Chapter 18
LAUREN
O n the menu that evening was pan seared trout and haricot vert, which was a fancy name for green beans. Normally, I would vigorously enjoy my food, but with Freddy sitting next to me, everything lost its flavor.
“This fish isn’t fresh,” he said sourly after taking a tiny bite.
“Kyra said it was caught locally today,” I said. “I don’t think they froze and defrosted it that quickly, do you?”
Freddy shrugged one shoulder. “She lied.”
In the past, I would have tried to placate him to avoid him being condescending to our server, but I wasn’t going to baby Freddy anymore.
“And you’re insufferable. Can we please talk about our settlement now?
” Freddy had pushed off this discussion all day long, insisting that we take a trail ride together so we could relax before getting down to business.
I had to hide my amusement when Walt put him on Alma.
Taking off on my new mount, a glossy brown quarter horse named Banjo, and leaving Freddy in the dust was a priceless moment.
He took a sip of his wine, the only part of the meal he hadn’t found a reason to criticize yet. “I know you’d like me to leave, and I’m happy to fly home tomorrow. You know what I want, and you have the power to give it to me.”
“Believe me when I say that I’d love for you to leave immediately.” I steadied my voice to take the waver out of it. “But you’re not getting Ms. Match. I’ve made a very generous offer that I suggest you take because even a sliver of our company will never belong to you.”
He blotted his mouth with his napkin. “You’re being spiteful. You have plenty of money for your retirement. Don’t you think I should, too? Having a piece of the company guarantees me a certain amount of security.”
Giving him my hard-earned money was going to be a difficult pill to swallow, but giving him a piece of the company I’d built with my sister? Never.
I clenched my fists together under the table.
“If you can’t save some of the fortune I’ll be paying you in alimony, that’s on you, Freddy.
Learn to live like a normal person, and you’ll be fine.
I accept that I was the working spouse in our marriage, and you’re owed a certain amount, but you’ve never been a part of the company and you never will. ”
“I wasn’t a part of it? Then why was I on your television show? Explain that to me.”
“You were on three, maybe four, times in five years.” I had to work hard not to snarl at him. “And, may I remind you, you were paid for those appearances.”
Kyra came by our table to refill our water glasses, and we immediately stopped bickering and pasted fake smiles on our faces. We’d been playing this sick game for a long time.
“Let me know if you need anything,” she said brightly, oblivious to what she’d walked into.
“Thank you.” I was so tired of faking this marriage. So tired of pretending to be happy when I felt miserable inside.
Freddy’s cell phone buzzed on the table. He picked it up before I could see the name on the screen, but I presumed it was his lawyer calling to find out if he’d worked me over yet.
“Hello? Hello? I can’t hear you.” He lowered the phone from his ear and glared at me. “The reception here is shit.”
I smiled sweetly. “Try walking around the ranch. That’s what I do.”
To my relief, he left the table to take his call.
Matthew and I were the only people left in the dining room, and both of us were sitting alone.
As soon as Freddy was out the door, Matthew strode over and took the seat next to mine.
My heart rate revved up at the sight of him in his chambray button down and gray chinos.
The phrase “he cleans up nicely” now made perfect sense to me, although, to my surprise, I found I liked him just as well in his work clothing.
Give me Matthew Hart with a summer tan, half-day of beard growth, faded t-shirt, cowboy boots and dusty jeans, and that was my idea of heaven on earth.
“Are you doing alright?” he asked quietly.
How could I answer that question? I was seriously not alright, but it wasn’t in my nature to show weakness.
Besides, I felt better with Matthew sitting next to me.
He had a calming effect on my nervous system, even if he had suggested at breakfast that our relationship was now downgraded to friendship status.
“I’m as okay as I can be, under current circumstances.”
Matthew nodded and looked down at the table. When he lifted his head and met my gaze again, his eyes told me I hadn’t fooled him one bit.
“You don’t have to pretend with me, Lauren. I know why you came out to the ranch. Maybe I shouldn’t have done it, but I looked online and saw what happened to you in New York.”
“No, it’s totally fine you did.” Relief flooded through me.
No more secrets from Matthew. That was a good thing.
“I’m so sorry I couldn’t tell you everything sooner.
