6. Lucas
6
Lucas
I stare in disbelief as I watch Sienna being kissed by some strange guy. His hands are all over her, and shes not pushing him away. A searing pain rips through my chest as the voices in my head start whispering their familiar taunts.
Shes just like the others, Lucas. She never really cared about you. A young, beautiful woman like her? You really thought shed stick around an old bastard like you?
I clench my fists, fighting back the anger and hurt threatening to consume me. Turning on my heel, I storm out, needing to get away before I do something Ill regret.
The crisp night air hits my face as I exit the bar, but it does little to cool the burning jealousy coursing through my veins. My phone vibrates in my pocket, and I already know its Sienna calling. Part of me wants to answer, to hear her explanation, but the voices are too loud, too insistent.
Shell just feed you more lies. When are you going to learn?
I ignore the call and slide the phone back into my pocket. Maybe this was for the best. Maybe I was never meant to have this kind of happiness, this kind of connection. Im better off alone, like Ive always been.
As I make my way to my car, the image of Sienna and that man taunts me with what I can never truly have. The fear of abandonment, the constant worry that shell leave me for someone younger, someone better, has been lurking in the shadows of my mind from the moment she entered my life.
I know I shouldnt think like this, but maybe Im not meant for this. Maybe Im destined to be alone, to protect myself from the inevitable hurt that comes with opening your heart.
Without any care about where Im going, I just drive for the next few hours, finally giving up and heading home.
As I pull into my driveway and step out of the car, I see Sienna, huddled on the front steps still wearing the black dress. .
She looks up as I approach, relief floods her face. "Lucas! Thank god youre home."
I stop in front of her, shrugging off my coat wordlessly and draping it over her shivering shoulders. She clutches at it gratefully as I unlock the front door.
"Come on, lets get you inside where its warm," I avoid looking into her pleading eyes.
Once were in the kitchen, I busily prepare two mugs of tea, hyperaware of Siennas presence behind me. The silence hangs heavy between us.
I hear her soft footsteps before her arms wrap around me from behind. I stiffen briefly before forcing myself to relax into her embrace.
"David is my ex-fiance," she says quietly. "I hadnt seen him since he left me years ago. I dont know how he found me tonight, but I swear theres nothing between us anymore."
Her grip tightens, her breath warm against my back.
"You have to believe me, Lucas. I would never hurt you like that. What we have...it means everything to me." Her voice breaks on the last word.
I turn around slowly, my hands coming up to cradle Siennas face. Her eyes are shimmering with unshed tears, and I feel a pang of guilt for causing her such distress.
"I believe you," I murmur, stroking her cheek with my thumb. "But you have to understand the thought of losing you..." I trail off, unable to give voice to the fear thats been gnawing at me.
Siennas gaze is unwavering, filled with an intensity that takes my breath away. "Youre not going to lose me, Lucas. Not unless you push me away."
I let out a shaky breath, resting my forehead against hers. "I dont want to push you away. But the idea of you leaving, of finding someone younger, someone better..." The words tumble out before I can stop them, laying bare the insecurities that have plagued me for so long.
"Hey," Siennas voice is gentle but firm. "Look at me." I meet her gaze reluctantly, bracing myself for the rejection Im sure is coming.
But instead, her eyes are filled with a tenderness that steals the breath from my lungs. "I dont want anyone else. I want you, Lucas. All of you."
I search her face, looking for any sign of deception, but all I see is raw honesty. A weight lifts from my shoulders, and I smile for the first time tonight.
"If you want out, you need to tell me," I say, Because Im all in, Sienna. You and Lily have become my world."
Siennas answering smile is radiant, and she loops her arms around my neck. "Im not going anywhere," she whispers, her lips a breath away from mine. "Im yours, Lucas. For as long as youll have me."
The relief that courses through me is staggering, and I waste no more time in closing the distance between us. Our kiss is searing, a desperate clash of lips and tongues, pouring out all the pent-up emotions of the night.
When we finally break apart, breathless and flushed, I hold Sienna close, reveling in the warmth and solidity of her in my arms.
"Im sorry I doubted you," I murmur into the soft skin of her neck.
Sienna pulls back just enough to look me in the eye. "We all have our demons, Lucas. But well face them together, you and me. Thats what love is."
THE END