Chapter 15
Ryder
We’re exhausted by the time we finish dinner and head upstairs. It was a long day, dealing with a hundred things. It was also incredibly domestic, and I know Claire was uncomfortable playing Woman of the Manor all day. Gretchen has worked here since before Claire was born, and now, Claire finds herself in a position she never expected to be in.
Another issue we discussed was my parents. I’m grateful Tiago called them on our behalf. My father apparently wasn’t pleased to hear we’d come to Wilde, but he calmed down when he learned Amos had died. He still didn’t elaborate much on whatever happened in the past except to say his father had been intolerable after their mother died. He pined for her, became a recluse, and stopped taking care of things.
I turn toward Claire, who is standing just inside the bedroom. She’s hesitant and quiet now. I have to reach around her to close the door and lock it while she chews on her bottom lip and rubs her arms.
I’m careful with her arms because they’re covered in bruises, so I gently rub up and down her biceps. Goosebumps rise on her skin. “Look at me, Claire.”
She meets my gaze. She looks nervous.
“Baby, stop fretting. We’re not going to have sex.” I assume that’s what she’s worried about.
She rolls her eyes. “You’re a guy. I know you didn’t browbeat me into moving in with you and unpacking my stuff into drawers only to cuddle.”
I flinch. “Claire, I hate that you think I would pressure you to have sex. I would never. I know I joke and taunt you constantly, but I’m serious. I’m not kidding about the fact that I want you in my life forever. We’ll have decades to make love. There’s no rush.”
She glances at the bed. “We’re going to take off a lot of clothes and lie on that fancy bed, then you’re going to kiss me until I can’t think, and I’m going to want more.”
I hear her. “That’s all true, but I will not take my boxers off. You have my word.”
She sighs. “I don’t even know if that’s what I want. I’ve never met anyone who makes me as horny as you do. Hell, I’ve never known anyone who makes me horny at all. It would be easier to just have sex and get it over with.”
I chuckle. “We’re never going to do things the easy way, baby. It’s not who we are. We’re going to argue and torment each other every day because that’s us. We’re also going to fuck hard and love hard. I promise. But not tonight.”
She wiggles free of me and wanders around the room, touching things absentmindedly. “I don’t like being in charge of Gretchen.”
“I know, and we’ll work on that.”
“Gretchen has been here for decades. She should be the woman of the house. I’m not equipped to deal with the role you’ve thrust at me. I didn’t think it through before. I didn’t even have time to think it through. I can’t move into this mansion and run it like a plantation from a hundred years ago.”
I follow her, but I keep my hands to myself for now. “Claire, you’re smart and spunky and totally capable of running this estate.”
She crosses her arms again as though cold. “I’m sure Gretchen thinks I’m a child.”
I shake my head. “That’s not true. It’s very obvious Gretchen is thrilled by your arrival.”
Claire glances toward the door. “She thinks I’m up here spreading my legs for the rich heir.”
“Claire,” I admonish, stepping directly in front of her. “She’s not thinking that.”
Her voice rises. “You don’t know that.”
I want her to know this is her home now. Maybe not necessarily this mansion or the pink room, but with me . Decisions about this estate will not be made unilaterally by me. She and I will be a team.
Wherever she goes, I go. If Claire were to tell me she hates this mansion and everything associated with this town and the people in it, I would take her away and never look back.
I don’t give a fuck about my inheritance. I came here because I was intrigued; it seemed like my destiny was calling me to Wilde. All signs pointed to jumping ship in New York and driving across the country.
I was right. I was only here for thirty minutes when I walked out of Thomas’s office and found the most perfect woman I’ve ever met standing next to my truck, challenging me to a duel.
Claire is mine. From now on, I’m at her beck and call. I know I’ve spent the day tossing one thing after another at her, but she has all the power. She will for the rest of my life.
She groans and rolls her head back.
I slide my hand around her neck and bring her gaze to mine. “There are things I can’t change. One of them is that I need to be here in the mansion for a while because I was the first to arrive. Someone has to get the ball rolling in this town.”
Her shoulders slump, and she reaches for the front of my T-shirt to smooth her palms over my pecs. “I know,” she whispers.
“I want you by my side. I want you to help me. You’re my source of information, but you’re also my life partner. If you’re uncomfortable and you hate it here, we’ll move out and live somewhere else. I promise. Will you stay here with me for a while until things settle down?”
She wrinkles her nose. “You make it seem so simple.”
“It is simple.”
She shakes her head. “People will think I’m a gold digger.” She slaps a palm against her forehead. “I should’ve stayed with my parents.”
