27. Mila
27
MILA
Killian was gone for one entire day and night.
Despite Sila and Maverick’s best attempts to distract me, it had only worked for a little while. I was still worried.
We were reaching mid-afternoon. Maverick and Silas were in Maverick’s office, getting on the phone with a man named Gregory Perez. I was trying to remember why that name sounded familiar, but at this moment, it took more energy than I had. I took in the beautiful garden of the Tiernans’ property. Even when I had been a captive here, this had been my favorite place. The book I had brought with me now lay face down on the concrete bench I was sitting on. I had planned on reading to distract myself from worry, but even that couldn’t hold my attention.
I was taking in all the colorful flowers nearby when I felt the solid form of another person sitting close to me.
I startled and looked up into dark brown eyes and a severe expression.
I didn’t say anything, even as my heart went into overdrive at the sight of him.
Killian.
He was finally back, and I didn’t know how to act with him.
It hadn’t been that long, but fuck, did I miss him.
His gaze focused on me, and I knew he wouldn’t say anything first.
So I started. But when I opened my mouth, nothing came out. I could feel the words lodged in my throat.
Then, “Where were you?”
That wasn’t what I wanted to say, but that was what came out. One of his eyebrows rose at the accusing note in my voice. I crossed my arms and glowered at him. I wasn’t going to take it back. He left without saying a word, and for a full twenty-four hours, I didn’t know where he was. Anything could have happened to him.
My bottom lip trembled, and his eyes widened, a sort of panic overtaking his expression. He no longer looked serious.
He wrapped his arms around me. “Fuck, baby. What’s wrong?”
“What’s wrong ?” I asked, pressing my hands down flat on his chest and pushing off a little. He didn’t let me get far. “You left.”
He closed his eyes briefly, then opened them and looked back at me, a tinge of regret in his dark irises. “Ah, firecracker, I’m sorry. There was something I needed to do. Needed to see.”
I shot him a questioning look.
He directed his gaze out to the garden, taking in the flowers. “I needed to see Lilliana.”
There was that name again.
I was beginning to really hate that name. I didn’t reply.
He let out a small sigh. “She was my first relationship.”
“You’ve been in a relationship before?”
He shot me a dark, amused look. “Yes, brat. I’ve been in a relationship before.”
I shook my head. “Sorry. It’s just… kind of hard to imagine.”
He laughed lightly. “Yeah? Well, you’re not that far off. She was the only relationship. Until you.”
The last part was said quietly. I relaxed my hands, no longer fighting to get away. Instead, I found my fists curling into the black shirt he had on.
“Why did you go see her?” I asked softly.
“To put old demons to rest.”
I frowned, and he reached up, soothing the pad of his finger between my eyebrows.
“She was older than me by three years. And I thought I was in love with her.”
“But you’re not?” I asked, wondering if she still had a part of him, even now. A part that would be totally untouchable to me.
He shook his head, smiling a little. “I never was. It was mostly infatuation. She came into my life when everything had felt so out of control. I was young and helpless. Maverick wasn’t much older than me, but already, he felt steady. He was the strength Silas and I needed to keep forging on, even when everything felt so… unbalanced.”
I didn’t try to meet his eyes. I had a feeling it was easier for him to tell me these things when he wasn’t looking at me.
“So I clung to her, never knowing she was stabbing me in the back. She was the one who gave your father the code to our gates, helping lead forty men onto our property that night, remaining undetected until they decided to attack. It was one of the reasons they were able to take over. That, and the fact that we were sorely outnumbered.”
I gasped, and he looked at me, his eyes unreadable. I raised my hand, about to cup his cheek, but hesitated. What if he rejected me?
I should have known better. Killian nuzzled into my palm. I took in his stubble, the hair a little more overgrown than how he usually wore it.
“You know I would never betray you, don’t you?” I asked. I needed him to know. Agent Jones could have come to me and offered me the world, and I would have never spoken a word against the brothers.
His eyes softened—as much as he was able. “I know, little firecracker. I never doubted that.”
I nodded. “Good. ’Cause I love you so much. I?—”
“Shh, baby. I know. I know.”
I blinked away the sudden moisture that sprang into my eyes. Taking a deep breath, I tried to control my bearing.
I pulled away from Killian and looked back at the garden. “So you went to see her?”
He nodded. “Yeah.”
Did he kill her? I didn’t ask that, unsure if I really wanted to know the answer. I was surprised he’d actually let her live this long.
