Chapter 30
CLARA
Iwas so tired of crying. First at the cabin, then in the SUV, Luke’s apartment, the airport, the plane, and finally now in my brother’s bathroom. I was going to need to rehydrate after this. By all rights, I should have looked like a shriveled-up prune left out in the sun too long.
The day had drained me both physically and emotionally. Calling my brother to pick me up at the airport had been difficult. He’d agreed to come get me, no questions asked, but Nic had wanted some answers on the drive back to Harrison City.
Through my tears, I had managed to give him the basic rundown of the deal Luke had offered me. Pretend to be his girlfriend so the people at work would think he was settling down, maturing. That he was someone stable they could trust running a whole show.
Weird request, yes, I had freely admitted that to Nic, but it seemed harmless enough. There was no clue that he was lying to me. It turned out the arrangement was about some kind of bet with his brother. The work thing had been a smokescreen.
That was all I had told Nic about the bet, since it was basically all I knew about it too.
Troy’s messages to Luke were pretty vague, but it sure seemed like he had tricked me into being his girlfriend just so he could have someone to bring home at Christmas.
Then he wouldn’t have to give up his fancy cabin.
Not to mention, he was planning on dumping me after Christmas.
From Luke’s timeline, it also seemed like he’d targeted me specifically. I had to assume it was because he thought of me as an easy mark. A pushover. A rube. There was nothing worse when someone made you feel like a fool and that was how Luke had made me feel.
No matter what the details of the situation were, one thing was indisputable: Luke had lied to me. Full stop. I couldn’t just ignore that.
He knew damn well my ex had spread lies about me in the movie industry back in LA. To be fair, no one liked being lied to, but I had made it clear to Luke how important honesty was to me in a relationship. I had been burned badly in the past.
Trust didn’t come easily anymore, and Luke’s deception wasn’t going to help with that.
At this rate, I would never trust another man again.
Luke had seemed so genuine. If he had been faking things the whole time, I hadn’t noticed anything.
Maybe I was just a terrible judge of character. That, or I had the worst taste in men.
The spinster basement at my parents’ house was looking better and better. No one could lie to me if I was single. No one could break my heart if I never let myself love anyone again.
Love was great, but the pain wasn’t worth it. My ex had shattered me. Luke had picked up all my jagged pieces, giving me hope, only to smash them into even smaller bits. I couldn’t do it again. I wouldn’t survive. I had nothing left to give.
Single women who kept chasing love had to be some of the strongest people in the world because I was only twenty-four and I was done with all of it. Keep your candlelight dinners, your smoldering smiles, and your broken promises. I’d be getting some shelter cats.
They could keep me company in my pit of despair. I could buy them outfits and dress them up for photoshoots. Then start an Instagram account and pretend they’re the ones running it.
I sighed and scrubbed my hand over my face. I was losing it. Maybe I should wait on the cats.
The cold bathroom tile made my butt ache. I didn’t know how long I had been in there, but I couldn’t avoid going back out into my brother’s house. I was sure he was still up waiting on me in case I wanted to talk.
With a groan, I got to my feet. My knees cracked and I shook my head, feeling like I was falling apart. Sleep called to me. I was exhausted and it would be a welcome escape from the hell of being awake.
I opened the restroom door with a loud creak. Nic’s heavy steps came lumbering down the hall toward me.
“Are you okay?” He shook his head. “Of course not. I mean, is there anything you need right now? Or anyone you want me to kill?”
I smiled softly and gave my brother a hug. “Thank you, but all I want right now is a soft pillow.”
“The guest bed is all yours,” Nic said. “Sadie is at her place tonight. You can snore as loud as you want.”
I shook my head and turned toward the guestroom. “Don’t wake me before noon.”
Nic chuckled. “You have my word.”
I slipped into the first sleeping clothes I could find in my disorganized suitcase. Folding my clothes neatly hadn’t been a priority back at Luke’s. I had just needed to get the hell out of there.
The bed in Nic’s guestroom was small, cold, and lonely. I curled in on myself and merciful slumber took me. If I had dreams, they were too dark to remember.
The next day, I woke up and stretched, and for about five seconds, everything felt right in the bright Texas sunshine. Then reality slammed down on me like an elephant sitting on my chest, and I wished I could fall right back to sleep to escape.
That wasn’t going to happen. Coffee scented the air. It was about the only thing that could have lured me out of that bed. With a sigh, I dragged my protesting limbs out the door and made my way to the kitchen.
Nic sat at his kitchen table with a steaming mug beside him and a newspaper spread out in front of him.
“Are you the last person who gets an actual paper?” I croaked. My voice sounded like I’d smoked two packs of cigarettes the night before. At least I wasn’t crying again. Not yet anyway.
“Call me old fashioned, but I just like having it in my hand, the smell of the paper and the ink. Plus I like the sudoku.”
“You’re already turning into Dad,” I said, slinking over to the coffeemaker.
“Don’t you dare say that.” Nic laughed.
