Chapter 37
Harlow
“I knew I should’ve given you to him sooner,” my father scoffed in the corner.
I’d reached a new level of psychosis, because he was dead—or maybe I was on the cusp end of death, and this was my hell away from hell. “Go away.”
“All you had to do was spread your legs, and we would be good.”
“You sold me to a monster before I was born.”
He stepped closer. His face was distorted because I could barely remember what he looked like. He wasn’t anything to me now. He was a different type of monster in my memory because he caused this pain and made us deal with worse devils and trauma to last three lifetimes.
“All you are worth is what’s between your legs. Your mom, too.”
“Shut up.”
He cocked his head to the side. “She was worthless, just like you.”
“SHUT UP!” I flung the poor excuse of a pillow into the empty void. No one was there. He was never here.
My body fell to the side of the horrid cot and I winced as pain ricocheted through my body. Fresh tears spilled from my eyes. I needed to fight, but fighting felt pointless. No one was coming, and I wasn’t getting out. My eyes felt heavy as the darkness danced around me.
Why did my mind have to betray me, too?
First my body, now this.
He should just kill me and get it over with.
Guilt danced in my stomach as I thought about Serenity. She was my reason to keep fighting so I could come home to her, but fighting was exhausting. I wanted the pain to stop. I wanted everything to stop.
Bellissima...Her voice was soft, like wind dancing through my hair.
Not again. Please.
Give me silence—death.
I squeezed my eyes shut. Existing was already painful enough. I didn’t need the reminder of what I lost again.
I’m coming for you.
“No you’re not. You died!”
Caterina’s face came into view a few feet away from me. I blinked, but she didn’t leave. Her eyes shone like a beacon in the dark haze of this hellhole full of warmth.
This wasn’t real.
Bellissima.
I cringed. “Stop. You’re not here.”
A faint hum filled the room, the same one she did in the shower and when I would have panic attacks.
She wasn’t here. My mind lost all sense of reality, and I was falling apart at the seams. My body was broken and now my mind was following behind.
It was an added torment, but this time it was more painful than any knife wound.
Be strong, bellissima. For us. We’re coming.
My body jerked off the bed as reality hit me.
I was still in the room, only I wasn’t alone.
Vincenzo made sure the doctor came to visit me every few days to make sure he wasn’t killing me.
He wasn’t gentle when he raped me. Vincenzo got heavy handed with his knife, carving months of anger into my skin to make up for the time I was free.
I needed him to end my misery, but he was a sick bastard and would torment me until my body gave up.
The doctor checked me over, frowning at my blood pressure. “He needs to take you to a hospital.”
I scoffed, jerking my arm from him. “Good luck, asshole. How are you a doctor if you let him do this to me? Aren’t you supposed to help people?”
He sighed, pressing his stethoscope to my chest. I moved, but he dug his hand into my shoulder to keep me still. He was silent for a moment, listening to my chest and lungs before he spoke once more. “We all have our reasons.”
“Well hopefully your reason doesn’t hate you.”
“A lot of people hate me, but I hate myself more. I’ll be back in a few days. Vincenzo will have medicine for you to take. I would leave it here, but you might kill yourself.”
Bastard.