Chiara
CHIARA
W hen I wake up earlier than usual the next morning, I am angrier than I was when I went to bed last night. I’m seething in the shower, while I’m doing my hair and makeup and when I choose my outfit for the day.
I’m pissed off because no one had the decency to tell me about Legacy Week, so I can prepare myself for it. Everyone hid it away from me, and I remember Nikolai telling Connor to shut up about it on the flight over.
Why would they all keep this from me? I thought Nikolai and I were closer now and even the girls were treating me like they’ve known me for ages.
The Suite is still quiet when I head downstairs, anger still bubbling beneath the surface and my palm stinging from the cut last night. I can’t believe they made me take a stupid oath. I just wanted to get my degree and fuck off and now I’ve sworn myself to the goddamn Bratva.
Nikolai is sitting at the kitchen island when I walk inside for some coffee and breakfast. He looks up when he sees me and smiles .
“Good morning,” he says, but I don’t return the smile, nor do I greet him back.
Instead, I head straight to pour myself a cup of coffee, and I catch the frown on his face when I look away from him. I’m more hurt that he was the one who didn’t warn me, because I’m sure the girls would have thought he did.
“Someone’s in a bad mood this morning,” he quips, and I can’t help but scoff.
“Just trying to swallow this coffee down, but it’s hard to get past the betrayal I feel,” I say without looking at him.
There’s silence after this, and I still don’t bother to look at him as I pull the yogurt and muesli out for breakfast.
I can feel Nikolai’s eyes on me as I busy myself with breakfast, the tension in the room thick enough to cut through. The silence stretches, heavy and uncomfortable, until finally, he breaks it.
“Betrayal?” he repeats, his tone laced with confusion and a hint of defensiveness. “What are you talking about?”
I slam the spoon down on the counter, finally turning to face him. “You knew, Nikolai. You knew what was going to happen last night, and you didn’t say a damn word to me. You let them blindfold me, drag me out of bed, and force me into some twisted mafia ritual without any warning. How could you do that to me?”
He blinks, clearly taken aback by the force of my anger. “, I?—”
“Don’t,” I cut him off, my voice trembling with the effort to keep it steady. “Don’t try to justify this. You should’ve told me, warned me, something! You’re supposed to be my family, right? Isn’t that what you keep saying? That we’re family?”
Nikolai sighs, rubbing the back of his neck, clearly struggling to find the right words.
“You weren’t even supposed to fucking be there,” he murmurs, pushing his coffee aside. “But my word was overlooked. ”
My heart stutters, and I feel my face flush as the shock gives way to a searing wave of anger. “What?”
He sighs, running a hand through his hair, avoiding my gaze. “Giovanni gave the word to bring you, so even if I wanted to warn you, it was too late. You’re one of the three initiates he’s chosen to take part in Legacy Week.”
The words slam into me like a punch to the gut. Giovanni chose me? I thought I was just swept up in all this because of circumstances, but Giovanni specifically wanted me to be part of this madness. I don’t know what’s worse—the fact that I’m involved in Legacy Week, or the fact that Nikolai, of all people, kept this from me.
“So, what? You were just going to sit there and let it happen?” I snap, my voice rising as the hurt bubbles up. “No warning? No heads up?”
Nikolai finally meets my eyes, his expression dark, unreadable. “You think I wanted this for you, ? You think I didn’t try to stop it?”
I scoff, crossing my arms over my chest, trying to hold back the wave of betrayal that’s threatening to drown me. “Doesn’t seem like you tried hard enough.”
His jaw tightens, his eyes narrowing slightly. “You don’t get it, do you? This isn’t about what I want, this is Crown tradition and Giovanni was the one who called for you to be there. He chose you as one of his initiates for Legacy Week, and once that happens, no one can override it—not even me.”
“Bullshit!” I slam my hands on the table, my voice louder than I intended. “You’re my family, Nikolai, or at least you’re supposed to be. Family doesn’t throw each other to the wolves without warning. Family doesn’t let this kind of thing happen.”
He flinches, but it’s gone in a flash. He straightens up, his expression hardening, closing off. “This isn’t about family. Giovanni made his move, and once that happened, I had no choice. We all had no choice.”
I can feel my chest tightening, the betrayal cutting deep. I thought I could rely on Nikolai, that even in this twisted world of Crowns and power plays, he’d have my back. But I guess I was wrong
“You had no choice?” I spit, shaking my head. “You always have a choice, Nikolai. You could’ve at least warned me, given me something, instead of blindsiding me like this.”
He exhales sharply, frustration flickering across his face. “And what would that have done? Made you more anxious, more paranoid? This isn’t some game, . The moment you set foot at Willow Bridge, you were already in it, whether you wanted to be or not.”
I feel a bitter laugh bubbling up in my throat, but it comes out more like a choked sob. “Is that supposed to make me feel better? Knowing that my entire life is just another move in your fucked-up chessboard?”
He leans forward, his voice low, but there’s an edge to it, something dangerous. “You were never supposed to be a part of this. I fought to keep you out, but Giovanni…” He trails off, his eyes flickering with something I can’t quite place—guilt, maybe? “He saw something in you.”
I swallow hard, my mind racing. “And what the hell does that mean? Why me?”
Nikolai leans back, running his hand over his face. “I don’t know. I don’t fucking know. But he chose you, and now you’re in it. There’s nothing I can do to change that.”
I feel the tears prick at the corners of my eyes, but I blink them away, refusing to let them fall. I won’t give him the satisfaction of seeing how hurt I am.
“I started trusting you,” I say quietly, my voice trembling with emotion. He opens his mouth to argue, but I don’t give him the chance. I slam my half-finished breakfast back on the counter, the yogurt splattering onto the granite.
“This isn’t how you treat family,” I say, my voice cold and final. “You don’t blindside them and expect them to just fall in line. I don’t care about your traditions or your tests; I wasn’t born into your world or made for it. If this is what it means to be part of it, then I’m better off leaving.”
I turn on my heel and storm out of the kitchen, my heart pounding in my chest. I don’t look back to see the expression on Nikolai’s face, don’t care if he calls after me, I just need to get out of there, to put as much distance between us as possible.
Grabbing my bag where I left it earlier, the anger and hurt bubbling over as I rush toward the SUV. I can’t believe this is happening. I can’t believe that the one person I thought I could trust in all of this, has let me down so completely.
When I get into the back, I bury my face in my hands; the tears threatening to spill over. But I won’t cry. I won’t give them the satisfaction. They want to break me, but I won’t let them. I’ll survive this, just like I survived last night.
But as I sit there, trying to calm the storm of emotions raging inside me, I can’t shake the feeling of betrayal. Nikolai was supposed to be different. He was supposed to be my friend, my brother. But now I see that he’s just as ruthless, just as heartless, as the rest of them.
And that realization hurts more than anything else.