Chapter 16
SIXTEEN
Gently, I cup Arlo’s cheeks in my hands. The admission catches me off guard, and it takes me a moment to try and figure out whether he’s messing with my head or not. But when I look into those bright, sincere eyes of his, all I can see is the raw honesty and truth that he’s not trying to hide.
“You’re a virgin?”
Arlo nods, his cheeks feeling hot under my fingertips. The color deepens, a dark red spread all over his face. He looks so adorable when he blushes, and it’s driving me insane.
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“Well,” he drags his bottom lip between his teeth, my eyes zeroing in on the small action.
My stomach does a backflip, the flutter in my chest intensifying.
“I just didn’t want you to know. I mean, I was only eighteen when I met you for the first time.
And ever since, I haven’t wanted to sleep with anyone except you. So, I waited.”
My heart almost bursts at his confession. He looks like a little puppy, all shy and adorable. Which is weird, given that he’s one of the deadliest men I know of. With a small chuckle, I lean in and peck his lips briefly.
When I pull back, something resembling a whine follows, and I can’t help but crack a smile at the behavior. He runs his hands through my hair, trying to detangle the wet parts of it, being as gentle as possible.
“Does it bother you that I don’t have any experience?”
His question throws me off, but I recover quickly. “Not at all. I’m just surprised?”
“Why would you be surprised?” His fingers abruptly stop their movements, and he looks at me with a serious expression. “Butterfly, I breathe and live for you. It’s not that ridiculous.”
“It’s not,” I shake my head. “But are you sure you want me to be your first? I mean… given everything that I’ve done…”
I pause, the insecurities hitting me harder than I’d like to admit.
The truth is, I never had a choice or a say in whom I’d lost my virginity to.
It was painful, I was bleeding a lot, and it’s one of the worst memories that I have.
I want Arlo to be with someone who isn’t as damaged as me, both mentally and physically.
Because at the end of the day, that nagging voice at the back of my head tells me he can do so much better than be stuck with me for the rest of his life.
“Don’t,” he warns, his voice dropping an octave. “Don’t even go there. You’re the only person I ever want to be with. If that means you never being comfortable having sex, so be it. It’s not a big deal. I can live without sex. I can’t live without you.’’
“Are you sure?”
“Positive,” he says quickly. “You’re all I need, Blair. In any way, you’d let me have you.”
With a deep breath, I lean in and kiss him.
He returns the kiss immediately, his hand cupping the back of my head, tilting my head to the side, giving himself better access.
The moment we kiss, all of my worries vanish, even if it’s for a little while.
He’s always been able to tame the monsters inside me, to keep them at bay.
Slowly, I push him to lie down, and he lets me. I get on top of him, his hands immediately falling to my thighs. He pushes his tongue into my willing mouth, a small moan leaving my lips. He all but growls at the sound, his chest rumbling.
Arlo breaks the kiss, looking at me with eyes that are full of desire. “Are you sure about this?”
I nod. “I’m sure.”
“Just tell me if you want me to stop. We’re doing this for you, butterfly.”
Before I can respond, Arlo flips us over, crawling between my legs. He kisses me again while working quickly to get his pants and underwear off, and when he does, I’m left speechless, mouth open in shock.
I had an inkling that he’d be quite gifted down there, but I didn’t think he’d have a literal snake in his pants.
The tip of his cock is already oozing with precum, the head thick, pink, and almost throbbing.
The veins along the length make my mouth water for a moment, and when he grips it, stroking it a few times, I feel my body reacting.
Moonlight peeks through the curtains, illuminating his white hair.
His bare torso, packed with ink, glistens under the soft streaks of luminescence.
He grins, that wicked smile of his that gets my knees weak.
His tooth gem shines brightly, and I force myself to look away from him, feeling my chest tightening at the sight.
Fuck, he’s beautiful.
Arlo gets off the bed, finds his wallet, and pulls out a condom. He’s back between my legs quickly, rolling the latex on his aching cock with ease. My brows furrow in confusion as to why he’d use a condom, especially if it’s his first time, then the realization hits me.
He knows no one was ever considerate enough to use condoms with me.
He’s doing it for me, not for him. He leans in, kissing my neck.
The growls and groans that come from his lips make me shiver, my hands tangling in his hair.
It’s only now that I truly realize how long his hair’s gotten over the time we spent apart.
“You smell like me,” he murmurs against my skin, nipping on the spot where my neck meets my shoulder. “Fuck, you smell so good, butterfly.”
I can’t form words to respond. Instead, I grip his chin tightly and kiss him. Arlo’s more than eager to kiss me back, his cock lined up against my entrance. I tense up, causing him to break the kiss. He pulls back enough to look at me.
“Relax, butterfly,” he murmurs, his gravelly voice sending shivers down my spine. “I’ve got you. It’s just me. You hold all the power here. If you want me to stop, just say it.”
“Don’t stop.”
