Chapter 12 #2
My eyes sting with tears as I picture my mom.
Dawn always had long, wispy bangs. It was a hairstyle that I associated with her and truly could never see on myself.
But in Poppy’s chair, her soft scent filling my nose, the happy sounds of music and chatter echoing through the salon, I find myself unexpectedly open to anything.
I close my eyes and nod. “I’m gonna trust you. Style, length, whatever. I trust you.”
Poppy sends me off to the shampoo bowl, where a girl named Anna gives me the head massage of my life.
I’m practically sound asleep when the water turns on, and she gets me all rinsed and ready for my cut.
After the wash, Poppy is still finishing with a customer, so she sends Anna back to dry me, and then another girl comes to give me a mini-manicure—just a nail soak, file, and cuticle trim—at the chair.
I’ve got one girl working on my hands and Anna drying my hair, and for the first time, I let myself feel hopeful.
My life was like this once. Haircuts and spa days.
Manicures, pedicures, and pretty clothes.
I can be that way again. I can become the person I know I am meant to be.
I lost my way for a short time, but I’ve learned.
I’m stronger now. I have a daughter and a purpose.
I let hope wash over me like the hot air from the dryer as Anna gets me ready.
By the time Poppy comes over to dry-cut me, my shoulders are relaxed and I’m ready for a nap. We chatter while she trims my length, taking a couple of inches off. She adds soft layers and asks me about what I plan to do once I’m all settled in the condo.
“I need a job,” I tell her. I tell her about my old job as a paralegal, and we chat about whether I would go back into the same field.
“To be honest,” I tell her, “I’d like to do something else.
I didn’t love the work when I had it, but I was happy to get a good job that paid well and had advancement.
After two years out of the workforce, I’ll take anything. ”
She nods. “I’ll have to ask my mom.”
“Ask Mom what?” Another woman sidles up to the chair and stands behind Poppy in the mirror. I can see the resemblance.
“Oh, this is perfect. Claire,” she says to me, “I’d like you to meet my sister. Her name is Clara.”
“Is this the famous Claire I’ve been hearing so much about?” Poppy’s sister sets a hand on my shoulder and gives me a squeeze through the plastic salon smock. “I’ve been telling Poppy to get you in here.”
“Nice to meet you,” I say.
While Poppy and her sister talk about their mother, I can’t help but marvel at the coincidence.
I wonder what it would be like to have a sister?
Someone to lean on instead of being alone.
Besides my mother and now Aurora, I’ve never seen my facial features on anyone else. It would be a trip, for sure.
“Would you be open to that, Claire?” Poppy asks.
I look up and meet her eyes in the mirror. I was so lost in my own thoughts, I don’t know what she said. “Sorry. Would I be open to what?” I ask.
Poppy smiles. “My mom works in local government. I’ll ask if she knows anybody who’s hiring. She knows so many people in this town, you never know.”
I physically turn and look at Poppy, my mouth wide open. “You would do that? You would ask your mom to help me find a job?”
“Don’t get your hopes up,” Clara says. “Mom can be really tough on people. She’ll want to meet you and vet you…and probably ask for a DNA sample.”
Poppy smacks her sister on the arm. “Mom’s not that bad.” She leans forward and giggles. “If you could imagine what it was like introducing Mom to Phantom.” She puts a hand over her heart. “Trust me. Mom will see what we all see in you, and she’ll bend over backward to help.”
I’m struck silent as they chat while Poppy finishes off my hair.
I don’t even know how to process this level of kindness.
I think back to what Stella said those first few days I was in the compound.
How everyone there is here for a reason.
I wonder about Stella, Tank, Phantom, and Shadow.
All the people who welcomed me in have stories of their own.
I have to imagine a woman who falls in love with a man like that was drawn to him for a reason. Yes, he’s quiet and has two incredible daughters, but I’m seeing for the first time that maybe I really am one of them. One of those people. I just happen to be at the start of my story, not the end.
By the time I look back up in the mirror, Poppy is smoothing down my hair with a beautiful hair balm that makes the new length bounce and all of it feel silky soft.
I look at myself, and I can’t stop the grin that flies across my face.
I see my mom’s long, fringed bangs but on my face.
And Poppy was right. I look fantastic. Like a completely different woman.
I jump up from the chair and pull Poppy into a hug.
“I love it,” I tell her. “For so long, I’ve looked in the mirror and seen someone who I couldn’t believe was me.
” I think back to the black eye I had when Poppy met me.
By the look on her face, I know she’s thinking about it too.
“This is the most me I think I’ve ever felt in my life. Thank you. Thank you so, so much.”
She rocks me back and forth and sniffles, no doubt fighting the same tears that I am. “You’re welcome,” she says. “Just always believe that this is you. That the you that you want to be is never far away. Sometimes you just have to look hard for her.”
We release each other, and I notice Tank hovering in the front entryway.
He nods at Holly and Daisy, but his eyes are locked on the shampoo girl, Anna.
Poppy takes off my smock, and I thank the girls for watching Aurora.
I can tell Aurora’s ready for a nap, and I’m thankful for it or I suspect she’d throw a tantrum at my taking her away from her new best friends.
The girls gather up the toys while I put Aurora back in her car seat.
“Can I tip the shampoo girl, at least?” I ask Poppy. I think it would be weird to tip Poppy when she said the services were her treat, but Anna gave me both a stellar head massage and an absolutely brilliant shampoo.
