Chapter 42
Rosie
Alex's words echo in my ears, making my heart tremble. I can't believe what I've just heard. This stubborn, annoying, incredibly sexy and sweet cowboy... he's just laid his heart bare before me. And I? I'm simply stunned, disbelieving, yet suffused with a happiness I never thought possible.
His hands on my face are warm, reassuring. His eyes, so sincere and full of love... I'm not sure I even deserve it, damn it! This thought makes me feel dizzy.
I mentally retrace the last few days, after the camping trip, after that magical night under the stars. I've behaved horribly toward him, I know that. Fear paralyzed me, pushing me to shut myself away like a hedgehog. That evening at the Rusty Spur, when he asked me to dance with that irresistible smile of his, I felt panic overwhelm me. I asked him for time, stammering an excuse, and then I began avoiding him like a coward.
And him? He's been simply wonderful, far more than I deserved. He's given me all the space I needed, without questions, without pressure. Even now, looking into his eyes, I can see how much my behavior must have hurt him. The guilt twists in my stomach.
He told me he'd follow me to Los Angeles if necessary. Los Angeles! Him, who loves this ranch more than anything in the world. Him, who would suffer in a big city like a bird in a cage. Yet he was willing to do it. For me. This thought takes my breath away.
And this awareness, this act of love so great and selfless, has given me the strength to open up, to confide in him my true thoughts. To admit that I want to stay here, with him.
"Alex," I whisper, my voice trembling with emotion, "I don't know what to say. You're... you're incredible."
Okay... well, very eloquent, Rosie, well done! Now Alex will really know how you feel. My inner voice scolds me, making me realize I'm not doing a very good job.
His words continue to echo in my mind like a sweet melody. You can trust me completely, Rosie. You can entrust me with your heart, your dreams, your fears. And damn it, I want to. I want to trust him with every fiber of my being, even though the idea terrifies me.
I take a deep breath, trying to find the right words to express the whirlwind of emotions I feel inside. "I've never been good at relationships. I've always kept people at a distance, out of fear of suffering, out of fear of losing myself. I've never had a real relationship. But you... you've torn down every one of my defenses. You've barged into my life like a hurricane, upending every certainty I had. And this terrifies me and exhilarates me at the same time..." I start to panic. Oh god, I'm so bad at this.
"Shhh" Alex saves me, silencing me.
Alex pulls me into his embrace, and I let myself melt into it, finally feeling safe. His scent, a mix of leather, pine, and something uniquely Alex, envelops me, calming my nerves.
Suddenly, I feel his arms tighten around me even more. I look up at him, and before I can say anything, his lips are on mine. The kiss is sweet and passionate at the same time, charged with all the emotions we've held back these past few days. I lose myself in that kiss, feeling my heart race and the world around us disappear.
When he finally pulls away after what feels like an eternity, I'm slightly dazed but also more at peace.
But before I can catch my breath, I see that familiar, cocky smile spread across his lips.
Oh no, I know that look.
"Princess..." he says, his tone a mix of amusement and tenderness, "you said you're not good at relationships. Does that mean we have one?"
The question catches me off guard. I feel the heat rise to my cheeks as I realize what I've said. The words came out without thinking... I didn't mean to say too much, to go too far. But now that I think about it, it's exactly what I want.
For a moment, I feel the familiar panic start to grow within me. Is it too soon? Am I moving too fast? But then I look at Alex, see his smile, his eyes full of hope and love. I remember his words, his offer to follow me to Los Angeles if necessary.
I take a deep breath, trying to calm the frantic beating of my heart. "I... I suppose so," I finally respond, my voice a bit uncertain but with a smile starting to form on my lips. "I mean, if that's what you want too."
Alex's smile widens even more, if possible.
"If that's what I want?" He repeats, shaking his head slightly as if he can't believe my question. "Princess, it's all I've wanted since the moment I laid eyes on you."
His words fill me with a joy I never thought possible. I laugh lightly, feeling suddenly lighthearted.
"Well, then I guess we officially have a relationship, cowboy," I say, leaning in slightly to give him a quick kiss on the lips.