Chapter 49
Chapter
Forty-Nine
Beau was standing on the porch, looking less than enthused. “You went running again without me! You were supposed to tell me! You promised!”
I laughed, pulling my shirt over my head. “I texted you!”
“I know, and I’m here now! You’re already done though!”
“That’s because you, my wonderful, beautiful, fantastic mate, were two hours late.”
Beau huffed, crossing her arms over her chest as she pouted. “You’re not even sorry.”
“Not even a little.” Lauren laughed. “It’s nice to run with another grounder, despite getting my ass handed to me every time we try to race.”
Kissing Beau on the cheek, she just stuck her bottom lip out further. “I’m not happy.”
“I know. I’m sorry, Beau. Next time, I promise. Plus, I feel like I’m nearly back to my usual shape.”
Lauren snorted. “Don’t say that. I’m in my prime and you just lapped me, Colt. Lapped me. An Alpha-8. I can’t even wrap my head around it. Yet you’re over here telling me I am not even losing to you at your best? Can you at least help my ego a little over here?”
I shrugged, and she slapped my chest. Beau didn’t let me walk away, grabbing me at my hips. It shocked me, and I held my hands up. Her eyes narrowed, and then her hands attacked my entire upper body.
“You are too fucking thin, Colt. Outside of the fact that your chest is bigger than mine right now, you are a stick!” She emphasized it by squeezing my sides, her hands not really able to squish anything. “There isn’t anything here but skin and organs. I thought Eva had you on a diet.”
My nose wrinkled. “She does.”
“She does, but…”
I groaned. “Beau, it’s a lot. How am I supposed to follow that? I barely ate that much when I was at my peak hunger while pregnant. I can’t eat that much when it’s not assisted. I really do make sure I have three meals a day.”
“Try being the operative word there.” Lauren poked my stomach as she walked into the house first.
Walking in after her, I grumbled. “You guys aren’t being fair.”
“I thought Eva said you’d gained some weight?” Beau stepped into the house behind me, shutting the door. “Where did it go?”
“It didn’t go anywhere! It’s right here.” I gestured to my body. “I am trying to recover myself. On top of that, I am an Omega. My body literally struggles with holding onto fat and muscle. There is a level of biology I can’t fight.”
Marcus stepped down the stairs, his eyes narrowing as I argued with Lauren and Beau.
He headed toward us as he hit the bottom, and I could see him gearing up to defend me.
We weren’t on the best of terms right now, but his dragon refused to go far.
Marcus also would step in if he felt my parents or Eva were going too far.
Shaking my head, I rolled my eyes. “I’m fine, guys. Really. I’m good. It has been going up. It doesn’t help that I lose calories because of how much I’m breastfeeding.” I didn’t want this to turn into an all-out brawl in the entryway.
Beau caught Marcus heading toward us and snorted. “You should be like Marcus. Be a bump on a log around the house more.”
If there was one thing Beau refused to stuff down, despite me warning her multiple times, was her anger towards Marcus.
It had gotten better as our relationship improved, but Beau still liked to poke the dragon.
She knew his buttons and the best way to get a rise out of him.
Sometimes she went too far, but Marcus usually didn’t rise to it.
Today, though, he seemed short on patience.
“What the hell does that mean?” Marcus snapped at her. “I am definitely not having fun with everything going on.”
Beau stepped up to him, squeezing his side. “I’m pretty sure this is a love handle, brother.”
Marcus’ weight was quickly outshining mine.
It felt nice for some heat to be taken off me, but it wasn’t something I was insecure about.
Marcus, on the other hand, seemed to let it affect him a little more.
He got clothes that fit him now, rather than squeezing into the old ones he had.
He was also working out; it just didn’t seem like the weight was coming off like he wanted.
When he first walked out in his slacks, button-up, and vest, I cried into Kayla’s head.
He looked normal. Except he wasn’t. The only thing I could focus on now was that he never wore his glasses.
They were sitting on his dresser, at least his second pair he kept at the house.
Only when the kids came over did he wear crystals; the rest of the family seemed to be okay with him at the strength he was now.