I didn’t want to get you involved in my mess, and I was afraid that if people here found out who I really was, they’d sell photos to the media. ”
“I hope you know I would never do that,” he said. “In fact, I think everyone here at the ranch would protect you. I can at least vouch for my staff.”
A lump formed in my throat, so I swallowed hard and nodded at him, trying to keep myself together. “Thank you.”
“You don’t have to talk about it any more if you don’t want to, but I’m here if you need me. Okay?” He put his hand over mine. “I’ve got your back.”
I still didn’t trust myself to speak because the tears were too close to the surface.
It had been so long since a man, besides my brother, had offered me that kind of support.
At a loss for words, I nodded and turned my hand over so I could interlace my fingers with his.
Maybe I shouldn’t have done it, but friends could hold hands, right?
“I think I upset you this morning,” he said, giving my hand a gentle squeeze. “I wanted you to know that there’s no pressure from me. I’m happy to be your friend if that’s all you can offer right now. Of course, I liked the direction things were headed before your…”
“Soon to be ex-husband,” I supplied.
“Yeah, him,” he said grimly. “Before he got here. I understand if you need to dial it back, though.”
I knew Tori wouldn’t advise me to put all my cards on the table so early in a relationship, but for once in my life, I wasn’t going to play it safe.
“I don’t want to dial it back,” I said earnestly. “I want to enjoy every minute I have here with you. I’m hoping Freddy and I can settle things tonight so you and I can pick up where we left off. I totally understand if you want to steer clear of me, though. My situation is really messy, and?—”
“I’d love to pick up right where we left off,” he said. “I think we were mid-kiss.”
His blue eyes melted me into a puddle. “You make me feel like a teenager again, Matthew. I’ve got butterflies.” My smile faded as Freddy re-entered the dining room. “Shit. He’s back.”
Matthew slid his hand from mine. “Can I come by your room later tonight? Maybe we could go for a walk under the stars.”
“Yes.” Before I could say anything more, Freddy was taking his seat and Matthew was standing to leave.
“You might want to go check on your daughter,” Freddy told him. “I just saw her poking at a snake with a stick.”
“Don’t worry,” Matthew said calmly. “She knows the difference between a garter snake and a rattlesnake. She identified you correctly.”
I tried unsuccessfully not to laugh as he walked away. “C’mon, Freddy. You have to admit you walked into that one.”
“That man is incompetent and…and…”—he leaned closer to me, the fermented smell of wine on his breath—“I’m going to write a review of this place that lets everyone know how he runs his business, from the terrible WiFi to that geriatric horse I rode today.
I can make sure everyone knows his ranch is a disgrace. ”
Panic tore through me. Freddy had connections in the world, and he could actually hurt Matthew’s business if that’s where he put his energy.
“Stop it, Freddy.” I donned my ice queen mask. “You’re acting like a child.”
“I’m writing a review right now.” With a flourish, he extracted his phone and tapped on the screen. Then he frowned and shoved it back in his pocket. “As soon as I have decent WiFi.”
I had to act quickly and decisively. Balling my hands into fists at my sides, I tried to channel my much more confrontational twin sister.
“If you do anything to hurt Matthew, I will force you to sell En Vedette in the divorce. Don’t push me, or you’ll find out that I can be just as vindictive as you can, and you’ll have to wave goodbye to your beloved boat. ”
En Vedette, his racing yacht, was owned in both his name and mine, since I was the one who financed her purchase and paid the insurance.
This was a trump card I’d been holding onto since our separation.
Now was the time to pull it out and play it because I wasn’t going to let him destroy Matthew’s life.
He’d already done enough damage to mine.
Sensing that he’d gone too far, Freddy’s determination faltered. “Calm down. I haven’t done anything yet.”
I made my voice firm, using the tone I took with my sons when they were naughty little boys. “Go home. Sign the divorce papers, and we’ll be done with this chapter of our lives. You want to end this as much as I do.”
For a brief moment, I thought he was going to capitulate, but then his face hardened.
“I’ll leave the ranch, but I’m not signing anything until you agree to give me a piece of Ms. Match.
You have a week to think it over, and then I go to the press with our story.
I’ll tell them how we faked this marriage for years because you were afraid of a divorce hurting your company.
Or maybe it was really your personal reputation that you wanted to preserve? ”