6. CODY
By the time we pulled up to the hospital, my stomach was churning.
I couldn’t pinpoint a logical reason why I was so nervous.
I’d never met Danielle before, but that wasn’t the cause.
Just as Alex was parking, it dawned on me that my nerves probably stemmed from the fact that I hadn’t spent this much time with a girl since Riley died, let alone lived with and cared for one.
Losing Riley had nearly destroyed me. She was perfect.
We met during our freshman year of high school, and she accepted me as the damaged orphan I thought I was back then.
But she saw beyond that; she saw me. I certainly didn’t make it easy for her.
Looking back, I’m sure there were plenty of times I would have walked away if I were in her shoes.
Yet she stayed, took her time, and changed me.
When I was with her, I wanted to be a better person.
When I got the letter telling me she was gone, it felt as if life lost all meaning.
I had joined the Army to build a better future for us, and because I wasn’t there, she died. Deep down, I knew she’d want me to move on, find happiness, and discover a new purpose. But I refused to accept that. I didn’t think I deserved it. If I had been there, she would still be here.
Even if I wanted to move forward, every woman I knew seemed ridiculous.
Most of them were just uniform chasers, and none of them came close to being like her.
Riley wasn’t simply smart; she was an intellectual.
She was also one of the most fun people I've ever met. One moment we’d be deep in a discussion about the meaning of life, and the next we’d be engaged in a food fight while making dinner.
I missed her deeply and always felt no one could ever replace her.
The illogical part of me felt guilty for agreeing to look after Danielle.
Riley had been gone for years now, but the idea of living under the same roof as Danielle still felt like cheating.
On the other hand, the logical side saw it as a step forward toward moving on.
Keeping Danielle safe gave me a reason to keep going in life, something I hadn’t been able to do for Riley.
To me, this was a chance to redeem myself.
“Dude, you ready? Help me grab the food.” Alex grabbed one bag and motioned toward another in the backseat. I reached back, grabbed the bag, and got out of the car.
“She’s not going to bite my head off, is she?” I shot Alex a look and asked, half-laughing, even though I already knew there was a good chance she would.
Alex laughed way more than he should have. I was serious. “She won’t be that bad, Cody. You have her food in your hand. If she starts to get an attitude, just start eating it in front of her.”
I was as ready as I could be to meet someone who probably already hated me.
I couldn’t imagine anything worse than being kidnapped into isolation by your brother’s roommate, someone you’d never even met.
In fact, if I were in her shoes, I’d definitely already hate me.
I assumed this would take every bit of patience I could muster.
We reached Danielle’s room, and Alex knocked on the open door as he stepped inside. I followed, treading lightly with hesitation, bracing myself to see Alex’s fragile, broken sister. But nothing could have prepared me for what I saw and how I felt in that moment.
Instead, Danielle sat on her bed, bruised and beaten, yet somehow still exuding strength. She was playing cards while watching something on the TV that I couldn’t quite make out. She looked exactly how I had spent years feeling on the inside. Maybe we had more in common than I thought.
“Hey, bro.” Danielle didn’t even look up from her game of Solitaire. She made no effort to acknowledge me, and frankly, I expected nothing less than pure hatred.
“Someone brought you food!” Alex used a fake, overly cheerful voice that I assumed was his lame attempt to cut through the Ice Queen’s tension. So far, it wasn’t working.
“So?” Danielle still wouldn’t look up.
“Are you just going to stand there, or are you going to introduce yourself?” Alex kept nodding toward me.
“Sorry.” I took a step forward and held out my hand. “I’m Cody. It’s nice to finally meet you.”
As I moved closer to her, I could see just how bad off she really was.
I didn’t know exactly what I expected, but I tried hard to keep my face neutral, especially since she seemed to be in a good mood.
Seemed to be. Danielle barely glanced my way before turning to scowl at Alex, and just like that, the good mood was gone.
“Is this really necessary, Alex?” she asked. She didn’t bother hiding the edge in her voice, either.
This is going to be worse than I thought.
Alex was right. She was a stubborn one.
“Fuck’s sake, Danielle. Can’t you just say hi?” Alex was quick to snap back at her. It appeared as if they’d had similar conversations before.
All I wanted was to leave. There was no way any amount of money was going to be worth bearing the brunt of her anger. Instead of backing down, I blurted out the most sarcastic and, without a doubt, the dumbest thing that could have come from my mouth.
“You know, it’s not like this is some goddamn vacation for me either.”
Alex immediately burst out laughing, but my face was already burning. I could feel the shade of bright red on my face. Considering all this girl had been through, the instant the words came out, I regretted what I said. For a moment, I felt like a complete moron.
“Danielle, I—”
“Well, at least you have a backbone.” She held out her hand with a sigh, as if it physically pained her to introduce herself. “I’m Danielle.”
Alex finally stopped laughing. “See, Cody, I told you she was just a stubborn ass with two broken legs.”
“I’m a what?!” Danielle’s head snapped toward Alex. She had a fierce look in her eyes that I couldn’t stop staring at. Honestly, I’d sooner go through basic training again than take that look being shot in my direction any day.
“Oh, lighten up. Your legs broke, not your sense of humor.” Alex was doing his best to ease the tension in the room. “Besides, you have to be nice to Cody. He brought you dinner, didn’t you, Cody?”