I stuck a pod in the machine and started a cup brewing. “Pretty soon, you’ll be wearing black socks with sandals and you’ll take up bird watching.”
He frowned at me. “What’s wrong with looking at birds? That doesn’t make me Dad.”
I poured some sugar in my coffee and sat at the table with Nic. “Thanks again for picking me up last night.”
He nodded and sipped his coffee. “Anytime. Whatever you need, you know I’ll be there.”
“I know,” I said, choking back the sudden surge of emotion. “I know.”
“So, do you want to tell me what happened? No pressure.”
I sighed and pretended I was just blowing on my coffee. “It’s like I said last night.”
He spread his hands. “Last night you just said Luke had lied to you about a bet, but no one cries like that unless there’s more to it.”
“Well, yeah, there’s more to it. Luke asked me to be his fake girlfriend, and like an idiot, I fell in love with him.”
Nic leaned back and his eyes widened. “Love? That’s a big word. Are you sure?”
“I thought I was in love,” I said. “I was falling for him, for sure, at least. If it wasn’t love, that’s where it was heading fast.”
“Wow, that’s a lot to take in.”
“You’re not mad I was with your friend?”
Nic’s brow furrowed. “I’m not a huge fan of it, but no, you’re a grownup. What makes me angry is that he hurt you, however it ended up happening.”
“Thank you for being mature about this,” I murmured, sniffing back tears that wanted to sprout anew. “I’m sure I was just swept up in the magic of it all. You know I love Christmas.”
“When I talked to Luke last night, it kind of sounded like he got swept up in you, too.” My brother held up a hand. “I’m not defending him. Just telling you, he seemed almost as destroyed as you were.”
“I would love to believe that, but I don’t know. I just feel like a fool for going along with his weird deal. It was supposed to be purely professional, but—”
“Okay, okay, I don’t need details.” Nic shook his head and got up from the table. “Would you like some toast or something?”
“That would be awesome. But my point is, I should have never let things get personal.”
“It takes two to tango,” Nic said.
“I know, but I was the one who pushed things. And I’ll just leave it at that.”
“Thank you.” Nic chuckled and popped some bread in the toaster. “It’s clear you care about him. The question is, does he have real feelings for you?”
I sighed. “It doesn’t matter, does it? My problem is this creepy bet he got me involved with. I don’t think I can see past that. I mean, why lie about it if it was innocent?”
“Yeah, that’s fair,” he said. “Well, just chew on your feelings for a while, see if a few days of being lazy will give you some perspective on things.”
“We’ll see, but I’ve already accepted that New York was just a dream, not a reality.”
“Hold on,” he said. “Things didn’t work out with Luke, but that doesn’t mean you have to write off the whole city. Didn’t you tell me about some director who wants to work with you? Callisto or someone.”
I waved his words away. “Ganymede, but I made all those connections through Luke. It feels wrong to follow up with that.”
“It seems fine to me,” he said. “It’s the least you deserve after he lied to you.”
I sighed again. It was better than more crying but not by much. “I can’t even think about all that right now. I have a lot to sort through, and that’s not at the top of the list at the moment.”
There were only a few days until Christmas anyway, and then this would all be over and I could go back to my normal, washed-up life. If the Helios ever reopened, maybe I could get my old job back. That was more my speed. New York was for people like Luke.
“So, listen,” Nic said, bringing over my toast with some butter. “Mom knows you’re back.”
I groaned, and suddenly didn’t have an appetite anymore. “No, already?”
He nodded. “Sorry, I had to tell her. She and Dad want us to come over this afternoon. Have a family meal to celebrate. They’re excited to see you.”
“Okay, a homecooked meal does sound good. I just don’t want to have a whole big conversation about New York. Not right now. Not yet.”
“I’ll tell them to give you some breathing room, okay?” Nic pushed my plate toward me. “Eat. Starving yourself won’t make you feel better.”
“Nothing will make me feel better,” I grumbled and tore a corner off the toast with my teeth.
“Time heals all wounds,” my brother said wisely. “For everything else, there’s alcohol.”
I grinned a bit. “Maybe I’ll bring a flask with me.”
A couple of hours later, we were at my parents’ house, although it was technically also my house. My mom and dad had hugged me breathless and ushered me in like I’d been gone for two years, not two weeks.
Coffee and pastries appeared in my hands like magic, and I wasn’t about to turn them down. I wasn’t sure what Nic had said to them, but they talked to me about everything except my trip to New York.
I appreciated it. They would get the story eventually, but I was too raw and wrung out to relive it all again. It made me feel so na?ve, ashamed of getting tricked.
As we talked, Mom got excited out of nowhere. “Oh, honey, I just remembered. I ran into Mrs. Fletcher the other day. You remember your old English teacher?”
“Of course, she was my drama teacher too.”
“Well, we got to talking about you,” Mom said. “She thought it was a shame you were out of town. They’re looking for volunteers for this year’s Christmas play. You should give her a call.”