32. 32
32
B y the time they made it back to the ranch, Donna’s nerves had settled, and her stomach along with it. They had found her but hadn’t dragged her back. Sure, they probably would have if Savage hadn’t been there to stop Jacob, but he had and since she had no plans to go anywhere without him, at least not any time soon, she felt safe. Or at least as safe as she could knowing they were looking for her.
That didn’t matter. Not here. Savage and the rest of the men were watching for them. They wouldn’t let anyone get to her. Of that, she was sure. Especially after today.
“Did you guys have a good time?” Beth asked as they stepped into the common area after parking the bike.
“The movie was great,” Donna said, not wanting to get into the parts of the day that weren’t so great.
“Is Sadist still working?” Savage asked, tilting his head toward the bunk house.
“Yeah, he’ll probably be at it another couple of hours tonight. He said he’s got at least two more days’ work here, if not three,” Beth said.
“Cool. I’m going to step inside and talk to him.” He turned to Donna. “Have a seat. I don’t know how long I’ll be. You should get comfortable.” He waited while she sat then turned and disappeared into the building. She watched him go then turned and found the other women watching her.
“Kinda gone on him already?” Kerry asked.
Donna didn’t know what to say, so she stayed silent, but she couldn’t stop her face from heating.
“There’s no need to be embarrassed,” London put in, “we’ve all been there. Most of us fell far quicker than we ever anticipated and for someone who, at least on the outside, was the last kind of guy we thought we’d end up with.”
“They look rough,” Dana said. “And they can be hard when they need to be.”
“Like when someone they care about is threatened,” Sissy said, “or hurt. Then there’s no stopping them.”
“But they’re good men,” Dana finished, as if that was where she’d been going with what she’d been saying all along, and maybe it was.
L ater, as she brushed her teeth and got ready for bed, she could hear the low buzz of voices in the next room as Sadist gave whoever he’d been working on instructions on how to take care of the tattoo and cleaned up his workspace. She let her mind go back to the morning she’d met Savage, he hadn’t been wearing a shirt and she’d seen several tattoos. At the time she hadn’t paid much attention to what they were. She’d been too concerned about getting farther away from Fort Collins.
Now though, she thought about it. She hadn’t spent any time watching as the man in the next room had worked, but she’d had to walk through the place a couple of times going back and forth to the bathroom, and now she wondered what might motivate someone to go through that. To voluntarily get stabbed thousands of times, leaving some design permanently inked into their skin. She’d known several people with tattoos but the few who she’d gathered the nerve to ask about them either told her they didn’t know, it was something they’d felt like they needed to do, or more often, they’d been drunk when they’d decided to get something done.
She wondered if she’d ever feel strongly enough about something to want to wear it on her skin for the rest of her life. Well, they did have a way to remove them now, but no one went into a tattoo planning to have it removed.
She finished up what she was doing, then packed up the little bag with her things as she prepared to go back to the tent. As she turned toward the entrance, she noticed that the sounds from the other room had stopped. The men must have finished and left. If she’d been paying more attention, she probably would have heard them. But she’d been lost in her own head.
Making sure she had everything, she picked up her bag and headed out the door. She was half way across the main room, focused on the door and Savage, who said he’d be coming to bed soon too, when a voice from the other side of the room startled her.
“You’re Donna, right?” the low voice asked.
She couldn’t help the scared squeak that escaped as she jumped, then spun to see who had snuck up on her. One hand flew up to cover her mouth as she stood staring at him.
“Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. I thought you knew I was here.” It was Sadist, still packing several things into a large bag that resembled a backpack but not one like she ever remembered seeing in a store.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t see you there. Yes, I’m Donna.” She forced herself to lower her hand and stay where she was, not hurry out the door like her nerves wanted her to.
“Do you mind talking to me for a minute?” He motioned to the table and several chairs sitting around it, as if he wanted her to have a seat.
Donna stared at the chair, wondering if she should sit. She couldn’t help the way she glanced at the door, wondering if maybe she should just leave.
It wasn’t that she thought he would hurt her, no she didn’t think Beth would put up with someone who did that, but she didn’t know what he would do. What kind of guy went by a name like Sadist anyway?