Arlo nods, then slowly starts pushing in. Deep, loud moans come from my throat, and Arlo barely holds himself together, body trembling. He pushes his cock all the way inside, pausing for a moment and letting me get used to his massive size.
Then, he starts moving.
It’s slow at first. A steady, gentle rhythm that tugs on my heartstrings. I pull the shirt over my head and throw it aside, my nipples hardening at the exposure to the colder temperature.
Arlo dips his head down, capturing one aching bud in his mouth, swirling his tongue around it, before sucking on it.
It’s when he starts picking up the pace, and my emotions go into overdrive.
He’s reaching the sweet spot inside me, time and time again, and I’m positive I won’t be able to hold on for much longer.
“Arlo,” I moan. “Faster.”
He doesn’t need to be told twice. He pulls my legs to wrap around his waist, and I oblige automatically. He holds the back of my thighs, angling my body upward. His thrusts reach deeper, and my eyes roll to the back of my head in pure ecstasy.
“You’re so beautiful, butterfly,” he croaks out, voice full of emotions. He snaps his hips into mine, leaning down and capturing my lips in another deep kiss. “All mine.”
“Only yours.”
My words are muffled by the kiss, but I know he heard me. He growls into my mouth, going rougher. My mind is a frenzy, a state of complete and utter bliss. His hands roam all over my body, touching every inch of it.
His lips follow suit — I can feel them everywhere.
He sucks on my collarbone, then drags his tongue all over the pulse point on my neck.
He nibbles on the spot, alternating between using his lips and his teeth.
The sensations cause my mind to go into overdrive, and I’m slowly, but surely, reaching the highest peaks.
“Arlo,” my voice is barely above a whisper.
“Yes, butterfly?”
I can’t form words when I see him. Droplets of sweat drip down his forehead, his hair messy, thrown back. His pupils are blown out, the grey barely visible from the size of his pupil.
“I love you.”
He doesn’t stop the intense movements. Instead, he goes rougher, deeper, and faster because he knows it’s exactly what I need. He smiles, the softness of his expression making my heart flutter.
“I love you more, butterfly.”
My arms wrap around his head, and I hold onto him for dear life. He grabs my waist, then pulls me to sit on his lap. The change of the position makes me moan loudly, feeling just how deep he can reach.
“I’ll guide you.”
I nod when he puts his hands on my ass. He squeezes it tightly, then starts moving me up and down on his cock. My head falls back, hands on his shoulders for support as I try to mimic the movements on my own.
Arlo’s expression of love, arousal, and need for me only fuel the desire to please him better. I grip his shoulders tightly, bouncing on his lap roughly. Every thrust is met with a growl of approval, and that causes my ego to skyrocket.
“That’s it,” he moans. “That’s my good girl.”
Shivers spread all throughout my body, goosebumps prickling my skin at the praise. My breathing is heavy, and I try my best to keep up with the rough rhythm he set up for us.
“I’m so close.”
“That’s okay,” he murmurs, leaning forward and kissing my neck. “Let me see you fall apart for me, butterfly. Come on my cock.”
My head falls back, my vision clouded by a wave of pleasure I’ve never felt before. I can’t stop the orgasm that hits me roughly, and Arlo slams me down on his cock one last time as I come undone.
He follows suit, groaning deeply, not once taking his eyes off me as he reaches his climax, filling the condom entirely. He holds me there until we’re both done riding the waves of our orgasms, then he slowly releases me, and I slump against his chest.
He lies back down, hugging me tightly and securely against his chest, and pulling a thin blanket over us. His heart is beating furiously against my ear, and I can swear our hearts are beating in sync.
“You did so well, butterfly,” he mutters, kissing the top of my head.
I melt against him, burying my face more into his chest, trying to mold myself against him. He laughs softly, then adjusts his grip on me and holds me tighter. Neither of us speaks for a moment, trying to regain our breathing.
I’m about to speak, but I hear his phone ring in the pocket of the pants he discarded earlier.
With a groan, he slowly detangles himself from me, taking the condom off and throwing it in the small trashcan next to the dresser.
With a sigh, he bends, picks the phone up from his pocket, and puts it on his ear.
“Arlo speaking.”
That formal tone of his does something to me. It’s the way he always answers the phone, and it’s different from the usual, gentle voice he has when he’s talking to me.
In an instant, his entire body goes rigid, and I frown. I sit up, wrapped in the blanket, just staring at his face. My eyes widen when I see his own swell with tears. He doesn’t move, he doesn’t speak, and for a moment, I’m terrified he isn’t even breathing.
“Repeat that.”
After a few moments, the phone just falls out of his hand, landing on the floor with a loud thud. I scurry to my feet, standing in front of him. Worry spreads through my body, and I can’t help but feel pain at the state he’s in.
“Arlo? What’s wrong?”
He shifts a little to look at me, and the agony on his face is undeniable. He opens his mouth to speak, then closes it. My anxiety rears its ugly head to the surface, and when he speaks again, it feels like the ground beneath me just opened, and I’ve been swallowed into the darkest pits of Hell.
“Mom’s gone.”