Sixteen
I told him my fucking name! What the hell just happened? I’d had the phone placed there when I saw his bike on my external camera. I might have moved on, but I knew he’d return at some point. I was surprised it had taken him so long, but I’d had someone willing to place the phone, for a crazy amount of money. Apparently they were pissed when they realised it was a biker from the local club, and they’d insisted on double the fee, but I didn’t care. What’s money, when it’s all you have?
I’d watched him on that camera as we spoke, his eyes devouring the alley, the buildings, and every darkened corner, while mine devoured him. I loved the way he moved. He prowled on the spot, like a predator, and he was pissed. Seriously pissed. At me. And it was sexy as hell.
I’d never risk being near him without him being knocked out though. He’d made it clear that if he got his hands on me, my choices would be taken away. I’d die before I let that happen, but my suspicion was that he planned it the other way around. He wanted to punish me first, then kill me.
And so instead? Instead we jerked off to the sound of each other’s voices. Was that expected? Normal? Had I imagined it would ever happen? I’d expected him to call me some vile names, and threaten to kill me, especially after he pointed out how dangerous he and his brothers were.
In some ways, this was all Alicia’s fault. She’d brought me a man that I couldn’t stop thinking about, and couldn’t sleep without dreaming about, at least on the rare occasions I did actually sleep. I’d spent the last decade or so barely sleeping, so my body would probably go into shock, if I slept through a night.
His voice though. Wow . Deep, kind of growly, and raspy. It sounded so different from our night together, when it was mostly heard in the form of whispered curses, and grunts of pain. I found that I liked to hear him speaking, even if he was pissed. Hell, maybe even because of it.
His verbal growl had rumbled through the phone, and sent chills down my spine. My fingers had been in my underwear before he’d finished a single sentence. I’d been impossibly wet already.
He’d demanded that I join him, said he’d fuck me on his bike, or break that bed with me, and I wanted that. So badly. His threats, because that’s what they were really, were dark and intense, and I’d had to fight the urge to drive there, and let him have me.
It had been a good thing that I’d been miles away at the time. If I’d been in my old flat, two floors up from where he’d stood, I might have found my way out into that alleyway, to experience everything he’d threatened.
I shouldn’t be dwelling on him, but focusing on moving on. Getting out of town would be a better idea. I’d done my thing enough times in this town that people could figure it out. Someone would talk eventually. Most men were ashamed if they realised what happened, and they didn’t dare talk about it.
It was how I had been getting away with it for so damn long. I wasn’t hurting them, not really. Their masculinity probably took a bit of a hit, but why should I care about that? Who’d cared about me?
Ryder
Y eah, I walked into a shitstorm alright, and I couldn’t hide the mess I’d made of myself either. I’d tried wiping it off, but cum is cum, and it’s pretty fucking obvious what it is when it dries.
I’d shoved my way past Torch and Ice, and was halfway to my room, when Reacher grabbed my arm, and pulled me around to face him. His eyes seemed to reluctantly pass over me, and then his eyebrows raised.
“Anything you want to tell me, brother?”
I pulled my arm free. “Yeah, I had a really nice wank, thanks for asking. You want details?”
He snorted, following me as I headed into my room. I hadn’t shut the door, because the bastard would follow either way.
I headed straight for my shower, and took my time, knowing that they would be getting more and more pissed by the time I reappeared. And when I did, hair still dripping water down my back, a thick towel around my waist, I had the whole fucking crew waiting for me.
Reacher and Stitch, Ice, Torch, Has-Been. Has-Been? When did he join the fucking boy band?
“Why’s he here?” I asked, jerking a thumb at him, and seeing the hurt in his eyes at my question.
“If you don’t want me here, I can leave.”
“He stays,” Reacher barked, glancing at Ice who was fiddling with something. The phone! He had the phone. I looked around for my jeans, but they were in the bathroom where I’d stripped off.
“How the fuck did you get that?” I snapped, marching over to him to snatch it back.
He leaned out of reach, and Has-Been sighed.
“Brother, get dressed. We’re not going anywhere, but you need to calm the fuck down.”
I glared at him, but clearly nobody was willing to go any further until I either dressed, or calmed down, and he was right; either one would probably lead to the other. I strode back to my dresser, and rummaged, digging out underwear, clean jeans, and a t-shirt, and then I decided to punish them all for hanging in my room, by dropping the towel, and bending over to grab my underwear from the bed.
