Chapter 13
THIRTEEN
Ethan
I was going to throw up. Or cry. Or throw myself on a sword. I had to face the reality that I was leaving this planet and that I’d never see Goldie again. Just the thought of it was like a knife to the gut. Any second, I was going to bleed out.
When I stepped into the clearing to see the hunk of metal that had been my escape pod, every cell in my body told me to take Goldie’s hand and run in the opposite direction. I’d pressed the signal to alert Paul this morning, so the deed was done. He was coming, and I was leaving.
She stood beside me staring up into the sky, her blue eyes darting around.
“Do you hear something?”
Her gaze flickered. “I do.”
“Then you need to go.”
She brought her chin down to meet my gaze. “I’ll wait to see you off safely.”
I shook my head. I wasn’t sure who was piloting my rescue. No way would I let anyone else get a look at her. “They can’t see you. I’ll be fine. You need to go home.”
Her body trembled as she clung to me. Her claws dug into my skin. She didn’t even notice when she broke skin, and I swallowed the pain. “Ee-than—”
“Goldie, please do this for me. I need to know that you’re nowhere near any other human males. We’re craven creatures.”
“You’re not,” she whispered.
“I’m craven too.” I tucked her hand behind her ear. The locks were like silk. “Just not with you. You changed me. Forever.”
Her breath hitched, and a whimper escaped her lips. “I don’t want you to leave.”
“I don’t either, but I can’t stay.”
“Maybe we can try—”
“Babe,” I drew her against me. “What if the Kaluma punish you for bringing me back? What if they kill me in front of you? I can’t let you go through that. Any of it.”
“Then we won’t go home.” She bared her teeth as anger seemed to take over her despair. “We’ll go live with the drubles forever. The Kaluma don’t get to control my life anymore.”
That sounded amazing, but impractical. “You have friends. You told me so. You can’t give up everything you know for me.”
“I would!” she wailed, and her words tore at me. “I would for you, Ee-than.”
I grasped her face and held her tight. “Hey, hey. Calm down for me. Please. I can’t do this when you’re upset. I can’t leave knowing you’re hurting.”
“Then don’t leave! This is killing me.” Her body bucked on sobs. Her eyes didn’t shed tears, but she grasped at me with desperate claws, raking my skin and drawing blood all over my arms and chest.
I kissed her. I didn’t know what else to do, and I wanted the taste of her in my mouth as I flew from this planet. She melted into me, and her hands stilled. Her body went lax.
I rubbed my nose along hers. “I love you like I’ve never loved anything in my life. You’ll always be it for me, Goldie. And I have to believe that we’ll meet again in another universe in another life. Our souls will know.”
She admitted defeat then. Her shoulders slumped, and she nuzzled into my neck. “You are my kotche. I’ll never take another.”
“What does kotche mean?”
“My only,” she whispered as she caressed my cheek. “My only mate.”
No, I wanted her to be loved again. The thought of her remaining alone slayed me. “Goldie—”
“I won’t.” She looked into my eyes. “And it’s okay.
You gave me what I never had. No one will take it from me.
” She took off her necklace and looped it around my head.
The heavy pendant settled on my chest like a brand.
My breath caught, and I touched it with reverence.
I should give it back. She’d made this for herself, and yet I couldn’t.
I selfishly wanted something tangible of her to take with me.
And then I heard it, the slight rumbling in the sky moments before a boom cracked the stillness. A dark object entered the atmosphere, growing steadily larger as it approached the ground. “Goldie, you have to go.”
“Ee-than!” The panic was back as her eyes rolled wildly to the sky and back to me. “Wait—”
“They can’t see you.” I shoved her away, even though the action felt like ripping my own skin off. My face was wet. I could barely see through blurry vision. An entire organ was lodged in my throat. “Hide. Whatever you do, do not come out. Do not show yourself.”
She stumbled back. Her jaw firmed as she looked up. Then back at me. Her lips parted. “I’ll find you in the stars, kotche.”
Her scales clicked, and she was gone. I could just barely make out the faint outline of her body as she ran toward the tree line and out of the clearing.
My lungs seized. My heart felt like it was grinding to a halt. I dropped to the ground on my knees and howled as the other half of my soul tore from my body. I swayed there, snot and tears and drool wetting the dirt beneath me. I was a mess. I wasn’t okay. I couldn’t go on like this.
The roar of the spaceship drew closer, and I forced myself to find some willpower to continue living.
I had to finish this. For Malcom. For myself.
