Quinn #3
"How bad was today?" Caden asks as he and Daithí take a seat opposite me in the library. Daithí holds a tray in his hands that has three plates stacked on it, while Caden has three glasses in his hands.
"An average Monday," I tell him, glancing back down at my book. I really don’t want to talk about today. It has to be one of the worst days that I have had in a very long time. Usually, I can ignore the words that Mam and Daire spew, but today I haven’t been able to.
Every single snide comment has hit me hard.
“It was fucking brutal,” Daithí tells him. “If she weren’t our ma, I’d have killed her.”
“What’s the excuse for not taking Daire out?” I murmur as I read the same line for the fourth time. I sigh, I’m not in the mood to read right now, not with these two in here wanting to talk.
Daithí’s lips twitch. “Our sister is pregnant.”
“And after the baby’s born?” I ask with a raised brow.
He smiles as he shakes his head. He thinks I’m joking, and while I may half be, there’s a part of me that would love to not have her in my life anymore. “You’ve six weeks before you can be free of her,” he tells me. “Six weeks, that’s it.”
In six weeks, I’ll be in a different house, a different world, with Lorenzo Mariano's ring on my left hand, bearing his name and everything that comes with it.
In six weeks, I leave the comfort and safety of this library along with Caden and Daithí, and I go somewhere I don't know yet, with people I barely know and a husband who's made it clear this marriage is anything but real.
Sure, we’ll be married in name only, but that’s about it. I have no other choice but to do it. I’m praying that it’ll be a lot better than what home is like.
"How are you actually feeling about it?" Caden asks.
"The marriage?" I question with a raised brow. Is that what he’s asking?
He nods, his gaze soft as he watches me carefully. "Yeah."
"I don't know enough about what it's going to be like to have a strong feeling about it yet," I say. "He's made the terms clear. I know what it is."
"What did he tell you?" Daithí asks, reaching for a plate and handing it to me.
"That once we marry, I’ll have his name and the protection that it brings, but nothing beyond the arrangement. He wanted to be open and honest, so I wouldn’t get my wires crossed about what the marriage is going to be like." I take a deep breath. "I respect that, actually."
Daithí and Caden exchange a look, one that has me tensing. God, what now?
"What?" I say.
"Nothing," Caden says, which means something. "It's just saying it is one thing. What it looks like practically is another."
I look at him. "What do you know about him? Actually know, not what you’ve heard about him."
Daithí leans forward, elbows on his knees and begins to eat his dinner. "What I know is that Lorenzo Mariano is meticulous, and he doesn't do things halfway. If he tells you the terms of something, those are the terms. He doesn't change the rules midway through."
I nod, relief running through me. "That's good."
"It is," Daithí says. "It also means if he decides something's a rule, it's a rule. He's not particularly flexible."
I think about the meeting in his office and the coolness of the way he laid everything out without softening anything. There was nothing in his demeanor or tone that said he was flexible.
"How is he with people he trusts?" I ask. "And I don’t mean business people, like you and da, but with his closest men.”
Caden tilts his head. "From what I've seen, he doesn't let many people in that far.
Ciro, obviously. Maybe one or two outside the family.
He's not…” he hesitates, and I can see him warring with himself if he should continue or not.
His voice drops a little as he does, indeed, continue.
“He's not warm or welcoming, Quinn, you know that.
He can be a monster when the occasion arises. "
"I know that." I don’t plan on giving him the chance to become that with me.
"But," Caden says, "he's not cruel either. I've watched him at enough Syndicate events to have a read on him. He's not the kind of man who tears people down for sport. He just keeps everything at a distance."
"So I live at a distance," I say. “It’s not like it’ll be hard.”
That’s what I’ve been doing here for my entire life. Keeping it up somewhere new will be easier.
"Maybe not forever," Daithí says.
I look at him. What’s that supposed to mean?
"He's not an unreasonable man," Daithí continues, "From what I can tell, he respects people who don't bend to him unnecessarily. People who hold their ground." He looks at me. "You're good at that."
Aren’t I just?
"I've had practice."
Caden’s eyes are soft as he smiles. "You have. You are smart, and you are brilliant, Quinn. You just need to know how to play this marriage to ensure it works for you."