“No, I didn’t kill her,” Killian said, answering my unasked question.
My eyes widened slightly. “I didn’t say anything.”
He chuckled. “But you wanted to. I always knew where she was. She didn’t even recognize me. And her life is miserable. I thought that was a more fitting punishment than whatever I could have done to her.”
I didn’t need to ask him for the details.
“And you think you can finally put it behind you? Move on with me?” I asked.
He looked down at his wrist, his fingers tracing over the small black Roman numeral tattoo. “Yes, baby. She’s my past. And you’re my future. With you by my side, I am learning to forgive myself.”
My heart broke a little from his words. If he was just learning to forgive himself for the things that weren't his fault to begin with, then that meant he had lived the last nineteen years festering in guilt.
“You know it’s not your fault what happened, right? Someone you trusted took advantage of you,” I said softly.
He let out a small laugh. “You sound just like Maverick.”
“Because it’s true.”
He didn’t say anything. I didn’t need him to. He probably didn’t agree with me, and I knew nothing I said now would convince him otherwise.
I leaned over and pressed my fingers over the tattoo on his wrist as well.
“What does this mean?”
“It’s the number seven twenty-six.”
I blinked. “Like July twenty-six?”
He shot me a small smile. “Yes.”
“That’s my birthday.”
His smile widened. “I know.”
I wasn’t too conceited to think he had gotten this tattoo for me. I knew he hadn’t. And the tattoo looked old, so he’d obviously gotten it before he met me.
“It is the day your father attacked our family home,” he said.
I didn’t reply to that. Was it shocking that my father attacked their home on my birthday? Absolutely not. Dad probably didn’t even remember the significance of the date when he decided to take his men for a bloodbath.
“I had this done to remind myself of that day. To remind myself not to put my heart on the line, and to always put the organization first. I threw myself into helping Maverick rebuild our empire, and perhaps I lost myself a little along the way.” He grabbed my hand, and brought it to his lips, kissing the inside of my wrist. My breath caught as I looked at him. There was something animated about his eyes. “For so long, this date was everything bad and wrong and ugly. But now…”
“Now?” I asked, my voice whisper-soft.
“It is the day you were born. There is nothing bad or wrong or ugly about it. It’s my saving grace.”
The tears that had pooled in my eyes fell. He wiped away the first drop, frowning a little. “That wasn’t supposed to make you sad.”
“I’m not,” I answered, moving closer to him. “I’m not. I just… I love you so much.”
His shoulders relaxed. “I love you too.”
He leaned down and kissed me before I could even say anything. I moaned against his lips and wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer to me, and closer still.
Not enough. It wasn’t enough.
I climbed into his lap and eliminated as much space between our bodies as possible and he kissed me harder.
“Killian,” I cried when he pulled away.
His eyes glowed, and he grabbed his phone. “Fuck,” he said under his breath. I watched as he pressed a button on the phone before bringing it to his ear. I could hear Maverick’s voice on the other line.
“Killian?”
“Tell all the guards to evacuate from the garden. Now.”
I instinctively glanced around but didn’t see anything.
Maverick didn’t reply right away. Then, “Why?”
Killian turned to me, and I swallowed from the predatory look in his eyes. “Because when I fuck Mila out here, I don’t want any of these fuckers to see her. To hear her. I’ll kill them all.”
I shivered as Maverick laughed on the other end of the line. “Done.”
“Killian?” I asked.
His hands gripped my waist, and he looked around.
For a moment, nothing happened. Then, heavy footfalls. We were pretty hidden in the garden as it was, so I didn’t see all the men who’d left, but there must have been a lot of guards on the property because it sounded like a roaring thunder. How did I not know there were so many men around?
When the noise finally died away, Killian turned to me. I tried to scramble off his lap, my heart about to drop down to my stomach, but he stopped me.“Where do you think you’re going?” he asked, wrapping my hair around his fist and pulling.
I felt that tug all the way to my clit.
I bit my bottom lip, pressing down on his hard thigh. “Killian. What are we doing?”
His eyes were encased in dark amusement. “Do you really not know?”
“I—” My words were cut off when he started to yank on my shirt. He pulled it up and off me before I could even blink, leaving me in nothing but my white bra. My skin goose-bumped, even though it was a pretty warm summer day, and Killian’s dark eyes took me in.
He pressed his hand over the curve of my breast, playing with the supple flesh. I wiggled, and he reached inside my bra and pinched my nipple.
