Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
LYLA
“ W hat are you doing?” I grip the phone in my hand as I watch him turn on the shower. Surely, he won’t shower while I’m on the phone with him.
“I’m going to take a quick shower before bed.” He removes his shoes before lifting his shirt over his head. I stare at his broad chest, unable to look away. He’s even more beautiful than I remember as I trace the black ink with my eyes. His hands move to the buckle of his pants, and my eyes widen.
“I should let you go so you can have your privacy,” I stutter in disbelief as his zipper lowers.
“I’m not ready to say goodbye yet, so I thought I would keep you on the line. I don’t need the privacy, but if you feel uncomfortable, I can turn the phone.” His lips turn up in a smirk, almost as if he’s daring me to keep watching.
Curiosity could very well be my downfall as I meet the dare head-on and shake my head. “I’m good. Do what you need to do. I’ll wash my face and get ready for bed, too.” I enter the bathroom and prop him up on the sink.
“Perfect,” he grins, stepping out of his pants, leaving him in a pair of black boxer briefs .
Good lord. I try not to stare, but it’s like a force is holding me in place. I hungrily take him in, wanting to memorize every little detail to hold onto later. He’s fully straining against the front now, and I flick my eyes up to meet smoldering greys.
“I’m going to apologize in advance. You are making me so fucking hard right now with the way you are looking at me. I won’t be able to hide it, so if you aren’t ready to see how much I want you, now is a good time to look away.”
I swallow hard and meet his gaze. Part of me knows I shouldn’t keep crossing the line and wanting what I can’t have. The other half is addicted to how he makes me feel and curious about what he can teach me.
“I’m good,” I whisper, ignoring the voices in my head that are telling me to run.
His jaw ticks with tension as his body strains against the black fabric. He frees himself, and I grip the countertop for support as he stands fully naked before me. A familiar ache from this afternoon seeps in as my body reacts to the sight of him. He put the one guy I’ve been with to shame. I never knew they could get this big, let alone be able to fit inside a woman.
A deep growl comes from his lips, and I watch, fascinated, as he circles his hand around himself and strokes down. His eyes burn into me, and I’ve never been more turned on than I am right now. I can feel my panties get wet as a deep throb pulses between my legs.
“This is how you affect me, Lyla, with just one glance. Don’t ever doubt the power you have to bring a man to his knees. One day soon, I will show you how it feels to be with a man who puts your needs first. You deserve to be worshipped, and I pray to God that I’m the lucky guy who gets the honor of doing it.”
He turns and steps into the shower, putting a veil of steam between us. Placing a hand to my chest, I press my thighs together and try to get ahold of all these new feelings invading my body.
With a shaky hand, I grab my toothbrush and brush my teeth before washing my face quickly. I hear the shower turn off minutes later and glance down at my phone just as he wraps a towel around his waist.
His wet hair drips onto his chest, and I follow the water droplets as they disappear into the towel hanging low on his hips. He roughly runs another towel over his head before throwing it on the sink.
I watch him brush his teeth as I turn off the bathroom light and crawl into bed. I’m surrounded by darkness except for the glow of my phone. He turns off the bathroom light, and I hear the towel drop before he settles into bed. Just the thought of him lying there naked causes a deep pull in my core.
I hear his breathing on the other end of the phone, matching my own as we struggle with this insane force between us. I can barely make out his features, but I can tell his eyes are hooded as he leans his head further back into the pillow, exposing his throat to me.
“Lyla,” he says quietly in a strained voice.
“Yes,” I whisper.
“What are you feeling right now?”
I’m caught off guard by the question and try to think of what to say.
“Don’t overthink it, Lyla,” he says quietly, reading my mind. “Just tell me what you’re feeling at this exact moment.”
“I’m…” I close my eyes and let myself feel my emotions. “I feel scared and alive at the same time.”
“What are you scared of?”
“Everything,” I whisper. “Of how you make me feel when I’m around you…how I don’t trust myself to stay away from you li ke I should. I don’t want to pull you into my mess and hurt you,” I admit.
“I can handle any mess you throw my way. I’m already in too deep, Lyla, so you’re off the hook with feeling scared for me. It’s my choice to get involved, and when you are ready to talk to me, it’s my choice to stay by your side. There’s no doubt in my mind that if you tried to run now…I would catch you.”
I grip the sheet as emotions slam into me. I’m already in too deep, as well, and I can feel myself teetering on the edge of falling.
“Now that we have the scared feeling taken care of, what are you feeling that makes you feel alive?” His voice filters through the dark, wrapping me in its warmth.
“You make me feel things I’ve never felt before,” I confess softly. “My body feels things that I’ve never experienced before.”
His breath hitches, and I press a hand on my stomach as the pull becomes stronger.
“Tell me how your body feels now. Describe it.”
