Chapter 23
TWENTY-THREE
Arlo has barely moved from the position on the floor.
I managed to get his phone, call Lucas, and the two of us struggled to get him out of the studio.
Lucas shut down the diner for the day, and since we put Arlo to sit in the farthest booth in the corner, he hasn’t moved.
He’s had his head buried in my chest, barely breathing.
I can’t even begin to process all of this. It’s a fucking mess, and the guilt weighs on me heavily. However, all of that needs to take the backseat for now, because my primary focus is Arlo.
The whole reason he and I met was because we share the same enemies. His goal from the get-go was to help me get revenge and help save Luna. Only for him to be the one to kill her unknowingly.
Her last words kept replaying in my head like a broken record. The fact that she didn’t remember her family breaks my heart the more I think of it. This kind of guilt that Arlo’s being swallowed by is something I don’t think he’ll ever recover from.
“Arlo, please,” I whisper the words that barely reach him. My hand trembles as I lift his chin up to meet my eyes, and the sight tears me apart violently from the inside.
His eyes are bloodshot, the shade of his grey as light as the day.
Yet, the warmth, the softness that I adore so much are gone.
It’s replaced by nothingness, and he’s just a shell of his former self.
The pain, the agony, is overwhelming, and my beautiful boy allowed it all to win.
He’s empty; there’s nothing except a deep, dark void that sends chills down my body.
“Blair,” his voice is hoarse, and he clears his throat, slowly distancing himself from me, yet keeping one of his hands tightly wrapped around my wrist. “I killed her.”
“I know.”
“You asked me to stop, and I didn’t listen. I killed her.”
My throat tightens, a cold, icy chilling sensation spreading through my body at the monotone tone of his voice. He’s here, but he isn’t really with me. In his mind, he’s far, far away, and I don’t know how to pull him back.
“Arlo…”
“How am I supposed to tell Mom that I killed Luna? She’ll wake up, and then she’ll want to know.
” A bitter, choked laugh escapes him. “How am I supposed to tell Dad that I killed the only girl I was supposed to find? Mom’s entire life revolved around finding Luna and seeking revenge for Aunt Jane.
I failed them all, and now, there’s nothing I can do about it. ’’
“It wasn’t your fault.’’ I swallow a lump that forms in my throat. “You wanted to save me.”
“There were other ways to save you that didn’t require me killing her. Yet again, I acted on my impulses, and it led me straight to killing my cousin.”
I keep my mouth shut, silence surrounding us. There are no words of comfort that I could offer in this situation. He’s broken, inside out, and he doesn’t see the end of all the suffering. And yet again, it’s all because of me.
“Listen to me, sweetheart.” I cup his cheeks in my hands, holding him tightly with trembling hands.
I’m scared of what this unleashed anger that he feels toward himself will cause him to do, and the thought of losing him creeps up into my mind, and just like a fucking leech, I can’t shake it off.
“You’re not a fucking failure. You didn’t fail. You just didn’t know.”
He swallows, a cloud of rage falling over his features that shakes me to my core. I’ve never seen him so angry, and although it’s not directed toward me, I can’t help but feel like it should be.
“I didn’t know because I didn’t do all that I was supposed to do.
I thought I’d have more time to tackle all of this one by one.
I thought…” He trails off, eyes looking through me.
“I thought all of it would work out in my favor. I’m such a fucking moron.
Because she was alive yesterday, Blair. She was alive all these years, and instead of saving her from all the shit she’s been through, I was the one to kill her.
Me. She died by my hands, and her blood is on me. Her death is on me.:”
I’m stunned into silence. His voice carries a range of emotions, from gut-wrenching grief, raw vulnerability to the simmering fire of anger that just needs a drop of oil to let it all burn. But his face truly scares me, because there’s nothing. The stoic expression feels like a punch to the gut.
My hands drop from his cheeks, and we sit in silence. The dimmed lights of the diner shine enough for me to look at him well, observing any changes in his demeanor. Soft music plays in the background, the volume lowered down, and the sound of cars outside is the only thing that manages to sneak in.
Abruptly, Arlo stands up, my eyes following his every move, watching him like a hawk. His shoulders are tense, his entire body rigid as he walks over to the bar, and that just makes me want to scream.
He reaches for a bottle of whiskey, takes the cap off, and takes a swig. His throat bobs when he swallows, and within an instant, half of the bottle is gone. He lowers it onto the bar, wiping his mouth with his sleeve, just staring through the big windows.
For a moment, I debate whether or not to reveal everything that Zoe — no, Luna — told me.
But seeing him so broken, I know it would only add fuel to the fire, and it would hurt him even more.
Right now, I decide that the conversation between us will be a secret I’ll take to the grave. No one else needs to know.
Luna’s phone weighs heavily in my pocket, like I’ve stolen the missing piece of Arlo’s puzzle. But I can’t give the device away; I can’t be that selfish. A little girl’s life is at stake, and as terrible as it may sound, her life is more important than Luna’s death at the moment.
The front door of the diner swings open, my eyes snapping to the right. Cove strolls inside, with Aria following silently behind him. Both of them read the thick tension in the room, and neither of them wants to be the first one to speak.
“What do you want?” Arlo’s deep voice pierces through the silence, eyes glued on his best friend. He takes another big swing of the whiskey, not once looking away from Cove.
“Come with me,” Cove says. The simple words cause Arlo’s jaw to twitch, and he slams the bottle down onto the bar. I flinch at the outburst and steadily rise from my seat.
“No.”
“I wasn’t asking.”
“Get out,” Arlo grits out, his hand tightening around the bottle.
Cove doesn’t waste a single second. He approaches Arlo, his steps filled with purpose. He glances at me, though momentarily, before his attention shifts back to Arlo. He grabs his arm, then yanks him out of the bar.