“No, baby. It wasn’t safe. And who cares what people think? All that matters is what we think, what we know. Let them talk. Eventually, when they realize we’re not separating for any reason, they’ll lose interest. Do you honestly care if gossiping citizens accuse you of things they know nothing about? Would you walk away from what you feel for me just because you don’t want anyone to think ill of you?”
“No, of course not. It’s just so fast. No one will believe it.”
“Eventually, they will. I could take the condoms off the delivery list, and we could really give them something to talk about in a few months when they see you round with my child,” I tease, palming her stomach. Ever since we discussed birth control, I haven’t been able to get this visual out of my mind.
Claire pregnant with my child. It makes my cock hard. I don’t know who I am. I’ve changed. I’ve met this perfect woman, and now I want everything with her. Including babies. A dozen of them.
I’ve never once had sex without a condom. I can’t believe I’m contemplating it. But I am. When I started the discussion about birth control earlier, I was merely gathering information, but as soon as the words came out of my mouth, I almost wished I hadn’t said anything at all.
I would never take my girl bare without her permission, but I find myself wanting to reopen this discussion and talk her into letting me fill her sweet cunt without protection.
She shoves my hand away and shudders. “Not a chance. Nice try.”
I kiss her neck. The idea of keeping my girl filled with my come day and night has embedded itself in my head now. It’s not going to let go. I slide my hand down to her flat tummy and press against it as I whisper in her ear, “I can already picture watching you grow. You’re going to be so fucking sexy when you’re pregnant.”
“Ryder…” Her voice is weak. I’m winning. She leans back and shoves at my hand. “We’re not discussing this.”
“I will table it for now.” I kiss her lips. “Officially tabled. And as for tomorrow, I will drive you to the bakery at whatever time you want to get there and pick you up after work. I’ll even bring your car back up here and see if I can figure out what’s wrong with it.”
She eyes me skeptically at the change of subject, and she should. “I have whiplash. Do you know anything about cars?”
I chuckle. “Nothing.”
Her face softens, and she giggles, warming my heart. “Then what are you going to do with it?”
“Tiago and I will open the hood, look inside, verify all the parts are in there, and then turn to Google.”
She giggles harder and sets her forehead against mine.
“I wouldn’t want your father to think I can’t take care of your car.”
“Except, you can’t. How will you explain that?”
“Mmm. I’ll ensure it makes it to another town, gets fixed, and then bring it back.”
“And then what? Tell my father you did the work just to impress him?”
“No. I’ll make up a lie and say it needed a part I didn’t have.”
We’re both laughing now. I like this. I like making her smile. I’m relieved she’s no longer panicking about our sleeping arrangements. I walk her backward until she’s flat against the wall next to the bathroom, grip her hips, and kiss her.
I start with her lips until she’s whimpering and then nibble a path to her ear, where I bite down just hard enough to make her shiver. “How about if you use the bathroom first.”
She sighs softly. “I need a shower.”
“Do you need any help?”
“Mmm. Tempting, but no.”
I don’t want her to feel pressured, so I turn her and point at the door. “Go on.”
She looks back at me as though she doesn’t fully trust me not to follow her inside. “You sure you don’t want to micromanage me?”
I growl. “Baby, you’re on thin ice. I’m trying to be a gentleman here. If you keep pushing, I’ll macro manage you. I bet I can find something to restrain your wrists to the showerhead while I wash your sexy body, teasing every inch of you until you need to come so badly you beg me.”
She stops walking and grabs the door frame, staring at me. After several seconds, she licks her lips. “Ryder…?”
“Yes, baby?”
“I’m scared out of my mind that this is an apparition. That you’ll lose interest in me after a few days. I’m scared I’ll be left with a broken heart and never be able to pick up the pieces. I’m scared of losing myself. I’m scared of not being mature enough for you. I’m scared that you’ll be displeased with my inexperience when we have sex. I’m even a little nervous about actually having sex for the first time. But you should know, when you say things like that… When you tease me about all these things you dream of doing to me… I want that. I want you to restrain me and wash my body. I almost can’t stand upright at the thought.”
I approach her slowly and stroke her cheek with one finger. “I know that, baby. It’s why I keep teasing you. Eventually, you’ll trust that I mean every word, both the fact that I’m yours forever and that I’ll make good on my threats. I will take you places you’ve only ever dreamed of and make you scream so loud they hear you in town. When you’re sure I’m serious and you believe me, we’ll go there.”
She inhales slowly as her eyes close. “Okay,” she whispers before stepping back and shutting the door.
I’m left staring at the door, knowing that in a minute, she will be naked on the other side, just a few feet away from me. I want her so badly I’m trembling. But I want her to feel my conviction deep in her soul before we consummate this. I don’t want my girl to have any doubts about me. I’ll show her I mean every word every day until she’s certain.