4. Chapter Four
Chapter Four
Jack
I wait for Emma on my front porch, my stomach bursting with excitement.
I was awake before the sun came up this morning. An energy streaming through my blood like I haven’t felt in years. Gathering her breakfast from the berry patch, fetching the freshest eggs to give her proper nutrients, cooking it all up and sharing it with her.
It’s the perfect morning.
Right up until that moment. Those glossy lips looked so damn tempting, I had to turn away. What the hell was I thinking? The way my old shirt hung off her body, doing nothing to hide the delicate shape of her curves. Fuck, then she went and grabbed my hand. I could just devour her, throw her over my shoulder and spend all day making love to her in my cabin.
I can’t be thinking like this.
I have to get outside, out of the cabin so I don’t give in.
Eventually Emma joins me, and I lead the way up the trail. Georgie is happily trotting up the mountain in front of us, sniffing the forest floor as we wind up the steep incline. I take my time, helping Emma up a few rough bits of slippery rocks and by the time we get to the top, we’re both huffing and puffing.
“Come over this way,” I tell Emma, guiding her to my favorite spot.
I watch as her eyes light up. The richness of her blue gaze sparkles as she smiles at the view. Miles and miles of mountains stretch out as far as you can see, the rough terrain drenched in forests, hidden lakes and secret locations of Misty Peaks.
“It’s beautiful,” Emma says, long blond hair flowing in the breeze.
I don’t take my eyes off her when I say, “Sure is.”
“We’ll go back down this trail,” I step across to a path well worn. “It’ll take us back to my old cabin. The one in your picture.”
“I would love to see that, thank you.”
We stop for a break, sharing a snack and swapping stories. I learn more about Emma’s life in the city, and how tough she’s had it since her parents died. I cringe at the thought of her feeling so unsafe every day. I fought so damn hard to make sure this country was safe for everyone, and hearing that our own people are making life a misery for others makes my blood boil.
“You should move to the mountains,” I say eventually, holding out the last chocolate chip cookie for Emma. “it suits you, and you really seem to love it.”
She takes the cookie and scoffs. “And what would I do for work?”
I shrug. “Just live on the land, like I do.”
“I need to earn a living, Jack. I’m qualified for nothing, and that includes living like you do.”
I lean back on my palms and watch as a flock of birds swoop down on a ledge below.
“At least you’d be safe,” I grunt, locking eyes with her. “The city isn’t a good place for you. Come out here, enjoy nature and everything else will sort itself out.”
She looks off in the distance, deep in thought. “Mom always said she’d like to live by the beach…”
I shake my head, my nose turning in disgust. “Fuck that. Too much sand for me.”
Emma turns around, her mouth agape with joy. “That’s what I always said!”
We laugh together and joke about sand going to places it’s not invited. Emma loses herself, doubled over in laughter when I tell her a story about the time I surprised her father with a handful of sand shoved down his military slacks.
I can’t help but smile when she swipes away a tear of joy, her laughter slowly settling down. That sweet mouth catches my gaze, and I slide my tongue across my lips.
Like a starved animal, I need it. Need her .
The conversation deepens and we imagine a new life for Emma on the mountain as we hike back down. I can’t help but watch the curve of her ass jiggle in the jeans I collected from Misty Peaks this morning. I can hear the smile in her voice as we walk and talk, her sweet tone echoing off the trees, making my heart pound hard inside my chest.
She’s starting to live inside her dream. My dream . The dream of having her here with me on the mountain.
She’s stopped at the edge of a fork in the path, turning to face me. Tiny beads of sweat make me want to reach out and dry her forehead, so I shove my hands deeper into my pockets.
“Okay. So I’ve got a job at the bar, you’ve fixed up my car and I go for a jog along these beautiful trails every morning…” She ticks off the list of her imaginary life with her fingers, pausing on the path to catch some air. “There’s just one thing missing.”
“Oh yeah,” I say, pressing my hands to my hips. “What’s that?”
Me. I’m the thing missing from your life.
“I have nowhere to live. You have to build me a cabin.”
“No.”
“No?” Emma says. “I’m not sleeping in the forest, Mr. Navy SEAL. You can keep that for yourself.”
I chuckle and hold my arm out, gesturing down the pathway.
“That’s not what I’m saying.” I step forward, boots crunching on the path. “I’m saying I don’t have to build you a cabin because you can have this one.”
The clearing surrounding my old cabin is moist from the morning mist, the old logs laying around covered in overgrowth. We move in closer to see the old wooden structure has green moss creeping up the sides, and some of the panels on the siding have fallen off and rotted.
“Oh, Jack,” Emma slides in beside me, her arm looping through mine to link together. “It’s the cabin from my photo.”
I nod and clench my jaw. She’s standing so damn close, her warm arm locked in mine as we move around the cabin.
“It’s like a dream, seeing this.” Emma bounces up and down, her mouth open with amazement at the derelict old structure. “I’ve stared at the photo so many times, Jack. It’s… it’s… it’s like they’re here with me.”
She falls back on her heels, emotion moving across her pretty face.
“Thank you for bringing me here,” she says.
“Anything for you.”
I step forward and grab Emma by the shoulders. I set her up in the exact spot her parents stood, holding the woman before my eyes, over twenty years ago.
Like a shock to my heart, my palms heat at the slightest touch of Emma’s body. I manage to keep her steady and breathe in her floral scent as she bats her long lashes, peering up at me as I move her to the exact right spot.
“Stand there and show me that gorgeous smile.” I open my camera app and take the photo. “All grown up... beautiful .”
Emma skips back to me and clings onto my shoulder as I show her the photo. She swoons adoringly as her flowing hair covers my face, encasing me in her sweet natural perfume. I bite down on my jaw. Fuck.