“You can ask Savage to join us if it would make you more comfortable.” He motioned one hand toward the door. “Or I can have Beth come in so you don’t feel like I’m trying to threaten you.”
She glanced in that direction again then dismissed getting Savage. That he’d offered to let her ask that someone else be present was enough. Instead, she changed directions, went to the table, pulled out a chair and sat.
“What would you like to talk about?”
“Savage told us a little about what’s going on with you,” he said.
Donna nodded, she’d told Savage he could tell them whatever he thought they needed to know, even about her pregnancy. She expected he’d done just that.
“Look at me, little one.” Sadist’s voice pulled her attention back to him.
Slowly, she turned her face back to him, not wanting to see what he thought of her now that he knew her shame.
“He didn’t tell us to be gossiping. He wanted to enlist help from the club. He needed to tell us why he was asking us to put ourselves and our women, at risk.” His voice was kind, but firm.
After a moment she hazarded a glance at his face, hoping she wouldn’t see contempt, or worse pity, there. She saw neither. Instead, she saw what she thought was compassion.
“We’ll help, that wasn’t in question, but I wanted to talk to you about a couple of things.”
“What?” she asked, frowning in confusion.
“I need to know what you’re after here. Are you in it because you care about Savage or are you just looking for a way to get out of your situation.”
Her face heated, she wondered what kind of person he thought she was.
Sadist held up one hand to stop her as she started to speak. “I don’t mean that as callous as it sounded. And either way, it won’t change whether or not the Souls help you. No woman should be stuck in the kind of situation Savage told me about. But I need to know.”
She stared at him for a moment, opened her mouth then closed it again as she let his words sink in. After a moment she started again.
“When I met him, it was about getting away. How could it have been anything else? I was desperate enough to get on the back of a motorcycle with a man I’d known a couple of hours. But since then I’ve gotten to know him a little better. Not just the surface stuff like what he likes and dislikes but more. I know it’s only been a few days, but in that time, he’s shown me so much about his character. It’s hard to believe, especially for me and given what I’m just getting away from but there is a lot to him that I like, and I think, given time, I could fall hard for him. He’s so kind, so gentle, even when he has no reason to be.” She looked down at the table. “I don’t know what all he told you, but Noah wasn’t who I thought he was, and I knew him for months before we joined the commune. At that time, I thought he was the one I’d be with for the rest of my life. I don’t know if he was always that way or something about the commune changed him. I will probably never know.” She took a deep breath and let it out as she tried to get her heart to stop racing. “I stumbled across something that could be amazing when I found Savage. I’m not here to take advantage of him. I’ve told him several times I don’t need everything he buys or wants to buy, but I can’t seem to stop him. I don’t need him to spend his money on me. I can make do. But what can I do when he insists?” She shrugged, hoping he would see how helpless she sometimes felt.
It wasn’t that she wanted him to feel sorry for her, but since he’d decided he needed to question her, she felt like she had to make sure he understood. She had just asked for a ride. Help getting farther away from Noah and the commune.
After today’s encounter, she suspected that if Savage had done as she asked and just helped her find a shelter, they would have found her already before today. And with no one to step between them the way he had, she’d be back at the commune enduring whatever they had planned as her punishment for daring to run.
“I’m not worried about how he spends his money or even if you’re sleeping with him. I’m worried about the club. He’s asked that we get involved in some things that have the potential for long term consequences. I would like to have at least a bit of an idea that the relationship has a chance of lasting longer than the cost. I’m not saying we wouldn’t protect you but how invested you are in this might affect our methods.”
Donna frowned. She felt like he was talking around something, but had no idea what he wasn’t saying. She was about to ask what he meant when he spoke again.
“Thank you for taking the time to stop when I asked. I’m sure Savage is wondering what’s taking so long.” He tilted his head toward the yard they had been using as a gathering space. The area where she knew Savage was indeed waiting for her.
A little befuddled at what he’d learned from those few questions, Donna picked up her bag and went out to find Savage. She was ready to call it a day.