He nodded toward the bag in my hand. I looked down at it, then back at Danielle with a smile. Judging by the way her face lit up when she saw the bag, I realized I should have started by mentioning the food.
Danielle had a beautiful smile; even beneath all the scars, there was something infectious about it. I soaked it in for a second, as I imagined that’d probably be the last time I saw it for a good while.
“Oh, uh, yeah. No solid food yet, though. Sorry. But we did get you some mashed potatoes with gravy.” I pulled a quart-sized container from the bag and handed it to her.
“Thank you.” Danielle looked me right in the eyes and smiled. For some reason I couldn’t explain, I had to force myself to keep my composure, and I wasn’t sure I liked it.
Just do your job and get your paycheck, Cody. Stop staring at her damn smile.
Considering the attitude she had when we walked into the room, food or no food, she was suspiciously kind all of a sudden.
Before we got out of the car, I promised Alex I would never tell Danielle he would be paying me.
Paying me well, at that. He didn’t want her to feel like a burden or like I was some hired help.
The less she worried or hated the situation, the safer she would be.
Besides, Alex was just trying to help me out since I had to quit my job for this.
For him, I would have gladly done it for free. But I wasn’t about to tell him that.
“How did it feel to say thank you, she-devil?” Alex cut into my thoughts.
“Like rubbing lemon in every one of my cuts,” Danielle replied, though I couldn’t tell if she was joking or serious. It did seem like she was finally starting to lighten up, but then again, she did have food now.
We ate in silence long enough for it to become awkward for me, so I could only imagine Danielle felt the same.
I did my best to break the tension with some small talk.
After all, if I wanted the next few days, weeks, or, god forbid, months to be anything less than painfully awkward, I needed to get to know Danielle.
“So, Danielle, what are you watching?” I asked after swallowing a bite.
“Mysteries at the Museum. Not that I’d expect an empty Jarhead like you to know what that is,” she shot back, laced with sarcasm.
“For starters, Jarheads are Marines, and I’m not some god damn Marine. And second, I do know that show. It’s one of my favorites. You know the episode about Robert?”
Danielle looked like she wasn’t sure whether to answer, but I could tell she hadn’t expected me to know the show, and she certainly hadn’t expected me to stand my ground and go toe- to-toe with her. By now, curiosity was probably starting to crack through her cold exterior.
“Yeah? What about it?”
“I saw him in person once when we were on leave in Key West years ago. Remember that, Alex?”
Alex nodded, mouth full of food.
“Your brother and I went on a tour of Key West. We visited the U.S. Coast Guard Museum, Ernest Hemingway’s house, stood at the southernmost point of the United States, saw Robert, and even enjoyed a little chocolate-covered Key Lime Pie on a stick.
See… not a Jarhead. My head is quite full, thank you. ”
Looking at Danielle’s face, I couldn’t help but feel proud of myself. The smugness vanished, and it seemed she was starting to see me as more than just some brainless idiot friend of Alex’s. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t feel good to show her up.
“Well then, Cody,” Her cheeks flushed as she mumbled the words, refusing to look at me, “I guess we have more in common than I thought.”
I smiled at her, and got a half smile in return. It was an awkward moment that made me forget Alex was even in the room. It was dead silent, and I knew Alex was uncomfortable because he fumbled with his words as he started talking.
“Danielle has three days left here. I think we should come by every day during her rehab, Cody. That way, you can learn from the doctors what needs to be done to help her at home.”
“Yeah, of course,” I replied. “Alex, you look exhausted, and you’ve been here every single night. Why don’t you go home and get some rest? I’ll sleep in the chair tonight.”
Alex gave me a skeptical look, but finally gave in. “Actually, I could use some sleep that’s comfortable and in a real bed before my shift in the morning. Danielle, is that okay with you?”
“Anything that gets you off my back for a few hours is more than okay with me, brother dearest.”
“Well, okay then, rude. Both of you—call me if you need anything.” Alex grabbed his jacket and kissed Danielle on the top of her head.
“Danielle has rehab at 9:30 tomorrow morning. It’ll be a good chance for you to learn from the doctor.
I’ll be here with dinner after my shift. See you guys tomorrow.”
Alex left the room, and just like that, I was on my own to navigate the situation.
I looked at Danielle, and as quickly as Alex had left the room, so did the warm-tempered woman who had just begun to open up.
In her place was the indifferent shrew giving me a death stare that I already knew I never wanted to see again.
“Let’s get one thing straight.”
Sigh. Here we go.
Time to match wits. It would be the only way to survive.
“I don’t need a babysitter.”
“Nope.”
“I don’t need help.”
“Of course not.”
“And I don’t need someone to ‘keep me safe.’ I know how to play nice well enough to keep Alex off my back, and that’s all I intend to do.”
“You done yet?”
“Just stay out of my way, and I’ll stay out of yours.”
She rolled onto her side, facing away from me, and turned the TV volume up loud. I got the message loud and clear. No further responses from me would be necessary. Maybe the money would be a good enough incentive after all.
We didn’t say another word the rest of the night.
Danielle fell asleep shortly after our one-sided conversation, and I stayed awake a while longer, watching Mysteries at the Museum and trying to find a comfortable way to rest between two hospital chairs.
After a few hours of wondering what I had gotten myself into, I finally managed to fall asleep.
The Ice Queen had returned.