Feeling grateful I’m in the dark so he can’t see my red face, I take a deep breath and gather my nerve. “I felt an ache between my legs when I watched you get in the shower. My stomach is tight like my body is being pulled in your direction.”
“Do you still have that ache?” His voice is low, and I can feel the electric energy in the air between us.
“Yes,” I say softly.
“Do you want me to take it away for you?” He asks so quietly that I struggle to make out the words.
“Yes,” I utter the single word into the air and hold my breath. I’ve never been this brave before, but I want to be brave…for him.
“Take off your clothes. I want you bare for me,” he demands softly .
I place my phone on the bed and remove my dad’s worn-out t-shirt and my underwear. The sheets are cool against my skin as I settle back down.
“Are you naked?”
“Mm-hm.” The cool air hits my nipples immediately, causing them to harden. “Don’t be upset if this doesn’t work. I don’t know if I’ll be able to without you physically touching me.”
“It’s going to work, little hummingbird…trust me,” he softly laughs. “I’ll get you there, I promise.”
I keep my phone lying on the bed and focus on his voice as I close my eyes.
“I want you to touch yourself for me. Tell me how wet you are,” his deep voice sends tingles throughout my body as I lower my hand down my stomach until I reach between my legs. When my fingers rub over my clit, a small moan escapes before I can stop it. Every nerve ending is lit, and I feel my arousal coat the tips of my fingers.
“Tell me,” he whispers with a growl.
“I’m soaking wet,” I manage to get out as I palm myself, feeling the ache get stronger.
“Fuck, Lyla,” he grounds out. I hear the strain in his voice, and it secretly pleases me that I can make this beautiful man fight to stay in control. “I’ve never been so hard in my life than I am right now. I have my hand around my cock, and I’m imagining it's your grip that's sliding down on me,” he groans, and that sound alone has me lifting my hips slightly and rubbing harder on my swollen bud. “Push two fingers in that sweet pussy of yours. Feel how amazing your body feels. It’s perfection, Lyla, and a gift to be treasured.”
I slide two fingers in as his words flow over me. I’m immediately enveloped in my warmth as I lift my hips to go deeper. “Jake,” I moan out as I set a pace that has me fisting the sheet and throwing my head back at the sensations coming at me.
“I’m right here, my little hummingbird. I feel it, too. My dick is throbbing in my hand just picturing you touching yourself.” I hear the sounds of his movements as he sets a faster pace, sending a frantic need shooting through me as I match his rhythm. “Touch one of those beautiful breasts for me with your other hand. I want you to squeeze it hard before pinching your nipple.”
I snake my other hand up and grasp my breast before finding my nipple. I pinch it, and desire rushes to my core. A soft cry escapes as I feel myself on the edge of letting go.
“I’m so close, Jake,” I pant and rub my clit harder.
“I’m right there with you, beautiful. You have no idea how much I want to be buried inside you right now. I’m going to show you how good we fit together, and there won’t be a single doubt in your mind about who your pussy wants to belong to when I’m through with you,” he breathes.
His words do their job, and my body surrenders to him. I cry out his name as my body ignites and explodes into a million tiny pieces. I hear my name in the distance as a deep moan vibrates out of his body. My fingers are squeezed tightly as I pulse with each wave of pleasure. I see stars behind my eyelids as I arch my back and strain against the pillow.
When I finally come back to my surroundings, our pants are the only thing to be heard in the silence. I remove my hand and curl up on my side, fighting a smile that wants to escape.
Hearing my name on his lips when his body finally let go is something I will never forget. Even in the darkness, I know I just witnessed the most beautiful sight I’ve ever seen.
“My God, Lyla,” he rasps, breaking the silence. “I’ve never cum that hard in my life, and you didn’t even touch me. Jesus. You are either going to kill me at some point or make me some crazed sex addict who is addicted to what you make me feel.”
I giggle into my pillow, feeling like a giddy teenager for the first time in my life. He makes me want to forget all the bad things that have ever happened to me.
I reach for my phone and prop it on the pillow beside me. The light illuminates his face as I watch him discard the towel he must have retrieved from the floor.
“Thank you,” I whisper.
He lies down and props me up, too, so we are facing each other.
“For what? I feel like I should be thanking you,” he grins.
“For reminding me that I can still feel happy. It’s been a very long time since I’ve felt it.”
“How long?” He asks softly.
“Since the morning of my tenth birthday,” I whisper, deciding to let him in just a little bit more. “I was so excited because we were going to an amusement park that day. My mom had made my favorite banana chocolate chip pancakes that she did every year for my birthday, and we had just finished eating breakfast.”
I grip the sheet tightly to my chest as memories come flooding back to the worst day of my life. “My dad was just supposed to drive to work and grab some paperwork from his office before coming back home and taking us to the park, but he never made it back.”