I feel my teeth grind together, my hands shaking with the temptation to grab her and slam my mouth on hers.
She spins around, smiling as she grabs both my arms. I’m fucking biting the inside of my cheek, trying to fight this.
“Would you really let me live here?”
She slides her hands down my forearms and lifts my hands out of my jeans to clutch them. My heart starts to race, fucking pounding as she looks up at me with those big, beautiful eyes.
“No. I changed my mind.”
She moves in closer, giggling and flashing those eyes up at me. Her breasts are pressing against my stomach now she’s that damn close. What the hell is she doing?
“Oh, is that right?”
She’s killing me, but she doesn’t care.
“Did you think of somewhere better I can live?” Her eyes drop to my lips. “Somewhere… closer ?”
I go to step away, but her grip tightens on my hands. She stares at me, lust-filled eyes begging me to stay.
“Emma,” I breathe, my voice barely escaping my mouth. “We can’t do this.”
She leans in closer, her lips almost touching mine. “We can.”
Her words hit my lips and I taste her. I taste her breath in my mouth. I taste her innocence and beauty. It’s all there, right in front of me. I can just take everything my body so desperately desires right now. Right fucking now.
Kiss her. Kiss her.
I take a breath and summon every ounce of discipline I didn’t know still existed in my cold, dark veins. My military training comes out and I fight back against the demons in my head.
“Ryan was my best friend. He gave his life for me, for us. I can’t do this to him, I can’t repay him by going behind his back. You’re off-limits, no matter what happens.”
“I’m not a kid anymore, I can make my own choices,” Emma says, not budging. She leans up on her toes so her soft mouth presses against my ear. “I want you, Jack. With every second I spend with you, I want you more. I want your touch. I want your hands on me.”
My head rolls back on my neck and her hand slides down my stomach. She presses a kiss to my earlobe, slowly moving her mouth down my neck, kissing up my cheek until she’s right near my mouth.
“Fuck,” I breathe.
It’s everything I want. Goddammit. What the hell do I do?
“But Ryan…”
I lose any chance of fighting when Emma’s mouth slides across mine. I close my eyes and groan at the gentle caress. Those luscious lips part and her tongue slides inside my mouth. My hands go to her sides, and we open for each other, our tongues colliding like a vicious fire has just detonated.
Only I can’t do this.
She’s Ryan’s daughter.
No matter how badly I want it, it would be wrong.
I break the kiss and take a big step back. We’re both panting, breathless from the passion that’s boiled over. I stare at Emma, her blue eyes wide with desire. I force myself to look away, if I don’t, I might never forgive myself.
“Let’s get back to my cabin. Now.”
I turn around before I change my mind. I served in the military for two decades, risking my life and going to battle with some of the world’s most dangerous criminals.
But this…
Turning my back on the most beautiful woman in the world is the damned hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
***
I stretch out on the floor and feel myself slowly drift to sleep as I stare at the flames flickering in the fire. I’m reminded of my military days. We would spend hours sitting by the fire, guns at the ready, always alert.
My mind drifts back to earlier today.
The kiss with Emma. It was almost the perfect moment, at least, up until the part where I pulled away and growled at her. She was so soft, her lips tasting like pure heaven. Everything about her is perfect, too fucking perfect.
I regret the way I handled myself up there. I didn’t want to hurt her. I’m trying to protect her, to keep her from making an awful mistake.
She doesn’t want me, she’s just wounded. She’s looking for safety, for someone to trust.
And I can’t just take advantage of that. I won’t.
I wriggle my aching body on the hard floor, trying my best to get comfortable. I’m not about to tell Emma this, but sleeping out here is killing me.
Georgie is snoring like a trooper, her head laying across my feet. I watch her chest rise and fall, thinking about the woman sleeping in soundly in my bed. She’s safe.
Slowly, I drift off to sleep.
I’m not sure how long I’m asleep before I’m woken abruptly by the blistering sound of a firecracker. I shoot up straight, my heart pounding as I look around. I’m not on the floor of my cabin though. No, the forest is thick here, and dark shadows are looming beyond their depths.
I grab my gun and cock it, ready to fire.
Then I hear the screaming. The enemy is all around us, we’re swarmed. A blast shatters my ears and I duck for cover, my arms gripping my head. Bullets rain down on me, whistling past my head as I hold my helmet firmly in place, praying to God that I’ll survive.
Another blast heats my entire body, a roasting warmth engulfing me. My skin singes as I crawl away from the fireball behind me. My gun is somewhere, where is it? Where is it?!
I feel around for it, but the screams are getting louder.
“Ryan!”
I look around for my comrade. The flames are growing bigger. Then I see him, standing in the flames, his body completely black, all except the whites of his eyes which are staring right at me. He falls to the ground, a heavy lifeless lump collapsing before my eyes.
“RYAN!”
I jump to my feet and toss my pack behind me. Staring into the fire, tears fizzle on my face, the heat too much to bear. Bullets ricochet on the surrounding trees, barely missing me as I try to fight against the growing flames.
“Jack! Wake up!”
No. NO. My friend is in there. My best friend. I need to get to him. He can’t die.
“Jack! Jack, wake up, Jack !”
I clutch my chest, my heart painfully constricted as I gasp for air. Stunning blue eyes meet mine, two hands holding my head steady as I gaze into Emma’s eyes.
“Jack, it’s ok… I’m here.” She holds my head to her chest. “You’re ok. You’re safe.”
My body is shaking, sweat streaming out of every pore.
Emma pulls my face to hers and kisses my forehead. I feel my blood begin to settle as she holds me, nursing me back until I feel my soul settle back on the floor of my cabin.
“Safe… You’re safe, Jack.”