Chapter 21
Lawson
Oakley’s lips blaze a path across my skin, his stubble scorching with the way it heats my flesh. He makes good on his word, kissing across my chest, his mouth softly scraping as it trails up my arms in turn, kisses laid against my elbows.
He’s everywhere. In my field of vision, in my head, his touch on my skin, his scent in my nose, the sounds of his satisfaction filling my ears.
It’s overwhelming in the best possible way, and a near-frantic alarm takes up residence in my chest, so sudden I’m left lightheaded. I don’t want this to end.
I don’t want this ever to end.
Oakley’s mouth travels back down my arm, the man clearly taking his time and enjoying it. I don’t mind that one bit. I love every single thing he’s doing to me. But I’m also desperate to feel those lips on my neck again. On my cock.
“Oak,” I groan, tilting my head to the side, hoping he gets the hint.
He chuckles hoarsely, his lips traveling along my shoulder inward. They stop, hovering near my neck, so close but not close enough. “Here?”
“Do I needa draw you a map? Yes, there.”
His laughter ghosts over my skin, and then his lips follow, prickling pain and pleasure a single entity as he presses a kiss to my neck. His fingers in my hair tug my head further aside, stubble rough, tongue smooth as he lays waste to the last of my brain cells.
“Fuck, princess. I could torture you like this for hours.”
“Not torture,” I manage, his fingers skipping featherlight down my cock.
His huff is small. “Only you would think edging is a damn walk in the park.”
“Edging?”
He hums an “Mhm,” his mouth leaving small kisses down the column of my throat. “When you prolong the period before an orgasm, making arousal last as long as possible before, finally, you or your partner allows your climax to take you over.”
My brain whirs. “I don’t see how that’s a bad thing.”
His laugh is louder this time. “It’s not. Some people just don’t have the patience for that kinda thing.”
“Well…” My words cut off when Oakley’s fingers wrap around my cock, the man tugging slowly as his lips press to my Adam’s apple. It takes me a moment to find my voice. “I like this part best. Orgasms come and go so quickly. But this…this feels better than getting off for the heck of it.”
Oakley’s head comes up, his eyes meeting mine, the marbling of his irises taken over by so much pupil. There’s a seriousness in his gaze at odds with the toying of his fingers on my cock. “It should. You deserve to feel good, Law.”
“You make me feel real good. Always do.”
He swallows, his eyes pinging between my own. “In that case, spread your legs for me, princess. I know another good place to torture.”
I let out a soft laugh, widening my legs and hitching up my knees.
Oakley leans down again, his lips traveling across my torso like a paintbrush.
They bypass my dick, his breath ghosting lower before there’s pressure against my balls.
Air puffs from my lungs, Oakley’s tongue a tease more than anything, the tip of it swiping against my sac and making my toes curl.
“Don’t move,” he murmurs.
“Where would I go?” I counter, giving the rope binding me to the headboard a purposeful tug.
Oakley’s smile is wicked as he pops off the bed, his hair falling over his forehead in a messy wave. He grabs supplies from his nightstand, returning in almost no time at all. Wet fingers drag over my hole once he’s resituated, and a sigh escapes my lungs.
“I love how much you love this,” he says, rubbing against me, not yet pressing inside.
“I’m guessing that makes me a bottom?” I ask, having been wondering about that.
He hums, sliding one finger inside of me, constant upward pressure making my hips tilt further off the bed. Ah, fuck. “Does the idea of fucking a man appeal to you?”
“Not as much as this,” I admit.
I nearly jolt when Oakley’s tongue runs a path up my cock.
“You only need to pick a label if you want one, Law. Top, bottom, side, vers—they’re just words, and preferences can change.
I think respect and communication in the bedroom is more important than a term that may mean something different to each person who uses it. ”
The fact that Oakley has two fingers inside of me now, stroking rhythmically, makes it hard to focus on what he’s saying. “And you? This works for you?”
Oakley’s eyes meet mine as his tongue flicks across the top of my dick. “I do prefer to top, so yes, this works for me real well. But if you ever want to try having me sink down over your cock, I’d be happy to oblige, princess.”
Fuck.
“What, uh…what’s a side?”
Oakley’s chuckle curves his lips into a smile, the man looking damn happy as he slides three fingers into my ass. The stretch has my neck arching back for only a moment, my eyes returning to Oakley as soon as I can manage it. “Someone who prefers sex without penetration.”
