Chapter 10
Harlow
A week had passed since I came home from the hospital, and I felt okay. My ribs were tender and I knew they would take longer to heal. My nightmares were calming down, but they were still pretty vivid and terrifying.
Xavier was dead. It felt surreal that one man who tormented me the most was finally gone.
What he did to me no longer mattered, and I was finally closer to total freedom.
Caterina killed him, which meant she could kill Vincenzo in the future.
She saved me. She gave me a life. She showed me what it meant to be loved.
Caterina gave me a reason to live, and not just because she loved me.
This wasn’t a romance movie where the main character lost herself for the love interest.
Caterina saved me, but she also gave me freedom and life.
I no longer felt like I was barely hanging on by a thread; I was finally living.
There was a knock on my bedroom door which I found odd, because Caterina never knocked.
She should also come back to me soon. She had to deal with Xavier’s body, unless something happened.
Luca was standing there, waiting for me as I opened the door. When he looked at me, he quickly averted his gaze. “Are you okay?” I asked.
“You don’t have pants on. Lizzy and Cat will wring my neck.”
I glanced down, realizing I only had on a long-sleeved, white button-up that stopped midthigh.
It barely covered anything, but I had panties on.
“I wouldn’t let Caterina kill you. Gimme a second.
” I closed the door and quickly shimmied into a pair of shorts.
They were short, but they were the closest thing I could find.
I opened the door once more and Luca was in the same spot. “Is Caterina okay?”
He nodded. “Cat is fine. She and Malachi are still dealing with Xavier’s body. I need you to talk to Lizzy.”
“What’s wrong?”
He sighed. This was the longest conversation I had alone with Luca. He never spoke to anyone but Lizzy and Caterina. “She’s blaming herself for what happened. She won’t talk to me and she wakes up screaming.”
“It’s not her fault, though.”
“Everyone knows that. Please tell her, I think she needs to hear it from you.”
“Okay. Thank you for telling me. I’ll go to her now.”
Luca went to the kitchen while I walked to their bedroom.
My hip hurt, but I was not lounging in bed when my best friend needed me.
He said Lizzy wouldn’t get up to open the door, but the door was unlocked so I could walk in.
I still knocked on the door, but Lizzy never answered.
Invading someone’s privacy was not what I enjoyed, but my best friend needed me.
When I pushed the door open, Lizzy pulled the blanket over her head. I could see movement and knew she was crying. “Lizzy,” I said as I turned on the light. It was odd being in their bedroom. You could tell Luca was a tech person because that was all his bedroom was—like a control room.
Several monitors were in the bedroom’s corner, with a table full of random parts and spare cameras.
He had a camera in his own room, which I found odd, but I figured with a past like mine and Lizzy’s it was never too much to be safe.
I knew Lizzy’s side of the room because she had three bookshelves filled with a variety of books and makeup.
“Lizzy,” I said more sternly. “Stop wallowing and talk to me.”
She pushed the blanket off of her face and sat up.
Her hair was disheveled, and her eyes were red and puffy.
When she looked at me, her lips trembled and more tears filled her eyes.
Instantly, I went to her side and pulled her into my arms as she sobbed.
She was there for me and continued to be the person I needed, so I would make sure she had that, too.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry,” she cried as she pulled me into her more. It was like she thought I would disappear if she wasn’t holding onto me.
“It’s not your fault, Lizzy.”
She hiccupped as she pulled away from me. “I was the one who said we should leave Vito and Raul.”
“And I joined you. Xavier was watching us; it would have happened anywhere. He chose the sex shop. I’m not angry. We are both safe.”
“I was free, Harlow. For five years, I trained with Spencer, practiced self-defense, and when it mattered most, all I did was cry. I was useless. He…Harlow, you saved my life, and it almost cost you yours.”
I grabbed her hands. “My sessions did nothing, either. I was scared, but I also wanted you to be safe. You were free for so much longer than me. You were safe until I came back. Everything that happened is my fault.”
“Never say that again! This is not your fault. Being free is not a consequence of the hell you endured.”
I squeezed her hands reassuringly. “Only if you accept that what happened wasn’t your fault, either.”
She frowned. “I…I’ll try.”
“That’s better than nothing. I’m just glad you are safe. If I went back, so be it. Vincenzo wouldn’t kill me. If he had you again, you’d be dead. I can’t let that happen.”
“He wouldn’t kill you, but he would have made you wish you were dead.”
“But I would fight. I finally have a reason. You. Caterina. My mom. I wish she was here to see me free and in love.”
“She’s watching over you,” Lizzy reassured. “How are you? Like really?”
I smiled. “You know I already have therapy with Serena later today. I’m okay.
I’m…I don’t know. I think I was expecting something to happen, so when it did, I wasn’t as terrified for myself.
As horrible as it sounds, when Xavier made me…
it felt natural, but foreign.” I gave her a sympathetic look.
“I know it’s not healthy and that’s why I am talking to Serena.
Until then, let’s go get you actual food and maybe you can kiss your boyfriend. ”
“Tell me how you felt the moment you were taken,” Serena said. It was finally time for my first session after being home for over a week.
“I was scared, but not for myself. When Xavier said he had Lizzy, I knew I had to protect her.”
“Protect her and not yourself?”
I smiled and nodded. “Yeah. I never fully believed I would be safe, so when it happened, I wasn’t disappointed. It was like going back into habit.”
She scribbled on her notepad. I learned it wasn’t always bad when she wrote things down. “Caterina informed me that something happened. That’s how Lizzy could escape.”
“He asked what I would do to save her life. I figured he would have raped me again, but he wanted a blowjob instead.” I took a deep breath. “I knew it would cause me pain, but I didn’t fight. And when he was distracted enough, I bit him. Hard. Then I told Lizzy to run.”
“I know Lizzy is your best friend, but why did you choose to save her before yourself?”
“Because Lizzy would have died if she went back there. I would have suffered to an extent, but Vincenzo wouldn’t have killed me. Lizzy was free and had a beautiful life. I’d miss everyone, but like I told Lizzy, I’d have a reason to fight.”
“Harlow, you are too pure for this life. I believe we are okay with continuing sessions once every week unless you need more. If you have nightmares or need an emergency session, you know where I am.”
I nodded. “Thank you. I think I am okay for the first time in a long time. I have Caterina. And everyone else.”