19. Chapter 19 Seamus
Chapter 19: Seamus
T wo months on
I leaned back in my chair, a glass of whiskey dangling from my fingers as I surveyed the two men sitting across from me. Finn, my brother in all but blood, and Liam, my mentee and friend.
We were celebrating, the three of us. Celebrating the fact that Finn was now a father, that he and Cara had brought a healthy, squalling baby boy into the world just a few short months ago. Celebrating the fact that soon, so fucking soon, I would be a father too, that Kamilla was round and ripe with my child. I couldn't wait to hold my son or daughter in my arms, to see Kamilla's eyes and my smile and a perfect fucking blend of both of us in one tiny, miraculous package.
"How's Natasha doing?" Finn asked, drawing me out of my sappy, sentimental thoughts. "Kamilla said she's settling in well at that fancy boarding school you found for her."
I nodded, taking a sip of my whiskey and savoring the smooth, smoky burn. "Aye, she's doing grand. Top of her class, from what I hear. Kid's fucking brilliant, just like her aunt."
Liam raised an eyebrow, his expression inscrutable as always. "And you're sure she's safe there? Hidden away from any Bratva bastards who might want to use her as leverage?"
I met his gaze steadily, my own expression hardening. "She's as safe as we can make her, which is pretty fucking safe. New identity, new backstory. Anyone who wants to get to her will have to go through us first.”
Finn nodded. "We take care of our own, and Natasha, she's family now.”
I felt a rush of gratitude to these men who had become my brothers, my fucking tribe. Because they got it, understood the lengths we would go to, the blood we would spill and the lives we would take, to keep the ones we loved safe. Natasha deserved a chance at a normal life, at a childhood free from the shadows and the schemes and the fucking sickness that pervaded every corner of the Bratva.
Kamilla had made that her mission to give Natasha back the innocence that had been ripped away from her, to let her grow and learn and thrive without the weight of her family's legacy crushing her slim shoulders. It was a beautiful thing to witness, the fierce, protective love that Kamilla had for her niece.
I shook myself out of my trance, turning my attention back to the men in front of me. Liam was staring into his whiskey, a frown pulling at the corners of his mouth.
I nudged his foot with my own under the table. "You're looking like someone pissed in your pint and then told you to smile about it."
Liam glanced up at me, his eyes narrowed, his jaw tight. "Nothing. Just thinking."
Finn snorted, taking a swig of his own drink. "Thinking about a certain Italian queen, more like. I've seen the way you look at her. Like you want to eat her alive and then beg for seconds."
Liam scowled, his cheeks flushing a dull red. "Fuck off, Finn. I don't know what you're talking about."
I grinned, leaning forward and resting my elbows on the table. "Course you do, Liam. Aria's got you all twisted up inside, hasn't she? Got you panting after her like a dog in heat, even as you're trying to convince yourself you're too smart, too fucking tough, to fall for a woman like that."
Liam's scowl deepened, his hands clenching around his glass. "A woman like what? A cold-blooded killer? A fucking Black Widow?”
I shrugged, unconcerned. "Way I see it, if those rumors are true, it just means she's strong enough to do what needs to be done.”
Finn nodded; his expression serious. "Seamus is right, Liam. Aria's not waiting for a man to come along. She's a queen, so if you want a chance with her, if you want to be the one she lets into her bed, you need to be man enough to handle that.”
Liam was silent for a long moment. "And what if I'm not?" he asked finally. "What if I'm not man enough, not strong enough, to be the kind of partner she needs? The kind of partner a queen like Aria deserves?"
I exchanged a glance with Finn, a silent conversation passing between us in the space of a heartbeat. Because fuck, we'd been there. We had faced those same doubts when we first started falling for Kamilla and Cara. It wasn't easy, being the man behind the throne. Being the one who had to watch his woman walk into danger and darkness all in the name of duty and honor.
Was it worth it?
Every second. It was worth every second of wondering if we were enough, if we were worthy, if we could be the men they needed us to be. We were still the ones she came home to, the ones they trusted with their hearts and their souls and their fucking sanity.
I leaned back in my chair. "Let me give you a piece of advice, Liam. Something Finn and I have learned, through trial and error and a whole lot of fucking groveling."
Liam raised an eyebrow, his expression wary. "And what's that?"
"When you're lucky enough to have a queen in your bed, you make damn sure she comes first. In every sense of the word."
Finn barked out a laugh. "Damn right. Cara might be the Emerald Queen to the rest of the world, but when she's writhing under me, begging for my cock and my tongue and my fucking fingers, she's just a woman. My woman, and it's my job to worship her until she forgets her own damn name."
I nodded, my own smile turning filthy. "Same goes for Kamilla. She might be the Bratva's queen, but when I've got her on her back, her thighs spread and her cunt dripping for me, she's mine. My responsibility, my fucking privilege, to make her feel so good she can't remember why she ever put on that crown in the first place."
Liam stared at us, his eyes wide, his throat working as he swallowed hard. "Jesus fuck. You two are- I don't even know what you are. Insane, maybe. Or just so fucking whipped you can't see straight."
I shrugged, unrepentant. "Call it what you want, but the fact is, Kamilla and Cara are queens, aye. They're powerful and fierce and they need men who can match that.”
Finn leaned forward, his expression serious. "But they're also women, Liam. Women with needs and desires and fucking vulnerabilities, just like any other. And it's our job, our fucking honor, to be the ones they can let down their guard with. The ones they can be soft with, be vulnerable with, be fucking human with."
I nodded, my own face softening. "Aye. At the end of the day that's what matters. Not the crowns or the thrones or the fucking empires they've built. But the love, the trust that comes from knowing you've found your match. Your equal, your fucking soulmate in all the ways that count."
Liam was quiet for a long moment, then slowly, a smile started to curve his lips.
"I think I get it," he said softly, almost to himself. "I think I fucking get it now."
I grinned, raising my glass in a toast. "About damn time, Liam. About damn fucking time."
As we clinked our glasses together, as we drank to love and queens and the fierce, fucking unbreakable bonds that held us all together and that Liam was in for one hell of a ride.
My sapphire eyed queen and our soon to be child.