Chapter 15
FIFTEEN
Ethan
I was so warm. Pain lurked somewhere but it was dulled and tolerable. My face rested on something soft that smelled like maple syrup. I didn’t want to move. Ever.
Voices filtered through the haze of fading sleep.
Goldie.
“…he tried to send me away many times,” she was saying. “I refused.”
“Probably because he knew you were too good to leave him,” Sherif grunted. “He gave you an illusion of a choice.”
“If you want to think that, I can’t change your mind,” Goldie said. “But you weren’t there. He pleaded with me to leave him.”
“Sherif,” Zuri said. “She’s right. You weren’t there.”
“Now you’re defending him? You’re the one who told us he’s untrustworthy.”
“I spoke the truth about his past,” she corrected. “But I’m also an emotionally intelligent adult who can change her opinion about someone with new information. I’m choosing to trust Hara.”
I opened my eyes to find my cage once again surrounded by a grouping of four warriors, along with two more human females I hadn’t seen yet. A woman who stood with her arms crossed next to the alien with the bat, and another next to the guy with the eye patch.
I felt like a zoo animal.
My pillow moved. Goldie’s fingers grazed my chin. “Are you awake?”
“Yeah, but don’t make me move,” I nuzzled against her warm stomach. “I like it here.”
She laughed softly.
“Have you mated?” Sherif’s sharp question sliced through the air like one of his swords.
Goldie immediately stiffened, and I came up swinging.
I jerked from her lap to a sitting position and slammed my palm against the bars of the cage.
“None of your business, motherfucker. After what she’s been through, you’re an asshole for asking that.
” I turned my wrath to Zuri, who watched me with a clenched jaw.
“This is what you chose on this planet? You used free will to be with this dick?”
“Watch it,” Zuri warned, voice tight. “I know you’re pissed, but there’s a lot of history here you’re missing. You don’t know what these warriors went through—”
“The only history I care about is what happened to Goldie. I don’t give a fuck about him,” I pointed at all the Kaluma warriors with a shaky finger. “Or him, or him, or anyone here except her.” I reached behind me until I felt Goldie’s fingers in mine.
“Don’t yell at Zuri,” Goldie spoke softly behind me. Her voice trembled. “It’s not her fault what happened.”
I pulled her next to me. “No, but she’s making excuses for him.”
Goldie ducked her head and gave one single nod.
Zuri made a strangled sound. “Oh no, Hara. No, I don’t want to make excuses for them.” She exhaled slowly. “Is that how we’ve made you feel?”
Goldie lifted her head slowly, but she didn’t look at Zuri. She looked right at Sherif. “Ee-than told me what happened wasn’t my fault.” Her fingers squeezed mine as her voice shook. “No one… no one told me that before.”
Zuri placed a hand over her mouth. Her eyes grew wet.
Sherif went to a crouch, his big body seeming to curl into itself. He looked… shamed. I wouldn’t have expected him to be able to feel that emotion. “I’m sorry, Hara. He’s right. What happened to you and the other females… we will all carry that guilt for the rest of our lives.”
“I felt pressure to get over it quickly,” Goldie spoke. “Some of the other females seemed to, and I couldn’t. The thought of being touched repulsed me.”
“Hara,” Bloom whispered as she knelt next to where Zuri sat cross-legged. “Oh honey.”
“I suppressed how I felt and kept it to myself to spare you warriors from feeling guilt. It seemed… your feelings mattered more than mine.”
Bosa bowed his head. Cravus went to one knee next to his Bloom. But Sherif didn’t look away from Goldie. Not once. He held her gaze. And even though I didn’t want to give him an ounce of credit, I thought in that moment he showed her utmost respect. He didn’t cut her off and make excuses.
“Everyone was happy,” Goldie continued, her voice cracking. “We were growing. I didn’t want to be the one who was stuck in the past, but I couldn’t help it. The entire village felt like it was moving on except me. So I had to be wrong, right? This had to be my fault.”
“No,” Sherif’s voice was deep. “You’re not wrong. And it’s not your fault. And I am ashamed we made you feel that way.”
“Ee-than made me feel right,” she insisted. “You will not take him from me. If you do, you’ll lose me too. And you’ll have been wrong. Not me.”
“I don’t want to lose you.” Sherif fisted his clawed hands at his sides. “But I have a whole village to think about. What if he has signaled another ship to arrive, and they attack us?”
I rolled my eyes. “I don’t—”
Goldie silenced me with a hand on my arm. “He doesn’t.”
“How do you know?” he asked.
“Because my visuls have shown me happiness with him at my side. He’s my kotche. I’ve seen it.”
“Will you wear a collar with his matz?” He pointed to my tattoos.