Just as I’m about to jump in and at least try to intervene, Aria’s hand lands on my shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze.
“Don’t,” she whispers in my ear. “Let Cove handle this.”
“Let go, you motherfucker.” Arlo tries to wiggle out of Cove’s firm grip, but given the amount of alcohol he has in his system, it’s difficult to overpower him. Cove takes the opportunity to whack the back of Arlo’s head and drag him out of the diner.
“Blair,” Aria’s voice breaks me out of the trance. “Sit. We need to talk.”
I sit back down, almost automatically, at the sound of her serious voice. She slides into the seat across from me, and a little bit of relief washes over me. She’s looking better and better with each day, and I’m glad at least one of us is getting well.
“What is it?”
“I’ll cut right to the chase,” she says, then clears her throat. “You’re the only one sane right now. Well, half-sane.”
The notion makes me want to laugh. The fact that she thinks I’m the only sane one here, without knowing the war that’s waging inside of me, is amusing. Though, I don’t want to crush her spirit, and I’m rather curious to know where she’s going with this.
“Sure, let’s put it like that. Go on.”
“I barely remember Luna,’’ she sighs, leaning back and staring off into the distance.
“I just remember she’d play dolls with me from time to time.
Her disappearance truly shook our family.
Arlo remembers her more because, at some point, the two were partners in crime.
But I don’t remember her. I’m mourning the death of my family member, but I didn’t know her.
What happened is absolutely tragic, and I’ll always regret not being able to do more to help Arlo find her sooner. ’’
“Where are you going with this?”
She sucks in a deep breath, straightening up in her seat and looking right into my eyes.
“That being said, I’m keeping my head in the game.
Arlo is a fucking mess, Dad’s in prison, and Mom’s in a coma.
He needs you now, more than ever. Hell, you need each other.
But more importantly, I’ll need your help. ’’
A frown etches on my face, brows narrowing together. I fold my arms in front of my chest, trying to understand what she wants. “How could I possibly help you?”
“Your main priority will be making sure Arlo gets the help he needs.”
“What does that mean, exactly?”
“Cove told me,” Aria looks down, clutching her hands, “that Arlo started drinking severely. To the point of not even drinking water at all, all he drinks is whiskey. If he continues down this path, he’ll turn into an even bigger alcoholic.”
My mind drifts off to the past few days. Her words hit me like a ton of bricks, my heart hammering against my ribcage. She’s right — he’s been drinking nonstop. It’s a severe problem, and it doesn’t help that I started using heroin yesterday, too. But no one needs to know about that.
“You have a plan, don’t you?”
Aria nods, determination on her face. “Yes, but you won’t like it.”
“Try me.”
“Cove’s taking Arlo to a rehab center.”
“He is what?!”
“Look, Blair—”
“No,’’ I cut her off, standing up, gripping the edge of the table between us. “You worked with Cove to force Arlo into an institution?!”
“Don’t you dare yell at me.” Aria stands up too, eyes narrowed to slits.
“I understand that you’re angry that I didn’t consult you on this matter, but I need you to understand that neither you nor Arlo are in the right state of mind right now.
He needs to get off alcohol, because more than anything, I need my brother back. And the world needs the Ghost back.”
“You should’ve told me.”
A deep laugh reverberates through the room, but it’s void of any real humor. Instead, it’s laced with bitterness and a hint of sorrow. “I just told you, and you flipped out.”
I look away, jaw clenching. I hate that she’s right.
“How long will he be gone?”
“For as long as necessary. I’m taking over.”
My eyes snap to hers immediately. “What? You’re what—seventeen? You think you can rule an entire empire on your own?”
“I’m almost eighteen,” she corrects. “But more importantly, I was born into this family. I know ins and outs that no one else knows.”
I smirk. “Spoken like the daughter of Hudson De Santis.”
“More than that, I’m Noelle Campbell’s daughter.”
There’s pride on her face when she mentions her mother, and it’s a warming sight, especially during days this dark.
“You can’t do it on your own.”
“I won’t,’’ she says. “You’ll help me.”
“I will?”
“Yes,” she nods. “Because you’ll need something to do while Arlo’s away. You won’t visit him, you won’t write him letters. He needs to focus entirely on his recovery.”
The thought of not seeing him, hearing his voice, or at least sending him letters causes a pang of hurt to flutter in my chest. However, the rational part of me knows that Aria’s right — his well-being and getting sober are the most important things right now.
“Okay,” I concede. “What do you need me to do?”
“Firstly, refresh your training with Cove. He’s a gym rat and a fighter, so he’ll come up with a good meal plan for you to gain weight again.
In the meantime, I’ll prepare everything for Luna’s funeral.
Arlo deserves to say a proper goodbye when he comes out, and after that, I’ll find the fucking rat who let Amy Marshall out. ”
“Not to sound skeptical, but that’s a lot to do.”
“I’m not alone,” she offers with a small smile. “And I won’t let the empire my parents worked so hard on keeping steady fall right before my eyes. I won’t fail them. Besides, this is only for a while. Once all of this is over, I’m retreating.’’
“Good. Now, I have a favor.”
“Oh?” She plops back into the seat. “What is it?”
“Arlo has a work phone. I’m assuming you have one, too.”
“Yes,” she drawls out, suspicion lacing her tongue.
“Let me see it.”
Hesitantly, she pulls it out and tosses it to me. I catch it with ease, then immediately start looking through her contacts, scrolling down until I land on the letter K.
“What are you doing?”
“What I’m about to tell you doesn’t leave this room, do you understand me?”
Aria nods. “I promise.”
“Before Luna died, she told me something.”