Chapter Twenty
Mindy
I open my laptop and stare blankly at the screen.
I’ve been working from home for the last few days. I can’t bring myself to return to the office after that disastrous presentation and Albert’s sleazy proposition. There have been no calls or emails from Christine or Albert since, but I’m sure they already started looking for my replacement. The only reason I still have a job is that they haven’t found the right person yet.
My days have been the same this week: waking up, getting Sharon ready for school, driving her there, and returning home to bury myself in work. But today is Saturday, and I have fallen behind on my tasks. A looming deadline hangs over me, urging me to work over the weekend.
Sharon pokes her head into my makeshift home office, clutching her favorite stuffed animal. "Mommy, do you want to play?"
I glance at my never-ending Excel spreadsheet, then back at my daughter’s cute little face. Guilt washes over me. "I'm sorry sweetie. Mommy’s got to finish some work first."
Her shoulders droop as she mutters, "You're always working, Mommy. And I'm bored."
Ouch. She’s right on the money and it stings. So, I come up with an idea. "Okay, how about this: I'll work a little more and then we can go to the zoo this afternoon. What do you think, sweetie?"
Her eyes light up. "Really? The zoo?"
"Sure thing, baby," I nod, feeling determined to make it happen. "You’ll get to see all your favorite animals."
She grins mischievously. "Even the stinky ones?"
I laugh. "Especially the stinky ones!"
As Sharon runs off, chattering about penguins and lions, I turn my attention back to my computer. The Excel sheet hasn’t gone anywhere and is still looming in front of me.
I’m about halfway into the report when my phone starts buzzing. My heart rate picks up a little – maybe it’s Christine, calling to tell me that I’ve been fired. Can I get fired on a Saturday?
But as I glance at the screen, I realize it’s not Christine. It’s my sister, Alexis.
"What the…" I mutter, not really knowing what to do or how to feel all of a sudden. It’s been years since we spoke. We haven’t exactly been on good terms after she betrayed me by using confidential information against Maron during his launch party.
She did come to see us after Sharon was born, but even that was strange. Our relationship was strained, to say the least. She was high on pain meds, and acted irrational. And then, one afternoon when she was supposed to come over, she didn’t. I tried to reach out to her, but her phone was off. I got scared. So, I called StarDust, her workplace at the time, to see if they knew anything. All I was told was that she was not at the office. That she was forced to go to rehab and she doesn’t want me to contact her. That was the last time I heard of my sister.
It was hard at first. Sure, our relationship was already in tatters, but she was still my sister. The only family I had left besides my daughter. It was tough to not have her in my life anymore, especially after losing Emily. But between my job and trying to be a good mother for Sharon, I didn’t have the mental capacity to try and pursue contact with her. After everything she’s done, it seemed like a hopeless case anyway.
My phone keeps ringing and I find myself hesitating. Why would Alexis try to reach out after all this time? Could she be in some kind of trouble? Before I can think better of it, I pick up the phone from the desk and answer the call.
"Alexis?" I wedge the phone between my neck and shoulder and decide to head to the kitchen to prepare a salad for Sharon in the meantime.
"Hey… Mindy." Her voice is softer than I remember and it’s tinged with nervousness. "I know it’s been forever, and frankly… I wouldn’t blame you if you hung up on me."
I pause, knife hovering over a carrot. "It’s good to hear your voice, Lex. How are you doing?"
She clears her throat. "Well… I’m calling from rehab. I’ve been here for a few months now."
My eyebrows shoot up as I resume chopping vegetables. A few months? That’s definitely an improvement, compared to the Alexis I remember. "And… how is it going?"
"I’m getting there," she says, her voice cracking slightly. "Listen, Mindy, I won’t beat around the bush. I’m calling to say sorry."
The knife stops in my hand again. Surprise of the day. Scratch that. The year. Maybe rehab is doing something positive for her. "I… thanks, Alexis," I tell her carefully.