“Killian.” I whimpered.
“Such a good girl for me. I fucking missed you.So fucking much.”
I couldn’t say anything, because he was moving his hand around and unhooking my bra. He pulled it down my arms, baring me out in the bright sunshine. Being naked outside made me feel even more exposed than usual.
Killian’s eyes on me definitely didn’t help one bit.
He leaned down and took one of my nipples into his mouth, sucking me in.
My back arched when he rolled the hardened nub around with his teeth, and he hummed against me. Fuck.
He pulled back suddenly, a vicious growl escaping from his lips. My breath was erratic. Before I could say anything, he helped me off his lap.
“Strip the rest of the way, baby.”
I sucked in a sharp breath and looked around again. He’d ordered the guards to leave but we were still outside, in the middle of the afternoon. The hot sun beat down on us, on me.
He turned me around slightly and slapped his hand on my ass. I had shorts on, but they were thin. I jumped from the stinging pain, yelping.
“Strip. Don’t make me repeat myself,” he said harshly.
I stayed where I was, a small defiant part of me rearing its ugly head. I crossed my arms over my chest awkwardly, trying to look mean. Killian stared back with amusement. I got it. It was hard to look intimidating shirtless. Killian slowly stood to his full height, tugging his shirt over his head in one smooth move. My mouth went dry at the sight as he stood in front of me with not a hint of awkwardness.
He was even more intimidating and imposing without a shirt. I swallowed loudly, and his smile went up a notch. He undid his jeans, pushing them down and revealing powerful, muscular thighs.
I took a small step back.
“Did you want to play, baby girl?”
I let out a stuttering breath. Excitement and apprehension danced up and down my spine. I took another step back. He was full-on smiling now, baring teeth.
“No?” he asked mildly. “You’re not going to answer me? I’ll tell you what. I’ll count to four. And by the time I finish, you’ll either strip and lie down on the bench so I can have my fill of you, right before I fuck you hard, or you can run.”
Four seconds? What kind of head start was that? Also, four was a fucking random number. I looked down at his long legs. They would easily eat the distance between us if I ran.
“One,” he said, his eyes glinting. He was enjoying this, I realized. A small smile tugged on my lips. Hell, I was enjoying this too.
“Two.”
I didn’t wait. With a squeal, I twisted around and ran away.
Killian’s laugh followed me as I ran out of the garden, into the huge expanse of space before me. It wasn’t like I had forgotten how big the property was, but now there was an overwhelming feeling inside me. I turned left just as Killian shouted, “Four!”
I was sure it was longer than four seconds, but I wasn’t going to question it.
“Crap,” I muttered to myself. I ran to the decent-sized pool on the property. If I remembered correctly, the gym was also there.
I tried not to think about the fact that I was still shirtless. Or the sight I must have made on the cameras, which I was sure would be watched by one or more of my men later on.
I’d barely stepped foot over the imaginary line from where the garden ended to where the pool area began when his arms snaked around me.
I let out a startled sound, half laughter, half in fright, wiggling in Killian’s arms, hoping to escape.
Killian pulled me close, his lips touching my ear. “Got you.”
His hand moved up, and he fondled me roughly. A moan escaped before I could think better of it, and Killian bit my earlobe.
He pushed me gently to the grass beneath us. Before I could get my bearings, Killian was kneeling behind me, pulling my shorts off.
I closed my eyes when I felt a slight breeze against my slick skin, and Killian’s hand was there, playing with me. I pushed my ass toward him, and he didn’t disappoint when he quickened his fingers over my slit.
“Fuck, baby. You’re so fucking wet. Is this all for me?”
He spanked my ass once when I didn’t answer him fast enough. I jolted and peered back to find his face set in harsh lines.
I nodded, answering him.
He moved his fingers faster against me, massaging over the lips. I closed my eyes when a squelching sound came out of me, and Killian grunted, sounding almost like he was in pain.
My arms shook from having to hold my weight over the grass, and I nearly buckled when he moved his fingers up, playing with my asshole. Hell.
“For running from me, I’m going to plug you later.”
“Hell,” I said out loud.
He laughed. “Oh, baby girl, you have no idea.”
I closed my eyes when he teasingly pushed the tip of his finger inside me, then out, then back in again.
“Please, Killian.”
He pulled out of me completely and slapped my ass cheek. “Hush, now, little firecracker. You’re not in charge, are you?”
