Chapter 20
TWENTY-THREE YEARS OLD
My entire existence told me not to allow them to put me in the rocky coffin-looking compartment, so I fought the two silent guards pulling me closer. Their faces and hands bled from my scratches.
As they struggled to control me, an old fat, bald, white man in a lab coat walked into the room.
His perfect teeth gleamed as his smile widened, watching me fight them.
“Miss Michaelson. It has been way too long.” His voice drew a frightful shriek from me, and the two men groaned and covered their ears at the loudness.
It was the only way I could deafen the fear to ensure I would not freeze.
I took advantage they didn’t like my scream and turned to get back in the elevator but they caught me.
He chuckled. “You’ve definitely grown in all the right places. What did you do this time? Hmm—” He sighed. “Ever the apple of my eye.” The way his eyes perused my body … even from far away, was nauseating.
“I fucking killed your little bitchy twin is what I did!” I screamed.
His smile disappeared, and I thought his eyes widened with some shock and concern. “Not Callum?”
It was all worth it until one of the men punched me so hard on the face, I fell to the ground. Blood gushed from my throbbing nose, and the world spun. I was beyond exhausted, and between the slamming of my head, the choking, and now a bloody nose I felt as if I’d been mangled by a tiger.
In the chamber, my body rattled in full panic.
Past images of the compartment filling with water and drowning in it attacked me.
I swallowed the blood in my throat and breathed through my mouth fast and ragged.
As they covered the chamber with a criss-crossed wooden lid, I couldn’t help it, I begged, “Please. Don’t—”
The old man appeared above me, once again chuckling. “Not so tough now, are we, my little delicious apple?” The way he pronounced the nickname with such malicious intent was disgusting.
It didn’t matter how much or hard I tried to push or kick at the encasement, I was trapped. The frigid water rose, stabbing at the marrow of my bones, quickly reaching my lips.
I’d killed him, but they still had me under their control.
Through the squares, I only saw the high stone ceiling and bright lights.
My breathing violently trembled with my body.
“Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!” I screamed when the frigid water started rising and wetting my body.
“No! No! No!” My teeth chattered so loudly, like never before.
I kicked at the lid again and again and it hardly moved.
The chambered became pitch dark when they covered it with solid metal.
“No! No! Help me! Get me out of here—" I arched back my neck to lift my nostrils above the water and took the deepest breath possible, and within seconds, I was completely immersed.
The water overfilled the compartment, splashing onto the ground outside.
The water filled my nostrils, burning the back of my throat and freezing my esophagus and trachea at the same time.
I pushed the water out, but it kept rising.
Bubbles blew to the surface as I release my first breath, and then there was no more space, no more seconds left before the hell that was this torture truly began.
As soon as I ran out of air, water filled all of me up, no matter how much I moved, fought.
Help! I lost all strength, and the memories swept through my mind.
I was at a doorway into what appeared to be a warehouse.
A few yards in front of me, a distracted boy lay with his knees under him, naked like me and humming a familiar song, pretending to draw something on the floor with his fingers.
I’d heard that song before … that voice.
Sometimes, I would hear him through the walls, sobbing, screaming and he’d start humming it to calm himself.
It happened so often that sometimes, when Mael came into my room to hurt me, I found myself needing to listen to it.
Make you feel my love …. That’s what he was humming.
The dirt covered his gaunt body in patches. His straight black hair and high cheeks reminded me of … Killian.
Are you afraid of death, little angel? His voice played like a song in my mind and brought back bits of memories of him from when we were young.
For a second, it was as if I were in two places at once or waking from a dream. The frigid water filled my stomach. I was drinking too much of it. I fought being back in reality, needing to be in my dream with my husband. Killian! Killiannnnnn!
Even though I knew it couldn’t really be him, I called out his name with decades worth of desperation, the same decades I had been forced to live without him. “Killian.”
The little boy raised his eyes to me. Are you real? Killian? A warmth reached my chest, slowing down my heart, followed by the calmness I’d been craving all my life. Thank you, Death. Thank you so fucking much for arriving fast. Is this heaven? Killian, are you dead? Are we both dead?
I ran into the frigid room where the ironclad chamber that imprisoned him stood. It was shaped like a giant birdhouse. He got up and appeared as if he couldn’t believe I was really there. His eyes bulged in shock and his mouth gaped open.
“Killian, I can’t believe you’re really here!”I yelled, ectatic, and reached through the metal poles into his cage, trying to reach him. Nothing else mattered.
“Magdalena, w-what are you doing here?” My smile melted as my damaged heart shattered. He wasn’t happy to see me.“You have to get out of here!”
“No. No. Please Killian. I—I love you. I’ve missed you so much. Please. Don’t—”
“Magdalena. Run!” His scream was so loud that it echoed. “What are you doing here?”
I tried again to see if I could make him happy to see me.
Obviously, he didn’t understand that I didn’t give a damn about the consequences, that I’d go straight to hell just to hug him.
“I-I don’t know, but I’m so happy to see you.
” My voice broke and tears started filling my eyes.
“Pl-Please Killian. Please!” With iron poles between us, we embraced.
I didn’t feel dead. It was the most alive I’d felt since he’d disappeared.