I laughed before she could answer. “No, I got these when I was like twenty-one. They don’t mean anything. Goldie told me she made this necklace to claim herself. I’ll wear a matching one. I’m hers.” I shrugged. “If we were married on Earth, I’d take her name.”
Zuri’s nose wrinkled. “Okay, we get the point, Hackett.” She rolled her eyes. “Really, Hara. A whole damn planet of human men and you choose this one? He’s a five at best.”
My jaw dropped. “Excuse me? I’m at least a seven and a half on my worst day.”
“I don’t know what this means,” Goldie said, her gaze darting between the two of us.
I leaned against her and stuck my lip out. “Zuri called me ugly.”
Goldie’s eyes went big. “He’s not. He’s the most handsome.”
I grinned at Zuri and stuck my tongue out.
She threw up her hands and turned to Bloom. “I might murder him before Sherif does.”
“I’d like to get out of this cage now,” Goldie said. “Even if it’s to leave together.”
“You’re not leaving,” Sherif said.
I narrowed my eyes at him. “You’re just saying that because she’s your best healer.”
“No, I’m saying that because she’s a valued member of this village,” he snapped back. He grabbed the lock on the cage and ripped it off with one swipe of his thick arm. The door swung open from the force.
Feeling intimidated for the hundredth time as a weak human, I stared at him. “Fuck.”
Zuri crossed her arms over her chest. “And this whole village is filled with more like him. So fuck around and find out, you get me?”
Goldie rose to her feet, and I stood next to her, favoring my injured calf. “So?” Goldie asked.
“So he can stay. But as Zuri said, he cannot find out or he gets fucked.”
Zuri pinched the bridge of her nose. “That’s not…” she waved a hand. “Whatever. Ethan gets it right?”
I saluted her. “Loud and clear.”
Hara
Ethan limped beside me with the blanket knotted around the waist. By now, the entire village had stopped whatever they were doing and lined the path leading to our dwellings to watch us.
Ethan met the gazes of the Kaluma males head-on, likely so he didn’t appear weak.
Yet his hand trembled in mine. I couldn’t tell if it was nerves or pain or a little bit of both.
He said he’d wear my matz markings. I hadn’t realized how badly I had wanted that until he said it.
I needed him in my vinus where I could feed him and check over his wounds again.
Gaining access to the fungi platform where my vinus resided proved difficult.
The stairs were long, winding, and steep.
We had to climb a few vines as well. Ethan managed it all, refusing even my help, but by the time we reached my vinus, he was pale, sweating, and looked ready to pass out again.
I tugged aside the vines to see Wensla had dropped off supplies—some hastily mended pants for Ethan, a tall vase of water, and food.
Ethan glanced around my space, and I wondered what he thought of it.
He exhaled as he fluttered his fingers along the walls and patted the soft furs of my bed pallet.
He sank down on the edge and blinked up at me.
“I saw this. In my dream.” He pointed to the small carvings on my shelf.
“That was there. This fur.” He dug his fingers into the plush fibers. “You. You were here, Goldie. I saw it.”
I pushed gently on his shoulder until he lay flat on his back. He reached for me. “This was always meant to happen, right?”
“When you first appeared in my visuls, I didn’t want to believe what that meant.”
“What did it mean?”
“That you were my linyx. My promised mate.”
I untied the blanked to reveal his nude, pale form.
I began my systematic check of his body, and while his cock jerked a few times, he mostly remained soft, which let me know the amount of pain he was in.
His shoulder and calf wounds were less inflamed thanks to the paste I applied. He needed time to heal now.
His eyes watched me. “This feels unreal. That we’re here at your home. That I somehow still have my head attached to my body.”
I frowned. “They won’t hurt you.”
“They’re terrifying, Goldie. You didn’t properly prepare me for how utterly massive and strong they are. I thought they’d be like you with more muscles.” He pointed to the wall. “Those males out there could rip my limbs off without breaking a sweat.”
“And then I’d rip off theirs,” I said.
He grinned. “My sweet protector.” He bent an arm and placed his hand behind his head. “As soon as I’m healed, I’ll get stronger. I’ll never be them, but I’ll get as close as this human body is able.”
“The warriors train every day.”
“Of course they do. Like Spartans.”
I didn’t know what Spartans were.
“Goldie, you gotta stop fussing over me. You were shot in the damn chest, which I’m still pissed at you about. Lay down.”
My chest did ache. The muscles were tense. I pulled the blanket back up to Ethan’s waist just as the vine’s in my doorway parted and Rilee stepped through.
“Hara,” she whispered, eyes wide and lips parted. “Oh Hara, I thought you were dead.”
I stood and wrapped my arms around her. “I’m sorry I worried you.”
She slapped me lightly. “Don’t do it again.”