Marcus growled, swiping at her hands. Beau growled back at him, suddenly no longer playing. Lauren was shaking her head as she put her hand on her hip. I stayed off to the side, not really wanting to get in the middle of it.
“Maybe instead of lazing around like a fucking oaf, you should help Colton and Dad! They are still looking for a way to recover your memories!”
“You think I enjoy being here? I feel like I’m broken, Beau! I’m missing years of memories. Memories that have been replaced by fake ones, apparently. Feelings that are fake and you think I’m just sitting pretty here? You don’t even understand how it feels!”
She snorted, frosted air coming out of her nostrils.
“It’s your own damn fault! You need to do something about it!
You think you’re the only one who is hurting and broken because of this?
” Beau pointed in my direction. “Do you know what you have put him through? Do you even know the level of danger and pain you’ve put him in?
All because you thought you would play hero, and you failed.
Colton had to save your ass by leaving you behind and leaving in the hands of the she-bitch.
Then, after you’d been gone for months, you pop back up in her arms, forcing Colt to feel every single time you guys fucked!
You want to snap at me? You want to tell me you have been sitting here feeling sorry for yourself and missing your memories? All the while Colton has been dying!”
My heart dropped into my stomach. Beau was yelling at him things we hadn’t talked about yet.
I didn’t want him to know what led up to his being captured.
At this point, it didn’t matter, and I didn’t think he needed to know if he couldn’t recover his memories.
He already felt bad enough; Marcus didn’t need to be blaming himself more.
Marcus roared, and his hands shifted, claws grabbing Beau’s neck. Lauren yelled at him, but I moved faster. I slipped between them before he could slam her up against the cabinets. Reaching out, I look hold of Marcus’ face. His eyes were bright gold, and his scales showed beneath his skin.
“Stop it! Both of you! That’s enough!” I yelled at both of them. “Let her go!”
Slowly, Marcus looked down at me. His eyes locked with mine. We didn’t move, but I felt Beau gasp for breath. My chest was heaving as I held onto his face. He was searching mine, this being the closest we had been in weeks.
His hand brushed my cheek after shifting back to normal. The other held my side softly, not possessively, but as if I was going to break under too much pressure. My breath caught as his fingers brushed down my neck. I let out a shiver as they touched my mark.
“That’s enough, Marcus.” My voice was barely above a whisper.
He nodded, his hand falling from my face. “I’m sorry.”
I shook my head. “You need to apologize to Beau. You could have hurt her. She was talking about you gaining weight. She didn’t mean anything deeper.”
“She did. I knew what she meant.”
“That doesn’t mean you can attack her for it.” I looked away from him for the first time. “I’m disappointed in you.”
Marcus stepped back from me, and I felt like I was going to throw up. “Excuse me, then.”
My eyes shut as he walked past me, skipping every other step before a door down the hall slammed shut. I winced before slowly opening my eyes. Candice came out, a frown on her face as she bounced Kayla. She was crying, and I collected myself for a moment before heading up the stairs.
“What was that about?”
I took Kayla from her and tried to hush her. “Beau and Marcus were fighting.”
“What do I say about fighting in the house?”
Beau snorted. “He deserves more!”
Shaking my head again, I looked down at Beau and Lauren. “No, he doesn’t. You don’t need to add insult to injury.”
“But…”
“No, Beau. I thank you for caring about me, but don’t throw what happened in his face. He doesn’t remember. We will not hold it against him. One mistake exploded, but he’s been through hell too because of it.”
She let out a loud sigh. “Fine. I’m sorry.”
I smiled, accepting her apology with a nod.
“What if he never gets back his memories?”
Beau asked the question I had been avoiding thinking about since talking with Selene.
I didn’t say anything for a while. Looking down at Kayla, she was wiggling around and I could imagine her being a menace the moment she learned to be mobile.
Marcus used to tell me stories of the shenanigans he got into as a child.
If anything, she was going to take after him.
“Then we’ll figure it out.” I looked up. “We start again or part ways. I won’t force him into anything simply because I have memories and he doesn’t.”
“Colton!” It was Lauren this time. “What about…?”