“Jesus!”
“Asshole!”
Yeah, that’d teach them to invade my personal space like this, and oddly I felt a grin creep across my face. Maybe things weren’t as bad as I had thought. She was still around, which meant I still had a chance of catching her, and my cock wasn’t completely dormant, just seemed to be most interested in her. Maybe fucking her again would be the way to get control back of my own body.
“You just gonna stand there, or you gonna get fucking dressed? We’re not here for a free show,” I heard Stitch muttering behind me, and I took the prompt for what it was, and finished getting dressed.
“Okay, I’m dressed. So who the fuck came into my bathroom when I was in the shower?”
Several fingers pointed at Torch, who shrugged.
“Better me seeing you butt naked than these guys.”
“Yeah, well that ship has just fucking sailed,” Reacher muttered, rubbing a hand over his face.
I shrugged. “You told me to get dressed. That was me getting dressed. What, am I gonna hide behind a towel like a girl?”
Ice snorted, tossing the phone on the table, and to say I snatched it as fast as lightning, would be an understatement. It went firmly into my pocket.
“You got a crush on that phone?” Reacher asked, his eyebrows raised.
“I’m just keeping it close, in case she calls again. That’s how I’ll find out where she is.”
He pointed at the seat they’d left for me, because he and Stitch had the sofa, and Ice had my other chair. Torch and Has-Been were standing behind him, watching his screen as he did whatever the fuck he was doing.
I sat down, waiting for someone to start quizzing me. Reacher was watching me, his eyebrows raised, like he was waiting for me to speak first, but I just shrugged at him.
“For fuck’s sake. Did you fuck her?” He snarled, and I grimaced as all eyes landed on me.
“How? You know if I’d had her within reach, I’d have taken her, and brought her here. She just called me. She had someone leave that phone on my bike.”
“Where?” He gritted out, and I stared him straight in the eye.
“Back at that fucking love-nest of hers.”
“You went back there. Alone.” His voice was flat. “We trusted you to use a little more fucking common sense than that.”
“I don’t know why, Pres. He’s proving time and time again that he’s a complete dipshit.” That was Ice, so I flipped him off.
“I just ended up there. It wasn’t exactly planned.”
“That’s even fucking worse. You didn’t even think about what you were doing. What if she’d been there?”
I shifted forward on my chair, fixing him with a glare.
“I’d have fucking taken care of shit. She’s a woman, and I’m a man. Without the benefit of her fucking roofies, I can take her easily, and she knows it. That’s why she was hiding.”
Ice was watching me. “So… out of interest, how did she even know you were there?”
I shrugged. “Like I said, I think she was hiding nearby. Maybe she even lives there somewhere.”
He shook his head. “I checked into all residents in the nearby buildings. The only one that could have been her moved out over a week ago.”
I stared at him. “Well, that’s a bit suspicious, brother. You don’t think that was worth us knowing?”
“We knew,” Reacher said, leaning back on the sofa.
Oh. Charming.
“Was her name Tori?” I asked Ice casually, hearing him curse.
“So it was her?”
I shrugged, enjoying winding him up for a bit, because everyone seemed to think my business was theirs for some reason.
“That’s not really an answer.”
“Tori Hastings. There’s no paper trail on her, but since she’s a serial rapist or whatever, I’m guessing she’s been playing her cards a little close to her chest.”
“Rapist?” That was Has-Been. The only asshole in the room who apparently really didn’t know what had gone down that night. It helped. It made me think that maybe the entire fucking club didn’t know.
I watched him as he absorbed that fact.
“That cunt,” he muttered, nodding at me.
“Any luck tracking the GHB?” I asked Ice, since the cat was firmly out of the fucking bag now. He shook his head.
“Alicia says she gets those for the bitch.”
“Tori,” I corrected Reacher, before I realised what I was doing. “Uh… yeah, the bitch.” What the fuck.
“So your MILF gets her the drugs, drugs the men, and brings them to her. How the fuck doesn’t she know more about her? She must have met her. She must know more than she’s letting on.”
Reacher was rubbing at his piercings, his head low. Finally he spoke.
“And that, brother, is the only reason she’s not dead yet. She said she brings the men outside, and the bitch, I’m sorry, Tori, your girlfriend , is waiting outside in a car. She helps her load them in, and then she drives away, and that’s job done. The money gets transferred in advance.”