"I’m following this twelve-step program," she explains after a pause. "I’ve reached the part where I need to make amends with all the people I’ve wronged. And… well, you’re the first person I wanted to reach out to, Mindy."
I feel my throat clog up with a mix of old hurt and newfound sympathy. "Look Lex, I appreciate this, but what you did and the things you said… they’re not that easy to get over."
"I understand," she interjects. "I know I blamed you for everything. For the accident, for Emily, Mom, and my addiction. I can never forgive myself for the things I said to you. It was a wicked and unfair thing to do. I can see that now." There’s a pause, and I can hear her taking a deep breath. "The pills… they had a way of twisting my emotions, making me say and do things that were… I was not myself, Mindy." She pauses again. "But I know that’s no excuse for the things I’ve done. Including what I did to you and Maron."
There’s a long silence on the other end of the line and a part of me begins to wonder if she hung up on me. "Alexis?" I ask. "Are you still there?"
"Yeah." When she speaks again, her voice comes out hoarse. "Look, I don’t expect you to forgive me. I just want to say sorry. For everything. I was in a very dark place, and I took it all out on you."
I lean against the counter, barely believing that we’re having this conversation. I never would have expected this to happen. "Thank you, Alexis. I tell her quietly. "I… I think I need some time to process this, but thank you."
"Of course," she continues and inhales deeply. "You know… I’ve been seeing this therapist…"
A therapist?
Alexis seeing a therapist?
"Wait… a therapist?" I blurt, unable to mask my shock. " For real? Like, you’re actually going to therapy?"
"Sure," she replies. "I see her every week. Her name is Dr. Rachel Anderson. She’s well-known in the industry. Specializes in addictions. You can Google her."
"I must say, Lex, that’s… unexpected," I tell her. "I never thought you’d be in therapy. I’m happy for you."
"Thanks," Alexis says, sounding relieved. "Rachel’s been really helpful. Besides my rehab program, she also encouraged me to call you… so I did."
A fleeting thought crosses my mind. Would she have called me if it wasn’t for this Rachel-person? I don’t ask her that question, though. For now, I just want to feel grateful for the civilized conversation I get to have with my sister for the first time since the accident that took Emily from us. Which was almost ten years ago.
"I’m glad you’re getting help, Lex," I tell her, not really knowing what else to say to her. As much as I’m happy for her progress, the wounds she caused run so deep that it takes a lot more than a phone call to heal them.
There’s another pause at her end of the line. When she speaks again, her voice sounds tentative. "You know, I was hoping… that maybe one day I could be a real auntie to Sharon. I know I haven’t been there for her, and I want to make things right."
I hesitate. Letting her close to Sharon after all the things she’s said and done is a hard pill to swallow. But then again, I want to give my sister the benefit of doubt. And I want Sharon to have an auntie. I just can’t trust the auntie yet. "Maybe with time, Lex. I hope we can make it happen."
"Thanks, sis. That’s all I need for now. A chance to make things right with the family I lost." I can hear genuine gratitude in her voice but there’s also hesitation. I know there’s something else she wants to tell me, so I wait. "Actually," she begins, her voice coming out cautious. "I will be allowed to leave the rehab facility for a few hours every day from next week. Would it be okay if… if I came to visit sometime?"
I take a deep breath, still not sure how to feel about this. This is a big step for both of us. A very big one. But then again, maybe a coffee won’t hurt. It’s obvious that she’s trying and that’s making me hopeful. "Alright, Lex. Let me know when you’re free."
"I will," she says, sounding like a giant weight just came off her shoulders. "Thank you, Mindy. Really. You don’t know how much this means to me."
"Sure." I pause. "I'm proud of you for getting help. It must have been hard for you."
"Hard but worth it," she whispers, her voice cracking. "I love you, sis."
Those words stir something within me. An indescribable feeling courses through my body and I really don’t know how to respond.
"Talk soon," is all I choke out.