For Goldie. I managed to stumble to my feet and swipe at my face.
I stared up as my rescue ship drew closer.
The air whipped around me from the braking mechanism, and I stumbled as I fought to maintain my balance.
The ship wasn’t much bigger than my rescue pod, and it landed with a thud that cratered the ground. I clung to my pack where the precious numba was stored.
“For Malcom,” I whispered to myself. I didn’t even care what happened to me anymore, but I couldn’t put my best friend at risk.
When the dust settled, a hatch opened. A ramp lowered.
And one shiny shoe stepped onto it. When Paul Holmes emerged from the pod, I jerked back.
I hadn’t expected him to take the risk of intergalactic flight.
Why the fuck was he here? I expected him to be back on Earth, waiting in luxury with his family—including a similarly rich younger brother—rather than here.
He gazed around, taking in the sky, trees, ground, and the sister planet looming in the background.
And I hated it. I hated that he was seeing any of this gorgeous planet.
Finally, he settled on me, and his eyes widened slightly at my state.
I couldn’t imagine what I looked like. Filthy.
Covered in wounds. Fresh scratches from Goldie’s claws—I shut that door in my mind.
No, no, I wouldn’t think of her now. Not in front of him.
Not in front of anyone. She was for me when I was alone.
I stepped forward and tried to remember the Ethan Hackett I’d been before I met Goldie. The man who didn’t care. Who lied and cheat and stole without remorse. “Nice landing,” I grunted.
“You’re in rough shape.” He stopped at the edge of the ramp, and two men stepped onto the ramp behind him armed with weapons.
I kept walking. “Yeah, well, I almost died approximately 476 times.”
He brought up a hand to halt me before I could get within five feet of him. I ignored him until he barked out, “Stop,” and one of the men drew his gun to point it at me.
I stopped and glared as I gripped the strap of my pack. “Nice welcome, asshole.”
“Show me the plant first. It’s your ticket off this planet. Without it, you stay here and see if you can survive the next attempt on your life.”
He was such a dick. I pulled the bag of numba out of my pack and dangled it from two fingers. “Here you go, numba. It’s potent as hell, so I wouldn’t test it.”
His eyes lit, and his head cocked, like a dog with a bone. “How so?”
“Let me on the damn ship, and I’ll tell you all about it.”
He gestured to one of the men behind him. “Get it from him.”
I quickly drew the numba behind my back. “What? Why. I’ll give it to you myself.”
“I need to make sure it’s authentic and you didn’t throw a similar plant to trick me.”
“Why the fuck would I trick you?”
“Because you’re a con man and a thief, Hackett.”
Okay, rude. “I’m on an alien planet. Why would I search for a similar plant just to fuck you over? Think this through, Holmes.”
But the bodyguard was already advancing toward me. Goosebumps erupted on my skin. Alarm bells rang in my head. Holmes’s accusation seemed irrational and weird.
I took a step back and slipped my hand up my shoulder to reach for my gun holstered at my back. An uneasy feeling settled in my gut. What if Holmes never intended to take me back?
“Look, Holmes,” I kept walking back, even as the bodyguard advancing on me, gun drawn. “We had an agreement, so I don’t understand—”
“Shut up,” he snarled. “Fuck it. Smythe, just shoot him and grab the plant.”
My stomach dropped. I saw the second Smythe’s forearm tensed to squeeze the trigger.
I drew my gun, but it was a second too late.
A bullet whizzed past my head. I fired, catching Smythe in the side with a laser blast. He screamed as he went to the ground, clutching his ribs, as the smell of burning flesh filled the clearing.
“Kill him!” Holmes roared as a group of more men, too many to count quickly—how had they all fit in that clown car of a pod?—ran down the ramp with clattering footsteps. Bullets flew. Pain tore through my calf, and I went down like sack of potatoes.
This was it. This was where it all ended, on an alien planet with the taste of her in my mouth. I hoped she was far away, that my body would decay without her ever knowing I never made it back home. Pain slammed into my shoulder. Another bullet.
I thought of her. The silk of her hair, the smooth glide of her scales. Her voice and her big blue eyes, and the perfect way her fingers linked with mine.
Anger surged through me along with a rush of adrenaline.
No, I had to fight. I had to do something.
I had to take out as many men as I could before they killed me, so they couldn’t do any damage to this precious planet that was Goldie’s home.
Because humans ruined everything, especially men.
Their bodies would rot here alongside mine.
If this was my grave, then it was theirs too.