Chapter 15
Shotgun
After losing Lindsey, I’d come to accept the fact that whenever I cared about someone—when I loved someone with my heart and soul, I lost them.
It wasn’t like it was difficult to come to this revelation.
I’d lost my folks, and I loved them both; then I lost Ada soon after.
When I joined the military, I was looking for an escape from my world as it was.
I thought it would help put some distance between me and those feelings of loss and guilt I was consumed with, but it only made it that much worse.
During my training, I’d forged strong ties with the men in my platoon.
Some of those guys had come to feel like family to me, and watching them die nearly did me in.
I hated myself for surviving. Hell, the guilt of it all had me praying that I’d die right along with them, but alas, fate had other plans for me.
I survived, but I wasn’t the same man I had been—far from it.
I’d grown hard, bitter, and cold. I didn’t want to love or be loved.
I didn’t feel like I deserved either, and a big part of me still felt that way.
But there was a small part, a part I no longer controlled, that was wondering if I was still capable of such feelings.
I glanced down at Remington curled up in the crook of my arm, looking so beautiful and peaceful, and I knew I had my answer.
I had feelings for her, feelings I didn’t ask for nor want, but they were there, nonetheless.
That realization sent a wave of panic washing over me.
I’d made a promise to myself and to Lindsey that I’d never let myself fall for anyone, and I’d always done everything in my power to keep that promise—until now.
My chest tightened at the thought, and I was suddenly overcome with the need to get the hell out of there.
I knew it wasn’t right. I knew Remington deserved better, but I felt like the walls were closing in on me, and I had to clear my head.
Being careful not to wake Remington, I eased out of bed and quickly got dressed.
I sent Country a text, then quietly slipped out of the room.
I thought I was in the clear until I reached the kitchen and found Ada there waiting for me.
She was standing at the kitchen sink with her arms crossed as she said, “Where ya running off to so early?”
“Gotta get over to the clubhouse.”
“Um-hmm.” I could tell by her expression that Ada didn’t believe me. “Shore ya do.”
“Wouldn’t say so if I didn’t.” She never took her eyes off me as I grabbed my keys from the counter, leaving no doubt that she had something to say, but there was no way in hell I was going to give her time to say it.
I reached for the doorknob, and on my way out, I told her, “Country will be here in a few minutes to keep an eye on things until I can get back.”
After I closed the door, I wasted no time getting on my bike and cranking the engine.
In a matter of seconds, I was out the gate and on my way.
I’d only made it a few blocks when I spotted Country heading over to Ada’s.
Relieved that they both would be looked after, I continued towards the clubhouse.
When I pulled up, it was just after seven in the morning.
Knowing most of the guys wouldn’t have made it in yet, I headed into the kitchen to see who was around, and as luck would have it, Hawk and Menace were sitting at the table talking to Axel and Widow.
They were all eating breakfast and hadn’t realized that I’d even walked into the room until I sat down next to Hawk and said, “Morning.”
“Hey, brother,” Hawk replied with surprise. “I wasn’t expecting to see you here. Thought you were staying over at Ada’s with Remington.”
“I am. Just wanted to come by and see what was going on.” I got up and poured myself a cup a coffee. “Figured you were busy working on a plan for Sunday night.”
“We’ve already got it sorted,” Hawk announced. “I was going to call you this morning to go over it all.”
“Well, I just saved you some trouble.” I took a drink of my coffee. “Don’t gotta call when I’m standing right here.”
“True, but now, I can’t just hang up on you when you start mouthing off,” Hawk teased, but when he saw my expression, he quickly changed his tune. “Oh, come on, brother. You know I’m just messin’ with ya.”
“Just tell me you guys have something figured out.”
“You know we do,” Menace answered for him. “I’ve gotten the blueprints of the Tyson factory. We’ll have every entrance and exit covered, and when they start their meet, we’ll take out their guards and move in.”
“And when it’s done?”
“Viper’s already got Billy on standby. Billy knows it’s a big job, and he’ll be ready.”
Billy the Butcher was the club’s cleaner.
He had the ability to wipe a scene like no other.
When he was done, there wouldn’t be a single trace of evidence that could be linked back to the club.
With twenty or more potential victims, we’d need him now more than ever.