Has-Been had gone pale. “Wait… you guys are saying there’s some chick out there, doing this to men on the regular?”
We all looked at him again. “Why is he here now? We’ve kept this between us until today.”
Reacher gestured at my shocked brother.
“He insisted. For some dumb reason he thinks you deserve his support, even though you’re acting like an entitled asshole again.”
Oh . I nodded. “Yeah, sorry. She got me riled up again.”
“So riled up that you jizzed all over yourself?” Stitch asked quietly, finally getting to the one question I wasn’t prepared for, no matter how long we put it off. I guess they’d all seen the mess when I got back.
Everyone was firmly focused on me, so ignoring him wasn’t looking like it’d work.
“Fucking hell! We had… I mean… you know, I haven’t been able to… since it happened.”
I heard a few of them curse quietly, but they still waited. They still expected me to tell them even more of my personal fucking business.
“We had fucking phone sex, okay?”
Jaws dropped, and then they all started speaking at once, before Reacher yelled at them to shut it.
“You had phone sex with the woman who forced you to fuck her? I mean, exactly how many fucking screws are loose in that head of yours? ”
I laid my head back on the cushions behind me, and stared at the ceiling, taking a deep breath, and trying to answer calmly, because how the hell was I supposed to know the answer to that.
“I don’t know,” I finally said, and I heard him cursing again.
“What? I don’t know why. I didn’t understand it then, and I don’t understand it now. It doesn’t make sense. She was talking to me, and saying things… about that night, and suddenly I had a fucking boner, okay? And it’s been weeks, man. Fucking weeks. I thought it was dead, but then there it was. She was already touching herself, and I guess I figured, why should she be the only one getting any pleasure this time? I deserved to fucking get off.”
Now nobody was looking at me. They were all glancing elsewhere.
“What?”
Ice smirked, pointing at my lap. Jesus . I dragged a cushion from behind me, and rested it on my lap, covering up my second boner of the day. Suddenly I’m Ron fucking Jeremy.
“Remind me to never, ever, put my face near any of his cushions,” Stitch murmured quietly, and the next thing we were all chuckling.
“Brother, you are all kinds of fucked in the head. No judgement though. You needed to do that, and thank fuck you did it out of sight of the rest of us.” Reacher was still smirking.
“If she calls again, I’ll be able to triangulate it. Might get us no further than last time, but you can use your ‘obvious charms’ to try and draw her out,” Ice said.
“Yeah, because that worked really well today.”
He was watching me, his head tilted.
“I need to get to that alleyway. I reckon the bitch has a camera on the outside too. Maybe it’s still active even now.”
Suddenly people were moving, and there was a plan, and I ignored them, because I was still hiding my hard cock under that cushion. Jesus .
Finally only Torch and Has-Been remained, both taking a seat on the sofa. I stared at them with frustration, wondering why the fuck they didn’t go too, so I could take care of business.
“Oh… did you want to watch?”
I received identical smirks, and middle fingers from both of them, and groaned, resting my arms over the cushion, trying to hide how desperately I wanted to jerk off again.
“What?”
Has-Been glanced at Torch, then looked back at me. He still looked hurt.
“Why wouldn’t you tell me, brother? I could have helped.”
Jesus. “I didn’t want anyone to know.”
He pointed at Torch. “You told him. And Ice? Really? Ice before me?”
They weren’t going away any time soon, clearly. I groaned, as I gave up on a few moments of fucking pleasure.
“I didn’t tell any of them. Reacher and Stitch were the only ones I told, or, I guess… they worked it out with me. They brought in Ice, and Torch.”
“So nobody thought that I could be useful?”
Torch elbowed him. “Will you stop being a little bitch? It was a difficult situation. Really not something a man would want to tell his friends.”
“Yeah, I get that. You think I don’t realise that? I’m saying I could have fucking helped!” Has-Been snapped, standing up and wandering into the kitchen. He rummaged around, and I heard the kettle being switched on.
“Has?”
He sighed, turning to look at us, his eyes suddenly looking haunted.
“You think child stars have it easy? You think we don’t get preyed on by every fucking perv in the business?”
Jesus Christ . We both stood up, my former boner forgotten.
“What are you saying?”
He moved forward, leaning his hands on the crappy excuse for a breakfast bar, his eyes on me.