“Ah,” I rasp, the thickness of Oakley’s fingers making me ache for the man’s cock. “Oak.”
“Getting desperate?” he asks, his tone both playful and smug.
“You telling me you’re not ready to have my ass clamping down around your dick? You haven’t even touched it.”
The man grunts, heat blazing in his eyes as he slips his fingers free. He leans over my stomach, tongue swiping along my abdomen, right below my cock. “Told you I’d get you leaking.”
“Mission accomplished, cowboy. Now suit up and put that horse to stable.”
“Jesus,” he mutters, a laugh in his tone as he grabs a condom. He gives his cock a slow stroke as I watch. “I think I’ll take it as a compliment that you’re calling my dick a stallion.”
“Take it as you’d like. Just fucking ram him home already.”
“Good God,” Oakley says, grinning now as he rolls the condom on. “Isn’t this supposed to be my penance for roping you earlier? ’Cause I can’t say I’m upset about any of it.”
“Told you you wouldn’t be,” I point out. “And you know I’m not actually mad about that, right?”
“I do,” he says, easing forward, one hand on his dick as he notches against me. He pushes in ever so slowly, even though I can tell he’s hanging on by a thread himself. “You just enjoy giving me shit for the heck of it. Always have.”
“That’s not true.”
“It is,” he says, pressing further forward, his cock opening me up the same way his fingers did.
I focus on the feel of it, the fullness a unique sort of pleasure that makes my mind blank and every inch of my body tingle, as if enveloped by a comforting haze.
Oakley goes on, his voice husky as he sinks deeper.
“You like… toying with me because I’m the one person in your life you don’t have to be responsible around.
You can let loose, and you know I’ll never judge you.
I’ll never… think less of you for finding joy in the littlest things. ”
My breath catches, his words throwing me temporarily off-kilter, despite me knowing it to be true. All of it. “Because I trust you,” I tell him needlessly.
Oakley swallows hard, his hand on my thigh, his hips pressed flush against my ass now. “I know you do.”
“So you can’t leave me again.”
His face falls in an instant, the sorrow in his eyes making me wish I could take the words back. But I’ve never been good at filtering myself around Oakley. The one time I tried, he went and left Montana. Left me.
I can’t let that happen again.
“God, Law,” the man murmurs, tucking my leg around his hip before closing the distance between us, his weight pressing me down against the bed. “I’m so fucking sorry for that.”
“I know you are.”
“And I’m not leaving again,” he says, his eyes imploring me to believe him. “I didn’t realize this was still weighing on you.”
I don’t have a thing to say in response, knowing it shouldn’t still be. The man is back. I believe him when he says he’s not going again.
But the years I spent without Oakley were arguably the worst of my life. The thought of losing him a second time is terrifying. I’m not sure how I’d cope.
“God,” Oakley mutters again, his head falling beside my own as he tucks himself firmly over me. His hands slide up the outsides of my raised arms, Oakley’s elbows on the bed to either side of my head. “I’m sorry.” The words are accompanied by a slow roll of his hips. “I’m sorry, princess.”
“Don’t,” I manage, my voice coming out hoarse. “Don’t fuck me like an apology, Oak. You already did your sorries. I don’t want this to be…to be that.”
He puffs out a breath, turning to press his lips to my jaw. “You’re right.”
“I know I am.”
He snaps his hips a little harder, the glide of his cock making my back arch. “This better, princess?”
“Mhm.”
Oakley burrows his face into my neck as he starts fucking me in earnest. There’s an urgency in the way he’s coiled around me. A pleading in every rut and touch, although for what I can’t figure out.
I’m too quickly lost to the euphoria, the passing of time ceasing to exist, no troubles able to touch me while I’m suspended here.
One of Oakley’s hands glides up and down my arm, each fingertip trailing electricity, his mouth finding spots on my neck to abrade.
Down to my clavicle. Near my armpit. My ear, Oakley’s chuckle when I groan like a pleasant sort of static in my head.
“You’re gone, aren’t you?” he murmurs, his voice whisper-soft, although everything sounds a little fuzzy.
“’S’good, Oak.”
“I know, princess. I don’t wanna touch your cock yet. I’m not done torturing you.”
I open my mouth to respond, but Oakley beats me to it.
“I know, not torture. I’m not done worshiping you. Enjoying every piece of you.”
My heart kicks. “However long you want.”
His groan is pained. “I wish you could hear the words you say.”
I try to run back through them now, but Oakley plants a hand under my ass and lifts at the same time as he punches inside of me. My breath stutters out as he ruthlessly pegs me again and again.