“Okay,” Poppy says thoughtfully. “You don’t have to, though. I’ll take care of her.”
“No,” I say. “Savage gave me some cash. I’d like to.”
I consider walking over to where she’s standing at the front counter looking over an iPad, but then I get another idea. I walk up to Tank, Aurora’s car carrier in my hands. “How’d it go with your lady friend?” I ask. “You got a date for the big party tonight?”
Tank grunts and shoves his hands into his pockets. “Totally friend-zoned,” he says sadly.
I put a hand on his arm. “I’m sorry, Tank. Her loss. You know that, right?”
He shrugs and holds the door open for me. I head out, but once we’re partway to the truck, I stop and pretend I forgot to tip the shampoo girl. “Oh no,” I say, putting a sad look on my face. “Tank, can you do me a huge favor?”
“Sure, doll.”
I point back at the shop and hold out my hand with a ten-dollar bill in it. “The shampoo girl, Anna. Could you run this into her? I forgot to tip her, but I want to get Aurora into the truck. If we go back in and she sees Holly and Daisy, I think she’s gonna start fussing.”
Tank nods and takes the money, but then I see him shuffle on his boots and blush as he hands Anna the tip. They talk for a few minutes before he finally heads back to the truck. I pretend I didn’t see the whole thing and act like I just finished buckling Aurora in when he climbs behind the wheel.
“Sorry to ask you to do that,” I say. “But I appreciate it.”
He is still beet red, and he has a small smile on his face. “Not a problem,” he says, then heads the truck back toward the compound.
Tank’s a good kid. Poppy’s an amazing friend. Savage is a great buddy, I guess. Whatever I have and however long it lasts, I’m thrilled that I could pay even the smallest amount forward.
A few hours later, I take one last look around my room. Everything has been packed up except one final small load that we’ll move to the condo.
My heart thuds in my chest, and I sit on the floor with Aurora for the last time. There’s a knock on my door, and I call out, “Come on in.” I haven’t locked the door in weeks. The key sits unused on one of the bedside tables.
I’m surprised when it’s Phantom who sticks his head in and nods at me.
“Phantom,” I stand up, leaving Aurora playing on the floor.
I look at the massive man in front of me and don’t know what to say.
This is goodbye, and I wouldn’t have expected him to stop by to see me.
But since he has, I feel like this is the universe giving me permission to say everything that’s been on my mind.
“I will never, ever be able to repay you.”
He holds up a hand, but I take it in mine. He looks at me, shocked. I squeeze his hand in mine, then release it, tears in my eyes. “Poppy,” I say, tears streaming down my face. “And you, Holly, and Daisy.”
I suddenly don’t have the words I thought I did. I glance up at his gruff face, and he looks a little lost. “Everything okay?” he asks quietly.
I do the only thing that I can. I have no flowery speech telling him how much their kindness, his generosity, has meant to me.
These people saved my life. I don’t know where I’d be or how I’d be if they hadn’t taken me in.
Even if Savage had bought my freedom, it was a completely different thing for these bikers and their families to take me under their wing.
I throw myself against Phantom’s chest and wrap my arms around him. “Thank you,” I say, my heart in my throat. “Thank you.”
He awkwardly pats my back.
I step back and wipe the tears from my eyes. If I’m not mistaken, I see a glimmer in his dark eyes too.
He just nods and barks, “All right.” Then he turns to leave, but he suddenly turns back. “Door’s always open,” he says, but then he flicks a look at Aurora, releases a full-face smile, and leaves.
I drop back down on the floor and stroke Aurora’s hair.
“That didn’t go the way I’d planned,” I laugh.
But with luck, the rest of the night will be just perfect.
I got a text from Val a few minutes ago confirming the time she will stop by with dinner.
Now all I need is for Savage to come get me, and this chapter of my life will close.
When Savage arrives, he’s dressed in black jeans and a black button-down shirt. He’s wearing his broken-in motorcycle boots, and he looks so gorgeous, dressed more for a date than for moving somebody in to their new place.
I grin at him.
His mouth drops open. “What did you do?” he asks.
I touch a hand to my hair, for a moment panicked that he doesn’t like it. “My haircut?” I rush out. “Poppy, she offered to give me a…”
But the words die on my lips when Savage strides over to me and touches the lengths that fall over my shoulders like he’s touching glass. “You look stunning,” he murmurs. “I thought you were beautiful before, but…” He swallows and widens his eyes. “My God, Claire.”
I throw myself at him, but this is a very different hug from the one I gave Phantom. I crush myself against him and lift my lips to his face. Our kisses are slow and deep, and they are over way too quickly.
“Let’s get you out of here.” His face is flushed, his breaths coming in as fast as mine. If things go well, maybe we can pick up where we left off later. He looks down at Aurora, composing his face into a smile. “You ready to go to your own home, little lady?”
Aurora does something then that nearly sends me to my knees. She holds her arms up to Savage. Not to me. To Savage.
He freezes and looks at me. “What should I do?”
I smile, my heart breaking into a million happy pieces. “She wants you to pick her up,” I say. “But I can do it if you’re not comfortable.”
“Are you?” he asks. “It’s okay?”
I shake my head, as if to dismiss the ridiculous thought. “Of course.” What I don’t say is that I trust him. It’s been slow coming, but I do. I trust him with my baby, and with me… Maybe not fully, but for now, it’s more than enough.