I gave Hawk a nod as I said, “Good. We’ll definitely need him ready. ”
“Rafe and Widow will be heading over to the locker tonight to pick up our weapons and ammo. They’ll go through them all and make sure we have everything we need for the take down.”
“Sounds like you have it all sorted.”
I won’t pretend that it didn’t suck that my brothers had forged an attack without my input, because it did.
It sucked on all levels, but there wasn’t a damn thing I could do about it.
I’d fulfill my part during the attack and prayed that it would be a start in putting an end to all this bullshit.
Hawk got up and walked over to me as he said, “Couldn’t have done it without ya, brother.
You getting the information from McKinney saved our asses. ”
“He’s right,” Menace interjected. “You did good, brother.”
“Just doing what I can.” I ran my hand through my hair. “Just wish I could help find out more about Mathews.”
“I’ve been looking into him, but so far, there’s not much I can find on the guy.
” Menace leaned back with his hands behind his head, revealing the sleeve tattoos that covered both his arms. “The guy’s not married, but he has a girlfriend.
He has a nice place. A two-story house with a basement and a big shed, but he’s usually at his girlfriend’s place. ”
“What about Thomas Long? You find anything about him.”
“Not much. Just the fact that he’s missing,” Menace scoffed.
“But there has to be a reason why Mathews wanted him gone,” I pushed. “Maybe he found something on Mathews and was going to use it to take him down?”
“Maybe.”
“You think you can hack into his records and find out?”
“Yeah, but it’ll take some time.” Menace sat up in his seat. “IA’s are pretty tight on their security.”
“I’m sure they are, but I really think it would be worth our time for you to check it out.”
“Check what out?” Viper asked as he stepped into the room, and we all immediately fell silent.
It wasn’t unusual for us to have such a reaction to him.
Our president had a presence about him, one that demanded attention, and it seemed to come naturally.
He didn’t threaten or use his large stature to intimidate, but through his actions and calm demeanor, he commanded respect.
As he continued into the room, I answered, “Thomas Long. Thought he might have something in his files about Detective Mathews.”
“Good thinking.” Viper came up behind me and started pouring himself some coffee. “Just got a call from Ada.”
“About?”
“Seems she’s wanting to go stay with her granddaughter for a couple of days.”
Surprised, I asked, “Since when?”
“Since about fifteen minutes ago. She’s planning to leave in the next hour or so. Asked if I’d send a prospect to take her over.”
“You gotta be fucking kidding me.”
“Guessing you didn’t know anything about it.” Viper smirked as he said, “You and Remington run her out of her own house?”
“Fuck no,” I grumbled. “No clue what’s going on in that woman’s head.”
“Best be finding out before she leaves.”
I nodded, then started for the door. Before I walked out of the kitchen, I glanced over at Menace and said, “Let me know if you find out anything from Long’s files.”
“You know I will.”
I went out to the parking lot, and as I got on my bike, I looked back at the clubhouse with a sense of nostalgia.
I missed being there. I missed being with my brothers, my family, but I found comfort in the fact it wouldn’t be long before I could return.
I started the engine and pulled through the gate, speeding over to Ada’s in hopes of catching her before she left.
I was eager to know why she’d decided to up and leave without talking to me about it, but then again, it wasn’t like I’d given her a chance.
Concerned she was going to give me a fucking lecture about the night I’d spent with Remington, I bolted, giving her no time to talk to me about anything.
When I pulled up at her place, I found her sitting on the front porch with a duffle bag resting in the chair next to her.
I parked, and as I started up the stairs, I asked, “You going somewhere?”
“I am.” She was wearing her favorite straw hat and bright yellow dress with little white flowers, and I could tell by her expression that she’d already made up her mind about leaving. “Gonna go see Kara.”
“Since when?”
“Since she called me and asked me to.” Ada cocked her eyebrow in that way she did whenever she wasn’t happy with me. “Som’ting wrong wit’ dat?”
Kara was Ada’s granddaughter, and from the day she was born, it seemed like she was always into some kind of trouble—and it only got worse as she got older.
To make matters worse, she was one of those chicks who thought the world owed her something, especially her grandmother.
She was always taking advantage of her kindness, and I feared this time would be no different.
“No, just surprised you’re gonna go back after what happened last time you were there. ”