I shut my eyes as tears threaten to spill. Horrible images of my mom screaming when she got the phone call enter my mind. It was like nothing I had ever heard, and it still haunts me most nights. The sounds coming from her lips didn’t sound human and were so gut-wrenching that I felt it deep in my bones. What I didn’t know at the time was I lost two parents that day as I watched my mom collapse onto the kitchen floor.
“Fuck, baby. I’m so sorry,” he says in a pained voice. “What happened?”
I wipe my eyes and stuff my emotions back down where it doesn’t hurt as bad. “He worked at a bank, and someone came in to rob the place. I learned later that the guy was high on something, and nothing my dad could have said to him would have talked him down off the ledge. He grabbed one of the young cashiers and held a gun to her head, demanding money. She was a young mother to a two-year-old, and my father told him if he let her go, he would take him to the safe where he could get more money than what the cashier had in her drawer. He released the girl and held the gun to my dad instead. When my dad knew she was safe, he jumped the guy and managed to get his gun out of his hand…what he didn’t expect was the knife the guy had hidden in his jacket. My dad died instantly when it pierced his gut. After that, the guy freaked out and fled. The cops found him later and arrested him.”
“Jesus, Lyla. I can’t imagine what you went through.”
“I envied that little girl for so long,” I admit quietly. “She got to keep both her parents because my dad risked his life to save her mom when I lost both that day.”
“Both?” He asks, confused. “Your mom died too?”
“She might as well have died that day. It’s like a switch went off inside her so she wouldn’t have to feel the pain. No matter how hard I tried, I could never turn it back on.”
He runs a hand roughly over his face, and I hear him take a deep breath. “You were only ten,” he says bitterly. “You should have been riding bikes and eating ice cream—instead, you were living through hell.” I meet his eyes briefly but quickly look away when I see too much in them. I’m afraid if I stare too long, I’ll never want to let go.
“Did it ever get better?” His question breaks through my thoughts .
“She learned to walk through the motions. I was the adult half the time, cleaning and making her meals. I guess that’s where I learned to cook. It was either teach myself or starve.” I give a small laugh to try to lighten the mood, but he only furrows his brow.
“I didn’t have any other family to turn to, and I was afraid if I told my teachers, they would take my mom away too, so I hid our home life from everyone. She distanced herself from her friends so much that they eventually stopped checking up on her. She could still function enough at that point to pay the bills with Dad’s life insurance money, and somehow, we got by through the years.”
I don’t know why I’m telling him all of this, but it feels good to talk to someone. It’s easy to talk to him.
“Eventually, we ran out of money and had to move into a tiny apartment. By then, I was almost sixteen and got a job to help pay the bills. I ended up having to drop out of school to take on more hours. It was a matter of survival at that point. Her mind got worse over the years, and I was working two jobs on top of caring for her and making sure she was eating and showering.” I stop my story there, not wanting to get into the rest of it.
“Where is she now?”
“She’s in a private mental facility up in Georgia right now, which is why I put up with Al. He paid me good money, and almost all the money I make goes to paying her expenses. She’s still my mother, even though I haven’t caught a glimpse of her since the day she kissed my dad goodbye. I have to believe she’s still in there, and if there is a chance she can find her way back, I want to give her the best resources to do it.”
He’s silent on the other end of the line, and for a moment, I feel fear creeping in that I may have told him too much, and he realizes I come with a lot of baggage.
“You really are the strongest person I know,” he says, breaking the silence. “Even after all you have been through, you still find it in your heart to put others' needs before yourself.
“I’m not strong, Jake,” I sigh, shaking my head against the pillow. “I did things I’m not proud of and stayed in situations that I knew weren’t good for me all because I was tired of being alone and wanted help, even if it came at the expense of myself.”
“You’re talking about him,” he says quietly. “What did he offer you?”
“A way out,” I say simply. “I don’t want to talk anymore tonight. I’ve told you things that I’ve never told anyone. If I’m being honest, I don’t know if I’ll ever be ready to share the rest.”
“Thank you for telling me. I know how hard that was for you, and I don’t take it lightly. Maybe you’ll be comfortable enough to tell me the rest one day. I really do want to be that safe place for you, Lyla,” he says softly. “Will you do me one more thing tonight?”
I meet his greys in the dim light, scared that I will be unable to deny this man anything. “I’ll try,” I whisper.
“Will you stay on the phone with me so I can watch you sleep?”
“You want to watch me sleep? Isn’t that a little weird?” I hide my smile against the covers, feeling giddy again.
“I like knowing you are here safe with me. I’ll sleep better if I can hear you breathing next to me.”
He weaves his way into another part of me that I’ve kept hidden as his words start to shine light in areas of my life that have been in the shadows for too long.
“Okay,” I nod. “I’ll keep my phone on.”
“Thank you,” he smiles. “Sweet dreams, Lyla.”
“You too,” I say sleepily. I snuggle deeper into the covers and watch the light from the phone play across his features until I’m finally pulled under into a deep, peaceful sleep.