CHAPTER THREE
Back in the cafeteria now, Saint was watching as Marilisa and the others were speaking to the newcomers, including several men who seemed a bit older than himself. It was literally eating a hole inside of him.
“You fucked up, brother,” said Pax.
“I’m aware,” he growled.
“Are you? From where I’m sitting, you still don’t get it, Saint. She’s a grown woman, and you’re acting like an asshole. That woman put her life at risk to save all of our parents and grandparents. If you think I’m going to forget that or condemn her for that, you’re wrong.
“It was fucking brave as shit, and she handled herself beautifully. The fact that the man smiling at her right now is the one who saved her is what’s bothering you.”
“He doesn’t even know her,” he growled.
“I think he does,” said Pax. “I think he knows her better than you do, and that’s what’s eating you. He understands how her brain works. They have things in common, and you hate that.”
“What if I do?” he mumbled.
“Figure your shit out, Saint, or you won’t be of any good to anyone here. Worse? She’ll walk away. You’re the only reason that woman stays here, and now she’s staying here to take abuse from you. That will not last. She won’t stand for it, and friend or no, I fucking won’t stand for it either.”
Pax walked away, and he was pissed at his friend. Everyone was. The way Saint spoke to her was uncalled for and even his father was shooting daggers at him. He stood to leave and then noticed that Marilisa had left the grove as well. He walked toward the man who had saved her life and waited for him to stop speaking to someone.
“Hi. I’m Griffin,” he smiled, extending his hand. Saint took in a deep breath and shook the man’s hand.
“Saint. I wanted to thank you for saving Marilisa,” said Saint.
“Hey, it’s not a problem at all. I don’t think he was actually going to hurt her, but I didn’t want to see her harmed. It’s sort of what we do,” he grinned. Saint hated that the man was good-looking. In fact, it annoyed the shit out of him.
“Well, thanks.”
“Hey, Saint. It was just me saving the girl. Nothing else,” said Griffin.
Saint nodded and walked toward the long tree-lined drive. Veering left, he slowly walked through the maze of hedges, his mind racing a mile a minute.
That is until he heard soft crying. He stopped, listening for the direction, and finally made his way around the next corner, then the next, finding his way to the center where the large fountain was located.
“Damn,” he said beneath his breath. “Marilisa?”
“Go away, Saint,” she said, wiping her eyes. She stood to leave, and he reached out for her hand holding it securely in his own. “Let me go.”
“I don’t think I can,” he said softly. “I’ve been trying to and not having much luck.”
“I don’t know what to think about you anymore,” she cried. “You like me, you hate me…”
“I don’t hate you. I’ve never hated you. Ever. I’ve liked you from the moment you arrived as a young teenager. I just couldn’t seem to keep up with you growing into a woman.”
“Well, I did. It couldn’t be helped,” she said, raising her free hand and slapping it to her thigh. “I can’t keep wasting my time with you, Saint. I can’t. I see you, and my heart breaks more and more every damn day. I’ve asked Montana for a recommendation. I’m going to leave and work for the DOD.”
“No,” he said, shaking his head, pulling her closer to him.
“Yes. I can’t do this any longer. You’re killing me, and I can’t take more rejection, Saint. My parents tossed me aside, apparently, for an undisclosed amount of money. Friends tossed me aside because they thought I was strange. But you? You tossing me aside is not something I can handle.”
“Listen to me,” he said, pulling her toward the bench. He straddled the stone bench, forcing her to turn and face him. “I’m an idiot, asshole, and jerk.”
“Yep.”
“Okay,” he grinned. “But I’m scared, Marilisa. You are younger than me, but I’m realizing that you’re not too young for me. I was terrified when I knew that you had gone to the animal sanctuary. My heart was pounding so fast I couldn’t catch my breath. I never get that way. Never.”
“You don’t have to say that,” she said, wiping her tears from her cheeks. He reached up and, with the rough pad of his thumb, brushed a tear away.
“I’m saying it because I mean it. I don’t want to rush something so important. I come anywhere near you, and I struggle to breathe, I struggle to maintain common sense. I can’t think. I can’t eat. That kiss the night on your porch fucking threw me for a loop. I’ve never been kissed like that, Marilisa, and for a man my age, I shouldn’t be saying that.”
She looked at him with a frown and rolled her eyes.
“I’m serious. Never. I don’t want to know how you learned to kiss a man like that,” he scowled. “But I’d seriously like to be kissed like that again.”
“I can’t do this and let you break my heart again, Saint. My brain is big enough to fix just about everything, but it can’t fix my broken heart.”
He was such an ass. He was chastising himself for hurting her the way he had and praying to God that she would forgive him. He didn’t deserve another chance, but he was sure as hell hoping she’d give him one.
“I want to try. You and me. Let’s take the time to get used to one another. I want to know all about you. Your favorite foods, favorite color, favorite movie and music. And I’ll tell you mine. Just don’t leave.”
“I already know those things about you,” she said quietly. “You like navy blue. Your favorite foods are George’s fried chicken, Mama Irene’s gumbo, and your mother’s macaroni and cheese. You have two favorite movies. Apocalypse Now and The Godfather , the original. And when it comes to music you like anything except classical.”
He stared at her, wondering how she knew all that, how she had remembered all of that. He never told her those things. She’d observed him and tucked away all the things that were his favorites so she wouldn’t forget. She’d done that. For him.
She stood and pulled her hand from his.
“If you want to know those things about me, Saint, make the effort.” She walked away from him, winding through the maze and making her way back toward the others.
It was hours later that Saint realized he was still sitting on that damn bench, thinking about how badly he’d screwed things up between them. Now, he was faced with something he’d never had to do before.
Pursue the woman.