Chapter 6
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Noah
Part of him was still amazed at where he was.
In Zara’s room, where they’d just had sex. Mind-blowing, out-of-this-world sex.
Twice.
In his wildest dreams, he would have never conjured this up.
Well, his wildest dreams, sure, but his regular dreams, definitely not.
Everything about being with her was surreal. He felt so happy in her presence and would stay there forever if he could. He’d one hundred percent thought she’d kick him out after sex. When he’d asked if she wanted him to leave, he’d been shocked when she’d basically asked him to stay.
She was a conundrum if there ever was one.
One he would happily spend a lifetime figuring out.
He should be exhausted. Between the game and sex, he shouldn”t have any energy left. That wasn’t the case. He didn’t want to waste a second of his time with Zara sleeping, even if that meant changing his game day routine the next day.
With the food ordered, he sat on the edge of the bed while she leaned against the headboard. He didn’t need to tell her about his panic attacks, but considering she’d been there for one of his biggest, he felt he owed her something. He wasn’t sure he could tell her the whole story yet, though.
“The night of the fire, the night we first met, I was on the verge of a panic attack. That’s why I basically dropped you and ran.”
Surprise lit up her face. “Oh, Noah.” Her voice was full of concern and empathy, and it wasn”t fake. “I wish I would have known.” She moved closer to him on the bed, placing her hand on his arm.
“How could you have? It was all I could do to get you out of the building before breaking down.”
“I was such a bitch to you. Both that night and since. I get why you never told me, but I still wish I had thought beyond myself. I was just so angry and annoyed at everything that happened that night, and I couldn”t see beyond my own emotions.”
He turned, facing her fully. “You weren’t a bitch. You were scared and confused. If having panic attacks has taught me anything, it’s not to judge, because we never know what anyone thinks or feels.” He ran his hand up her bare thigh. “Plus, I like sparring with you.”
She laughed lightly. “Of course you do.” She sagged against him, and he loved the feel of her leaning on him. He wished she’d lean on him more. “Do you ever wonder what would have happened if that fire hadn’t happened?”
“All the time.” If she knew how much, she might run away screaming.
“I never saw Aidan again after that night. Something about it didn’t feel right. Not that we were anything more than a few nights of fun.”
“I’d love to tell you he was upset over it, but Aidan wasn’t one for getting attached.”
“Neither was I. I’m still not.”
He wasn’t sure what to read into that confession, so he just let it go.
“I don’t do relationships, Noah.” She sat up from where she’d been leaning against him, looking directly at him. “Tonight was...well, it was a long time coming, I think, but I meant what I said earlier. This has to be it.”
“I heard you, and if that’s the way you want it, I will live with it.”
“So we’re agreed that after tonight, we go back to the way things were?”
“You’ll be annoyed and agitated with me, and I’ll provoke you whenever possible.”
A cheerful smile lit up her face. “Is that what you do? Provoke me?”
He tried to keep from laughing, but failed. “Absolutely.”
They both fell into a fit of laughter which somehow led to kissing. The kissing was about to lead to more, but there was a knock on the door. They pulled apart quickly.
“That’ll be the food.”
With reluctance, she stood up, giving him a quick backward glance. While she grabbed the food, he got himself under control. His dick was hard again, and he badly wanted to finish what they had almost just started.
He needed to get control.
A few deep breaths and thoughts of baseball stats had him back to normal by the time she was back with the food.
“Bed or table?”
They both looked to the table where her room service tray was still sitting. “The bed is good,” he said, grabbing a bag and helping her.
“I’m not always this messy,” she explained as they sat down on the bed. “When I travel, I just sort of don’t give a shit.”
“I was a little surprised. I’ve never seen a hair out of place on your head or your clothes in disarray. I assumed you were meticulous in everything.”
“I am,” she said as she pulled a covered container out of the bag. “At all times, except in hotels. It’s the one time I let myself just not give a fuck. There’s someone here to clean up after me, and I take advantage of that.”
“And I’m guessing you leave a large tip.”
“Why would you say that?” She inclined her head at him.
“Because you’re the kind of person who might want to relax, but you also know someone else is doing the work. You would never let that go unrewarded.” He’d watched her enough to come to a lot of conclusions.
“Well, you’re right. I do leave a tip.” She passed him a plastic paste. “I can’t believe you got all that when you barely know me.”
He might not have had face-to-face contact with her for all these years, but he’d watched her plenty. “I pay attention.”
They dug into the food, and she held up her fork after a few bites. “You know, I pay attention too. For instance, I know you have never been seen with a woman.”
“I don’t go out that much, and if I do, it’s with the guys or other friends.” He continued to eat, wondering if she’d keep going.
“Is there a woman or multiple women you just have on call when you need them?”
He practically choked on his pasta. “Holy fuck.” He spit out the bite that was in his mouth. “I can”t believe you just asked me that.”
She shrugged. “We’re friends, right? I was asking a normal friend question.”
He set his plate down. “What is it you are asking me?” He knew what she wanted to know, but he wanted to hear her say it.
“Fine, you want me to be blunt. If you don’t go out and aren’t seen photographed with women, how do you get sex?” Her voice was pretty calm, but he heard just a hint of what he was hoping was jealousy.
“I could ask you the same.” He wasn’t going to break easily. He wanted her to squirm.
She huffed out a breath. “I have fuck buddies. Guys I know who don’t want anything more than a few nights or weeks of fun. They know the score going in, and it works. Are you happy?”
Not really. He wanted to murder every single one of them. Realistically, he knew she’d had sex and probably a lot because she was so confident and sexual. That didn”t make it any easier to hear. “Maybe I have the same.”
“Do you?” Her eyebrows raised.
He’d love to keep playing this game, but he was hungry and needed to eat. Picking up his plate again, he said, “No, not really. I’m not a monk, but I generally only have sex a few times a year. When I meet someone nice, I make sure they know it’s just that one night, and that”s it. In fact, it’s been over six months since the last time.”
“There’s never been anyone you wanted to be more with? Who made you want to settle down?”
Her inquisitiveness on this subject was fascinating. There was someone he wanted more with. It was her. But he knew without a doubt that he’d never see her again if he said that. He had to take this slow and play it right.
She had to come to him.
“Not really.” Not a lie but not the truth either. “Seems we”re two peas in the same pod.”
She looked at him silently before taking a bite of her food. “I guess so,” she said around a mouthful of pasta.
He smiled inwardly and kept eating. She hated that they were alike for some reason, and he hoped like hell he was the reason.
By the time they finished eating, he was beyond exhausted. But there was no way he was leaving when she wasn’t pushing him out the door. Somehow he’d find the energy for sex again. Really as soon as she touched him, he’d probably be raring to go.
That’s when he heard her sigh and stretch her back. It was evident that she was also exhausted. He needed to do the right thing.
“I should go.”
“No,” she said quickly. “You don’t have to.”
“We’re both tired and need sleep.”
She looked around the room, for what he had no idea. “I am tired, and I can see in your eyes that you are too, but I....I’m not ready for the night to end.”
He knew how much that confession cost her. “I’m not either.” He walked to her, taking her in his arms. She hugged him back, laying her head on his chest.
“Stay,” she said so quietly that he barely heard her.
It seemed like he was staying.
He tipped her face up, kissing her gently at first, but soon it turned into more. Their hands roamed each other’s bodies until they were both naked and on the bed. They kissed for long minutes, which turned into even longer minutes, but it never led to more.
Sex seemed to become an afterthought, and they fell asleep entwined together, neither of them saying a word.
It was the perfect end to their night together.