywood mimicked. “Hollywood, find the Kings of Carnage. Hollywood, go meet with Rico and?—”
“I shouldn’t have to tell you these things.” Roman sighed, clearly exasperated. “You should just do them.”
“See what I mean?” Hollywood rolled his eyes. “A fucking grouch since you’ve been gone.”
I laughed as my company carried on around me, teasing each other and fussing over whatever they could do to help me. It felt good to be surrounded by them, to have their love and support in a way I didn’t before. The girls had tried to make me feel welcome, I’d known Saint for years, and I’d appreciated Hollywood’s antics before I married Roman. But perhaps I’d been keeping a part of myself from them, just in case it didn’t work out. They had sensed this barrier and kept themselves from me in return. To see them all here now, despite the history between our families, made me feel accepted in a way nothing ever had before.
I loved Roman, and I loved our family, and I loved these people with everything in me. For the first time since I married him, I was proud to call myself Julia Montgomery, the old lady to the Rose president, the woman meant to carry his children. I was a sister to them, a cousin, a friend, and I’d finally accepted that.
A few days later, once the wound had healed enough and I could stand on my own without toppling over, the hospital released me to go home. I hobbled into Roman’s house… our house…and relaxed in the living room while he fussed over me. He took off my shoes and rubbed my feet, making sure to massage my calves and thighs, and I ran my good hand through his hair, smiling when he glanced up at me with those piercing dark eyes.
“What do you need?” he murmured.
“You. Just you.” He climbed up my body to kiss me. We couldn’t have sex how we both wanted, not until I healed completely, but he still rubbed me the way only he could, enough to bring me pleasurable euphoria and calmness.
The next day, Leo came to visit. I’d seen him at the hospital, of course, but now that I was home, we could get down to business. Our uncles had asked me to help him run the family, and even though I didn’t think I was qualified for such a thing, Leo had been steadfast in his agreement.
“How are you feeling?” he asked, sitting across the dining room table from me, drumming his fingers on the wood. He’d started wearing the Caputi signet ring, and that made me even more proud of what we’d done. Our father had worn that my entire life, and I was happy it now belonged to a man worthy of it. Leo would never do to me what our parents had, and I had faith he could run the business much better than any of the Caputis before him.
“Okay,” I said and sipped at my coffee. “Sore, but that will pass.”
He nodded. “And your husband?”
“He’s getting ready to take us to the clubhouse. Church is today.”
“So much for fate, huh?” He raised his eyebrows and grinned in that cocky way that meant he knew he’d been right.
“It didn’t kill my husband, but it almost killed me.”
“Hmm. I recall you stepping in front of her gun.” Leo tsked and shook his head. “Some fate if you’re the one who makes the stupid decisions.”
I gave him a nasty look, mumbling Italian expletives under my breath. “I saved my husband, didn’t I? What would happen to our alliance if he died?”
My brother shrugged, nonchalant and seemingly too high and mighty to even consider it. “We’ll never know now.”
He smiled and drummed his fingers again, a nervous tick that clued me into something going on with him that he didn’t want to share.
“What is it?” I raised my eyebrows, bracing for the worst.
“I’ve appointed Chesco as my second,” he said.
“Good.” I liked that. He would keep him in line when I couldn’t.
“There are rumors,” he said. “Some of the underbosses are already talking about a coup.”
I tsked my teeth. “Benito was almost dethroned several times, even once by our father.”
“We must remain strong,” he said, reaching across the table to grab my hand. “We must remain united.”
“Of course.” I sensed something in his stare, an undercurrent of a plot developing, one he wouldn’t share unless I pushed. “Leo, what are you thinking?”
He shrugged. “It might be time for me to make my own alliance.”
“Oh?” I couldn’t imagine him as a married man, but then again, I didn’t know this version of him as well as the one before. Getting sober had changed him in a million ways, all for the better. “And who are you thinking?”
He smirked. “You should help me with that.”
“Okay.” I started to consider the best possible candidates. If one of the other families were talking dissent, perhaps it might be worthwhile to start there. “We need to shore up our trade agreements. The cartel has exclusively been tied to the Roses, but now that we’re family, perhaps they would reconsider.”
“There are the Canadians and the IRA.” Leo continued to talk business as my husband walked into the room and straightened his cut. He wore his jeans and a black T-shirt, but my oh my, how delicious he looked in such a casual outfit. It made me wish I was completely healed. It made me wish I could get rid of my brother and drop to my knees and beg my husband to do despicable things to my mouth. It made me want to start a fight for no other reason than to have him put me in my place.
Roman leaned down behind me and kissed the side of my neck, nuzzling me in a deep show of affection that turned my insides to mush and curled my toes.
“I should head out,” Leo said, standing. “It’s good to see you, mia sorella. Please don’t scare me like that again.”
“I’ll make sure she doesn’t,” Roman said with a devilish grin.
“I won’t,” I said. “Trust me. Getting shot once was enough for a lifetime.”