“He's going to have enemies who try to get at him through you," Daithí says. "Anyone married to a man like that becomes a potential leverage point. You need to be aware of it."
"I am,” I say, a little pissy. I know what the hell I’m getting into.
"The women in that world, especially. Sabrina Laskaris—"
"I know about Sabrina." The words come out sharper than I intend.
I've heard the stories, everyone has. Most of them paint her as some desperate woman hunting for a mafia husband. Whether any of it's true, I don't know. I've never met her, but I've heard her name enough times to know exactly who she is.
"Then you know to be careful around her. She's smart, and she's got reach, and she's going to test you more than once."
I nod. Lorenzo already told me this. Knowing Daithí’s confirming it from the outside is useful, because it means it's not just Lorenzo's read on the situation, it's the general consensus.
"What about Vittoria?" I ask.
Daithí’s expression shifts slightly. "What about her?"
"She was kind to me at dinner. I want to know if I can trust it."
He is silent for a moment as though he’s thinking about it. "From what I know, Vittoria Mariano is one of the few genuinely decent people in that world. She's had a hard road and she hasn't let it make her hard. If she's offering you something genuine, I'd take it."
"I thought so," I say. "I just wanted the outside view."
Caden looks at me. "You're going to be okay, you know."
"I know," I say.
"I’m not just saying it for the sake of saying it." he says. " You're better at this than you give yourself credit for."
"I don't know yet what better at this looks like," I say. "I know what the terms are. I know what's expected publicly, I know what he does and doesn't want from me. I just don't know what the version of me is that exists in that house outside of all that."
"You'll figure it out," Daithí says. "You always do."
"And without asking anyone for help,” Caden replies, sounding a little miffed.
"A skill," I say dryly.
"Definitely a skill." He raises his cup to salute me.
“Now, there’s one thing you need to remember, Quinn,” Daithí says, sounding even more serious than ever.
“What?” I whisper, worry working its way through my body.
“You are smart, intelligent, and beautiful, but above all that, you are a Delaney. If you ever need us, we’ll be there.”
Caden nods in agreement. “No matter what it is, if you need us, we’ll be there.”
I can no longer hold back the tears, I let them fall and smile at the best brothers in the world. “I’m going to miss you both.”
Daithí smiles at me as he moves to sit beside me. “You may be marrying a Mariano, Quinn, you may be moving home, but you’re not losing us. We’re family. We’re all that we’ve got. Remember that.”
I don’t say anything, because what is there to say?
I start to eat along with Caden. Daithí returns to his seat and digs into his dinner.
But while we sit in silence, I can’t help but wonder what Daithí means.
We’re all that we’ve got? He’s da’s prodigy.
He’s the one that’ll take over when it’s time. Surely, Da would be who he’s got?
There’s so much that I don’t know. Daithí is so closed up and rarely speaks. Hell, it’s rare for him to be home, but since I got engaged to Lorenzo, he’s been here a lot more. I don’t know what’s going on, and I doubt he’ll tell me. I just hope that whatever it is, he’s safe and is cautious.
We start talking about other things, and I find myself relaxing more as the topic of Lorenzo, Mam, and Daire is no longer the topic of conversation.
I wish that we’d all done this a lot more often, but I also understand that it’s not feasible, especially when Daithí needs to be at da’s beck and call.
As if he can read my thoughts, Daithí’s cell rings and it’s da. “I’ve got to go,” he tells me and rises to his feet. He moves toward me, squeezes my shoulder and presses a kiss to my forehead. “I’ll talk to you later.”
“Be safe,” I call out to him and he gives me the softest smile I’ve ever received from him.
“What about me?” Caden asks with a laugh. “Do you not care about me?”
I shake my head and laugh. “Always. You be safe too.”
“Goodnight, Quinn,” Caden says as he exits the library and closes the door behind him, leaving me alone again.
I start to clean the table and the ring catches the light when I move my hand. I look at it, and dread fills my stomach. Six weeks. That’s all I’ve got left before I become someone’s wife.
I've been the background of this family my whole life. The one who blends in, who doesn't light up rooms, who's managed and overlooked, absorbed and set aside.
I have six weeks to change that. I don’t want to be that same person when I marry Lorenzo.
It’s time for me to figure out who Quinn Delaney really is.