“No,” I answered as his other hand reached around and played with my nipple, tweaking it every once in a while. He flipped me around suddenly until I was on the grass, his body hovering above me. The bright afternoon sun shone down on us. He fumbled between us, and he shoved his boxer briefs down enough for his cock to spring free. I licked my lips at the sight, and he shot me a knowing smile. He grabbed himself, stroking roughly on his length before slapping the top over my clit. My back arched, and my hands automatically reached for his shoulders.
He cock-slapped me a few times before driving inside me, the thrust deliciously brutal.
I threw my head to the side and screamed as pleasure ate at me, my fingernails digging into his skin, wanting more. He fucked me.
Our skin smacked against each other, the sound loud and intrusive in the quiet outdoors without another soul in sight.
“Killian,” I said. His eyes seemed to have gotten darker, his skin flushed, and his dark hair a mess on top of his head. He looked savagely beautiful, and I couldn’t get enough.
“Please, Killian.”
He blew out a harsh breath and reached between us, playing with my clit. I shot off without warning. My scream seemed to echo into the vast space outside.
Before I could come down from the high, Killian pulled out of me. A small whimper escaped in protest, but before I could say or do anything, his arms wrapped around me as he picked me up and walked over to one of the pool loungers. I was placed carefully on the chair. Even when he looked like this—harsh, and mean, and scowly— he was still so careful with me.
I jerked, my skin still so sensitive, and I didn’t think I had quite come back to Earth just yet. Killian stood in front of me, completely naked, his cock still hard. I swallowed and took in the angry-looking appendage.
“Spread your legs, firecracker, and show me what’s mine.”
A high, puffy sound came out of me, but I knew this wasn’t one of the times I should defy him. My ass still felt hot from all the spanks before. I bit the inside of my cheek and slowly spread my legs.
He grabbed his dick and started playing with himself, squeezing as if he was trying hard to keep from coming.
“Play with yourself,” he gritted out, stroking harder and harder still.
I hesitated.
“Don't make me repeat myself, firecracker. Play with yourself. Tease your clit. Show me what you like. What you would like me to do to you.”
Fuck. I brought my hand down between my legs, my body convulsing a bit when I touched the sensitive flesh.
“That’s it, baby girl,” Killian said, watching my hand intently and reminding me so much of that first night he came to my room at this house. “Fuck, spread your lips. I want to see how wet you are for me.”
I sucked in a sharp breath and did as he asked, using both hands. He moved his hand up and down his length faster.
“Stop,” he rasped, moving over to me. He grabbed my hands before I could pull them away and raised them above my head. “Keep your hands up. You move, and I’ll redden your ass and won’t let you come.”
“You wouldn’t!” I gasped, taking hold of the small metal bar on the top of the lounger that was holding the fabric in place. I wasn’t sure if it was his reddening my ass or his not letting me come that got me to react so strongly. I feared it might be the latter. And Killian probably knew it.
He didn’t say anything as he grabbed his cock and directed it to my entrance. I closed my eyes and groaned when he pushed in all the way, holding himself there for a moment.
I clenched around him, and he hissed out a breath of air.
“Fuck, little firecracker.”
That was all I got before he fucked me.
He grabbed my hips as he relentlessly drove in and out of me, never letting up, even when it started to feel too much. Even when tears streamed down the side of my face from the strong sensation, he kept up with the rough, quick movements. In fact, the sight of my tears seemed to put him in a sort of frenzy.
My legs moved restlessly, and I angled my hips, trying to lessen the pressure, but Killian was on top of me, trapping me between him and the lounger. He fucked me harder into the chair.
“Killian. Fuck!”
He grinned viciously at me and grabbed my hips to help slant his pelvis, changing his position inside me. My eyes rolled to the back of my head. I could feel beads of sweat falling down my skin, even as goosebumps rose. Tremors started at the small of my back. I was close to coming.
So close.
My grip tightened around the metal bar, as I pushed up, getting closer to Killian.
He pulled his hands away from my hips and slapped the side of my breast.
And that was all it took.
I came so fucking hard, all I saw for several long seconds was a dark fog. The orgasm just hit too hard, and I was left floundering, not knowing what to do with myself or how I was supposed to come out of this.
Killian shouted from above me, and he soon came as well, his cum shooting inside me and dripping onto our skin.
I clung to him.
I couldn’t help it.
“Please,” I begged. “Don’t let me go.”
“Fucking never,” came his harsh reply.
And I fucking believed him.