I kissed his cheek, trying to kiss each of his gorgeous freckles despite the dirt.
He smelled terrible, but I didn’t care. “Killian, I’ve missed you so much.
So much.” My tears poured from how badly it had hurt to not have him by my side. Why was he not speaking?
His body trembled, so I slowly pulled back and saw the terror in his eyes as they stared behind me.
A tall balding man with wrinkled peach skin and blue eyes the shape of Mael’s walked behind us.
His smile at Killian was cold, holding only malice.
Killian’s teeth chattered. Not long after the man entered the room, Mael followed.
I turned, with my back against the railing, watching their every step.
“You still remember him, Maggie? That’s not good news for you,” Mael said. Killian’s body warmed my back.
“What’s she doing here? Why did you bring her?
” Killian’s anger, although bold and loud, held no power.
At first, I was hurt by his words and wanted to ask him why didn’t he want to see me?
But his terror at the sight of this man was blatant.
It made me want to comfort my sweet husband.
“You promised you wouldn’t hurt her if I let you do it to me! ”
“Although I’ve grown quite fond of you, little man, my son comes first, and that little bitch you’re holding so dearly is going to be his whether you like it or not.”
“Magdalena is my wife! She’s mine! You can’t take her from me!” Killian’s furious scream echoed. He banged and kicked at the metal, hurting his hands and feet.
Mael walked closer, taunting, “I already took her from you, you idiot. And your little fake Gypsy wedding meant absolutely nothing.” The air from his vile mouth and words hit my ear.
I cringed into the iron bars, then turned to face Killian.
I had to be strong for him. I couldn’t help tightening my grip on the metal and deviating my gaze from Killian.
The shame kept me from facing him and telling him how Mael beat me on the daily.
Killian placed the tips of his fingers under my chin and raised it so I would look at him.
“Is he the one who gave you that black eye, angel?” I didn’t have to answer.
Killian knew the minute our eyes met. What he didn’t know was that Mael beat me every time he realized I had not yet forgotten him.
Every day, he’d come into my room. Of course, I’d tried to hide it, but he could always tell.
There were days I wished I could forget Killian but the abuse made our memories that much sweeter.
Every beating was followed by another drowning session.
The doctor said it was to help me forget.
“You have to force her to be with you, don’t you? You’ll never really have her,” Killian warned before spitting on Mael’s cheek.
“I swear to God, I’m going to kill you one day when my father is done with you,” Mael threatened while Killian and I stared into each other’s eyes.
Mael kept throwing insults, but I could hardly hear him because I was safe and warm in Killian’s beautiful eyes.
I was home and didn’t want to ever leave again.
I never wanted to return to reality again.
If this was death, then fuck life. Suddenly the edges of my vision started darkening. “I love you too, angel.”
“Miss Michaelson!” They were performing CPR on me, blowing air into my mouth. I shook my head, trying to stop them then vomited water again and again and again. “Goddammit! I told them this was too long for her! Always pushing the limit. I’m not going to be responsible for anyone’s death.”
Please go away … All I wanted was to enjoy the little time Killian and I had together, even if it was seconds. The warmth of his fingers interlaced with mine comforted me so deeply that I dared feel safe. Safe. God, the sensation was heaven.
I love you I mouthed.
Desperate for Killian to ignore Mael’s ranting, I whispered, “Shhh … Killian, look at me.” He did. “He just wants to anger you. We’re together. That’s all that matters. We can be togeth—”
“Magdalena, this isn’t a good place.” Killian’s eyes filled with tears and his face wrinkled with anguish.
I thought he was in pain. Big hands wrapped around my waist, shutting down my thoughts, my voice.
The man yanked me away from Killian with very little effort.
I was weak from all the drowning sessions they’d been putting me through.
Guilt flowed through me because I couldn’t hold onto him anymore.
“Killian!” I wailed while twisting, kicking, punching, and biting.
“Enough! Come, you little whore,” Mael’s father yelled as he carried me like a ragdoll.
“What are you doing?” Killian’s voice overspilled with terror. “No! Francois! Don’t hurt her! I’ll do anything you want. Did you hear me? Anything!” He kept trying to pull the cell posts out of the cement while Mael laughed.
“You get to watch me make her all mine.” Mael chuckled at Killian. “Me first, Papa.” First? What was Mael talking about?
“What are you doing? First what?” I screamed.
“You refuse to forget him,” he explained to me.
“You wanted to see your Killian, didn’t you?
Well … here you go. Now he will watch everything.
” Mael yanked at my dirty hair, dragging me so fast and hard that I tripped.
I tumbled, facing the door as other boys marched into the room in a single file, followed by men, until the gigantic room was filled to the brim.
They were naked underneath black gowns with hoods opened down the middle.
I thought he would beat me up, like always. It was so much worse.
The images exploding in my mind drew screams out of me. Even half awake, I felt them pinning me down, the helplessness, the pain, and their disgusting bodies on and inside mine. They held me down in front of Killian and forced themselves on me, every one of them. And then—
“Ahhhhhhh!” Running away from the dream, I screamed for as long as possible, trying to move, punch, and scream.