24. Londyn #2
“Okay. I get it.” Malcomb looked down at Dalton and smiled. “You two take the time you need, and when you’re ready, I’ll be waiting.”
I nodded, then reached down and took Dalton’s hand in mine.
Without giving Malcomb a kiss or even saying goodbye, I grabbed our bag and rushed out to my car.
There was a dull ache in my chest as I put Dalton in his car seat.
A part of me wished that Malcomb would’ve come after us and demanded that we stay.
But that wasn’t Malcomb. He wasn’t going to force either of us to do something we weren’t ready to do.
Heavy-hearted, I got in the car, and as I drove through the gate, I spotted Malcomb in the corner of my eye. He was standing by the backdoor with a solemn look on his face as he watched us drive away.
Damn.
What the hell was I doing?
I should’ve turned that car around and gone right back to him, but I didn’t.
I just kept driving and driving, and before I even realized where I was going, I pulled into my parents’ driveway.
It was still early, so there was a good chance that I could catch my mother before she went to work.
I quickly parked, and after I helped Dalton out of his seat, we both headed up the front steps.
I was just about to knock when the door flew open, and my mother greeted us with a big smile. “What in the world?”
Dalton rushed up to her with arms wide open as he shouted, “Grangran!”
“Oh, my goodness! What are you two doing here?”
“I really need to talk to you.”
“Of course!” She picked Dalton up and started back inside as she said, “Come on in, and I’ll make us some coffee.”
“Do you have time? I know you need to get to work.”
“Oh, don’t worry about that.” Mom turned on the TV and found one of Dalton’s favorite shows. “Work can wait.”
She let Daisy out of her kennel, and she and Dalton started playing in the living room while Mom and I headed into the kitchen. Mom started up a fresh pot of coffee as she said, “I thought you were going home last night.”
“That was the plan, but then some guy tried to run us off the road, and we ended up at the clubhouse.”
“What?”
“It’s nothing. We’re fine. It was just a little scare, but Cotton and the guys took care of it.”
“Well, it’s good you had them to turn to, I guess.”
“It was.”
She walked over and motioned for me to sit down at the table with her. “Okay. Get over here and tell me what’s going on with you.”
“It’s Malcomb.” I pulled the chair out and sat down. “He’s wanting us to move in with him.”
“Yeah, you told me about that a couple of days ago. I thought you were excited about it.”
“I thought I was, too.” I shrugged. “Now, I’m not so sure.”
“Why? Did something happen?”
“No, nothing like that. I just...” Tears started to pool in my eyes as I told her, “I’m just so confused and scared.”
“Scared of what, honey?”
“Of getting lost in him only to lose him again. I just don’t think my heart could take it if something happened.”
Mom placed her hand on my shoulder, squeezing it gently. “I understand why you’re scared, but you can’t live your life in fear. You have to be willing to take chances.”
“And if things don’t work out, and I get my heart ripped out again?”
“Then, you’ll handle it, but I don’t think you’re going to have to worry about that. Malcomb loves you. He’s not going anywhere.”
“I know, but…” My voice trailed off as the tears flowed freely down my face. “I just don’t know.”
Mom and I went back and forth for quite some time. We finished one cup of coffee, and we were about to have another when Mom said something to me that I would never forget:
“There are two kinds of love, Londyn. The one that burns bright and can warm you inside and out. It’s beautiful, wild, and free, but it burns hot and fast, and then it’s gone.
Then there is the one that’s like a river.
It changes and flows, twists and turns, but it is steady and strong.
It meanders, but it always finds its way home. ”
She reached over and placed her hand on mine. “Only you can tell if the love you have with Malcomb is one that burns or one that flows, but if it flows like that river, you should hold onto it because those are the hardest to find.”
“It’s been five years since we were together, and I still love him like I did back then. And I think he feels the same way about me.”
“Then, I’d say you have your answer.”
“I’m moving in with him, Mom. I’m moving in with today. Like now.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’m sure.” My eyes drifted to the ground as I added, “I’m sure Dad will be thrilled.”
“Your dad just wants you to be happy.”
“Yeah, that’s what I’d always thought until he broke my heart and then did nothing to help fix it.” I shrugged as I told her, “He’s my dad. I will always love him, but I’m not sure I will ever forgive him.”
“And that’s okay. You don’t have to forgive him, but I hope, in time, you will.”
“I do, too,” Dad whispered from the doorway.
“Dad,” I gasped. “I didn’t realize you were here.”
“I wasn’t. I just came back to grab my laptop. I left it here by mistake.”
I didn’t respond.
I couldn’t.
I didn’t know what to say to him.
He stepped into the kitchen, his eyes on mine as he said, “I really do hope that one day you will be able to forgive me, sweetheart. I love you so much, and I can’t bear the thought of losing you. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
“You’re not going to lose me, Dad. You did lose my trust, and I’m not sure that you will ever get it back.”
“That doesn’t mean I’m going to stop trying. I’ll do whatever I have to do, and not just for you and Dalton, but for your mother, too.” He walked over to me and gave me a kiss on my forehead. “I’ve got to get to work. I hope I’ll be seeing you again soon.”
He kissed my mother, and after a quick word with Dalton, he was gone. I felt indifferent about his departure, and I could tell from my mother’s expression that she felt the same way, which led me to ask, “Is everything okay with you two?”
“No, it’s not, but that’s nothing for you to worry about.”
“But I do worry. I don’t want what happened with me and Dad to affect you two.”
“How can it not? He lied to us both. But we will get through this. We always do.” She reached over and patted my hand. “Now stop fretting over your father and me and go see about Malcomb.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, now skedaddle.”
“Okay, okay.” We both stood, and I gave Mom a big hug. “Thanks, Mom. You’re the best.”
“Anytime, sweet girl.”
She helped me get Dalton in the car, then stood at the end of the driveway and waved as I backed out into the street.
It was crazy how a brief conversation with my mother could put everything into perspective, but that’s exactly what it had done.
I knew I wanted a life with Malcomb, and I wasn’t going to wait another second to have it.
He said he would be waiting for us, but when we pulled up to his house, I wasn’t sure if he was even home.
There was no sign of his truck or his bike, but I took a chance and got Dalton and our bag from the car.
I was about to start up the steps when the front door opened, and Malcomb stepped out. “You came.”
“Yeah, I’m sorry about earlier. I just needed a minute to think.”
“And you’re good now?”
“I am.” I smiled as I told him, “We’re a river.”
“Come again?”
“We’re like a river.” I walked up the steps and smiled. “It can take a little time, but we always find our way home.”
“It’s a little philosophical, but I like it.” He slipped his arms around my waist and pulled me close. “Welcome home, baby.”
He leaned down and kissed me, and for the first time in a very long time, I knew that everything was going to be okay. Dalton and I were home, and that was where we were going to stay.