“F-fuck,” I groan, my cock bucking, all that haziness I was floating in coalescing into a sharp point. “Too…ah, too good.”
“Is that possible?” he asks, his words breathy.
“Need…”
“A little longer,” he says, slowing right back down, the shallow roll of his hips having me panting. I can feel every inch of him, every slide into me, the thickness of his cock keeping me open and the man himself a blanket of sensation I want to curl up in.
I know he’s trying to draw this out, but I’m so close. So close, and every minute shift of his body against mine, inside of mine, has me creeping ever closer to that edge.
I don’t want to trip. I want to fucking fly.
“Oak,” I husk out, turning my head to catch his gaze.
Blue and brown stares back at me, the man’s cheeks and forehead flushed, his mouth slick and parted, so close I could catch his lips with my own if I wanted.
A kiss. A token. It wouldn’t mean the same thing now as it did when we were eleven.
I force my voice to work. “Make me come for you, Oakley.”
Gaze never leaving my own, Oakley picks up his pace, wraps his hand around my cock, and strokes.
My orgasm hits me like the summer sun blasting out from around a cloud.
When the sky is dreary and the air feels cold, but your face is still turned toward the sky, waiting, waiting.
And then there it is, a wave of heat, a swelling in your chest and a lightness of your very being.
It’s bliss. A world dark having gone light.
It’s fleeting, you know it is, but you savor every single second of it for as long as you can.
Prickles run along the corner of my mouth, soft lips brushing featherlight against my skin. Oakley’s lips. His exhalation is stuttered, an excruciating ecstasy I understand, his hips jolting against me as he comes undone. His mouth is right there. Right there. And God, I just want…
But Oakley turns his head before I can finish my thought, his face tucked against my neck, his breaths sawing out, one hand still clutching my arm. My heart beats erratically. I don’t want the clouds to return yet. I want to bask in Oakley’s sunlight.
Which is why, when the man says, “Stay tonight,” I have only one response.
“Yeah.”
Oakley draws back, his gaze snagging on my mouth for a prolonged moment before he pushes up onto his hands. He slips from my body, discarding the condom and making quick work of untying my arms. He lowers them back to my sides slowly, rubbing each as if to help the flow of blood return.
“All right?” he checks.
“Fine.”
Oakley wipes me down with the corner of the sheet before falling next to me on the bed, too tired maybe to bother with anything more. I don’t mind. I scoot up the mattress with my pillow, finding Oakley watching me, expression serious.
“It’s not weird,” I assure him, wondering if that’s what he’s concerned about. He did ask the other day if talking about sex with him was odd. None of it is. “Does it feel weird to you?”
“No,” he answers quickly. “That’s not what I was thinking.”
I wait, but he doesn’t volunteer more. “Would you get over here then? I’m getting cold.”
With a huff and a twitch of a smile, Oakley scoots closer.
He wraps his arm around my chest, bristling the side of my shoulder almost aggressively with his lips before I reach over and swat him.
His sigh sounds happy, his hand wandering down to my forearm before stilling.
He brushes a fingertip along the scar I got there when I was sixteen.
“I remember when this happened,” he says, tracing the crescent shape slowly.
“I should hope so. You were there.”
Oakley hums. “I’ve seen that old ass wandering around the ranch a couple times. The Darling Donkey. Why is that?”
I chuckle. “Jackson could tell you the story better than I could. The donkey helped him find Ash when he went missing.”
“Ash was missing? Shit.”
“More like stuck. In the woods. Jackson’s been giving the donkey treats ever since as a thank-you.”
Oakley snorts, his finger continuing to run along my forearm, over the bite mark. “I still haven’t forgiven him.”
“It’s a donkey, Oak. Let it go.”
“A donkey who bit you for no good reason,” he says hotly.
My chest warms at the consternation on Oakley’s face. “At least I had you there to run him off, didn’t I? My protector.”
Oakley goes motionless for just a second before his hand slides up to my chest, his fingers and palm skimming lightly over my skin. “I don’t like seeing you hurt. Not then. Not now.”
“I know,” I say softly, feeling the same. Of course I do.
His hand splays over my heart, voice solemn. “I’m not leaving again, Law. I need you to know that. To trust in it.”
My pulse skitters. Oakley follows my draw when I pull him close, curling around me, my protector still, chasing away the clouds whether or not he realizes it. “I know, Oak. Because I won’t let you go.”