“I’m saying that I know what it’s like, okay? Only I was preyed on by men, brother . Too young to fight them, or even really understand how wrong their behaviour was.”
Torch cursed beside me.
“You… how the fuck does that shit even happen?”
Has-Been glared at him. “Think I’m making this up? You think it’s a fun story to tell? You think it’s fun being a fucking child, and having men touch you, and tell you that it’s okay, because it’s just acting. Screen tests. Fucking auditions .”
The kettle boiled, but he completely ignored it. His fists were clenched now, as his mind went back to that dark time none of us had known about.
“The first time one of them raped me, I was too afraid to fucking tell. That went on for six fucking months. Six. Months. I was twelve.”
My god. I rubbed my hands over my face, wishing I could wipe away the harsh truths we were being hit with. This was so much fucking worse than some woman getting off without my consent. That poor fucking guy. Poor kid, even.
“See? There it is. The fucking pity on both of your faces . This. This right here, is why we don’t talk about this shit, and I get that. But, Ryder, brother… of all people, I understand. I get it. The shame. The humiliation. The fucking disgust. You asked me once, about the scars on my arms. That’s how I used to cope. See, they didn’t just stop hiring me because I grew up. I was a fucking mess by my late teens. Cutting myself to crap, and taking every fucking drug I could get my hands on.”
I sighed, stepping up to the counter, so we were literally only the width of the counter apart.
“Brother, you wanna get revenge on anyone, and I’m fucking there.”
He shook his head slowly. “Old news, innit. I’m nearly thirty. Nobody gives a fuck about kiddie-fiddlers from the fucking last few decades. It always was and always will be my word against theirs, and they’re all so fucking protected. Revered by the industry. I’m just some scummy biker, ex addict, fucking loser .”
I saw Torch approaching us, leaning on that counter so he was even closer to Has-Been.
“You’re none of those fucking things. You’re our damn brother, and you want to tear some of these bastards new assholes, I’m game. Got a new knife I wanna try out anyway.”
“Jesus Christ. I’ve seen what you do with knives and fire. Fuck that,” I muttered, a shudder of horror trickling down my spine.
Has-Been snorted. “I’ve moved on. I don’t need revenge on anyone. I just… I guess, I figured since Ryder is dealing with his business being shared with us, that maybe he’d feel better knowing he’s not alone.”
I stared at him. “I’m never going to be okay with what you just fucking told me. I don’t know how the fuck you dealt with that shit before, aside from all the self-destructive shit, but you have us now, brother. You never have to watch your own back again.”
He nodded once, like he wanted to move on, turning around and setting about making coffee, the kettle back on and boiling away.
“So what are you gonna do if she calls again?” Torch asked me, giving Has-Been the ‘out’ he needed, while I simply shrugged.
“ Get a boner? I don’t know. I don’t know why it happened before.”
Has-Been shoved coffees at us.
“Our brains are complex bastards. Somehow yours is connecting her with sexual pleasure. Maybe it remembers more about that night than you’ve actually recalled.”
I wrapped my hands around the mug. It actually looked like a proper cup of coffee, not that sludge Reacher prefers. Thank fuck for that.
“Who knows? Nothing else was working, and suddenly her voice in my ear was all it took. It was a fucking relief.”
I couldn’t help but feel like an asshole, for even talking about this in front of Has-Been. If I thought what had happened to me could even compare to what he’d been through…
“Stop it,” he muttered, reading my thoughts as if they were written on my face, which knowing me, they probably were.
“Sorry. It just seems so fucking pathetic and irrelevant now I’m putting it in perspective. So some bitch rode me while I was out of it. So fucking what?”
He glared at me again. “Consent is fucking consent, regardless of age, or gender, or any other fucking thing. I’m sure you’d have happily dipped your dick in her if you’d been aware, but she didn’t give you that choice. That pisses me the hell off.”
He could be a feisty bastard.
“So… apart from her name, you get anything else of use? Apart from blowing your load?” Torch asked, leaning his hip against the counter.
I thought back, ignoring his attempt to wind me up.
“Uh… well, she knows my name…”
“How?”
“I told her.”
“Prick. What the hell did you do that for?” It wasn’t like I didn’t ask myself the same damn question.