I shook my head. “I’ll be fine.” Turning away, I addressed Candice. “When is she due for another feeding?”
“Probably not for another couple of hours. You might be able to get her back down. She was just starting to doze off when the door shut.”
“Thank you for watching her.”
Taking Kayla, I shut my door on the way and then stepped into the nursery.
Sitting down in the rocker, I adjusted her on my chest as I leaned back.
Patting her back, I got a good burp out of her before I felt her settle down to sleep.
Closing my eyes, I figured it would be better to sleep than to think about everything.
We dozed off together until she started gnawing on my collarbone.
“Oh yeah, sweetheart? That hungry?”
Chuckling, I got up and moved over to my room.
Grabbing the pump, I set it on the bed, plugging it in before sitting down on the bed.
Looking down, I wrinkled my nose. I missed a feeding, which meant they were overfull.
I should have done a quick pump before I fell asleep.
Choosing the less full one, I set up Kayla first before starting the pump.
Candice came and checked on us, but I wasn’t feeling hungry. The fight had zapped everything out of me. She wasn’t happy, but she left me be. If anything, I was going to end up with a surprise visit from Eva tomorrow. Then I’d be in serious trouble.
It turned to night, but my little pterodactyl decided she wanted to try to crawl again. Or at least practice. I unwrapped her and set her on the bed. I had one leg up blocking in some wild case she up and tried to walk off the bed.
My phone was next to me, and sure enough, I had two missed calls from Eva from an hour ago. Sighing, I just flipped my phone over. I’d deal with it tomorrow.
Reaching out, I attacked her sides, and she smiled, trying to squirm away. She was already giggling and grabbing at me. There was a knock on the door, and I looked up.
“Are you up?”
“Yeah, I’m up.”
Marcus paused for a moment before asking, “Can I come in?”
Part of me wanted to say no. Not after today. Letting out a sigh, I tried to let some of the tension go.
“Yeah. You can come in.”
The door opened slowly, and Marcus slipped in. He was holding a plate of food and carrying a water bottle. Shutting the door behind him, he stared at the plate. Slowly, his eyes rose to look at me. We didn’t move for a moment until I looked down at Kayla making noises.
“Mom said you didn’t eat dinner. She was worried.”
I smiled and helped Kayla right herself a little as she tried to reach and pull herself forward. “Yeah. I’m going to get a lecture tomorrow. She told on me to Eva.”
“It’s my fault that you didn’t eat.”
It wasn’t worded as a question, but I answered it. “No, I just wasn’t really hungry. My appetite goes up and down. Especially when breastfeeding. Some days I could eat a horse; others I don’t want to touch anything but water.”
“You should eat a little something.” He placed the plate with a sandwich and a handful of chips on my nightstand. “Even if you aren’t hungry.”
Laughing, I shook my head. “Now you’re sounding almost normal.”
He stood next to the bed, and I looked up at him. His hand reached out and brushed my jaw. The look on his face was complicated. Pain mixed with amazement was the best I could describe it.
“I mostly dream about you.”
I moved my head out of his hand. “In any other context, that would be a good pickup line.”
He pulled his hand back, making a fist beside him. His head turned, looking at Kayla. Reaching out, I didn’t know what he was going for, but I grabbed his wrist before he could reach her.
I didn’t even realize I was doing it. It was just an automatic reaction. My eyes widened as I stared at my hand holding his arm. Closing my eyes for a moment, I didn’t let go, just holding it tight.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t ask.”
Shaking my head, I couldn’t look at him.
I knew the pain I was going to find. As much as I wish I hadn’t done it, I couldn’t let it go.
I couldn’t do it. I was scared. If he got attached to Kayla, or vice versa, and he and I couldn’t mend whatever was between us, there would be so much more hurt than there already was.
His hand pulled back, and I let it go slowly. I stared at Kayla, tears falling down my face. We didn’t say anything, but Marcus turned and left. Covering my mouth, I sobbed into it.
The door clicked quietly, and I curled up in a ball, pulling Kayla closer. I cried over her quietly. Eventually picking her up and holding her close. After everything I said, I was the worst. I was the worst of everyone.