“It just came out. It’s not like it’s gonna do any harm. She already knows what I look like, and where I fucking live. Hell… she knows what I look like naked. She knows what my cock feels like inside her. She mentioned that a lot actually.”
Torch was shaking his head, looking mildly disgusted.
“She’s just trying to get inside your head. Like what she did wasn’t enough already.”
“I felt like an idiot after we did that… I felt like she’d used me again. I don’t know. I just want to find her, and be in the same fucking place as her, so we can work this shit out.”
Torch smirked at me, and I knew I wasn’t going to like what he was about to say.
“I have a new blowtorch I’ve also been looking to try out.”
I held back a gag. The man should not be allowed near anyone with a knife or a blowtorch.
“What? You want the bitch dead, right? She killed a man. That could have been you.” He looked a tiny bit defensive, even though technically he wasn’t wrong.
“I don’t know. Maybe.”
I couldn’t handle their stares. Did I want her dead? Or did I just want her tied to a bed, for me to fuck? I had no idea anymore.
N aturally she didn’t call again, at least, not until she could be sure I was alone, hence her call at three in the fucking morning. By the time I realised a phone was ringing, and was awake enough to grab it, I already had two missed calls.
“What the fuck,” I grumbled, not even realising which phone I’d answered, or what the hell was going on.
“Sometimes I drive by the compound, trying to catch a glimpse of you,” Tori said, her voice low and husky. Jesus . My dick twitched almost instantly, and I shoved a hand over the covers, to rest on my stomach. If he got hard, I was gonna make myself cum. I wasn’t wasting any chances.
“Are you out there now?” I asked, sitting up, ready to go out there and find her. My cock was rigid, and my hand instinctively wrapped around it.
“No.” She giggled. “I’m not a fool. If I were out there and told you, you’d send them to capture me. You’d hurt me. You and your brutal brothers.”
I snorted. “They’re not so bad.” I didn’t know why I said that. Some of them really were all bad .
“That’s not what you told me before. You warned me about how dangerous you all are.”
I fell back against my pillows, my urgency dissipating a little, because I’d been all for getting out there and finding her right now.
“They wouldn’t hurt you if I said not to.”
She sighed, and I heard bedcovers moving in the background.
“You took Alicia, and for all I know, she’s dead. Did you hurt her first?”
I grimaced, because ultimately I knew that bitch was just fine. Probably worming her way into Reacher’s pants, if his recent behaviour was anything to go by. But I also knew that telling her she was alive was a risk. She might try to rescue her, or send the police. At the very least, she’d see us as weak. Me .
“I spoke to her briefly.” I figured that was enough. That’d leave it open to her imagination.
“She was a good person. She has a mother, you know. She’s in a care facility, and she only helped me to pay for her care.” Jesus Christ. I wondered if Reacher even knew that, or if I should even tell him.
“She really should have found a better way to earn that money, Tori. Assisting a serial rapist isn’t something decent people do.”
She shifted again, and I heard her take a sudden breath. Was she touching herself again? But then, wasn’t I?
My phone buzzed on the bedside cabinet, my own phone, I leaned over to look at the screen before it timed out. Ice. He knew .
“Is it rape, though? They hit on her. They wanted sex, and they got sex, with no consequences. I was good to them. To you.”
She really believed that shit? I wondered idly if Ice was actually somehow listening to our call. He’d better not be.
“Is that how you see it?” I asked her, sliding my hand over my cock, sucking in a breath as my own touch felt like it could be hers.
She sighed again, a long low exhale, and I pictured her sliding her fingers into her pussy. I mean, I couldn’t really picture her, because I didn’t fucking know what she looked like, but in my mind’s eye, there was flowing red hair, and plum coloured nails, and a shaved pussy, and Jesus…
I was jerking my cock in swift moves now, just at the thought of her.
“I want to know what you look like,” I hissed, trying to slow down, and draw out the process, because once we’d finished, I knew I’d be pissed and frustrated again.
“If you knew that, you’d be able to find me. A picture of me would be a dangerous risk to take.”
“If you don’t trust me to see you, then you don’t get to fuck around with me.” I ended the call, and dropped my head back on the pillows again, my breaths gasping out of me, as my hand dropped to my thigh, and I cursed myself for getting pissy, when I should have just used her to blow my load.
When the phone rang again a moment later, I grabbed it and stared at the screen for a moment. Incoming video call . What. The. Fuck.